Okay so here's another chapter. Thank you for all of the kind reviews, I'm totally touched. I especaially love it when you guys like pick apart the chapter and get to the core meaning, building the pieces of the relationship and where it went wrong and what they need to do to fix it. I get like totally excited. I'm kinda a nerd that way.
I will explain later why Orihime hymen wasn't intact but the answer is not in this chapter so.
Please, Read, Review, and Enjoy!
Tokyo Summer 2013
Rukia sits outside on the stoop of her home, Kumiko clutched tightly in her arms.
She was expelled from the daycare that she goes to. The owner told her that the press was swarming around the school, causing a ruckus and endangering the other children trying to take pictures of Kumiko.
No other daycare would take her as well, afraid of the negative press that it would bring their school. Rukia wanted to be pissed off. She wanted to burn down the schools and centers.
But this was all her fault. Her innocent daughter, who's done nothing but be born, has a terrible reputation and it is all her fault. It's Rukia's fault that her daughter is an outcast. She feels as though she is the worst mother in the world. She wants to tell Ichigo. But it would only solve to anger him and he'll probably do something extremely ridiculous and horrifyingly awful.
She sighs, looking down at her beautiful girl. "Mommy's sorry Kumiko…mommy's sorry that she's ruined your life…I promise to dedicate my life to making yours better."
"That's sweet," Rukia head shoots up to meet the arrogant grin of the man with the tattoos and weird eyebrows. She glares at him.
"Why do you keep bothering me?"
"Calm down woman, you look like you can use a beer." He says, moving to sit down next to her. He places the drink besides her, and opens his own. "You know you have a real pretty girl there." He says.
"Arigato. She looks like her aunt."
"So I have a question that I've been meaning to ask. Why did you sleep with a married man?" he takes a gulp of his drink, looking off into the distance.
"That's a personal question and you don't know me like that."
"I figure that you probably would want someone to talk to. I know that he broke up with you."
"Are you spying on me? Why does what I do come as such an interest to you?"
"Because you're interesting." She sighs, rolling her violet eyes. "Also, everything is all in the newspapers, magazines, internet, tv…you're famous. I wouldn't be surprised if you got your own t.v show."
"Kami, if I tell you why I did it you would you leave me alone forever?" she is relenting easy, she knows this. But what he says is true, she wants someone to talk to about this and everyone she could talk to has abandoned her. So maybe this stranger could alleviate some of the pressure in her chest.
"Sure, why not."
She sighs, "To be honest, I was in love with him long before he met her. We met at work. We were both interns. I fell in love with him instantly. He was so handsome and smart, always scowling yet smiling at the same time if you can believe it. He would always blow off work because he would rather be doing something else. He was…an amazing guy, one of my closest friends. But he always treated me like a sister. Our relationship was purely platonic, although I prayed for more.
"I knew it when he fell in love with her. He fell hard and fast. It showed. He was nicer, to everyone. Although he came to work less, when he was there he tried harder. He had already planned a life out for them and he wanted to earn his keep so he could provide for her. It was almost like an obsession the way he was in love with her. It almost seemed as though he couldn't breathe correctly without her.
"You know, the company has been trying for years to get her to be the face. Although they have their hands in a little bit of everything, hotels, restaurants, clothing stores, they are a cosmetic company first and foremost. And they have been trying since she was 16 and named Japan's princess to get her to be the face. So when he fell in love with her, they tried to use that to their advantage to get her to become the face of the company. But he didn't care. I'm positive that work never came up when they were together." Rukia sighs and looks down at Kumiko.
"I need to put her in bed. Just wait out here for a minute."
"Are you sure that you're coming back?" She rolls her eyes and leave, going to tuck her daughter in. She's back quickly, taking a seat and popping the tab and taking a sip.
"Anyway, I backed off when I realized that I didn't stand a chance. She brought out the best in him. He was becoming a better person because of her. He wasn't as selfish, he was more empathetic, his hard brown eyes became soft and caring. It was obvious that he didn't even see anyone else when he was with her. I was fine to just go away and continue to be his best friend that he didn't notice. But then, they started losing children and he became depressed. I could tell that she was hurting him. He never spoke about it. He began to stay at work longer, drink more, and goes home less. He looked so terrible.
"His marriage was obviously taking a terrible toll on him. I just wanted to make him feel better, talk to him, maybe get him to tell me what was going on. But then he made a move on me. He was drunk; he couldn't even get my name right. I could have called him a cab. I could have avoided all of this; I could have helped him avoid all of this. But it was something that I wanted for so long. I guess you could say that I took advantage of him.
