**I DO NOT OWN OR CLAIM TO OWN GLEE OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS ALL THAT BELONGS TO RYAN MURPHY**
All If Any Mistakes Are My Own I Apologize In Advanced.
Author's Note:- Three Updates In 1 Week, 2 On The Same Day I'm On A Roll Again Hope This Is Ok I Didn't Write Any Smut Because I'd Probably Be No Good At It But I've Written Their Feelings About It I Hope It's Ok I Freak About Writing Because Although I've Loved It I'm Still Pretty New At It.
Should I Continue With More Drama & Stuff Or Just Leave It There?
Let Me Know Please I Love Feedback. Thank You.
12. CHAPTER TWELVE
Waking up the next morning after spending most of the night with Finn making love for the first time she could feel the change of losing her virginity to the man she loved more than anything in the world sure she'd heard people talk about it and she had, had that talk with the girls in Glee club last year but none of them had told her that she would feel so amazing and alive which soothed her fear that maybe she hadn't been ready but she could tell right afterwards that she had been more than ready to give her virginity to Finn it was always supposed to be his. She wished she could have woken up next to him instead of alone but he had to leave before Rachel's Daddy came home from work and caught them in bed together; she didn't think it would end well for Finn if he'd stayed but she was happy all the same, but the feeling faltered when she remembered what she had to do in less than two hours time.
The first thing she needed to do before Noah arrived was bathe to try and ease the sore area between her legs after her first time then she was going to end her relationship with Noah so she could be with Finn. It upset her to think that she had experienced an act of pure love the night before while she was still in a relationship with someone else and that kind of shadowed her happiness because she did feel guilty and it was more intense than bad feeling she had felt before but she knew that if she had given her virginity to Noah it wouldn't have felt at right as it did with Finn and that she was sure of.
She wasn't about to tell Noah what happened with her and Finn last night but she was just going to tell him she couldn't be with him, that was all she had been able to come up with so far she hoped the rest would come at the time. She and Finn had decided that they would keep their reconciliation a secret for a little while not to cause any argument's or fights before Nationals at least so they only had to hide it for a little over a week she knew that was a short amount of time but right after Nationals there was only three days of school left before they ended for the summer so Noah would have 3 months to process the information before school started back up for their Senior year.
The two hours had passed by quickly and before she knew it Noah was knocking on her bedroom door before walking into the room she turned from the mirror at her vanity table after she finished fixing up her hair, she smiled a small smile at him briefly when he went to kiss her lips she turned her face slightly so he'd catch her cheek with his lips he pulled back right after with a frown on his face as he looked her over.
"Hey baby, is everything okay?" he asked concern and worry laced his voice which cause her heart to skip a beat and not in a good way she looked down for a moment before she took his hand and led him to her bed so he could sit down which he did not taking his eyes off her see could see the worry all over his face, and she began to speak.
"...Noah...we have to talk...before I say anything more though I need you to know that I really do care about you ok...but I think we should break up" she said not wanting to drag it out any more than it needed to so she just told him straight up, the look on his face of hurt and sadness was an expression she'd never get out of her head and it made the guilt of last night really kick in and she could feel herself tearing up slightly.
Noah didn't say anything for a really long time he just stared at her his first expression of hurt and sadness gone now transformed into shock and disbelief. "Ex-..Excuse me? You're breaking up with me? Just like that?...Wait what's changed?" he asked her his voice low but strong as he spoke asking her questions which he deserved the answer's too but she couldn't tell him the entire truth.
"...Yes I'm breaking up with you...I really care for you and you have been an amazing boyfriend to me to the point where I believe you can do better...-you can do better than someone who can't give you their entire heart, soul and body..." she told him letting the tears fall, she quickly lifted her hands so she could wipe them away with her finger tips.
"Wait...you're breaking up with me for Finn aren't you?!" he asked her his voice raising in anger and she just managed to shake her head.
"N-...Noah I'm breaking up with you because I'm not sure I'm entirely over Finn not because we're back together because were not... I just think that you deserve to be with a girl who can love you with everything they have...I'm just not that girl...I'm so sorry..." she said only half of it was the truth but she couldn't tell him that and hurt him anymore than she already had he stood up from where he sat on her bed and looked right at her for a moment she thought he could see right through her half truths but then he closed his eyes swallowing hard she thought maybe it was so he wouldn't begin to cry that wasn't acceptable for him as far as he was concerned he's 'a man and men didn't cry it made them weak' she remembers him telling her once.
"I cannot believe that you're breaking up with me!" he emphasized on the words 'You're' and 'Me' like he couldn't believe that I was the one ending a relationship with him. Hearing this in his voice really made her angry now to the point where her tears weren't falling anymore she had already told him that he could do better did he have to make her feel worse about herself by the way he said that sentence she scowled looking at him with her hands on her hips.
"Well believe it because it's happening and I would appreciate it if you would leave now. I don't appreciate your tone of voice or your attitude for that matter. We are over Noah I'm sorry but I'll see you at school and I hope we can remain friends." She says her voice strong and her tears gone but her eyes still blood shot from crying again she had cried so much this past year that her all tears she had shed would probably fill a large swimming pool so she decided she wouldn't cry for the rest of this school year at least.
