Chapter 12
"I'm not sure you do, Dean." Fergus said. "You have a chance of getting out of here. I can help you with that, get you a place to live…a job. But, I can't do that if you continue to talk like this, Dean." He paused. "You can't leave here talking about going to make believe places with a brother who passed years ago." Fergus shook his head. "Do you understand…?"
Dean nodded. "I do. I get it."
"I hope so, Dean. I really do." Fergus said, then he stood and walked away.
Dean sat on the bench for a long while. He had options. Probably not in the traditional sense. Not to those whose life was outside the gates of this place. But, he had options. And he needed to choose what was going to be his life. He needed to choose, quick, before someone else chose for him.
SPN SPN SPN SPN SPN
Missouri could see a difference in her favorite patient almost immediately.
"You haven't talked about Sam, your brother, for a few weeks." Missouri said. She was hoping that the leading statements would get Dean to talk.
"No, I haven't."
"Care to tell me why you stopped?" Missouri asked.
"Why I stopped being crazy?" Dean shot back.
"Why you stopped talking about Sam." Missouri clarified.
"I will have to refer you back to my previous statement."
"Dean!"
"Talking about Sam means I'm crazy, right?" Dean stated. "That's the impression I got from Dr. McLeod. So, I stop talking about Sam, I'm healed. Isn't that how it works?"
"You were never crazy, Dean." Missouri stated. "You were not brought here for that reason. You were brought here because you were a traumatized little boy. You stayed because we could find no close family. Adoption and fostering wasn't an option for you."
"Why is Fergus talking….? Dean shook his head. "I can't live outside this place. I've never had a job in my life. I don't know how…."
"We've taught you a lot. And we are not going to just throw you out into the big bad world. We are going to, as Dr. McLeod told you, find you a place to live and a job. And we are going to help you manage your money. We will help you with shopping for your food, clothing, and whatever else you need. Somebody will be checking in with you, daily, for awhile. If you need somebody to walk with you through the market to buy things, if you need somebody to…."
Dean shaking his head stopped her. "It's…it's too much. It's just too much."
"There is a phrase for what you are feeling, Dean. It's called being institutionalized. And it's living in a place and becoming so dependent on what the place provides that you don't think you can survive, once you leave the place."
Dean looked at her, tears in his eyes. "I can't survive outside these walls. Don't you get that?"
"Oh, Darlin'." Missouri replied seeing his distress. "It's going to be okay. You're scared, Baby. That's natural, you don't know what is ahead for you. You are going into something you don't know anything about. But, Dean, we will be there. I promise."
SPN SPN SPN SPN SPN
"I don't know, Doctor. I talked to him for a while last night. I even came back and checked on him before I left for the evening. He…he seemed fine." Missouri shook her head. S
Missouri had no idea how it happened. She had no idea how Dean had gotten into the locked medicine cabinet located at the nurses' station on the floor where he lived. They had no idea how much he had taken. They didn't know, at the time, even what he had taken. It took a blood test to figure that out. He had knocked all the bottles out of the cabinet. They lay, scattered on the floor. The nurses scrambled back to the station, realizing their mistake of leaving it unattended, for even the briefest of moments.
They found Dean lying on the floor, unconscious and unresponsive.
TBC
END NOTE: There is one more chapter to come. I'm sorry, you guys, that I have kept you waiting so long for the next chapter. Also, just so you know, you might be surprised by the way I end it. That is if the plot bunnies stay on their little rabbit trail. But, you never know with plot bunnies. JL
