A/N I would like to thank Chaeli for reviewing the last chapter. I hope I can get more on this chapter.
The past week had been quite draining on Harry seeing as how he was having nightmares every single night. He hadn't had this many even in the hospital while he had been stuck there. He couldn't understand the meaning behind them or why he was having so many. It was as if being in this house was causing them to occur. But why was the question that plagued his mind everyday and that worried him. He just wished that he could understand if they were just random nightmares or possibly parts of his memory returning.
If they were the latter he didn't want to know. They were too horrid, to depressing and just plain scary he would tell himself. No they couldn't be memories he would think as if he said it enough then it would be true.
Last night he had awakened once again screaming and shaking from yet another one. This one was just as horrid as before.
Dream
"I don't know what you think you are doing boy, but I have told you I will not put up with your freakiness."
A huge burly man shouted at a small dark haired boy as he hauled him through the house by his collar. The man's face looked like a cross between a bright purple plum and a red apple.
"But I didn't do anything. I swear uncle," the boy whined as he was dragged across the hard floor.
"You are nothing but a liar! We took you in out of the graciousness of our hearts and this is how you repay us. You use your freakiness to hurt my son. How dare you misbehave," the man screamed as spittle came out of his mouth.
"I swear I didn't do anything," the boy again whined.
The man stopped dragging the boy once he reached a door underneath the stairs. He quickly opened it and only darkness was visible.
"You will stay in there until I see fit to let you out. That means no food and no water. I will not have you going around using your freakiness whenever you want to," the man sneered as he roughly shoved the small boy in to the darkened room.
End of Dream
Harry had sat bolt upright screaming no as he shook violently. He soon found himself in Draco's comforting arms. He could hear the blond man telling him that everything would be all right and other soothing words.
It had been like this since the first night that he had been in this house. He'd go to sleep only to wake up from a nightmare and Draco right there to hold him and comfort him. It would take him quite awhile to calm down enough so that he could go back to sleep and also trying to avoid telling Draco about them.
The dreams were disturbing and causing him to slowly fall into depression. He would never speak about them only to tell Draco that he couldn't actually remember what they were about, except that he did remember. He remembered everything about the nightmare and that is what scared him the most. They just couldn't be real is what he would tell himself.
Draco was beginning to get extremely concerned about Harry's nightly nightmare. It was beginning to throw him off from his nightly sleep. Sleep that he needed badly if he was going to take care of both Harry and Emily in the way that they needed him. He was also getting extremely frustrated that Harry refused to speak about them. Oh he knew or at least had pretty good guess that Harry remembered his nightmares. But it wasn't that knowledge or even an educated guess that frustrated him, no it was the fact that Harry would lie to him about them and refused to say anything regarding what they were about.
He was truly beginning to wonder if he could handle this. He had always been a strong person on the outside. Giving the appearance of a very strong willed, determined man but that was far from the truth. The truth was that inside he was just like anyone else with fears and insecurities. It had taken a lot for him to slowly open up to Harry when they were in the middle of their sixth year at Hogwarts. He had been raised never to show his emotions as they were a sign of weakness, but that had slowly changed when he decided that he wanted to go out with Harry.
Harry had been the stronger of the two. Always there for his friends, helping them with whatever problem they had. All the while keeping as much of his own problems locked away, hidden from the world as they didn't matter as much as others did. But now it was the other way around and Harry needed him to be strong like he had used to be. However he wasn't so sure if he could do that.
This train of thought had brought him back to the first night that Harry had come home. He had felt so weak and useless as he sat there trying to comfort his love from an awful nightmare. A nightmare that he was pretty certain was a small memory returning.
Later that night he had been in their bedroom crying when Emily had come wandering in. He was so grateful for the little girl who was so loving and tender. He had tried to put on a brave face for her, not wanting her to know anything about what was happening with her other father. But somehow she seemed to know, just like she always knew things. He then remembered her parting words that everything would be okay. He could only hope that it was true.
Currently the three members of the house were sitting around the small dinning room table enjoying their breakfast. Emily was trying to be as neat as possible for a child of her age and not get her porridge all over the place. Harry was nibbling on a piece of toast, his green eyes were darker then usual and he appeared to be in a haze, possibly lost in some thought. Draco meanwhile was just sitting there quietly watching the rest of his family as he tried to get a grip on his emotions, especially his fear about being able to handle what was happening and what inevitably would.
"Um Draco can I ask you something," Harry suddenly asked his voice quivering with uncertainty.
"Of course Harry, you can ask me anything," Draco replied as he took a sip of his tea.
"Well, it's just; I mean I was wandering if you could tell me more about my past. I mean you've told me a lot but I get the feeling that you haven't told me everything," Harry asked his voice now full of uncertainty.
This brought Draco up short. His face had a look of pure shock on it and it looked as if he had paled considerably. This was definitely not what he had expected Harry to ask him. It wasn't that it would never come up, but he thought that it would come up later.
He had of course told Harry about his life prior to waking up in the hospital, but had glossed over many of the more horrible and terrifying aspects. At the time he like the healers didn't believe that Harry was ready to hear about all of that. Mainly they were unsure of how he would handle it.