"I'm a terrible person. I know it. And for my sins, my daughter will pay the price which makes me a bad mother as well. I took advantage of a broken man. I broke the heart of a beautifully kind woman. I destroyed the life of my daughter. I'm a bad person." She takes a long gulp of her drink.
"Yeah…you messed up a lot of people's lives. You…you made a huge mess of things." He laughs shaking his head. "But…you're not a bad person. You just did some bad things."
"What's the difference?"
"Well if you were a bad person, you wouldn't have cared that you ruined the life of your best friend, his wife and your daughter and possibly the company."
She laughs. It's been awhile since she heard the sound of her own laugher.
"Kami, are you trying to make me feel better? Because that's terrible, you've done a terrible job." She laughs harder.
"Oi, I was trying my best. It's the last time that I'll ever help you. Baka," he mutters.
"Baka? You're calling me baka? You're the one who has crazy tattoos and weird eyebrows."
"Oi! This makes me look cool."
"Really? So you chose to look that way? I was hoping that you lost a bet."
"Okay, I'm going to get you for that one. Just you wait, your turn is coming."
They chuckle in the quiet silence of the night, staring into the night sky, looking at the stars.
Rukia's heart is far from being healed, but she's glad that she was able to get that all off her chest. She feels better.
"By the way, my name is Abarai. Abarai Renji."
BrOkEn
Their lips crushes against each other, full of desperation and need, they drink one another in. They are lost and hurt and broken, and although this is wrong and they both know it, they become entangled in each other. His fingers knot themselves in her long orange tresses, hers tighten in his hair.
There is nothing sweet about this kiss. There isn't anything tender. It is only desperation and need. Its animal, it's ferocity; there is pain and hurt mangled in with their rapid breathing. Their hearts are being overworked at the pace in which they are beating. One of them will surely burst.
Ichigo hands leave her hair and moves to her waist. Grabbing her, he lifts her on to the counter, knocking the chairs away forcefully, he moves closer to her until he is between her legs and there is no space between them.
Orihime's heart is beating much too fast. In the back of her mind, she is irrationally thinking that she might have a heart attack at this rate. She franticly moves her lips against his. Her fingers pulls his hair, her toes curl as sensations and feelings that she haven't had in forever assault her mind, rushing forward to the surface.
When the need for air arises, he breaks apart from her bruised lips and assaults her neck, nipping and wetly kissing the thin skin. Her head falls back as a moan escapes her lips. Her nails scrape his skull, setting his body aflame with her touch, his mind numbing as he quickly become addicted as he had so many years ago, once more.
Ichigo feels something hit his stomach. Orihime is quickly brought back to realty as if a cold bucket of water was thrown on her. She winces in pain, breaking away from Ichigo, bringing her hands to her stomach with a slight breathless groan of pain.
Ichigo steps back and looks at her, worry filling his brown eyes. "What's going on? What's happening?" his eyes searches hers, glancing down at her stomach. She nods her head, wincing in pain once more.
"I'm fine…it's just the boys…they're kicking me pretty hard…"
Ichigo brown eyes widen and he looks down at her protruding stomach in wonder. She looks at him staring at her stomach; her brain is still clouded over from what just occurred she's trying to sort her emotions and feelings.
He gingerly places his hand on her stomach, looking up at her for confirmation. She nods, looking down at him. He turns his attention back to her stomach and smile.
She watches as he touches her stomach, talking and smiling, making excited sounds when he feels the kicks of the boys. This breaks her heart.
She's wanted this….she has wanted this for so long, for so long this was denied her. But this is false. This is wrong. She and Ichigo are no longer together. They are broken up and they should stay that way.
"Oh Kami, I need to go…I have to leave," she breathes in a shuddering breath. Ichigo looks up to her, his face falling.
"Orihime no…no please wait." She shakes her head, pushing him away from her as she shimmies down off the counter.
She rushes out of the kitchen; he is hot on her tail, pleading her not to go.
"Orihime wait, stop! What about what just happened in there? You still love me I can tell? We can still be a family again."
"No we can't," she turns around and faces him. "Ichigo we can't. What happened in there was a mistake. You have a family, with Rukia and Kumiko. You don't need us." His heart breaks and he becomes angry.
