They hit the hard floor with a thud and Dean immediately felt nauseous. Yep, he was going to…

"Dean?...Dude, gross." Sam commented from above him as Dean heaved the contents of his stomach... everywhere.

Rolling onto his back hurt and his chest heaved. "Hey, Sammy." He coughed out.

"You okay?"

"Peachy." Dean tried to stand and wobbled. Jack and Cas slumped against the far wall. Cas looked nauseous himself as he checked over his son, concern in his eyes. After a few minutes, he seemed satisfied that he was okay. There was a flash worry before the smile. Jack tried for a smile but it faltered as his eyes fluttered closed. The young man was exhausted.

Sam moved to support his brother, a hand on his back. Dean braced all his weight on the library table trying to steady himself.

"Jack are you okay?" Sam asked, "What the hell happened over there?"

"I'm alright Sam, thank you. Just tired." Jack replied.

"Our boy here had a 'Johnny Storm' moment." Dean swayed on the spot.

"What?" Sam exclaimed, ready to catch him.

"He was lighting angels on fire with his force-field." Dean added, "...and no I'm not joking."

Dean heaved but kept it down by breathing, "My head is killing." He slumped into a chair, "Cas, you okay?"

The angel nodded, "Are you?"

"Dizzy, sick..."

"That will be the side effects, it should wear off."

"Side effects? Of the spell?" Sam asked. Cas shook his head, grimacing.

Dean heaved again and fell off the chair when he ran for the bin. He stumbled and slammed into the wall, fell to his knees and threw up again.

"Will someone please tell me what happened?" Sam growled, irritated.

"Alternate me got married to Dean. Jack was abducted by angels who wanted to destroy him and we were disrupted at a subatomic level. That is why Dean is sick. They were...adjusting themselves, his atoms I mean."

Sam's surprise showed in his raised brow and wide eyes. Speechless, he tried to figure out which part to query first but Jack interrupted him.

"It was a nice wedding, they had blue flowers." He declared, then promptly passed out.

Sam's eyes grew wider. "Right…"

Dean crawled back to the chair taking the bin with him.

Cas picked Jack up and carried him to his room, everything had finally taken its toll on the Nephilim. Dean was a little worried but Cas reassured him that Jack was going to be fine. Dean could feel the trepidation radiating from him though. Cas was hoping there was no permanent damage but he didn't know, no one did. Dean hoped Jack would bounce back like he usually did then relaxed into his chair and closed his eyes.

Sam examined him as he joined the table in the library. "You look like crap."

Dean smiled with his eyes closed, "Thanks, Sammy." He felt like it.

"So what did Cas say about you and him being married?" Sam laughed and Dean could hear the smile. "Because I really need to hear about that, I really do."

"Can I relax for five seconds? That portal-shazam crap feels like being thrown into a wood-chipper."

"Sure, you want a drink?" Sam asked and Dean nodded.

Cas interrupted them, "I brought beer, whiskey and water. What would you like Dean?"

The smile snuck onto his face before he could stop it.

"Beer-" His stomach growled its objections and he grimaced, "-Water, please Cas."

"Okay Cas, spill…" Sam pushed.

Cas started with their landing in Otherworld and the other Sam appearing. Sam followed in avid fascination as Cas explained the dynamic between the other him and Dean.

"Wait...hang on...So they're together, together?" Sam clarified, understanding yet not processing.

"Yes, they were romantically involved. Married." Cas clarified.

Dean had his arms crossed and was bent over the table resting his head, eyes closed. The world had stopped spinning, finally but he was so tired that his eyes ached. Whatever had happened with his atoms made him feel like he hadn't slept in days.

"So...wait wait...do you guys? I mean… do you have…" Sam started and Cas went quiet. "..you know...feelings..."

"Sammy, you need to be quiet for like, ever," Dean growled. There was a smile in Sam's tone but this wasn't a funny topic for Dean right at this moment.

"What? I shouldn't ask? Like you wouldn't if I was the one married to Cas in an alternate reality."

Something behind Dean's ribs got tight. Whatever it was it did not like that sentence at all.

"Dean...did you-" Sam paused sounding incredulous, "-did you just growl at me?"

Dean startled upright, his vision blurred. "What? No! I coughed..."

A fuzzy Sam glared, "Dude, that was a growl."

"Shut up, Sam." Then he returned his head to his arms.

Dean had definitely growled, what was he, a werewolf? Damn it, he needed to stop that and he rubbed his ribs trying to push the feeling away. He was not jealous, territorial maybe...that wasn't better he thought then winced.

