Author's Note: You guys own my heart seriously. I keep on feeling inspired and it's all thanks to you. ;)

The next couple chapters are HUGE for this story, in regards to filling in the missing pieces of the past and setting up the future, so I hope you keep reading.

Thanks again to the fabulous Hana who did an amazing job beta-ing as usual and to Jess for unblocking me. hugs

Chapter Twelve "Paranoid Eyes"

Button your lip. And don't let the shield slip.
Take a fresh grip on your bulletproof mask.
And if they try to break down your disguise with their questions
You can hide, hide, hide,
Behind paranoid eyes.

You put on our brave face and slip over the road for a jar.
Fixing your grin as you casually lean on the bar,
Laughing too loud at the rest of the world
With the boys in the crowd
You can hide, hide, hide,
Behind petrified eyes.

Pink Floyd

"What do you say we order Chinese?" Nathan suggested, signing his name to a few more documents at his desk, as he did.

Haley's stomach turned; Chinese was definitely not something Dumpling craved. "Oh, what about Italian? They just opened a new place down the block and I swear the fried ravioli is an exact copy of that little place we used to go in Durham."

Nathan picked up the receiver with a charming grin. "Then let's do it."

An hour later, they both had polished off their pasta entrees and Haley had just snatched the last fried ravioli.

"You suck, Hales," Nathan sulked, bringing his water bottle to his lips, as she triumphantly popped the last one in her mouth.

"I thought you loved when I sucked." she flirted, causing him to choke a bit on the sip of water he'd just taken.

'Damn, her pregnancy hormones.' She had never been this horny in her life and working late nights with her ex, who was the best she ever had, was not helping matters, but God she was climbing the walls and had been for the five nights they'd spent together. Every night her mind would wander to him taking her on top of the desk, pounding in and out of her, giving her the relief she craved…multiple times.

Shifting in his chair uncomfortably, Nathan tried to run sports stats through his head, anything to get his hard on to deflate. With just one hint of the things she used to do to him, she had him at full alert.

'Would it be so wrong if she just made out with him?' Her body was growing hot just imagining his tongue fighting with hers, his hands roaming…and that's why she couldn't. Nathan would feel something he shouldn't because lord knows he never kept his hands to himself even with just a kiss, not that she ever wanted him to but still.

"So…" Nathan attempted to speak, however, his eyes were now glued to her chest as she reached over to start to gather the food containers. He had a perfect view of her breasts spilling out of her sky blue lace bra, thanks to the oversized scoop neck cream sweater she was sporting today. It would take at most, one or two seconds to yank that top over her head and have his lips sucking and licking all over the mounds that her bra was showcasing.

"So…"Haley repeated, causing an awkward laugh between them.

The ringing of Haley's cell diverted their attention, and she rushed to grab it out of her purse before it stopped. Seeing the name on the caller ID, though, she hit silent and tossed the phone back in her purse. She was not in the mood to talk one of his flings out of bathroom they had locked themselves in after discovering his 'Wham Ban Thank You Ma'am' technique.

"It's only Chris," she explained to a blatantly curious Nathan.

A sour expression crossed his features. "Are you two close or something?" he grumbled, not able to hide his contempt for the poser that was all over his girl.

"We're just friends Nathan," Haley reassured him, trying not to laugh at the relief immediately flashing in his eyes.

Muttering under his breath, he opened a folder on his desk, handing her a couple of papers she needed to look over and sign, which she promptly complied.

"Listen Nathan, I just wanted to say thank you," Haley suddenly said, after a couple minutes of silence, obviously surprising him.

"For what?"

"For keeping your word and not crossing the line while we're trying so hard to get this center up and running," she honestly commended him, while pulling back into a low ponytail with a holder that had been around her wrist.

Smirking, Nathan languidly pushed his chair away from his desk and rose to his feet. Walking out from around his desk he came up behind her and placed his large strong hands on her shoulders, instantly kneading them with the exact amount of pressure he knew she craved.

Instinctively moaning at his touch, Haley closed her eyes and lowered her head some to give him better access.

Leaning down, he brought his lips to her ear. "Trust me Hales, it's taken every ounce of will in me."

"So what's this then?" Haley managed to get out, with a smile, as his long fingers melted her tension away.

Chuckling in that low husky tone that never failed to give her goose bumps, his hands reluctantly left her shoulders. "Just a reminder," he whispered once more in her ear, then strolled nonchalantly back to his chair, ignoring the puppy dog she was now sporting.

"Why'd you stop?" she whimpered.

Opening another file, he raised his eyes to hers. "Because if I left my hands on you for even a second longer, they wouldn't be just massaging your shoulders."

