Chapter 12
My feet can't carry me out of this damned mine fast enough. It's been the longest of days. My crew was switched to a new area because our regular area was flooded from all the rain we've been having. The new area was even more cramped than our regular one and my body is aching from being awkwardly bent all day. And Madge hasn't left my mind for one minute today. All day I've been worried about how she's doing. Did she handle school okay? Was she able to hold her true emotions a secret and pretend to be the Madge that everyone expects of her? And my exhaustion over having not really slept last night wasn't much help towards having a good day either. But none of that matters now. Right now, I'm on my way up to the surface to see Madge again. Once I have her in my arms, nothing else will matter. And there she is. As my eyes adjust to the light, they focus right on her. Sitting on the boulder, blonde hair blowing in the wind, looking like the most beautiful girl my eyes have ever seen.
"Hi." I say as I kiss her forehead, not wanting to smear coal dust all over her face by kissing her the way I really want to.
"Come on. Let's get you cleaned up. We have lots to talk about." She tells me, taking my hand and leading me towards her house.
I follow her to her big, empty house and take the quickest shower ever. The massaging, hot water feels so good on my sore muscles but I'm anxious to get out and talk to Madge. Anxious to know what she wants to tell me. I can't get a read on her emotions. Can't tell if it's good or bad or what. Once I dry off and get dressed I go back into her bedroom where she sits, cross legged on her oversized bed waiting for me.
"Alright, I'm all cleaned up now spill. What's going on?"
"I decided to fight. I want to train for the games. I need to give myself whatever advantage I can by being prepared."
"Madge, stop. I can't even think about…"
"No. Listen, it's what I have to do. If I'm going into the games, which we both know I am, then I need to be prepared. We have some time, not a lot, but some. I need to use that time wisely and prepare myself as best I can."
"No. I can't let you go into the games…" I start again, ready to try and bring up running away again.
"It's happening Gale. I can't change that. But I can try to win. If I work hard, if I train hard enough, maybe I can win and then I can come home to you. I can come home to marry you."
"No. It'll ruin you. Even if you're lucky enough to make it out of there, it'll ruin everything about you. You won't be who you are now. You just can't Madge. You can't go into the games." I tell her, desperately trying to get her to understand.
"But Gale, I thought, I really thought you'd be happy that I was going to try and win. I thought you'd help me with training."
"Madge, I love you so much. I do. But this isn't what I want. I don't want to help you learn to kill other people. I can't think about you doing the things that you'll have to do in the games."
"It's the only way I get to marry you. Do you realize that? The reaping is before I finish school, before we're supposed to get married. If I want to marry you, if I intend to be with you, it's the only way I have that chance." She says as tears trickle down from her blue eyes. "And I do want to marry you."
I grab hold of her shoulders and pull her to me, desperate for her. "Then marry me. But do it now. Do it before the reaping."
"What?" She whispers, pulling back so that her teary blue eyes are staring straight into mine.
"Marry me now. Let's not wait."
"But, school. I'm not finished. My father said I have to finish school."
"Who cares about school anymore? You won't finish anyway if you go into the reaping. Marry me now. Let's make the next nine months about us, just us, okay?" I beg her. All I can think is that I have to marry her now. Have to marry her before she's taken from me.
"I, I …" She stutters, caught on her words.
"Say yes. Just say yes. We'll figure everything else out."
"Yes." She whispers.
I kiss her with all that I have, with every bit of love I have for her. She'll marry me now. That will give me nine months as her husband. Nine months to convince her to run away instead of going into the games.
"Are we crazy? Is this crazy of us? Can we really do this?" She asks between her tears and her kisses.
"I think we're the only ones who're sane. The only ones." I whisper as I let my lips linger at her neck. My hands pull her dress up and she lifts her arms so I can lift it over her head. She pushes herself backwards, laying back further onto the bed and pulls me towards her, her lips calling out to mine. The worries of the moment fade from my mind and we both find escape in each other's touch. Our love, our absolute desire for one another overriding everything else.
Later, as she sleeps so soundly wrapped in my arms, I again watch her, trying to memorize this moment. The fear of losing her is back. I have to make her see that running away is our only option. The only way we get to be together forever. Along with that I have a lot more to think about now. I have to figure out how in the world I can get married right away. We'll need a place to live. And I have to figure out a way to support both my family and us too. And I have to conjure up the courage to tell both our parents that we aren't waiting any longer. In a way it really is stupid for her to bother finishing school. And school was the big reason they felt she was too young to marry me just yet. The way I see it, if she's old enough to deal with all the things that have consistently been thrown onto her plate then she's old enough to get married.