Cas stared at them both as Sam recovered from the shock and Dean avoided the conversation.

"Bobby was alive," Cas interjected trying to break the tension.

Sam snapped his head toward the angel. "Like our Bobby? He knew us?"

Cas nodded, "and Charlie, Jo, Ellen…"

Sam gaped at him and Cas finished the rest of that part of the story.

"Wow." Sam glanced at his brother, "Just wow, that's nuts."

Dean listened as Cas described their adventure and wished for a months worth of sleep. His arm was going numb so he excused himself to the lounge that they'd created in one of the rooms. Glancing at the vomit was a bad idea and he took a deep shuddering breath as he walked, he'd deal with it later.

Cas and Sam followed after a few minutes but diverted to clean the library. Dean could hear clunking, cursing and scrubbing. Once done, they came to the lounge and sat in the armchairs across from the black leather sofa.

Dean drank a beer and managed to keep it down, small mercies. The nausea passed and his stomach rumbled for food but at that moment being still was more important. Moving was bad and now he was lying down he didn't know if he actually could move.

Cas explained to Sam what happened to Dean in hell and got wide eyes for his trouble.

"Wait, you've known this the whole time?" Sam growled.

"Look who's growling now." Dean laughed.

"You're okay with this?" The tone was a snap.

"No, but I can't change it. "

"We discussed it," Cas interjected looking sheepish.

Sam glared at him and huffed, resigned. If Dean had let it go, forgive him then there would be no further discussion because everyone else was expected to simply fall in line.

Sam smiled in spite of himself as his mind wandered to married Dean and Cas. He wondered whether there was more at play here, more than friendship but then dismissed it. Though, the idea lingered in the back of his mind and kept the smile on his face despite his annoyance.

Cas changed the subject and reassured Dean that his atoms were all back to normal then continued his tale. When he got to the part about Jack and the angel burning Sam piped up. "You know what's weird?"

"You mean apart from everything? No Sammy what's weird?" Dean smirked then stretched on the black leather couch with his arm thrown over his eyes. It was unnecessary because the only light was from a lap in the corner which was relatively dim.

"I could have sworn I heard you snoring the other night from your room. But when I looked, nothing...I don't know what I expected but I could have sworn I heard you."

"I don't snore…" Dean replied, indignant.

"Wasn't really the point I was making Dean."

Cas looked spooked but said nothing.

Dean remembered his weird Dream and felt sick. No, there was no way he'd crossed back here on his own. He peered at Cas. "Cas?"

"I'm just glad we got back when we did, that's all."

Dean nodded and pushed the fear back. He didn't want to know. No more weird today he couldn't deal so he ignored it and relaxed just glad to be home. This universe had its issues but it was his. It made sense, well, mostly. Who was he kidding? This place was insane but it was Dean's insane.

Once Cas had wrapped up his tale, Sam asked a zillion questions and eventually, once satisfied, he left for bed. Cas watched TV and Dean drank a shot of whiskey then fell asleep on the couch.

Cas woke him not long after and prompted him to go to bed. He dragging himself out of the chair and stumbled through the door following Cas. The angel went to check on Jack. Dean yawned, needing sleep but then decided to stay. They leaned on either side of the door frame and watched their boy. Jack was one of the most powerful beings in existence, and he had exhausted himself by saving them, again. They smiled together.

Dean spoke first, "He'll be okay?"

"Yes, his grace is low and he needs time but, he saved us, Dean. I'm still not sure how. He's...special."

Dean nodded and watched Cas watch Jack sleeping. The love in Cas's eyes, in his whole being, was something amazing to Dean. Once upon a time, love had been a distant and unattainable dream for the angel. Cas had always been unique, there was no doubt about that but angels didn't love, couldn't love but Cas did. It was all over his face, love, gratitude and reverence. That twist behind his ribs appeared again and he tried to ignore it.

"Yeah, he's something alright, definitely saved our bacon back there."

Cas nodded and gave a tightlipped smile.

"That's it, I'm hitting the hay." Dean breathed, running a hand over his face.

"Dean?"

"Yeah Cas?" He yawned.

Castiel was awkward like he wanted to ask something but didn't know how.

"Just spit it out Cas." Dean prompted, the tone laden with exhaustion.

"You comforted me, the other me when he was upset…"

Dean did not like where this was going at all.

"...I heard what you said about always forgiving me…" He swallowed hard. "...did you mean that?"

