S1E5P1
No one slept well that night. I certainly didn't. I sat against a tree at the edge of camp and stared at Andrea and Amy. Neither moved all night. I dozed on and off until morning when Rick woke me.
"Have you been here all night?"
I blinked, rubbing dew from my face and realising I was covered in walker blood from the one that fell on me. So much for my new clothes. I sighed.
"Yeah. I didn't want to leave Andrea and she didn't move, so…"
Rick helped me up and I leaned back, stretching and groaning. In the light of day the massacre was so much worse. Bodies littered the camp, both survivors and walkers alike. People were beginning to deal with it and still Andrea didn't move.
"I can't bear to think about how she feels. It's too close to home, you know?" I said, looking at Rick. He nodded solemnly. "It could have been me holding Hailey or Luke. It still could be, if I ever see them again."
"I know what you mean. Too well."
Rick gripped my shoulder, drawing my attention away from Andrea.
"You saved my son last night." He said, looking into my eyes with an intensity I hadn't seen before. "The walker would've taken a bite out of him if you hadn't pulled him aside and you nearly died in the process."
"Well, of course I did. He's a child. Children are more important than anything else these days."
Rick nodded, looking down for a moment. When he looked back up his eyes were red with unshed tears.
"I don't know what I'd do if I lost my boy. You saved him last night and I can't ever begin to thank you for it."
I smiled lightly, realising just how terrifying last night must have been for him.
"The thank you and the fact that Carl is alive is enough, Rick." I said, patting the arm still clasped to my shoulder. He nodded, clearing his throat and straightening.
"Then thank you again." He said.
We went back to the camp as Lori stepped away from Andrea. Daryl was dispatching walkers with a pick axe while Glenn helped take them away to burn them.
"She still won't move?" Rick said.
"She won't even talk to us. She's been there all night. What do we do?"
"Can't just leave Amy like that." Shane said. "We need to deal with it same as the others."
"I'm not sure…" I said, biting my lip.
"You want to leave her there ready to tear into us?" Shane said, looking at me as if I were crazy. I rolled my eyes.
"Of course not, but Andrea isn't stupid. She knows what she will have to do and even if she doesn't, if it looks like Amy's going to kill her, I'll step in end it. It's not like she's going to be able to creep up on us. We'll know when she turns."
"I ain't risking it. Not with the kids here. Anything could happen."
I sighed but didn't argue.
"I'll tell her how it is." Rick said, heading over to Andrea. Before he reached them Andrea drew a gun on him.
"Andrea." I said.
"I know how the safety works." She said, staring at Rick. He held his hands out to her.
"Alright. Okay. I'm sorry." He said, backing away.
"Y'all can't be serious. Let that girl hamstring us? The dead girl's a time bomb." Daryl said.
"One we have an eye on." I pointed out.
"What do you suggest?" Rick asked.
Daryl looked over to Andrea and Amy.
"Take the shot. Clean, in the brain from here. Hell, I can hit a turkey between the eyes from this distance."
"No." Lori said. "For God's sake, let her be."
Daryl shook his head and stormed off, patting Jim on the shoulder.
"Wake up, Jimbo. We've got some work to do."
Daryl helped Morales with a corpse, dragging it towards the bonfire of walkers Glenn was beside.
"What are you guys doing?" He said. "This is for geeks. Our people go over there."
"What's the difference? They're all infected." Daryl said.
"Our people go in the row over there." Glenn said again, seething as his eyes grew glassy. "We don't burn them! We bury them. Understand? Our people go in that row over there."
Eventually they obliged, but Daryl had to open his mouth as they dumped the corpse.
"You reap what you sow."
"You know what?" Morales said. "Shut up, man."
"Y'all left my brother for dead. You had this coming."
I sighed, rubbing my head and really feeling the craziness of the last few days. More than anything I was feeling the bad night's sleep I'd had. I needed coffee.
"A walker got him! A walker bit Jim."
I jumped as Jacqui cried out, drawing everyone's attention to Jim.
"I'm okay." He protested, but no one was taking that at face value. People started freaking out and in turn, Jim began to panic, grabbing a spade to defend himself.
"Jim, put it down." Shane said as they circled him.
Eventually T-Dog grabbed him from behind and Daryl jumped forward to pull his shirt up. A very obvious bite mark was carved into his flesh. He never stopped proclaiming that he was fine.