As his eyes went back to the file in front of him, a blush spread across her cheeks. She was definitely going to have to start making sure Lucas was with them at all times. One more late night with Nathan and she wasn't sure she'd be able to stop her raging hormones no matter what mammoth complications would surely ensue.

"This is going to be so much fun!" Brooke beamed as she linked arms with Haley and Peyton while strolling through the open doors, thanks to two cheerful salesgirls, of one of the most popular maternity shops in New York City.

"Welcome the Liz Lange Boutique ladies, I'm Elizabeth Ross. Which one of you is the mommy to be?" a polite and stylish woman in her mid forties asked as the girls came into her view.

"We all are," Brooke informed her with a straight face.

"Well, if you come right this way I'll fit you with a selection of pregnancy pillows so you girls can be sure of how things will fit in the next few months. All our mommies find it very helpful in selecting wardrobe choices that will accommodate their changing body."

Once she turned her back to them, Peyton ripped her arm away from Brooke's. "Excuse me, but why do I have to pretend I'm pregnant?"

"Because it's like a glimpse in the future P. Saywer, go with it."

"Yeah Peyton, go with it," Haley teased, loving the fact Peyton was going to be tortured right along with her.

Twenty minutes later…

"I hate you both so much," Peyton muttered coming up beside them at the large three-way mirror wearing a black strapless maternity dress over a six-month belly.

Brooke turned to face her, in the exact same dress only in a vibrant pink, with a slightly larger stomach. "Ah, you look so adorable!"

Laughing at Peyton's murderous expression, Haley continued to stare at herself in the mirror, a white halter dress with green embroidery across the hem, adorning her would be six to seven month pregnant body. She figured she was going to need a lot of light airy dresses during the last few months, seeing as she was going to have to endure them through spring and summer.

"We so need a picture!" Brooke announced, and began to dig through her purse to find her camera.

"No, no no!" Peyton adamantly objected. "Haley, stop her right this second. You begged me to come to help you wrangle Brooke, now return the favor."

Smiling coyly, Haley put her arm around Peyton's shoulder. "Come on Pey, it will make the baby happy."

"That is so evil Haley James. Using your fetus against me."

Haley smiled innocently. "I would never, but you know dumpling here," she pointed to her midsection, "senses when I'm upset and you not being in the picture could send me into a hysterical mood swing."

"Tutormom, quit calling her Dumpling, we agreed on Babycakes and we don't want her to get confused."

"It could be a boy," Peyton taunted.

Brooke gasped in horror, just as Peyton predicted. "You bitch! Take that back right now; it's a girl and you know it."

With a heavy sigh, Haley rested her hands on her lower back, thrusting her bump more outward, a position that would become more and more frequent as she grew, to help alleviate the pressure of carrying the extra weight.

Sensing Haley's aggravation, Peyton plastered a painfully fake smile on her face, as a salesgirl came up and Brooke handed her the camera. After the zillionth picture, though, she was smiling and laughing for real, enjoying this time with her best friends, as they blew kisses to the camera and struck every pose imaginable, bellies and all.

Peyton hadn't been shocked, when she came back from LA and Haley confessed all to her. Maybe it was the artist in her, the part that's supposed to see the truth in anything, to notice the tiniest hint of hidden depths, a person doesn't outwardly want you to see.

Whatever it was, she had known something big was going on with Haley, yet understanding that Haley was similar to her, in the way she dealt with things internally, Peyton hadn't pushed her to talk. She knew when Haley was ready she'd come to her and she had. Sure, Brooke finding out had kind of propelled the confession, but Peyton didn't doubt for a second that Haley would have told them very soon regardless.

"Brooke, I can't believe you're still wearing that," Haley chided for the millionth time as they came into their apartment; all three with arms full of bags that contained practically an entire wardrobe from lingerie to evening wear to suit Haley's rapidly expanding figure.

Setting the bags she held down, Brooke rubbed her protruding faux belly that was straining underneath the tight pink top she had worn into the store. "Ok um, Haley please don't refer to my bump as "that". She has a name and it's Penelope Gwen Davis after moi and the fabulousness that is Gwen Stefani, who wore sky high heels no matter how pregnant she got.

Haley collapsed onto the couch, rubbing her real, albeit smaller bump through her newly purchased navy kimono sleeved top, with an empire waist. "At least we talked you down to a smaller size. I swear I can't believe you wanted to wear the nine month one."

"You wouldn't have complained when I got us into Nobu without a reservation. There's no way they could say no to a hungry pregnant girl who wants one last night of incredible food before she's sentenced to a life of McDonalds and colored Goldfish."

