Bella's POV
I needed to think.
I needed to think long and hard.
You don't need to think. You know how you feel. You love that bloodsucker in there.
'NO I DON'T!!!' I mentally shouted.
Did I? Did I have any feelings for Edward.
Yes-
'NO, NO, NEVER!!!!!!!'
You can't deny it.
'Oh yeah, watch me.'
Oh god, I'm pathetic. I'm having a mental debate, with my conscience!
I don't like him, I don't like him. I. DO. NOT. LIKE. EDWARD.
Mm-hmm, just keep telling yourself that.
'Oh shut the hell up'
I suddenly felt a lot like Meg.
The girl in Hercules.
And that stupid song she sings.
And then, right on cue, it pops in and is stuck.
But my conscience decided to have fun and sing along at her appropriate parts.
Me
Conscience
If there's a prize for rotten judgment
I guess I've already won that
No man is worth the aggravation
That's ancient history,
Been there, done that
Cue the annoying voice in my head.
Who'd'ya think you're kiddin'
He's the Earth and heaven to you
Try to keep it hidden
Honey, I can see right through you
Girl, ya can't conceal it
I know how ya feel and
Who you're thinking of
No chance, no way
I won't say it, no, no
You swoon, you sigh
why deny it, uh-oh?
It's too cliché
I won't say I'm in love
I thought my heart had learned its lesson
It feels so good when you start out
My head is screaming get a grip, girl
Unless you're dying to cry your heart out
Oh
You keep on denying
Who you are and how you're feeling
Baby, I'm not buying
Hon, I saw ya hit the ceiling
Face it like a grown-up
When ya gonna own up
That ya got, got, got it bad
No chance, no way
I won't say it, no, no
Give up, give in
Check that grin you're in love
This scene won't play,
I won't say I'm in love
You're doin' flips read my lips
You're in love
(Shoo doo, shoo doo)
You're way off base
I won't say it
(She wont say it)
Get off my case
(Shut Up, shut up)
I won't say it
Girl, don't be proud
It's okay you're in love
Oh
At least out loud,
I won't say I'm in love
I lightly sighed, too low for Edward to hear if he were still in my room.
And you know what? This song is true. You love him, but you won't ad-
'No I don't! So shut the fuck up!' I mentally screamed.
What was annoying was that it was right. The song was true for me.
Geez, someone woke up on the wrong side of the Edward.
'You know, you're really annoying the shit out of me'
Happy to help.
'Do you enjoy tormenting me?'
About stuff like this, yes. You love him girl!
'Why can't you leave me alone? Don't you have other conscience buddies you can annoy?'
Nope, I'm allllllllllllll yours
'Great'
I know isn't it?!?!
I rolled my eyes.
This shower wasn't helping.
I quickly finished and stepped out.
Luckily I had remembered to grab clothes from my room to change into so I wouldn't have to go looking in my room just in case Edward was still there.
Yes, because we wouldn't want him to see us naked, now would we?
Catch the sarcasm?
I quickly dried my hair and entered my room.
Edward was waiting.
Is it just you, or did the temperature just rise 10 degrees in here?
'Ha! That's ironic and stupid! Vampires are cold, not hot. So instead of heating up the room he would freeze it!'
You know what I mean.
"Bella." Edward said coming closer.
"Edward?"
"Yes love?"
Aww, he called you love! Don't do this!!!! Just let go of the past and grab hold of the future you selfish bitch!
'Wow, I didn't know a conscience could cuss.'
"I'm not sure about this." I said.
"About what love?"
He looked generally concerned. But he was a vampire, they were superior liars and actors.
You selfish jackass! This'll kill him!!!!!!!
"About all of this. You, me, us. I'm still fucking skittish around vampires! I'm just not sure how I feel about you. I need to be alone for a while. I need to think."
"Whatever you wish, love." he said before swiftly exciting through my window.
How could you do that? To him, to fucking us! You need him! Did you see the hurt in his eyes as he left??!?!?
'Of course I saw! They're my eyes, REMEMBER?!!?!?'
How could you? You realize I live off of your emotions right? When you're happy I'm happy, when you're excited I'm excited, and damn it if you're depressed than so am I! I don't like being depressed!! And I don't have to be a psychic to know that without him you'll become as fucking depressed as you've ever been!!!!! Besides, how will you be able to talk to him, or any of the Cullens?
'That's simple, I won't. I refuse to socialize with them from now on. I won't let them close to me just to be shattered again.'
Yeah, sure. Let me know how that works out for you. All you're doing is digging a deeper grave for yourself.
'Oh shut up!'
I thought people were suppose to listen to their conscience? You know, it's the voice OF REASON in your head.
'Not when it's being crazy.'
You're pointless.
'Does that mean you'll leave me alone?'
You'd love that, wouldn't you? I'm here to stay Bella.
'Great, just perfect.'
Edward's POV
When Bella and I kissed, I felt on top of the world.
But now after everything was said and done, I felt like shit.
She needed to be alone, she needed to think.
What the hell does that mean??!?!?!?
Life is so complicated when you don't actually live.
She said she wasn't sure how she felt about me, but I was damn sure about how I feel about her.
But even if it means waiting another 100 years, I shall sit and wait for my Bella.
I quickly got home.
But before entering the house, I did my best to make myself feel happy.
Jasper would be able to tell I was down and ask why.
Either that or Alice saw this coming and already told everyone.
But I wasn't taking chances.
I quietly came in.
Hey Edward! Not to be pushy or anything, but school starts in 15 minutes!!!!!!-Alice
She hadn't seen anything.
I felt relief flow through my body.
Why are you relieved about school?-Jasper.
I chuckled on the inside and made my way to my room.
So far so good. No one had any idea what kind of a morning I had had.
Hey guys! I know, kinda short, DO NOT KILL ME FOR THIS CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!! I understand most will be upset for what I did with Edward and Bella, but I have a master plan. So if you'll just BE PATIENT, everything will work out… or will it? I know, I'm evil. Another evil thing I am doing is this: I have noticed that I have A LOT more people reading the story than I do commenting. SO, if I don't get 90 COMMENTS, I will PERMANETLY END THE SERIES. P.S. If you kill me, it will do the series no good being the fact that I am the author.
