Hey guys! Sorry Chapter 12 was a little delayed. Been a busy week but here it is! I am also starting to work on Chapter 13. I have decided to incorporate my idea into this story, since it works perfectly with everything Johanna is going through. I hope you like it.
I really appreciate everyone that has added my story to their favorites and/or has been subscribing to me. Also want to thank my reviewers. Especially Ellenka who has really encouraged me to continue and reviews consistantly. Also, to theweekendsinner that consistantly reviews as well. You really keep me going! I really appreciate it!
It seems like my head barely hits the pillow when Evander starts wailing his demands for his midnight feeding.
I sigh and roll back out of bed.
I tread as quietly as I can across the room and make my way across the house to Evan's room.
"Shhhhh Evan, it's okay" I try to shush him as I lift him out of the crib.
I sit us in that kitchen chair that is still in Evan's room and latch him onto my breast.
I close my eyes while he eats. My head's still swimming a little bit.
I hum to him; more to try to keep myself awake than anything else.
It seems like an eternity but he finally finishes and I change him and put him back to bed.
I drag my feet back to our room and am out like a light.
When my eye lids flutter open again the golden rays of dawn are streaming in and I immediately start to panic. Evander didn't wake up for his 3a.m. feeding.
I shoot out of bed and yank the bedroom door open.
My heart sinks from my throat back into my chest when I see Gale's up with Evan and everything seems to be fine.
"Are you okay?" Gale asks me.
"Yeah, fine. I was worried when Evan didn't wake up for his 3a.m feeding."
"He did wake up for his 3a.m. feeding. I couldn't get you up for the life of me, so I just fed him. We had a little bit of spare breast milk in the fridge."
"Oh. Okay. Well good. Thank you."
"No problem" He smirks at me.
"Aren't you tiered?" I ask him.
"A little, but I'll live"
"Want me to take Evan so you can go get dressed? He's due to eat soon anyway."
"Sure" He walks over and passes Evander to me and then pecks me on the lips."I already changed him and everything so he should be good for a while."
"That's the sexiest thing I have ever heard you say." I smile at him as I sit Evander on my hip and make my way into the kitchen while Gale disappears into the room.
I start trying to make Gale some kind of breakfast one handed.
I use my teeth to undo the loaf of bread and stick two slices into the toaster.
I dig in the fridge and get butter and then rummage through the cabinets and get out sugar and cinnamon.
By the time I get everything gathered the toast has popped up. I pinch the corners to pull one slice out at a time and lay them on the counter.
Spreading the butter one handed is turning out to be harder than I thought. The bread keeps moving with the knife and it just sticks.
After a couple attempts I abandon the one handed route and go to Evan's room and grab a blanket. I spread it out on the floor in the living room best I can lay him down on it.
"Be right back Evan. I'm just gonna go make Dadda some toast."
He just looks up at me with those honey brown eyes and smiles his toothless grin at me.
I make my way back into the kitchen and finish spreading the butter and mixing the cinnamon and sugar before sprinkling it on the toast.
I take a bite of it; just to you know….taste it. Make sure it's safe….and good….yeah, that's it.
It is good.
I put the slices on the table and pour some orange juice.
When Gale finally makes an appearance he looks handsome as he always does in his dress clothes for work.
The light gray fabric of the shirt and the light blue tie really brings out his eyes.
"I give you….." I sweep my arms to the table like I'm presenting him with some award or jewels or something. "Cinnamon toast"
"Cinnamon toast?"
"It's good, I promise. Not that I took a bite out of it or anything"
"Yeah I can see that. Evander must have been gnawing on it. Thanks, Jo"
"Yeap. I'm going to go feed Evan now. One of my boys down, one more to go" I wink at him as I make my way back out into the living room.
Evan is just laying there with his feet in his hands, looking around like he has never seen anything outside his room before.
I pick him up, sit us on our usual morning spot on the couch and latch him onto my breast.
It seems like no time has passed before Gale is slipping his feet into his loafers and getting ready to head out the door.
"Thanks for breakfast, Jo. That cinnamon toast was really good. New and exciting. I love it."
I just chuckle at him.
"I will see you guys later this afternoon." He leans down and pecks me on the lips again before running his palm over Evander's head.
"Bye Gale, Have a good day. No sleeping on the job."
"Yeah, I'll try. Bye."
And he's out the door.
"What are we going to do today, Evander?"
He flashes his eyes up to me quickly before he turns his attention back to eating.
Once he's finished I put him back down on the blanket go grab him some toys and then go pick up the phone to call Annie.
She picks up on the third ring.
"Hello?" I hear her answer.
"Hey Annie. Sorry it's early, I was wondering if Evan and I come over today?"
