(I'm a firm believer in equal comforting, it's not just for women, men need serious comforting too and this doesn't exclude our tough bad ass Vegeta! Remember to give comfort to anyone who needs it!)
Need
There were some days where he could be so cold and distant. Those days made me feel so unloved and unappreciated. It made me doubt our whole marriage and rethink the reasons why I married him.
And then there were days like this, where he acted like he couldn't breathe without me near. Days where he just couldn't function and was somewhat like a very small child. A child who's just utterly lost in this big world.
Today was one of those days where he just needed me. I wasn't sure what triggered these days, it seems like he wakes up in these moods. I know he has nightmares about his past, he talks in his sleep and I've heard some horrific things. Sometimes I just stay up watching him toss and turn in horror, trapped in an endless nightmare that he can't shake. It makes me feel helpless watching my husband be trapped by his past.
He rolled over very early in the morning and grabbed me, jerking me close to his body.
"Mm, Vegeta, what—," His legs and arms wrapped around me, his breathing somewhat shaky.
I didn't have to ask what was wrong, I already knew. I rolled over, which was difficult because his arms were clutching me tightly. I looked into his usually dark unemotional eyes; they weren't so unemotional now, instead, they were full of many different emotions. Emotions that he always held inside of him until they forced their way out.
He just stared at me; it was hard to tell what he was thinking. All I knew is that he just needed this closeness, this intimacy to make himself feel better. And if I tried to pull away or fight him about it, he'd just breakdown.
Not breakdown in the sense of blubbering tears, that wasn't Vegeta. He wasn't one for tears. If I pulled away and didn't give him this closeness he needed, he'd retract into himself and become a total stranger, or I just wouldn't see him at all.
It worried me the last time he disappeared; I had no idea what he was doing and when he did finally come back, it was apparent he had taken his rage, sadness, and panic out on himself. The new scars, scars that I had never seen before, were vicious and took weeks to heal over. I don't ever want him to hurt himself again, so, anytime he woke up like this I would lay here for as long as he needed.
As we laid in bed staring at each other, the alarm rang out suddenly, which made him jump. He was so jumpy during these times. Like the world scared him. It was so unlike the typical Vegeta, the hard ass who was all about training and wasn't afraid of anything.
He tucked his head into my chest, inhaling deeply. I stroked his back and arms, his muscles were so tense. I pressed my nose into his wild hair, it smelt like the shampoo I bought that he seemed to favor. He shuddered when he felt my nose against his skin.
We laid in bed for a while. I wasn't even going to attempt to move. Every time I did, he'd pull me tighter and his breathing would turn into panic huffs.
I continued to stroke his back as he tried to bury his head into my chest. I always figured he had some mother issues, or if he even remembered his mother. It was hard to tell, he barely spoke about his father, he's never once mentioned his mother.
I could remember when I began thinking he had mother issues; Trunks was still a baby, probably five or six months and I was still breast feeding. Vegeta just happened to burst into the room, complaining about the G.R. breaking again when he stopped dead in his tracks, staring intensely at a nursing Trunks.
It was somewhat awkward; his gaze was rooted at Trunks' suckling mouth. I blushed and said, "What!? You've never seen a mother feed her baby creep!" I immediately regretted it. He blushed and looked very sad then that quick flash of sadness turned to anger.
There was a low rumble in his chest as one of his hands found its way into my hair. His other arm was wrapped around my back. I sighed to myself and stroked my fingernails through his hair. He shuddered and rolled his eyes. I tried to contain the smile on my face; sometimes it was nice to see Vegeta somewhat humanized.
Knock! Knock! Knock! "Mom! Are you up? I need to get ready for school!" Trunks called.
"Go find your grandparents! I'm busy at the moment!" I yelled back.
"Okay!" He said. I've never let Trunks see his father like this. I don't know if it would change his view about his father. Trunks looked up to the man, he thought he was just the bee's knees. I didn't know how he would react to seeing his father so vulnerable.
"I love you Vegeta." I told him.
He didn't answer, I didn't expect him to. He wasn't one for words, even in this state. After an hour or so, his stomach began to rumble, as did mine. My hand moved from his back to his stomach; I lightly scratched my nails across his abs.
He didn't make a move to get up and get breakfast. It was shocking that a Saiyan wouldn't bother to get food when he was so hungry. I reached over to the button on the keypad. A domestic robot rolled in.
"How may I assist you Miss Bulma?"
"Bring us breakfast in here please." I commanded.
"Yes, Miss Bulma." The robot rolled away to fetch breakfast.
The robot returned with a tray of different breakfast foods. I hadn't asked for anything in particular. The robot laid the tray of food on the edge of the bed.
As I lifted myself up, Vegeta clung to me, making it more difficult for me to lean up. I lifted him with me, which was a challenge since he was weighted down with rock hard muscles. I have up on trying to find a comfortable position as Vegeta clung tighter to my torso.
I grabbed the bowl of fresh sliced strawberries, took a few bites then offered one to Vegeta. He stared blankly at it, then opened his mouth. I placed the strawberry on his tongue and watched as he slowly chewed. It was weird seeing him eat so slowly.
I continued to feed him, watching intensely as he chewed the food I presented. Normally he could demolish this entire tray of food himself and still need more, but I wasn't sure if I should feed him the entire tray. Maybe he'd eat more when he wanted.
After I had my fill, and giving Vegeta what I assumed was his, I slowly lifted us off the bed. He held onto me as I walked us to the bathroom. It was difficult maneuvering; he was just so damn heavy.
Once we were in the bathroom I sat him on the closed toilet lid. He had a firm hold on my waist as I bent to turn the water on and reached for the towels in the cabinet. When I put everything within reach of the bathtub I slipped my thin nightie over my head and kicked my underwear off.
Vegeta didn't say anything or react to my nakedness; he just continued to hold my waist and press his cheek into my stomach. I grabbed a hold of his boxers and tugged them down his legs. He didn't try to help me pull them off so I was more so jerking then pulling.
I pulled him to his feet and helped in over the side of the tub. He refused to let go of me so we slid down into the water. I was sitting on my knees between his legs as he kept his grip on me. I sighed again.
I grabbed the cup and poured some hot water over his back; he trembled and closed his eyes. I continued to pour the water over him. His breathing was steady as I did this. As I washed him with soap I would occasionally place a kiss on his forehead.
As I scrubbed his hair he rolled his eyes back. I ran my finger through his hair, it wasn't tangled but he seemed to like it. Once he was completely clean, I cleaned myself; working around his arms.
Now for the hard part; getting our wet bodies out of the tub. As I stood, his arms went from around my waist and slid to my knees. I grabbed his hands and unwound them, but I still held onto them tightly so he wouldn't panic.
In the few moments it took me to step over the tub, he began to hyperventilate even though I was holding his hands. I pulled him to his feet, he immediately wrapped his arms around my waist again. I sighed and grabbed the towel, drying him off.
I decided to forgo the clothes, since we were just going back to bed. I walked him to the bed laying him down first then crawling over him and getting onto my side of the bed. He curled around me as I sat up against the headboard and pillows.
I looked down at him; he looked so vulnerable and small curled up against me. I stroked his hair and smiled at him. He just closed his eyes as I stroked, enjoying the closeness that he usually denied himself.
We held each other for the rest of the day. The only time I would attempt to move was when I called for food and I sat us up to eat. A lot of wives wouldn't spend all day in bed allowing a husband who barely would give her a time of day any other day.
But, Bulma loved Vegeta; she'd do this for him every time he needed it. And she knew, that somewhere inside of him, he loved her too. If he didn't love her, he wouldn't be like this on his days of need.