"Thanks Brooke," Haley deadpanned, not enjoying the visual aid of her future meals.

"No prob love," Brooke happily replied, oblivious to the fact that Haley's gratitude was anything but sincere. "Oh, I forgot to tell you guys Chris called and asked if we wanted to go out to lunch today before he left town."

Peyton halted going through the mail and flipped her left wrist over to get a glimpse of her watch. "Brooke it's four o'clock! "

"Duh, that's why I said I forgot."

"Well, it's my fault too Peyton," Haley interjected. "Chris called last night, but I was with Nathan so didn't answer. Can you believe he's actually jealous of Chris?"

"Yes," Brooke and Peyton answered in unison without hesitation.

Haley sat up a little straighter, crossing her arms over chest. "Oh come on, why? It's Chris."

"Are you serious?" Peyton incredulously asked and at Haley's nod she continued. "Nathan got pissy, if a guy even dared look at you let alone actually talked to you. Hell, he would even get grumpy when Brooke and I took away from his "Hawey" time."

"Well, whatever. I still think it's ridiculous to get jealous of Chris of all people. That's just gross on so many levels." She loved Chris, she did, but the thought of ever dating him made her laugh out loud. He was like the gay guy of their group, only he liked women—if it that made sense?

Peyton rolled her eyes at them all. "What I can't believe is that we sound like we're in high school again. I swear we've had this exact same conversation before. Just insert random guy number 80 in Chris's spot."

Laughing, Brooke laid down on her back with her knees up, her hands resting on her favorite new accessory, Penelope. "But unlike those random guys, Haley actually made out with Chris," Brooke reminded Haley, in an attempt to torment her.

Haley flung a pillow at her. "You had sex with him."

"He was actually pretty good Haley. You should have had go before deciding you were immune to him romantically."

"Then we would have had sex with the same guy and I love you Brooke, but that's one thing I never wanna share with you."

"Touché, Tutormom." Brooke flung the pillow back at her.

Catching it, she situated it behind her back. "Initial slime factor aside, Chris isn't such a bad guy though."

Staring at herself in the mirror, Haley couldn't believe what Brooke had turned her into. She looked like a slut, a sorta hot slut, but a slut nonetheless. Her dress, if you could call it that, was a slinky skintight blinding white number, with teeny tiny gold chain straps, that was so short she was pretty positive it would be impossible to even sit down for fear of giving everyone a free show.

Brooke has styled her hair in loose cascading curls and applied so much make-up that she could probably rival any hooker. Then to finish the look off were the five-inch stiletto heeled gold tone metallic sandals that were surely going to break her neck.

This wasn't her, but maybe that was a good thing. Being herself had only led her into a sea of pain. It was time for a fresh start, a new Haley, one that would always leave her heart at the door.

"In need of some liquid courage?" A sympathetic Brooke appeared in the doorway; a bottle of Patron in her left hand, a shot glass in the other.

Slipping on a yellow topaz bracelet and matching ring Haley nodded for Brooke to set it up.

Filling the glass to the brim, Brooke handed it to Haley and was taken back a bit when the tiny blonde tossed it back like a pro and indicated she wanted another.

"Woah, Hales slow down there. It's the guy's job to get you all liquored up."

The buzzing of the doorbell sounded around them and sent Haley into panic mode. "Brooke, I don't if I can do this," she confessed, her entire body now trembling.

Grabbing Haley by the shoulders Brooke managed to hold her still for five seconds. "It's been a year Haley. You need to go out and have fun and that is right up this guy's alley."

"And he's nothing like…" Haley's voice trailed off, she still couldn't bare to say his name.

Pushing Haley's hair back away from her face, Brooke smiled. "I promise he's nothing like you know who. He's a musician that will give you the best ego boost ever, not to mention he could pop your cherry."

Stepping away from Brooke, Haley picked up her gold clutch. "I hate to break it to you Brooke, but you know who already did a thorough job of that."

Brooke gave her a teasing grin. "True, however, after a year of no customers, I would assume it closed up shop and used your re-grown hymen as a no trespassing sign"

"Nice mental image there, Tigger."

"I do what I can. Now, smile, stick your chest out, and if there is a God in heaven spread you legs. A strings free roll in the hay will do wonders for you, I promise."

"You are so damn smokin'," Chris murmured into her ear as they sat with his arm around her in a cozy booth at a posh New York hotspot.

