Chapter 12
*"You want to feel better? Take a pill. You want to get right? Face the truth." -William Bradford
Season 3, Episode17: One Hour*
*One Week Later*
Taking the beer Ian offered him; Don smiled sadly before sinking down onto the steps of Charlie's front porch, though sometimes it was still hard for Don to think of it as 'Charlie's house' even if Charlie had owned it and Don hadn't lived there for quite a few years now. Perhaps it was because their father still lived there, even if it was in the converted garage…Don suspected though, that it had more to do with the fact that it had been his childhood home and his anchor for so many years…or at least it had been until he and Robin had brought a similar house just down the street.
"She's with Lila and her mother," Don replied to Ian's unasked question when seconds later Ian squatted down next to Don and raised his own beer to his lips instead, letting the silence stretch out until Don had felt the need to fill it.
"Did you know that within the time it takes the light from some of these stars to reach us, some of them could already have blinked out of existence?" Ian informed Don quietly making the old agent's eyes flick heavenward.
"Really? An astrology lecture?" Don asked surprised around a long pull from his beer. "Tell me, how does that little titbit surmise my current situation?"
"Sometimes what we're seeing isn't what's really there," Ian replied wryly as he took a pull from his own beer.
"If I wanted an analogy using science that I don't get, I'd have gone to bum beer off of Fleinhardt," Don grimaced as he turned his empty beer bottle upside down to confirm that it was definitely empty before placing it on the solid wood behind him.
"I don't think they let him keep beer in the monastery," Ian smiled wryly before grabbing another beer from the cooler to his right and passing it over to Don to open. "And it was Charlie actually," Ian grinned as he moved to sit down properly and stretch out his long legs.
"What was?" Don replied confused as he used the edge of the solid porch to take the cap off of the beer before downing at least half in one pull.
"The astrology lecture," Ian clarified. "It's one your brother gave me whilst we were at Quantico."
"Please save me the details of what you and my brother get up to when none of us are around!" Don frowned down at his beer, unable to meet Ian's eyes until he heard his old friend laugh and then he couldn't help but turn his frowning gaze upon Ian's mocking grin.
"He only showed me the stars Don," Ian laughed harder as Don's frown deepened and a small blush began to creep up Don's neck.
"Ok so what's your point?" Don asked uncomfortably around the top of his beer as he sent his gaze heavenward once more.
"You know I forget," Ian grinned as Don gave him a little shove of annoyance, muttering something along the lines of Ian sucking at this and how did Robin find his nonsense comforting. "Ok, ok," Ian grinned as he held his hands up in mock surrender. "My point was just that when a supernova explodes, the gas and dust come together to make new stars."
"Why do I get the feeling that you probably could have taught my brother more about the stars than he could you?" Don chuckled at the sly smile that was tugging at the corner of Ian's lips.
"Well, he was so excited to point out the different constellations I didn't have the heart to tell him I could name most of the individual stars. Lord knows I've slept underneath them enough times, would have felt rude not learning a couple of them," Ian grinned as he lifted the beer to his lips and took a sip. "Besides he was just too cute to correct when he got the odd name wrong."
"Chuck cute? Ergh, too much info thanks," Don cringed as he held his hands up in mock surrender. "Besides, I still fail to see how it relates," Don sighed as he placed his empty beer bottle down next to the first one and crossed his arms defiantly. "You know…your whole supernova thing…I thought when we got her home…things might change…that they might go back to how they were before. Sometimes it is and then the rest of the time Robin just locks herself in the bathroom and cries."
"She needs time is all," Ian dismissed Don's concerns as he pulled another beer from the cooler and handed it over. "She's like the supernova after it explodes…she just needs to pull herself together so she can become a new star. Ok, even I heard how lame that was! Perhaps I should cut myself off!"
"What if I don't want a new star?" Don asked seriously, ignoring Ian's rambling as he twisted the unopened beer in his pale grasp. "What if I just want the old one back?"
"Don," Ian replied as gently as he could but Ian Edgerton could hardly be described as the soothing type, "We both know she'll never be the same Robin, but that doesn't mean this new one is bad…or worse. The burn will heal and the memories will fade. The fear will even dampen given time…but the scar is there now…you're both going to have to learn to accept it. It's a part of her now…as much that this scar is a part of me," Ian lifted a shaking hand to rub at the long scar that ripped its way down the side of his face, a lasting reminder of how the snatcher had cut him up, inside and out.
"I didn't think the scar bothered you…" Don frowned at Ian as he placed the untouched beer down on the step by his feet so that he could turn to face Ian properly in the pale moonlight.