Noah looked at her shaking his head, it was obvious that he was pissed off over this turn of events he hadn't expected this when he woke up today. "Whatever Rachel, can you blame me for being pissed off over this I hadn't even gotten into your pants, and I did a tone of sappy shit to try and sway you and nothing I get why Finn had to go to Santana for a little satisfaction, you're a tease and a prude!" he snapped at her before he stormed out. So much for not crying again this school year; the moment he left the room she broke down in tears, she knew he was acting out trying to hit her where it really hurt because she had hurt him but still that was a complete 180 from the guy why sang to her in front of the school then asked her to go to prom.
She sat on her bed curling her knees up to her chest while lying on her right side with her arms folder around her curled up knees crying into them, she stayed like the for a good few hours not answering any phone calls or texts which were becoming more frequent the more she ignored them she just didn't want to talk to anyone she stayed there for the rest of the day until she eventually fell asleep blocking out her phone completely.
Finn had been freaking out over the fact that he'd been calling and texting Rachel all day and night Sunday and the only reason he didn't show up at her house was that his Mom and Burt wanted to do family day with him and Kurt and he couldn't get away not even for an hour to check on her so right now worried was an understatement all kinds of things ran through his head:
Had she changed her mind?
Had he not been good?
Had she woken up regretting Saturday night?
Had she spent the day with Puck doing the same thing as they had the night before?
He hadn't gotten any sleep at all that night the only comfort he had was knowing that his questions would be answered in school first thing tomorrow...but was he sure he wanted to know the answer to any of those questions as far as he was concerned they had made love, it was amazing and they were officially back together or at least that is how they had left things when he left her house Saturday.
He got up earlier than normal on Monday morning because he hadn't had no sleep the only up side to insomnia, and he got to school an hour before all the other students well other than Rachel she was always there earlier than everyone else he pulled up and was so relieved to see her car parked in the parking lot and she was sat inside her car, so he parked his truck and jumped out locking up for the day before he ran to her car knocking on the window noticing how she jumped literally out of her seat because he'd scared her, she looked at him with a frown as she pointed for him to get the passenger side of her car which he did quickly he closed the door once he squeezed his long body inside her tiny car he turned towards her as much as he could as she did the same with no problems since she fit perfectly in the car since she was more than a foot shorter and smaller in general than him physically.
"Hey you okay? I've been worrying like crazy about you... You never called me after..." he left the sentence unspoken since she knew what he meant, she looked down for a moment and his heart felt like it dropped into his stomach as he thought to himself '...She regrets it...'
"I'm so sorry Finn...I should have called you but after talking to Noah yesterday I was just way to emotionally drained and I passed out until this morning..." she said to him in a low voice as she looked back up to him she knew that look he thought she was regretting what they did and she quickly leaned forward to kiss his lips softly to reassure him that she wanted him and only him
He responded to her kiss after the initial shock had worn off but when she pulled back he needed to hear her say she didn't regret it, "Y-..You don't r-regret it do you?" he managed to stutter out nervously keeping his eyes on hers a he spoke.
She immediately shook her head "No, No! Of course I don't. I love you Finn...I'm so sorry for answering your calls or texts its just... Noah upset me...Sure I deserved it but still...what he said is still a really touchy subject especially after what we did on Saturday..." she said assuming Finn would guess what she meant but Finn was clueless to what she meant, although he was pretty pissed off that Puck had upset her so badly with whatever he'd said that she had spent the day hiding out in her room not talking to anyone.
"What the hell did he say to you?!" Finn asked her angrily, not aimed at her and she knew that... she wondered if she should tell him but she if she and Finn were going to work out this time around they needed to be completely honest with one another no secrets ever.
"You have to promise me you won't go all crazy-Finn when you see him and attack him physically or vocally?" she asked him before she could tell him she needed him to promise her this.
He sighed wishing she hadn't asked him to make that promise it was going to be so hard to say nothing to the dick who upset HIS GIRLFRIEND he couldn't help but think how nice it was too call her that again but he quickly snapped out of it before nodding "I promise" he said.
She smiled slightly nodded a thanks before she began to tell him everything that she said to Noah and everything Noah had said to her not leaving anything out and Finn could feel his blood boil at everything Puck had said to her whether it was hurtful to Rachel or now he just wanted to beat the crap out of him but he'd made a promise so instead just tightened his hands into fists tightly counting to ten to try and calm down before he said anything else to her not wanting to upset.
He then felt her grasp one of his fists with hand she wrapped her hand around his causing him to relax he loosened the first so he could lace his fingers with hers before he pulled her hand to his mouth placing a kiss on the back of her palm before he looked into her eyes.
"Rachel he was just being a dick, you know that right? I never slept with anyone while I was dating you... the stupid non-thing that happened with Santana doesn't count in my mind because It meant nothing. It was the worst experience of my life but with you on Saturday...Meant everything to me...It was amazing, perfect and I have never felt that kind of happiness, I've never felt so clear minded it's like everything is finally in its right place for me now because I have you."
He told her honestly he had never been good with words but so he hoped she understood how much what happened between them meant to him and he hoped it meant as much to her too.
She understood of course she always understood Finn but it made her feel a thousand times better to have heard him express it in words.
"I know exactly what you mean...because I felt it all too..." She told him smiling slightly glad to finally feel like things were finally falling into place for them.
Rachel leaned in kissing Finn deeply their mouths moving unison as they kissed passionately and freely, just them no baggage. They made out in Rachel's car until the first car drove into the school parking lot, which was the push they needed to finally pull apart from the make out session so the could get ready to start the school day.