Later, we gathered to try and figure out what to do.
"I say we put a pickaxe in his head and the dead girl's and be done with it." Daryl said.
"He's not dead yet." I said.
"He might as well be."
"Is that what you'd want if it were you?" Shane said, turning on Daryl.
"Yeah, and I'd thank you while you do it."
"I hate to say it – I never thought I would – but maybe Daryl's right." Dale said. I stared at him in shock.
"Jim's not a monster, Dale, or some rabid dog." Rick said.
"I'm not suggesting-"
"He's sick." Rick said, cutting Dale off. "A sick man. We start down that road, where do we draw the line?"
"The line's pretty clear. Zero tolerance for walkers, or them to be." Daryl said.
"What if we could get him help? I heard the C.D.C was working on a cure." Rick said.
"I heard that too." Shane nodded. "Heard a lot of things before the world went to hell."
"What if the C.D.C is still up and running?"
I had to admit, the idea of the C.D.C being up and running was tantalising. It gave me hope to imagine someone actually working to end this hell.
"Man, that's a stretch right there." Shane said, voicing what my rational side was thinking.
"Why? If there's any government left, any structure at all, they'd protect the C.D.C at all costs, wouldn't they? I think it's our best shot. Shelter, protection…"
"Okay, Rick, you want those things, alright? I do too, okay? Now if they exist, they're at the army base. Fort Benning."
"That's 100 miles in the opposite direction." Lori said.
"That is right. But it's away from the hot zone. Now listen to me. If that place is operational, it'll be heavily armed. We'd be safe."
"Not necessarily." I mumbled, shivering at the thought of the soldiers.
"The military were on the front lines of this thing. They got overrun. We've all seen that. The C.D.C is our best choice and Jim's only chance." Rick argued.
"You go looking for aspirin, do what you need to do." Daryl said, turning to Jim with the pickaxe. "Someone needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem!"
Rick was quick to draw his Python and hold it to Daryl's head. Shane moved between him and Jim.
"We don't kill the living."
Daryl lowered the pickaxe and turned to Rick.
"That's funny coming from a man who just put a gun to my head."
"We may disagree on some things, not on this. You put it down. Go on." Shane said.
Daryl dropped the pickaxe and stormed off. Rick grabbed Jims' arm.
"Come with me."
"Where are you taking me?"
"Somewhere safe."
Ricks' idea of somewhere safe was the RV. I stayed with him long enough to clean and patch Jims' wound – not that it would make much difference. When I came out, Rick and Shane were heading toward me with their hands on their guns. I frowned, then jumped, almost falling out of the RV as Andrea shot Amy.
I looked down as Andrea began to cry.
Later everyone left in the camp traipsed up to where Shane and Rick had dug graves.
"I still think it's a mistake not burning these bodies. It's what we said we'd do, right? Burn them all, wasn't that the idea?" Daryl said.
"At first." Shane muttered.
"The Chinaman gets all emotional, says it's not the thing to do, we just follow him along? These people need to know who the hell's in charge here, what the rules are."
He had a point. I still had no idea who the leader was, though I reckoned it was Shane. Or had been. Since we'd arrived, Rick seemed to be finding himself more in positions of decision making.
"There are no more rules." Rick said.
"Well, that's the problem." Lori said. "We haven't had one minute to hold onto anything of our old selves. We need time to mourn and we need to bury our dead. It's what people do."
We stood in silence when Andrea and Dale brought Amy's body to the hole. My eyes stung with tears and I went to help her, but she was already yelling at Dale, saying she could do it herself. I waited a moment longer than anyone else, giving a silent prayer and wishing I could have known Amy better. Then I trailed away from the graves.
"Are we safe now, dad? Now that we're together?" Carl asked Rick.
"I won't leave again. I promise you that. Not for anything."
Carl nodded, holding back tears.
"Now give me a chance to discuss some things with your mum, okay?"
"Yeah."
"Alright." Rick looked up, seeing me coming, and smiled. "Ava, could you take Carl back to camp."
"Sure. I'll teach him to play poker." I teased.
Rick chuckled, but Lori looked unsure.
"That was a joke." I told her and she shook her head.
"Sorry." She said. "And thank you. For saving Carl last night."
I nodded.
"You're welcome." I said, moving past the couple. I patted Carl on the back as we headed back to camp. "Come on, kid. What do you say to learning something else?"