"It doesn't," Ian answered truthfully as he dropped his hand to his lap, his gaze fixed on the stars as he forced the next sentence out before he could think better of it. "Or at least it doesn't anymore. Charlie helped me come to terms with it. He was the only person who didn't look at me differently after it all and I love him for that…"
"I'm trying with Robin, but I'm not as strong as my brother," Don admitted sadly as he placed his elbows on his knees and dropped his face into his hands.
"I didn't want to come back you know," Ian admitted reluctantly after a small pause of silence passed between them. "I came back for Charlie but I didn't want to. You and I aren't that different you know. We act tough and we lock down the shit that bothers us but that doesn't mean we're strong…just means we hide our shit better," Ian replied wryly as he grabbed himself a fresh beer.
"Why didn't you want to come back?" Don asked confused as he grabbed his beer from between his feet and uncapped it before taking a long gulp. He was unaccustomed to Ian over sharing and unknowingly, much like his fiancée he didn't like realising that the amazing infallible Ian Edgerton might actually be vulnerable.
"I was afraid," Ian groaned around the top of his beer between pulls. It seemed Ian needed some liquid courage for this little confession. "I'm fucked up Eppes," Ian laughed dryly before taking another gulp as he seemed to struggle with what he wanted to say next. "I saw Nick this morning…I told him that I can't go undercover."
"Why not?" Don shouted confused as he jumped up and whipped around to face Ian properly. "You have a chance to get in there and stop another attack before this prick hurts anyone else! So why aren't you?"
"Because I haven't been entirely truthful," Ian replied quietly, unable to meet Don's murderous gaze. "I was released to return to duty but I was supposed to still be checking in with a therapist…I have PTSD Don and it kills me to admit that I'm weak but I am. I know she's in prison but it's like she's still here, up here," Ian replied pleadingly as he gestured angrily at his right temple. "I can't go undercover in case I have one of my night terrors…I know I'm failing Robin but I truly believe that Marc has the going undercover part…well covered."
"I…"Don faltered. He was still angry but at least he no longer looked like he was going to try and deck Ian anymore. "Damn it!" Don roared frustrated as he kicked angrily at the porch's bottom step and regretted it the second his food connected with the solid concrete.
"I'm sorry," Ian sighed sadly. "Truly I am. I wish I could help Robin for you but I mean it when I say Marc has it covered. He can even go undercover as himself. His back story is more compelling than any cover I could have dreamed up and he has genuine anger issues. It's better than having to fake it like we both know Colby would only be ok at."
"No," Don shook his head as he held up a hand to stop Ian's apology. "I'm sorry. I'm being a crap friend…I know what it took for you to admit that you need help. I know the sacrifice that is to guys like us. So I'm sorry. Besides…Robin will be happier knowing that you won't be going anywhere…are you going to be ok?"
"You know I've been all around the world, and I can say for a fact that I've never seen the stars clearer than I do from this front porch…"
"Ian."
"Yes Don. I'm going to be fine. Charlie is actually helping a lot just by being there and lending me his strength when I need it," Ian smiled sadly and he meant it to. He was getting help and this time he was open to it. He was going to get his shit together and he was going to help Robin do the same if it killed him. Coming home had actually proved to be a setback for her but Ian was sure he had an idea on how to help her channel her anger at something other than Don for a change. It was only a small thing but he hoped it worked because Ian glimpsed the same desperate need to run away in Don that he had in himself and he knew how much strength and energy it took to resist that urge.
"I should probably get back," Don whispered when the silence that passed between them eventually grew uncomfortable.
"Sure," Ian nodded as he stood up and gave Don's arm a gentle squeeze. "I'll come by tomorrow morning to check on Robin. See if I can't convince her to leave the bathroom."
"Good luck," Don grumbled as he gave a little wave before digging his hands in his pockets and stalking away into the growing darkness as the moon passed behind some wispy clouds.
"Thanks," Ian sighed wearily before turning around and taking the empties back inside with him. It was already turning out to be a long night and Ian had a feeling that despite the sleeping tablets he'd been prescribed, he wasn't going to get a lick of sleep and he wasn't to be the only one either.
"You were gone a while," Gloria chided Don as he opened the front door and dropped his keys into the little bowl Robin had put there to stop Don from losing them. "Did you have a good run?"
"I thought it would help clear my head, it didn't," Don admitted with a sigh as he passed Robin's mother to go into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. He'd just had to fight his way past a sea of reporters just to get into his own house, so he wasn't exactly in the mood for a lecture from Gloria. "How is she?"