She giggled, as she finished off her fifth Manhattan. Maybe she was wrong all those years and you actually do need alcohol to have fun. Because the more she drank the more the past become a fuzzy memory…well everything became fuzzy actually, but what mattered was that she was having fun on the first date she'd had since high school

Unfortunately, she never needed any help enjoying herself with Nathan. The way he looked at her and touched her had always been enough, even from the very start. Just a brush of his hand could fill her with a rush of excitement that no amount of alcohol could match.

With Chris though, his touch was beginning to repel her and while the way he looked at her definitely made her feel wanted, it also made her feel worthless, like her body was the only asset he was interested in and sadly it most likely was. So she drank and drank until she could feel nothing but the alcohol coursing through her blood stream.

"What do you say we get out of here?" He leered at her once more.

Struggling to get to her feet, she patted him on the cheek. "Let's go Keller."

Feeling her back hit Chris's mattress, she fought through her drunk haze to feel some sort of ecstasy as he began to kiss his way down her neck to the tops of her breasts. Yet, the only thing she started to feel was contempt for what she was doing.

With a hard shove, she sent Chris tumbling off the side of the bed. "Oh I'm so sorry," she tried to apologize, although hysterically laughing at his shocked expression kind of voided it out.

Joining her laughter, he pulled himself back on the bed, laying down flat on his back beside her with his hands behind his head.

"So, who's the guy?" he begrudgingly asked, once they both had quieted down.

Turning on her side, she looked over at him. "How did you know?"

With a knowing grin, he turned his head just enough to meet her eyes. "No one can pass up drunk sex with Chris Keller unless there's someone else. Of course usually when there is it turns into revenge sex, but I can tell you're not that type of a girl, which doesn't bode well for me getting laid tonight."

"How can you tell I'm not? I'm dressed like a tramp, I drank more than you and I let you take me back to your place on our first date."

He thought about his answer for the briefest of moments. "Because even in that outfit you're still the girl that every man longs to have in his bed, with or without sex. The kind musicians like me spend our whole lives chasing and writing songs about. And nine times out of ten your heart always belongs to another."

A shy smile graced her lips. "You know you're pretty sweet when you lay off the third person talk every other sentence."

"Let's just say I've been where you are."

"What was her name?" Haley quietly asked; sobering up a tad from the direction their conversation was taking.

"Samantha. We broke up on my 21st birthday, the same night I got the call to go out on my first tour. I didn't think she could handle life on the road and come to find out I was the one that couldn't handle it without her. How that's for irony?"

"Did you ever tell her?"

He let out a long sigh. "I went to tell her and she clinically informed me it was too late. She was getting married to some dependable run of the meal guy and three weeks pregnant with his fucking kid."

Tears welled in Haley's eyes. "That's horrible."

"You know, I've never told anyone this, but I watched her get married. I guess I had to see it for myself to really believe it was happening."

"Did she know you were there?"

Indifference washed over him. "No and it was better that way," he stated simply and Haley figured that was as much as he was going to talk about it.

"So who's your demon, James? I at least need a name if I'm going to justify not getting any."

"Nathan Scott. God, I think that's the first time I've said his name out loud in a year," she mused, amazed at how her heart still skipped at beat at saying his name. Sometimes she wondered if there would ever come a time when her head would catch up with her heart.

"If it took you a year just to say his name and for that matter go out on a date, I think you need to find a new way to cope sugar."

She rolled away from him, onto her back. "Care to fill me in on how you tamed you demon then?

"Luckily for you, Brooke gave me your demo and it's easy to see your music and your soul are one and the same, as should be the case with any musician worth their salt. So, the answer is pretty damn simple. Use the pain to fuel your music James, and you'll heal…trust me."

And she had done just that. Wrote song after song, until every fracture of her heart could be found in her music.

Following his advice had not only helped her heal and actually date again; it had jump-started her career with Maverick. Chris had used three of her songs on his debut album with them and from then on she'd been one of their golden writers.

Nevertheless, what she'd always remember about that night, more than her personal breakthroughs, was that there was a real human being inside Chris Keller, one that would become a dear friend.

"All right Hales," Peyton started, moving Haley's feet off the couch, then setting them on top of her lap when she sat down. "When are you going to tell him?"

Grabbing a pillow, that had falling to the floor, Haley covered her face with it. "I don't wanna talk about it," came her muffled response.

Yanking the pillow off her face, Peyton tossed it to Brooke who had sat down on the floor in front of them. "Sorry James, I saw you naked today and there's no way you are going to be able to hide that belly for more than another week or two."

"She's right," Brooke conceded, not too happy about the idea of Nathan knowing, yet aware that it could only be held off for so long.

Haley kicked her feet slightly, in a silent plea for Peyton to take her boots off. "I don't know…I can't count the number of times I've opened my mouth to tell him and I couldn't, I literally could not form the words. Why do I have such a block about this?"