It occurs to me that Katniss's old house is still going unused. I could talk to Katniss and see if she'll rent it out to us. That would give us a place to live. Ugh, but Katniss. That would involve speaking to Katniss. I've been avoiding her, ignoring her attempts to talk to me. After her ridiculous fit about me taking Madge in to the woods and to the lake I really haven't wanted to talk to her. She tried to get me to hear her out, to let her explain but I wasn't ready for that. Guess I'll have too be ready for it now. I look down at Madge again and twirl a lock of her hair around my finger. How will she handle it I wonder? Will she be able to handle living in the Seam? If and hopefully when I convince her to run, will she be able to handle life out in the woods with just the two of us? I have to do everything in my power to keep her safe, to make her happy, to give her the life she deserves. And I will. I'll do whatever it takes.
I must finally drift off to sleep because I wake the next morning just in time to head to work. I kiss Madge goodbye and she stirs from her slumber.
"You leaving?" She asks as she rubs her eyes.
"Yeah. After work today I've got to take care of something but I'll come here after and see you, okay?"
"Okay. See you tonight." She says as she rolls over and slips off to sleep again.
At work my crew gets moved back to its normal area so thankfully it isn't as bad as yesterday. My shift ends and I hurry home so I can wash up. That's one of the worst parts of working in the mines is that you can't go anywhere straight from working. You always have to clean up first. Vick is outside hanging laundry on the line so I tell him to let my mother know that I'm going over to see Katniss and then back to Madge's house so she won't expect me back tonight.
Katniss is sitting on her front porch when I walk up. She's alone which is good since the conversation we're about to have probably isn't one best had with an audience.
"Got a minute? To talk to me?" I ask.
She gestures to the chair next to her and then looks at me. "I've been trying to talk to you for days now."
"I know. I'm sorry. It wasn't a good time."
"Well, I guess you want me to explain my outburst from the other day so I may as well get it over with. The things I said, I meant them but they came out all wrong. My problem isn't with you and Madge being a couple. I'm happy you found somebody that you seem to love. What I'm not happy about is your having not thought about my feelings."
"Katniss, I don't understand. You and I, we aren't, we were never a couple." I interrupt her with my confusion. Why on earth would I stop and consider her feelings before falling in love? It had nothing to do with her.
"Not what I mean Gale." And she sighs in frustration, realizing she'll need to lay this out for me since I'm not getting it. "I got reaped. I went away to what very likely could have been my death and how do you think it made me feel to come home and find that while I was gone my two best, my two only, friends had spent that time not worrying about me but instead spent all that time falling in love with each other. And it was like I didn't even matter to either of you anymore. Like your lives just carried on without me."
"That's what you think happened? That's why you're upset?" I ask her.
"Well, yeah. But it's more than that too. Gale, you took her to all the places we used to go. To the woods, to the lake and the cabin. Places that were special to me. And then you went and made yourselves at home in my old house without even asking."
"I am sorry about the house thing. I really didn't think you'd mind. And for what it's worth, Madge protested, said we should ask you first but I insisted it was fine. But the woods, the lake I'm not sorry for that. Yeah they were places that we used to go together but me taking her there doesn't change that. We can still go, me and you. I'm ready to go anytime you are. And neither of us forgot about you while you were gone. If anything, it was our concern and fear for your safety that brought us together initially. We worried about you the whole time."
"I also didn't realize how serious you two really were. At first, I figured she was just another girl you were fooling around with. I couldn't believe how stupid of you it was to play around with the heart of the mayor's daughter. I had no idea you planned to fall in love and propose to her. You never told me by the way, when is the wedding?"
"It was supposed to be next year, after she finishes school."
"Supposed to be? As in not happening now?" She asks with surprise.
"No, still happening. Just sooner and not the way we'd intended."
"Gale, she's not, you didn't get her …"
"No, nothing like that. It's more complicated." I interrupt not wanting to discuss that part of my relationship.
"Well, what then?"
"She's going to be entered 500 times in the next reaping."
"Are you serious?" She asks, leaning in, her face showing nothing but horror.
"Yeah. It isn't the kind of thing I'd joke about."
"Why? What did she do for that to happen?"
"Nothing. It's a long story but it's ultimately because of an agreement her mother made when she was a baby. President Snow summoned her to the Capitol this week and informed her about the reaping. It's why I wasn't in a good mood, why it wasn't a good time to talk to me the other day."
"Gale, she can't handle the games. It'll be the death of her."
"You think I don't know that? Katniss, I'm not stupid. I can see what the games did to you. You think I don't realize what they'll do to her?"
"And there isn't another option?"