Most of the time when he'd had a nightmare or what turned out to be a memory when he would talk about them was mostly about the dark times in his life. This had startled Draco and the others because they had believed he would also have memories returning of good times, times that we filled with love and fun. However, that had yet to happen and it worried Draco.
Draco couldn't help but think back to a wonderful and rather eventful night in the Astronomy tower during the holidays of their sixth year.
Flashback
It was nearing midnight and Draco was currently sitting on one of the window sills in the tower awaiting the arrival of his love, Harry Potter. He was currently swinging his legs over the edge not worried that he could fall out since he was aware that there were spells on it to protect these things from happening. Giving a slight shiver from the cold air, he pulled his dark green cloak tighter as he wasn't thrilled in getting a cold.
He was currently lost in thoughts about Harry. He had of course known quite a bit about his boyfriend's home life. They had talked many times about those kinds of things. Hell, he had told Harry a lot about his own home life and growing up in the Malfoy family. However, he couldn't help but suspect that many things were being kept from him. After all, he knew that he was doing the same thing, afraid to tell the other about every in its entirety because they didn't want to lose the other one as they had slowly been falling in love with one another over the past several months. Well, at least he was doing this and suspected that Harry had been doing the same.
He was trying to decide if he should just toss his irrational fear away knowing that it was just a weakness and as he was a Malfoy wasn't supposed to show and weaknesses. Still at the same time he wasn't sure if he could that, not after Harry was starting to show him that weaknesses were okay, that they were just a part of who you were.
It was at this thought he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. Since he had been such deep thought, he jumped nearly three feet in the air and screamed like a girl. He heard the unmistakable laugh of Harry as he turned around to see only his boyfriend's head and the laughing smile that was plastered on his face.
"Merlin Harry, please don't do that. You nearly gave me a heart attack,' Draco chastised.
"I'm sorry Draco but I couldn't resist,' Harry said still laughing as he sat down beside him.
"It's a little cold up here isn't," Harry replied absentmindedly as he pulled his cloak tighter and placed his left arm around Draco.
"Yes, yes it is but you know as well as I do it's the safest place for us to meet. It's not like we can be seen together by anyone without causing more problems.'
"I know but I just wish we could,' Harry said with a sigh.
"Well until I get the strength to actually turn on my father I can't do that. You know as well as I do that he would kill me or allow the Dark Lord too,' Draco said sounding sad.
"Then we will just have to wait until the time comes. But I am afraid that it will come before we want it too. You know Ron and Hermione are beginning to get suspicious as to why I keep disappearing at night."
"I know the Weasel and the Mud—Granger would be by now. It seems as if they are desperately trying to keep a hold of you as if you were some kind of animal."
Harry laughed at this comment. "Well, until we decide to tell them and everyone else they will continue to be suspicious. But you know it is kind of nice to have people worry about me. I mean well I didn't really have a good," and with that said Harry drifted off into silence.
Draco noticed this right away. And now his suspicions were true, Harry was keeping secrets. A part of him was upset that secrets were being kept from him, especially since he hated that and had told Harry this before. However, there was another part that seemed almost understanding and saddened that this was happening.
He quickly made a rash decision, one that would have been worthy of a Gryffindor. "Harry, I know that you haven't been telling me everything about you life with your Aunt and Uncle. I mean I know that you have said they don't like and all, but there is still something that you aren't saying. I would like you to tell me everything because I really like you a lot and would like to be there for you, but I can't if you don't open up about all of the things that you are dealing with,' Draco said softly as he turned to look at Harry in the face.
Harry dared not speak at the moment as he was to taken aback by Draco's revelation. Of course he knew that he was hiding things, things that he would rather never remember or ever have to talk about. As he mulled this over he soon came to the decision that he really should talk about it with someone. It wasn't like his friends hadn't been telling him that for awhile now. Still even though he had told them and Draco many things he had left many others out. He was too afraid that they would look at him just like his "so called" family does. And that was the one thing that he never wanted to have happen. These people so far cared and stood by him all of the time and knew that it would kill him if he were to lose them.
"Harry, please tell me everything. I would really like to know it all. It won't change how I feel about you,' Draco said as if he could understand Harry's thoughts.
Harry looked at Draco with glassy eyes as he just stared ahead almost like he didn't see the blond there.
"Hey I have an idea Harry. Since, we both feel so strongly about one another and I know that I haven't told everything I suggest we make a pact. A pact that says we will tell each other everything about the other no matter how bad it is and that it will always stay that way. We could even make it a magically binding contract if that would make you feel better."
"At that Harry slowly nodded his head before he began to speak. "Draco I will tell you everything but I don't think we need a contract. I mean if we really are going to try and make this work then I guess we should lay everything out on the table,' Harry said and saw the confusion on the other's face. "It's a muggle phrase that means we tell each other everything, that way there are no secrets."
Draco just gave him a small nod in understanding but his face still clearly said that he didn't understand.
"I guess I should go first,' Harry said as he took a deep calming breath to center himself for what he knew was going to be a long night. He just thanked whatever God was out there that it was a Sunday tomorrow and he didn't need to get up early
End of Flashback
Draco was quickly brought out of his memory when he heard Harry clearing his throat in order to gain his attention. He also heard his daughter giggle at this.