"She's still in the bathroom," Gloria frowned, but Don had a feeling the frown was aimed more at her difficult daughter and not Don, or perhaps she was just as mad at Don as she added quite pointedly, "Where you left her."
"Ok," Don grimaced as he took a long swig of water before putting the bottle back in the fridge. I'll go talk to her."
"Yes, well-" Gloria began to huff indignantly as Don pushed back past his soon to be mother-in-law to get to the stairs, but he didn't hear the rest as he'd rushed up the stairs to get to Robin. He'd rather the silence of the bathroom door as his fiancée ignored him to the cursing of her mother any day; it was a no brainier really when you thought about it.
"Robin?" Don called gently through the closed door as he lightly rapped on the wooden door with his knuckles. "Honey? Please open the door."
"Go away," Robin's called back in a hoarse and scratchy voice that told him she'd been crying for a while and if there was something Don hated it was the thought of her in there alone.
"Ok," Don sighed as he slid down the wall next to the bathroom door and sat down on the cold hardwood floor. "But I made a promise to you that I wouldn't leave you so I'll be here when, you know…when you're ready." At first Don thought Robin had gone back to ignoring him and then he heard the soft click of the bathroom lock. Not so much a 'thanks Don, do please come in' as an 'I guess you can if you have to'. Needing no encouragement though, Don got up and opened the door to reveal Robin reclining in their empty bath. "Mind if I join you?"
"Sure," She smiled weakly as Don locked the bathroom door behind him before coming over and lowing himself into the other end of the bath, Robin's long bare legs entwining with his somewhere in the middle, it really was a large bath.
"Your mother is driving me insane," Don told her sufferinglywith an agonized expression when the silence between them stretched longer than he was comfortable with.
"You were the one who invited her to stay," Robin reminded him gently, rewarding Don with the slightest of smiles.
"Can you imagine how she'd be if I had suggested she go to a hotel?" Don laughed causing Robin to chuckle as he laid a rough hand around her ankle which was resting next to his lap. Most of the bruises on her legs had faded significantly since the explosion but he could still see one large yellow one on her upper thigh peeking out from under the hem of her white robe and his heart pinched with anger, an anger he hadn't been able to control since he had first gotten Elliott's call from the scene. "When do you recon she'll leave?"
"No time soon I'd imagine," Robin sighed as she followed Don's gaze to her thigh and pulled down on the hem disgustedly until the bruise was mostly hidden.
"Rob."
"Don't," She warned, putting a hand out against his chest to stop him as he leaned forwards till their noses were only separated by a few inches.
"Are you really planning on hiding in here until she leaves?" Don asked concerned, ignoring Robin's warning as he reached a hand up to brush gently against her cheek.
"That's not why I'm in here," Robin whispered ashamed as her gaze flicked over to the bathroom cabinets to their left where she had dumped the bag of bandages and ointments the doctors had handed her before she left the hospital.
"You've been in here all day because your bandages need changing?" Don replied astonished.
It was more of a statement than a question, but Robin answered it anyway, "I thought I'd be able to do it myself…" Robin's voice cracked, jolting his gaze back to hers but Robin was looking down at the robe's white cord, which she was twisting nervously through her slim fingers.
"It's ok, let me change them for you," Don told her quietly as he lifted himself from the bath and held a hand out to help her up out of the tub.
"No Don, don't," Robin replied startled as she sat up and twisted around to face him. "It's ok. I'll get mom."
"Please Rob, just let me help ok?" Don told her firmly as he held out a helping hand again.
"Ok," She agreed reluctantly as she put her hand in his and let him pull her up. "If you're sure?" She grumbled as with shaking fingers she untied the knot around her waist and slipped the robe off so that she was standing in front of Don in just her knickers.
"I'm sure," Don replied a little breathily as he fought to keep the lust that the sight of her caused him out of his voice. "What do I need to do?"
"You need to remove the old dressing and then wash the affected area. There is soap in the bag to use…and she said that the might be some…loose skin…"
"It's ok," Don whispered soothingly as he worked at peeling the bandage back from her shoulder and under her arm until the entire burn was exposed.
"You only need a drop or two of the soap," Robin instructed him as he removed the packaging from the liquid soap and began mixing it with the warm water.
"Ok, tell me if I'm hurting you," He told her softly as he knelt down and used a dampened washcloth with the soap and warm water and began to remove the old ointment and loose skin from Robin's shoulder.