"Not one she'll consider. She wants to train. Wants to get prepared to go in. She thinks she'll be able to maybe win and then come home to me and resume life as normal. But she won't. Even if she wins and comes home to me, she'll never be the same as she is now."
"No, she won't."
"I want to take her away. Run with her. She won't though. Doesn't want me to leave my family."
"Are you going to help her train?"
"No. I can't do it. Right now, my only game plan is to marry her right away so I can enjoy being married to her and hope that I can at some point persuade her to run with me."
"I'll do it. I'll train her. She'll need all the help she can get just in case you aren't as persuasive as you hope to be."
"Thanks, Madge will be really grateful for that. Can you not tell her what my plans are? Can you keep that just between me and you?"
"Yeah, sure."
"One more thing that I need your help with. Your house in the Seam, I wanted to ask if I could rent it for a while? If I want to marry Madge right away, I have to find us a place to live and I don't really have the money to buy a house yet."
"No. You can't rent my old house. But you can use it and stay there as long as you need to. It can be my wedding gift to you two." She says.
"Thanks Katniss." I tell her, hoping my voice is accurately reflecting just how grateful I really am.
She nods and takes a deep breath before giving me a sad smile. She knows just as well as I do that the odds are most certainly not in favor of Madge and I right now. I tell her goodnight and head off towards Madge's house. When I get there, I find her out back, working in her garden.
"Hi! I was wondering when you'd get here. Did you eat yet?"
"Hi and no, I haven't eaten yet." I say as I lean down to kiss her. She's got dirt smudges on her face and couldn't look more adorable with her overalls on and hair falling in her face. For a girl who looks beautiful all the time in her fancy clothes I have to say that I find myself liking her best when she's messy and undone like this.
"Good, I waited for you. I had Mabel make us both a dinner plate, told her you'd be staying here again tonight."
"You don't have to have Mabel make dinner for me you know." I tell her as I roll my eyes.
"I know but I did anyway so come on, let's go eat."
We go inside and find two dinner plates piled high with spaghetti and meatballs and toasted, buttery garlic bread. I've seen it before but never had it myself. This is usually the case when it comes to food at Madge's house. She patiently teaches me how to twirl my fork so that the noodles wrap around it. I'm not as good at it as she is but with some practice I probably could get the hang of it.
"So, what was it you had to do after work?"
"Needed to talk to Katniss. Had to straighten everything out from the other day. She tried to come talk to me while you were in the Capitol but I was so worried about you that I just couldn't deal with it right then."
"And it went okay? Everything's good now?"
"Yeah, we talked. Everything's fine now. But guess what?"
"What?"
"She's going to train you."
"What about you? Can't you train me too?"
"No. She'll be much better at it than I would, trust me. I'd probably just be too easy on you anyway." I tell her, trying hard not to let her see that I just can't handle the thought of training her for the games.
"Well, she'll be my mentor when I go so it'll probably be good having her train me."
"Now, we have some plans to make. When do you want to get married? We need a date."
"I was thinking maybe a week from Sunday? Is that too soon?"
"A week?" I laugh as I tell her "No, that's not too soon for me. Does that give you enough time? Time to plan whatever it is you want to do with the wedding?"
"Honestly? The wedding I want to have doesn't take a lot of planning. I do think that the wedding my father will need me to have will differ from what I want but can still be done in a short amount of time given all his Capitol connections."
"What kind of wedding do you want?" I ask, realizing now that I've never asked this before.
"My dream wedding? In the church we found, just us and our families. Simple."
"And what will your father be having us do instead?"
"A huge, overdone, embarrassing event that's less about us and more about catering to the Capitol."
"We have to invite Capitol people?" I ask her in disgust.
"Most likely, yes. There will be a huge dinner reception with dancing and everything."
"And you think all that, plus your dress, can get planned in a week?"
"You'd be surprised how quickly it can come together. I know it's a lot to take in, you aren't too overwhelmed are you? You still want to go trough with it, right?
"It is overwhelming but I'll suffer through it if it means being with you." I tell her as I try to picture myself marrying her in front of hundreds of strangers.
"We have other things to think about too. Where are we going to live?"
"Tell you what, you handle the wedding planning and I'll take care of the living arrangements." I tell her, wanting it to be a surprise when I take her to our house for the first time.
"Deal. Now, when do we tell our parents?"
"Tomorrow. We tell them tomorrow and we do it together."
"No, I tell my father and you tell your mother. I don't want them to feel ambushed by both of us."
"Okay. Whatever you want. Do you think they'll kill us?"
"No, not given the new circumstances of the reaping. I think anyone who's ever been in love before will understand."
"And oh how in love I am." I tell her as I smile and tuck her hair behind her ear. I can't even begin to tell her in words just how in love with her I really am.