"Of course, you can come over Johanna. You don't have to ask."
"Great. We'll be over there in a few. Later Annie"
"Bye Johanna"
I hang up and start pouring myself some cereal for my own breakfast. I eat and then bring Evander into the room with me while I get dressed.
I bring him back out to his blanket on the floor while I scuttle around the house packing him a bag.
Spending the day with Annie was almost like old times.
We would just sit on the porch with our boys on our laps, or walk down the beach. Evan really loved when I dipped his little feet in the water. He was born in District 4 after all. Guess he'll be a little fish like Finney.
Annie made us all lunch and when the boys were napping we got to even enjoy the silence together.
She baked some of the traditional green salty seaweed District 4 bread for us, which I haven't had in forever it feels like. We got to tear off chunks and smear it with butter or cheese while we drank some water with lemon squeezed into it.
So many flavors fighting for dominance, racing across my tongue; Tangy, sour, sweet, salty. So good.
We got to talk and take care of each other's kids; which was fun for me because I got to color with Finney while she was on diaper duty.
Overall it was a really fun day.
After Evander's 3p.m. feeding I start re-packing his stuff and get ready to head out.
I hug Annie and squish Finney into a hug and plant a kiss to his bronze curls.
"See you guys later" I wave to them as I head out the door and make my way home.
By the time I walk in the door I am really fighting the urge to take a nap.
I spread Evan's blanket back out and put him down with some toys scattered around while I start on dinner.
Not two minutes after I set the water to boil the phone rings.
I lower the heat on the stove and cross to the receiver.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Jo. Just wanted to let you know I'm going to be home a little late today. Got caught up at work."
"Good, because I just started on dinner and it won't be ready for a while. Take your time."
"Alright Jo, see you in a couple hours."
"Okay Gale"
He hangs up and I follow suit.
Since I don't feel like I have to rush now, I take my time with dinner.
I set noodles to boil while I very finely chop parsley, and bazil. I start on a creamy white sauce called Alfredo.
I get out the chicken and wash and peel all the fat off of it and then chop that up too. I lightly bread it and fry It in the skillet.
Once everything is done I combine it all into a large pot. The sauce, the noodles, the herbs, the chunks of chicken.
I call it chicken noodle alfredo. I think it's from an ancient place called Italy. Not even anywhere near Panem.
Gale still isn't home when everything is ready so I eat without him.
After my dinner I put the rest away and stick all the pots and pans in the sink to soak.
I feed Evander his 6 p.m. feeding, and then go and bathe him.
The time just ticks further on. I get Evan in his jammies, and in bed as the clock get's nearer to 8. I don't know what in the world can be taking Gale so long.
I even have time to get the dishes done and get a shower.
Once it starts getting closer to 9, I admittedly start to worry a bit. He said a couple hours. It's been over 4.
I was just about to call his office when he finally makes it home. Somehow he looks even more handsome than before he left. His hair is a little windswept, his tie hangs loosely around his neck and his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows.
I can't help but rake my eyes up and down his body a couple times before I finally spew out "Well, hello handsome"
"Back at ya, Beautiful. I'm starving."
"Your dinner is in the fridge."
"Great. Thanks." He sweeps past me into the kitchen.
"So what took you so long?"
He tries to ignore me as he digs in the fridge for his food and starts the microwave up. I'm sure he knows that tactic isn't going to work.
So I wait.
I sit with him as he inhales his food without a word.
I watch as he cleans his plate in the sink without a word.
I watch as he chugs some water from the fridge without a word.
He finally looks at me and says "What?"
"I'm just waiting for you to answer me."
"Answer you about what?"
"I asked you what took you so long?"
"Wellllllll" He stretches out.
"Well, what?"
"Well. I got you a surprise. But I wasn't sure if now was the best time."
"What is it?"
"Okay," He starts. "Well I talked to Miss Ari today, strictly for advice, and I told her about my idea, to see if it would be okay. Something you can handle. She thinks it would be beneficial for you and I do too."
"Sooooo?"
"So. I was wondering, IF," He pauses. "You would like to go to District 7 with me and Evan for a few days next week?"
He pulls the train tickets out of his back pocket and fans them out to show them to me.
I am speechless. He knows this is what I have wanted since…..how many years has it been? 5 years? 6 years? 7 years? Since I was reaped for the quarter quell really.
He's still waiting.
"I" I take a deep breath. "I would love that."
He smiles at me and shoves the tickets back in his pocket before striding across the kitchen and engulfing me in a hug.
"Good." He says. "I wanted to wait until Evan was a little older so he can enjoy it, but we can always go again in a few years. We can invite Annie and Finn if you want. Or my mom and brothers and Posy. Whatever you want."