"Its fine," Robin assured Don as he worked thoroughly over the burn, biting his lip as he concentrated on his task. "I've already taken some pain meds."
"Ok," Don nodded as he dropped the washcloth into the sink of soapy water before turning back to face her. "What's next?"
"You need to put a thick covering of that ointment over the burn," Robin whispered as Don dipped his fingers into the cream and began slathering it over her wound.
"Like this?" He asked concerned as he lightly rubbed the ointment in.
"Perfect," She smiled gratefully as Don rubbed the cream in with surprisingly gentle precision. "Then all you need to do is put a fresh dressing on."
"Ok," Don nodded as he grabbed the gauze and began wrapping the wound back up. Though the sight of the burn still made Robin want to throw up, Don hadn't flinched once and she loved him for it. So much so she didn't even hesitate before kissing him.
"Rob," he groaned her name as she moved her mouth from his to leave a burning hot trail of kisses down his jaw and neck to the small hollow of his collar bone as her fingers curled at the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it loose from his jogging pants so that they could slip beneath.
"Don," She half moaned half sighed his name back as his hand reached up and pulled the combs from her hair and dropped them in the bath behind her.
"Are you sure?" He whispered huskily against her ear as she pulled his t-shirt up and over his head before letting it slip from her fingers behind her head so that it dropped into the bath beside her combs.
"I'm sure," She told him firmly as she pulled his hand from her back so that it was covering her breast. Needing no further encouragement Don lowered his mouth to the breast that was partially covered by the bandage and teased her hard nipple distractingly with his tongue as his hands slipped to the lining of her pants, briefly toying with the straps there before shoving them down her thighs until he could slip them past her feet and into the tub behind.
"Mmm," She groaned in her throat as her own hands made a tormenting journey down his broad chest to the waistband of his jogging pants, pausing briefly at the hem before thrusting them down past his ass exposing him. "Take them off," She ordered roughly as she caught him in her other hand and gave him a playful stroke.
"Are you really sure you're ready?" Don asked again with the last once of self-control he could muster whilst Robin was stroking his penis so effectively.
"I just want to be close to you again," She whispered breathily as Don stripped his jogging pants and boxers off and chucked them into the tub with the rest of their clothing. "Make love to me Don," She groaned as she stood up and kissed him hard. "Right here, against the bathroom door." Holding onto his shoulders, Robin wrapped her legs around Don's hips pulling his hard dick closer to where she was wet and waiting from him.
"Shit," Don groaned deeply as he did as she said and pushed her against the hard wooden door before thrusting deep inside of her, only slightly concerned that her mother could be on the other side listening in because the rest of him was consumed by Robin and his need to be with her.
"Shit is right," Robin sighed happily later when they were both finished and laying naked and entangled in each other's arms in the tub.
"Is your shoulder ok?" Don whispered softly, his breath tickling her neck as he pulled her tighter against his naked body. God he'd missed the touch and weight of her against him and to think he had almost lost her!
"Its fine Don," She reassured him gently as she traced little circles with her fingers across his chest.
"You know we should probably leave the bathroom soon. Your mom is probably worried…"
"Can't we just stay like this for a bit longer?" Robin asked selfishly, knowing she'd have to deal with her mother sooner or later and preferring later.
"For as long as you need," Don smiled as he reached up and hooked her hair behind her ears before kissing her softly. "Might get boring eventually though…"
"Not if we have sex again," Robin smiled wickedly as she shifted her body so that she was straddling him.
"Are you sure you're ok?" Don asked concerned as his hands dropped from her hair to her bare shoulders. "You definitely want this?"
"I definitely want you," She grinned and she did want him at least a few more times before she'd probably feel brave enough to face what was on the other side of that bathroom door. Right now though she was happy, aside from a big white bandage and a numbed pain in her shoulder Robin didn't feel weak or like a victim. She was Assistant US Attorney Robin Brooks and there was no stopping her, not that Don intended to when she touched him there or like that.
*The Next Morning*
"Ergh, what is that smell?" Lila grumbled unhappily as she stumbled her way into the kitchen to slump unceremoniously down at the large dining table.
"French toast, Ian's making breakfast," Robin smiled at her younger sibling as Ian brought a plate over along with a steaming mug of black coffee.
"Late night?" Ian asked Lila amused as he set the plate down and she almost gagged. "Trust me, these'll cure the hangover."
"What hangover?" Lila grimaced whilst trying to be sincere but failing miserably when the next second she pounced on the coffee and the bottle of aspirin Robin rolled across the table to her.