Looking up at Harry he steadied himself for whatever he was about to be asked. "What would you like to know Harry?"
"You've told me quite a few things about my life, like some of the things that happened when we were in school. You've also helped explain some of the nightmares that I have had as true memories, but you haven't really spoke about what my life was like before school. I mean do you know what it was like because I would really like to know,' Harry asked trying to keep any enthusiasm at of his voice.
"Yes Harry I do know about your life before Hogwarts. We sat many nights talking about it and what happened. But I don't know if I should tell you yet. I mean it's just that many unpleasant things happened in your childhood and I don't know if it would be wise at the present to tell you,' Draco said trying to stay calm and not let on that once again he was nervous, extremely nervous.
Harry was surprised at Draco's reply. For some unknown reason he thought that the blond who he believed was supposed to be his husband would tell him the truth and never dance around it. At this thought his mood changed and he began to get upset. He needed to know, he needed to understand if he were to ever heal fully.
"Draco some of the things may be unpleasant as you said, but I want to know. I have a right to know since I can't bloody well remember," Harry spoke through clenched teeth.
Draco gave a huge sigh of defeat and nodded his head in understanding. "Just please listen to me when I say its nit pleasant and that it doesn't change who you are. Also, please hear me out before you say anything."
With that said Draco began to tell him all about his life with the Dursleys. How he had lived in a small cupboard until he was eleven. How his cousin enjoyed beating on him and playing a game that he called Harry Hunting. He told him all about how they fed him very little and made him do all the chores around there home. He even went on to explain that they had called him freak all of the time and how he should have died along with his parents. The entire time Draco's voice was becoming emotional as tears were starting to flow from his eyes. This had been the one thing he had never wanted to do. He had made it a goal several years ago not to hurt Harry in anyway. But now he knew that he was doing just that, he was breaking his goal and oath that he had taken with himself. He had never told Harry about this but now it was clear to see with the look of anticipation mixed with fear. He really did not want to do this afraid of how Harry was going to react but he knew that he had no other choice.
"What would you like to know precisely,' Draco asked.
"I would like to know what my life was like before we met. I mean before I went to school. It's just, well I don't remember anything and you've told me many things about what our lives were like in school. But you have never tried to help me with my life before that and I was curious," Harry said lowering his down to the table. He could feel his pulse beginning to race and he wasn't sure why. He couldn't decide if it was from the possibilities of finally learning more about his lost past or maybe fear. All he knew was that he needed to know, especially with all of these nightmares that he was having.
Draco took a deep breath and slowly let it out as he tried to decide where he should start. There was no getting out of now and he knew it. Oh how he hated being backed into a corner and now he was in one. All he could hope for was that Harry, his love would not take it to hard.
"I guess I should start by explaining that you lived with your Aunt and Uncle until you were seventeen. They weren't the very nicest people you would ever want to meet. They seemed to almost take a perverse pleasure out of hurting,' Draco said. "Oh no they didn't physically hurt, like beating or anything like that, but they did hurt you," he quickly explained when he saw the look of horror cross over Harry's face.
"From what I understand for the first ten years that you lived with them you lived in a cupboard that was under the stairs. You were given very little food and expected to do all of the work around the house. It got a little better when you got your school letter because they moved up to a small bedroom. However, after he hated being backed into a corner and now he was in one. All he could hope for was that Harry, his love would not take it to hard.
"I guess I should start by explaining that you lived with your Aunt and Uncle until you were seventeen. They weren't the very nicest people you would ever want to meet. They seemed to almost take a perverse pleasure out of hurting,' Draco said. "Oh no they didn't physically hurt, like beating or anything like that, but they did hurt you," he quickly explained when he saw the look of horror cross over Harry's face.
"From what I understand for the first ten years that you lived with them you lived in a cupboard that was under the stairs. You were given very little food and expected to do all of the work around the house. It got a little better when you got your school letter because they moved up to a small bedroom. However, after you returned from your first year at school they put bas on your window and refused to allow you out. That is except to do the work around the house and cook their meals. You never had any real clothes because they refused to buy you any and only gave you your cousins old hand me downs. Another thing you weren't allowed to have any toys or even watch the television as you were a freak to them."
It was at the point anger and denial welled up inside of Harry. All his nightmares were true not just some form of normal type of nightmares that most people would have. Now they were indeed memories, memories of his horrid past and they were coming back to haunt him.
"No!"
"What," Draco asked a little surprised at the outburst.
"You are a liar," Harry screamed as he backed his wheelchair up slowly. Right now all he wanted to do was get away as fast as he could.
"Harry I am not a liar. I love you and would never do that to you," Draco said now realizing what was going on in Harry's mind and feeling utterly lost once again.
"Yes you are you are a liar. None of that happened. I don't know what you want with me but you are a liar," Harry shouted as he backed out of the room and moved as fast as he could towards his room.
Well here it is and I hope you liked it. Please review and let me know. Yes next chapter should be quite emotional if not more then this one.