"What the fuck do you mean that I don't need you?!" he yells. He runs his hand through his hair in frustration. "Of course I fucking need you! I'm going to need all three of you and the fact that you're taking them halfway across the country is really fucked up. Just so you know."
Orihime takes a few steps back, surprised by his sudden mood change. No longer was he sad and depressed. "For years I couldn't give you the one thing that you wanted. Now that you finally have it, you excommunicate me from their lives before their even born."
"Gomen Ichigo, but being around you is much too painful and I don't want my children to be the reason that you neglect her."
"Do you even hear what you're saying? Orihime that doesn't make any fucking sense! I won't neglect her, she's my daughter. I love her just like I love them and just like I love you! I'm sorry that I hurt you and I am sorry that I had her but I do not regret it. That little girl is the best mistake that I've ever made."
"I understand that Ichigo. I want to resent the little girl but I don't. What type of person would I be if I hated a little girl because of her parents? If anything the reason that I can't hate her is because of you. For some stupid reason I still love you, and there isn't anything that can change that apparently. But I don't trust you with my heart anymore. Kami, I don't even trust myself with it. I gave it to you and look what happen!"
"Orihime, I know that I screwed up. I know that I hurt you and I'm sorry for it. You have no idea how sorry I am, but I'm trying to make it up to you if only you'll let me."
"Ichigo you can't make it up to me. You'll be forever tied to that woman. She'll be a constant reminder of what happened she'll always be in our lives."
"So that's it? Because of my ties to my daughter we can't be together?" Orihime closes her eyes and presses her hand to her forehead, tears streaming down her face. "Well I'm sorry Hime, but I can't choose between the two of you. I won't leave my daughter behind like I won't leave you or my sons behind."
"Ichigo I'm not saying that. I'm just saying that you hurt me. To my very core you hurt me and you continued to do so. You basically moved out of our house and lived with her. I hardly ever saw you, and when I did you were always like some robot or something! The fact that you didn't care about me or my feelings killed me inside!"
"Well at least we know how each other feels! Because for years I sat outside that Goddamn room, waiting for you to finally give a fuck and let me in! You acted as if you were the only one that was affected by those damn miscarriages? Orihime you were selfish. You were selfish in thinking that I wouldn't have cared. You were selfish in never even asking me how I fucking felt! You withdrew from me! You wouldn't let me near you for months! And then this whole fucking process started over again!"
"At least I never cheated on you and had someone else's child!"
"WELL HOW THE FUCK WAS I TO KNOW! YOU WERE SO FAR AWAY FROM ME I COULDN'T REACH YOU!"
"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WITHDREW, I WAS ALWAYS THERE!"
"NO, YOU WERE ALWAYS WITH AWRISAWA! OR IN THAT FUCKING BABY'S ROOM!"
"HER NAME WAS KUMIKO! OR DID YOU FORGET AGAIN?!"
"MAYBE IF YOU'D TRUSTED ME TO HELP YOU, YOU WOULD HAVE FORGOTTEN HER AS WELL! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU HOLDING ON TO ALL THAT SHIT ANYWAY?"
"You want me to get rid of it? Is that what you want Ichigo? Huh?" she storms past him into the hall were Kumiko's nursery is. She throws the door open. "Fine, I'll get rid of everything!" she pulls pictures from the wall, knock things from off of the shelves. "I'll get rid of everything!" she yells, pushing over the crib. She's completely destroying the room.
"Orihime, stop it!" Ichigo yells, coming up behind her.
"No! I'm letting go. When I let go of her, then I'll be able to let go of you! And I so desperately want to let go of you." She continues pulling things down, ripping the baby clothes, tearing apart the mobile, throwing the toys against the wall.
"Orihime stop it!" Ichigo grunts, grabbing her and forcing her body close to his. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. But I didn't mean that you should forget about her."
"Let me go Ichigo!" she struggles against his hard, unyielding body.
"What I meant was that you should let her go and move on. Don't forget about her. I was an ass for forgetting her name, but I never forgot about her. Never. Just her name, but never her," he tells her sadly.
She groans in pain, clutching her stomach. Her knees went out causing Ichigo to take on a majority of her weight. She can feel something hot, wet and sticky slide down her legs.
She looks up at Ichigo with panicked and distressed eyes. He quickly springs into motion, scooping her up and running to the car.
He had prayed the last time that he wouldn't ever have to go through this terrible norm ever again.
It seems as though his prayers always go unanswered.
Wow, that went downhill fast. But did you really expect them to make up that easily?
Questions, Comments, and/or Concerns?