"She was out pretty late," Robin told Ian unsympathetically, refusing to lower her voice the way Lila was gesturing for her to do, as she took another large bite of her own toast. "What was it? Three or four a.m.?"
"Three," Lila groaned as against her better judgement, she picked the toast up and gave it the smallest of nibbles.
"Who were you with? Tony?" Robin continued to grill her sister as Lila appeared to warm to the toast and began shoving larger chunks into her mouth.
"Uh huh," Lila nodded around mouthfuls of toast and coffee as Don strode into the room.
"Morning Lila," Don greeted loudly as he ruffled Robin's sister's already unkempt hair. "How are we this morning?"
"Grgh," Lila grumbled as she threw chunks of French toast at him, all of which he managed to avoid as he made his way around the table to where Robin was sitting.
"Morning," He smiled as he leant down and kissed her thoroughly as Lila made gagging noises from the other end of the table and Ian merely raised an eyebrow and smiled.
"Morning," Robin smiled breathlessly when they eventually came up for air and her mother came swishing into the room.
"Lila!" Gloria shouted at her youngest daughter as Lila tried to slip out of the room upon the arrival of their mother but didn't get out quick enough. "Don't you think it's about time you went back to Harvard?"
"It's ok," Lila replied hoarsely, her throat still scratchy from the drinking the night before. "My professors understand I need to be here for Robin."
"Nonsense you're falling behind," Gloria sighed disappointedly, "And I would hardly call going out on the town with that intern when you have a perfectly nice boyfriend back at Harvard, being there for your sister."
"But mom," Lila whined embarrassedly as the others ate their French toast in silence and tried to pretend they weren't listening in, which of course they were. "What if I don't want to go back to Harvard?"
"Nonsense, you're going back even if I have to drive you there myself!" Both Robin and Don looked up hopefully at this statement making Ian chuckle, earning him a dirty look from Gloria.
"Argh!" Lila shouted angrily before turning around and storming from the room closely followed by Gloria who was now lecturing her daughter about the consequences of life as a college drop out.
"Wow," Was all Don and Ian said in stunned unison the second Gloria wasn't close enough to hear it. Robin was completely un-phased; she remembered only too well what growing up with Gloria was like. There had been times when that anger had been turned on her, which made Robin grateful to her sister that she was pulling focus right now. Gloria had been insufferable the past week and now they were home there weren't any nurses to call to chuck her mother out so that she could rest...mores the pity.
"So Eppes, I hear you start back at work today?" Ian asked curiously when Gloria and Lila's screaming could no longer be heard.
"I had better go check they haven't killed each other," Robin grimaced as she got up from the table and walked out the door.
"So? First day that's huge. Why didn't you tell me last night?" Ian asked curiously as Don grabbed Robin's half-finished plate and dug into the toast she hadn't touched yet.
"I got distracted by an astrology lecture," Don shrugged, trying to make light of the situation. "Besides it's no big deal," He added after a bite of toast. "Wow these are good! When did you learn to cook like this?"
"When I was in France…so?" Ian asked again, not one to be easily distracted.
"So, I told Nick that I was ready to come back. Logan has been finding it difficult to split his time between the other teams and this one so I figured if I came back he could focus purely on Robin's case while I manage everyone else," Don replied casually but Ian could hear Don's nerves. Don could play it down as much as he wanted but they both knew this was big news.
"Just remember, I'm here if you need anything."
"There is one thing," Don replied as he put the toast down and turned to regard Ian seriously. "Will you keep an eye on Robin for me?"
"What's up?" Ian looked confused as he got up and poured himself another coffee. "The two of you look good this morning, I don't think I've seen her so happy…well not since…you know."
"We…er…we connected last night…" Don whispered back with an anxious look at the door. "I took your advice to act more like Chuck and next thing I know we're having sex and I made sure she was ready first but…well I didn't try that hard and I just don't want this to be one of those times when you think you've taken a big step forward and end up actually taking two back…."
"Say no more," Ian held a hand up to stop Don's rambling. "Of course I'll keep an eye on her."
"Thanks," Don breathed out a sigh of relief and smiled when Robin came strolling back into the room. "How's Lila? Am I going to have to arrest your mother on suspicion of murder? Because I will, just give me the word," Don grinned wickedly as Robin made her way around the table to where he was stretching an arm out for her and stepped into his warm embrace.
"Unfortunately not, she actually calmed down and was quite reasonable about the whole thing," Robin sighed as Don's hand fanned out across Robin's abdomen, his thumb stroking her gently through the turtleneck's soft cashmere.