"What about Finney's birthday this weekend?"
"We can still go to Finn's birthday, I took some time for next week off."
"Oh. Okay." I look at the floor not really knowing what to say to him.
"Jo? What's the matter?"
"Nothing. I. I just don't know what to say"
"Say…..yes! Let's go to District 7"
"Of course. Yes. I want to go to District 7."
"Well then, there is nothing left to say."
"Besides Thank you" I tell him finally meeting his eyes.
"Don't mention it, Jo." He smiles at me, obviously proud of his idea. "I'm going to get a shower, okay? Then maybe we can get to bed early. We did have a….late night last night." He chuckles.
"Yeah, okay." I smile back, remembering last night's escapades.
He disappears into our room and I start locking up the house and flipping light switches off. I check on Evan one more time before shutting his door and making my way to Gale and I's room.
I can't help but pretend to be brushing my teeth so I can go peek in at Gale while he's showering.
I stick the toothbrush in my mouth and then go inch the shower curtain back as stealthily as I can.
I watch like a voyeur for a minute or two and then abandon my operation before I get caught.
I actually brush my teeth and then go crawl under the covers.
I tuck my hands behind my head and stare at my shell necklace nailed into the wall while thousands of thoughts come swimming in my head.
I can't believe Gale is taking me to District 7. I can visit my family's graves. Do I want to even go there? Can I handle that? Are they even still there after the rebellion? How bad will I realize I miss it once I'm there? Will I want to leave? Will Evan like it? Well he's barely a few months old, he won't even know what's going on. Do I remember how the weather is during the summer? Is this some kind of test in my stability that Gale and my head shrink concocted? Gale. I wonder if he ever misses District 12. Would he want to go back? Would it just be too much for him? Katniss is there I think. Would he want to see her? Does he still love her somewhere in his heart? Does…..
"Ummmm….earth to Johanna?"
I snap out of my head to see Gale staring down at me. His hair is still a little damp and sticking up at odd angles. His skin nearly shines with the droplets of water cascading down his body. Good lord. I had to go and marry a sex god, didn't I?
"Huh?" I reply dimly. I can't tear my eyes from him.
"What are you thinking about in that head of yours?"
"What? No. Nothing."
"Okay, Jo. If you say so." He says as he pulls the sheets back and scoots into bed next to me.
I automatically wiggle my way into his arms. This gesture once was the scariest thing for me, now it is like…..coming home.
He lies on his back and I roll over onto my side, resting my head against his shoulder and draping my arm across his chest.
We lay in complete silence. His eyes are closed, but of course now I can't sleep with all my recent thoughts still running around in my head.
I just watch as his chest rises and falls lightly.
I really don't want to say anything to him. I feel like I may explode if I don't though. Holding it in can't be good for my mental recovery.
I roam my eyes up his body until they meet his angelic face. He looks so peaceful.
"Gale?"
"Hummmm?"
"Do you…. Do you ever want to go back to District 12?"
"Why would I want to do that?" He replies sleepily with his eyes still closed.
"I don't know? Memories? To see your old friends?"
"What old friends Johanna? There's no one there for me, and only bad memories. I have no reason to go back."
"Well. Your memories can't be all bad can they?"
He finally opens his eyes and I look away. "What are you getting at Jo?"
"Nothing. I was just wondering."
"Wondering what?"
"If you wanted to go back to 12. We could go if you want. Visit."
"Visit what? I told you there is nothing there."
"I don't know? Visit Katniss?" There I said it. "I mean you did love her at one point in your life."
I hold my breath waiting for him to answer. The silence is awful.
"Jo. I don't want to visit Katniss. We haven't spoken since the end of the war. It's been years. I have nothing to say to her, and I'm sure she has nothing to say to me."
"You don't know that."
"I do know that. Why are you bringing this up?"
I just shrug.
Maybe I can try to pretend to fall asleep.
"Jo?"
Don't answer. Don't answer. Don't answer.
"Jo. I know you're not sleeping."
Crap.
"Why are you bringing this up?" He repeats.
"I don't know. Just wondering I guess."
"Jo. You know I love you. And Evander. And my life here. I have no reason to go back to 12. I am not in love with Katniss. Maybe I was at one time, or at least I thought I was, but that was years ago. I'm not anymore. I love you."
"I know. I don't know why I thought that. I was just wondering."
"Well as long as you know that. My life is here."
"I know. Mine too."
Silence again.
"Umm… night Gale."
"Night, Jo."
His eyes slip closed again and I just watch him for a little while before my eye lids grow heavy and darkness swallows me.