"Maybe because he wasn't there the first time," Brooke snit, Peyton shooting her a death glare a beat later as she took Haley's boots off.

"He didn't even know about it, not that I'm sure it would a made a difference, but I can't hold something against him when he never had the chance to have an opinion either way," Haley defended him, something she had found herself doing a lot of lately where Brooke was concerned.

While Brooke was amazingly supportive and keyed up about the pregnancy, her hatred for Nathan had suddenly increased again. It had never bothered Haley before, but somehow carrying his baby had instilled a primitive instinct to protect him where their child was concerned.

She never wanted her son or daughter to be ashamed of who their father was. Not when, in her heart, she knew Nathan was going to be a remarkable one. His relationship with their child should never be tainted by the mistakes he made with her.

With a final dismissive scoff, Brooke dropped the attitude, remembering her promise to be nice for the baby. Sure, it may kill her, but it was worth it for Babycakes.

"Do you think I could just wait and have the baby tell him?" Haley hopefully glanced between her two friends.

Peyton tapped her chin, in mock thought. "Hmm, while Nathan isn't the brightest crayon in the box, I think he'd figure it out by then."

"He's already noticed the boobs." Haley divulged, becoming more and more aware that they were right—she didn't have much time.

The Next Morning…

"Grande Caramel Frappuccino," Lucas ordered from the sixteen-year old boy behind the Starbucks counter while taking a ten-dollar bill out of his wallet.

"Kind of a frilly drink man," someone commented over his shoulder.

Getting his change, Lucas turned to find that singer, Keller, before him. "Says the man in the rhinestone shirt."

Chris pointed his finger at him. "I'll give you that." He paused to order his own drink, then faced Lucas again. "So, you're Scott, right?

"Yeah and Keller, is it?"

Chris extended his hand. "The one and only."

Shaking his hand, Lucas eyed him warningly. He wasn't sure what to make of this guy yet.

"Well, listen Scott, I like to believe in fate and I think running into you here is a sign. Having said that, just so you know Haley, Brooke and Peyton are my heart," he held his hand to his chest, "and I wouldn't do this unless I loved their diva asses."

"What are getting at?" Lucas interrupted, needing him to get to the point. He was already twenty minutes late

Chris wasn't amused at the brush off. "You know what, never mind. Tell, the girls I'll call them from the road."

"I will." Lucas agreed, not giving him a second glance.

Right as Chris's hand touched the door to leave, his conscience intervened, causing him to do an about face and set his sights on Haley's baby daddy once more. 'Who was he to stand in the way of true love anyway?' "Hey, Scott!"

Lucas turned back to him.

"Congratulations you're gonna be a dad."

With those parting words Chris Keller's work was done before Lucas Scott's coffee cup even hit the floor.

Lying on her bed, naked, Haley rubbed a combination of cocoa butter and overpriced stretch mark prevention cream, all over her stomach and breasts, something Brooke insisted she do every night before she went to bed and every morning after her shower.

Stretch marks were the "enemy", according to Brooke, and they were going to fight them, no matter what the cost.

That girl never ceased to amaze her.

Shouting from the other room, interrupted Haley's tranquil state and sent her scrambling for her robe. Securing it around her body, she raced out of room to find Lucas and Brooke in a heated argument, with Lucas down on one knee and Brooke hopping mad in front of him.

"Brooke it's all right. I know everything. You don't have to deny it. I'm happy about it, I promise. I love you Brooke Davis and I love our child already," Lucas swore and if he hadn't been completely off base it would have been a very touching moment.

Brooke rolled her eyes. "Jesus, Lucas I told you there is no baby and what makes you think I'd ever accept a proposal from you, especially without a ring?"

"I didn't have time. As soon as Chris let me in on the news, I raced right over here to be with you."

"Chris," Brooke ground out, already plotting his death. Only Chris Keller could make such a colossal mistake.

Haley couldn't keep quiet a second longer, the hopefully look on Lucas's face broke her heart.

"Lucas, it's not Brooke."

Brooke and Lucas whipped their heads around at the sound of her voice, not aware they had an audience.

"Haley, don't," Brooke tried to intervene.

Putting her hand up to stop Brooke, Haley carried on with her confession. "It's me Lucas, I'm pregnant and have been for awhile."

She helplessly watched a flood of emotion flash in his eyes; the prominent one being betrayal, just as it had in Brooke's.

Hiding the truth had done nothing but hurt the ones she loved and she had finally come to understand her silence was hurting her child as well. She only had one choice—to tell Nathan the truth and to do it now.


Cath