"Gloria reasonable?" Ian asked surprised making Robin throw her head back and laugh.
"Hell no," Robin grinned when she realised they'd misunderstood. "Lila calmed down and agreed to go back to Harvard."
"Ah," Don nodded as he realised it was just going to be them and Gloria. "Are you sure she needs to leave immediately?"
"Unfortunately," Robin nodded as she read Don's mind. "Just be grateful you go back to work today and don't have to put up with her hovering all day."
"Talking of which, why don't we go out today?" Ian asked Robin as she stepped out of Don's embrace and took her seat back at the table.
"I'm ok," She grimaced as she took a gulp of her coffee and realised too late that it was cold. "I'd rather just stay here and get up to date on some case files Michael dropped around for me."
"Come on Rob," Don smiled as he rested a hand on her thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. "You've been cooped up in here for a couple days now. Some fresh air will do you good."
"I don't want any fresh air," Robin replied through gritted teeth as she removed Don's hand and stood up to pour her coffee away in the sink and poured herself a new one.
"Not even to spend the day with me and Marc?" Ian smiled, though it was a little forced. He hadn't factored in the chance that she might not want to go out when he was coming up with his grand scheme to help her.
"Not even," She frowned as she turned back from the sink to face them. "I'm not the invalid I was in hospital now. I don't need around the clock care or constant supervision."
"That's not what we're doing," Don frowned sadly, because that was totally what they'd been planning.
"Then prove it by going to work."
"Ok," Don forced a smile as he got up and walked over to Robin. "I'll see you tonight," Don added softly before stooping slightly to kiss her gently as he ran his fingers through her hair, which she had left down for him, and massaged the top of her neck where it met the base of her skull.
"Tonight," She whispered back promisingly as one hand reached out and gave his peck a tender stroke before pushing him away.
"Later Eppes," Ian waved goodbye as Don walked/skipped out of the kitchen without so much as a bye, having probably forgotten that Ian was even there. "Ok, why don't you want to go out?"
"I said…"
"I know what you said, now I want the truth," Ian demanded firmly as he crossed his arms and leaned back in the kitchen chair. "Is it because of the reporters? Because you know I could sneak you out the back?"
"No it's not the reporters," Robin frowned before coming over and taking Don's vacant chair next to Ian. "Though God knows they'd be reason enough, I just…can't. Just thinking about it makes my chest go tight."
"So you're afraid?" Ian asked confused. He shouldn't have been surprised but for some reason he was. The thought that she might feel anxiety over leaving the house had never occurred to him, perhaps because he'd been too preoccupied with his own problems this past week.
"Yes," She nodded ashamed as Ian reached out and took her hand in his.
"Hey, look at me," Ian demanded gently when she looked away at his touch. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you."
"It's not that…well not only that…"
"What is it then?"
"I don't want them to stare…"
"At what?" Ian asked incredulous. "You have your turtleneck on. No bandage in sight, so what will they be looking at?"
"What about when there is no bandage… I can't wear turtlenecks for the rest of my life!"
"By that point the burn will be a scar and it'll fade," Ian told her honestly as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "Besides, you can wear them until you're ready. No one will think any less of you…that is unless you decide to hide away here for the rest of your life and become a hermit...then they might judge you."
Laughing, Robin gave Ian's arm a gentle thump as the tears that had been threatening to fall fell. "Well in that case…there's a way out the back? I don't have to climb any trees do I?"
"No but for where we're going you might want to slip on some old jeans and put your hair up." Ian smiled as Gloria stalked back into the kitchen, her mood apparently no better than it had been when she chased her youngest out of the room earlier.
"Where are you going?" Gloria demanded as she poured herself some coffee and grabbed the last slices of French toast.
"It's a surprise," Ian winked at Robin as she got up and slipped from the room, leaving Ian and Gloria alone.
"Well?" Gloria asked pointedly, fixing Ian with an angry glare over her toast. "What's the big secret? Where are you taking her?"
"To a shooting range," Ian smiled un-phased by Gloria's anger and stern looks.
"I'm sorry," Gloria replied tersely as she stood up and placed her hands on the table, leaning forward as she added, "Are you damaged in the head? My daughter will not be going to any range!"
"Says who?" Ian replied slowly lifting the corner of his mouth in his cruel little cat like smile as he too stood. Had the dining room table not been between them, he would have been towering over her. As it was Gloria showed no signs of cowering from the anger Ian couldn't help but project across the table, not yet anyway. Striding around the table, Ian watched with a cold detachment as Gloria's eyes widened and nostrils flared with surprise. He was quicker than his laid back stance usually portrayed and had his anger not been directed solely at her, Gloria might have taken the time to appreciate his body's cat like agility.
"I do," She told him lamely, with a lot less conviction than she had used the minute before, but standing her ground none the less. She couldn't have known though that his question wasn't directed at her or that her rage had triggered something inside of him that only he could hear or see…
"You're damaged Ian," A cold cruel voice whispered in his ear, the same cold voice that only minutes before had been kissing its way across his body. It was a voice that spoke a promise that the worst was yet to come. "You're broken…but I will fix you. Soon I shall help you find peace."
"Ian?" Robin asked concerned from the doorway, but he was beyond seeing her now as he glared past Gloria at something…someone only he could see. "Get out," Robin told her mother as she strode quickly into the room so that she was standing between Ian and her mother.
"Is he ok?" Gloria asked concerned, though she didn't stick around for an answer as Ian began shouting so forcefully spit was flying from his mouth.
"The only peace I need is to get away from you and your repulsive advances!" Ian shouted angrily. "God, I actually pity you. After all it must be hard for you…being so twisted, so depraved! You talk about me being damaged? Damaged! Who must you be that your own husband found you so disgusting he had to fuck your daughter to get any kind of satisfaction!"
"Ian!" Robin sobbed sadly as she reached out and put her hands on his chest, "It's ok, I'm here. Snap out of it!"
"So tough, so brave…for now. But we'll see. We'll see." Debbie Harris smirked from her seat on the counter by the window. "Don't worry though, we'll soon know whether you're the man my son thinks you are or if you're the coward I know you are. I bet," She whispered as she jumped off the counter and walked towards him, a rag pulled tightly between her two fists. "I bet I'll be able to make you scream before I kill you. What I want to know though," She told him rhetorically, her voice soft and her hand gentle as she stroked his cut cheek. "Is whether the great Ian Edgerton will beg for his life before the end?"
"IAN!" Robin yelled again as she slapped his cheek snapping his unseeing gaze toward her. "Are you ok?" She asked when he blinked and looked around himself confused.
"Where am I?" He asked dazed as he wavered a little unsteadily on his feet.
"In my kitchen," Robin whispered soothingly as she and Gloria steered him to a seat and pushed on his shoulders to make him sit. "Can I get you anything?"
"No."
"Are you sure?" Gloria asked concerned, in her own disapproving way.
"Could you give us some space?" Robin asked when Ian slanted his gaze at her mother, his anger and embarrassment clear to see.
"Fine," Gloria grumbled after a moment, not needing to be told twice.
"What happened?" Robin asked Ian again once they were alone.
"Dr Telford would call it and 'episode'," Ian laughed without humour as Robin poured a glass of water and shoved it in his hand.
"Drink," She ordered before pulling a chair around so she was sitting in front of him. "How long have you been having these episodes?"
"Since I went back to therapy last week," Ian admitted reluctantly as he took a large gulp of water. "I can't help it. Something triggers the memory and then it's like I'm back there living it. Usually it only happens at night…"
"Are you sure you're going to be alright?" Robin frowned concerned when Ian handed her back the glass and stood up.
"I'll be fine. We should get going. Marc's waiting."
"You still want to go?"
"Yeah, why not?" Ian asked confused as Robin wavered uncertainly by the sink. "Seriously? Because of that?"
"Ian."
"Fine. Forget it," Ian growled angrily before storming from the room leaving Robin stunned and at a loss for what to do next.
*Break*
"You know, you've got everyone pretty worried about you," Don chastised gently as he opened the door to Ian's dad's jeep and climbed inside.
"Tell Robin I'm sorry," Ian replied flippantly, his gaze fixed on the house across the street. "Shouldn't you be at the office?"
"I'm taking a long lunch," Don smiled sadly as he crossed his arms and stretched his long legs out. "What are you doing here?"
"I don't know. I didn't plan that far ahead," Ian shrugged as he pulled his aviators down the bridge of his nose to glower at Don over the top of them.
"Ian Edgerton without a plan? That doesn't sound like you," Don smiled weakly but Ian was less than amused.
"Well it's been a long week," Ian scowled, not feeling the least bit chatty. "Don't you have a mountain of paperwork and teams you should be getting up to date with?"
"Nope," Don laughed as he slouched down and got himself comfortable. "Logan, with the help of Liz, actually kept things in pretty good order and so long as it doesn't compromise their work, I'm willing to overlook the relationship they're clearly trying to hide. Other than that, I've spoken with all team leaders and their case work is solid so I have a few hours…or longer. I suppose it depends on how long you're planning on sitting out here. How long are you planning on sitting out here?"
"Shit you're a stubborn bastard," Ian practically growled as Don grinned at him from the opposite side of the cabin. "I don't know ok. I didn't realise where I was driving till I got here and now I don't know what to do next. How did you find me by the way?"
"GPS on your phone. How about we go inside?" Don offered, startling Ian and causing him to frown hard.
"Just like that?" Ian asked surprised. "You make it sound so simple."
"It is."
"Not for me it isn't."
"Then don't go in. Let's go get a beer instead."
"Tempting," Ian smiled weakly as he unbuckled his belt and opened the car door. "But I'm here now."
"Yes you are," Don agreed as he opened the door and stepped outside as well. "After you," He gestured when Ian didn't immediately cross the street.
"You know there is no need for you to come in," Ian offered but Don wasn't having any of it. "I figured as much," Ian sighed at the face Don pulled before twisting the doorknob and letting the door swing inwards. "Welcome to the Snatcher's lair."
"You can still turn back," Don offered as Ian hesitated at the threshold. "We can still go get that beer."
"Maybe after," Ian sighed as he took the first step and then another and another until he was at the base of the stairs. "It looks different in the light," Ian observed quietly, his face devoid of emotion. "Come on, it's this way."
"Shit," Don shivered as they made their way up the stairs to the little girl's room at the back.
"Funny…" Ian noted curiously. "It's smaller than I remember."
"Ian?" Don asked curiously, but it soon became obvious Ian was seeing something that he would never be able to see. Robin had warned him about it but it still spooked Don to see it. Slipping from the room, Don left to give Ian some privacy. He was sure Ian would call if he needed him.
"You once said I couldn't hurt you?" Debbie smirked at Ian from her seat by the radiator. "How's that working out for you?"
"Me?" Ian asked amused as he walked over to the window and fingered what was left of the curtains, the other half having been ripped off to gag him. "I'm not the one in prison."
"Aren't you?" Debbie laughed as she patted the floor beside her, gesturing for Ian to take a seat.
"No," He shook his head and laughed back, "Because you have no control over me anymore."
"Don't I?" She placed a hand over her ample chest. "You're here aren't you? Why do you think that is? Hmmm?"
"To say goodbye and I mean it this time," Ian grinned as Debbie pouted and disappeared, leaving him alone in the room once more. He didn't know how he knew it, but he wouldn't be seeing her again and he felt lighter for it. Like a weight had been lifted from his chest and he could finally breathe again.
"Ready to go?" Don asked quietly from the hallway when a grinning Ian finally stepped out of the small doorway.
"Yes," He nodded as he gestured for Don to lead the way. "We should get back. Marc goes undercover tonight and Logan's plan is going to get him killed."
"What?"
"I've dealt with men like Ethan Gilbert before. He's going to see an introduction from an ex-con, especially this close to a sting, coming. He needs to be made to come to Marc and I know just how to woo a man like that."
"Well you are the expert," Don mumbled as Ian climbed into his father's jeep and shouted through the open window, "Meet you back at HQ," Before pulling away from the curb and speeding off.
At least Ian had looked more like his old self for a moment. The thrill of besting a psycho bomber could do that to you Don guessed as he jumped into his own car and followed after Ian all the while thinking of Robin. It hadn't been an easy week what with Claudia revealing the identity of the Courthouse bomber or when the search of his home had proved that he had been blackmailed into it after all.
Don didn't believe in keeping secrets as far as Robin was concerned, but in her fragile state the fact that the bomber's kid was still missing and presumed dead, was something Don had decided she didn't need to know. Though Marc and Ian hadn't liked the decision at the time they had soon come to see it Don's way…well eventually they had anyway.
Don was just anxious to get the case wrapped up so Robin could start to move on properly and as much as he disliked the ATF Agent, Don was anxious about this plan to send him in undercover. It was risky enough for a fully functioning Agent, but for one that was dependent on a cane? It was insane and that morning Don had told Nick that, not that he'd listened. Ian had made a compelling argument in the Agent's favour and Nick wouldn't be swayed. Don just hoped that Ian knew what he was doing because Don didn't know what Robin would do if another explosion went off…or what he would do if she was the target this time. There was just so much they still didn't know. Like where the next bombing would be…
No, Don was not happy. Not one little bit.