Dean took a deep shuddering breath and nodded. Cas looked at him with something close to longing. Dean's heart throbbed. Shit, these feelings were going to be the end of him. His hands started to shake and it travelled up his arms then into his chest until his heart was racing.

Could he do this?

Should he do this?

The conflict was tearing him up. He could walk away, right now and ignore it all. Tomorrow was a new day and he could just forget all this happened and everything would go back to normal. 'You're lying to yourself again' that little voice whispered. Nothing would ever be normal again; he just wasn't ready to face it yet.

Feelings and thoughts that he didn't know how to deal with were fighting for space in his heart. Hell, in his life. He replayed his time in Otherworld, felt how he had then. D2 had explained how and why he adored this being in front of him so much. The annoying part was that he, honest to god, couldn't disagree. It messed with how he saw himself, with who he thought he was.

Shit.

He nearly walked away. Nearly. He was so ready too... but then he looked at Cas, really looked at him and dared himself to do what his double had suggested. He was many things, but he wasn't a coward, maybe tomorrow but not right now. Dean imagined the bedroom, seeing them together and how he'd felt. Then he thought about the hot tub dream and the kissing, the touching and the flirting. Was he bothered? No, not really. It scared him that he wasn't bothered, it scared him that he enjoyed it. There were lines he didn't have any idea if he could cross or wanted to… but he could admit that he wasn't upset by it. That actually he'd enjoyed some of it.

On that thought, he moved.

Cas pressed his back against the door frame as he watched Dean move closer. His bright eyes going wide as the gap closed to mere inches.

The angels' trench coat brushed against Dean's chest.

Ah Hell... he was going to do this. Shit.

Dean placed his calloused hands on Castiel's face and pushed the doubt away. 'If we're doing this' he thought, 'we're doing it whole hog.' Cas's dark stubble scratched the hard skin on his palms as he steeled himself. Dean didn't feel anything but curiosity as he gazed as Cas...well there was the need, the ache in his heart, in his groin...but he ignored those. One thing at a time...

Cas was confused and asked, "Dean, what are you..."

Dean closed the gap and their lips came together in a tender press. When Cas kissed him back it was like those songs about thunder and lightning. Like a whisper of angelic symphonies in his heart. Cas's mouth opened in surprise. Both had their eyes closed and for several long seconds, Dean kissed his best friend. It was electricity and fire and perfection. His heart raced and he could feel Cas trembling under his hands.

Whether for fear of breaking the moment or shock, Cas stayed frozen to the spot. Their noses touched as they kissed and Cas felt the gravity of the moment swallow him whole.

Dean pressed harder, Cas's back dug into the wood of the door. Dean's tongue flicked between Cas' soft lips into his mouth. The angel groaned then returned it. As Cas realised this might be his only opportunity to do this he wrapped his arms around the taller man. He pulled him close and prayed that it wouldn't scare his hunter into bolting. Cas sagged into Dean, his whole body relaxing and igniting at the same time. He gripped Dean's t-shirt like it was a lifeline, the hard muscle underneath making him pant with need. Those shoulders were perfection.

They were all open mouths, tongues and nibbling at lips. It was hot and heavy and Dean's cock was throbbing in his pants. Cas' dick was a hard reminder pressed between them. It should have freaked Dean out but it made him horny and he groaned. The whole thing felt like it lasted an eternity. Then Dean broke away leaving Cas shocked and breathless. He took a second to orientate himself and breathe.

"I might be delirious or atom-broken..." Dean whispered as he rubbed his thumb over Cas lower lip the other hand still on his face. "...but Cas?"

Cas stared at him, his skin flushed and sweaty and he nodded almost imperceptibly.

"I wanted you to know that I see you." He smiled, and then pulled away, shaking.

Dean turned to go to his room, leaving a flustered and hopeful angel in his wake. He could still feel Cas' skin on his, the brush of clothes against his chest and the thought made him smile. Content and happy for the first time in, well... a long time, he stripped off and folded his clothes. The sheets on the floor would have to do for tonight, shaking them he climbed into bed. 'Wow, just wow' he thought as he pressed his fingers against his warm lips. Nothing had ever been that good, ever. Laughing into the darkness in disbelief, he couldn't believe he'd actually done that.

What was happening to him?

Breathing deeply he tried to relax. Glad to be back in his bed. Rest was evasive at first, and then he felt a ruffle of breeze and knew Cas was there. Tonight it made him smile, really smile. A moment later exhaustion swamped him and Dean drifted into a peaceful sleep.

He wouldn't remember it but he dreamt. Not of horrors or burning wings but of smiling and laughter. It was a glorious dream of a hunter and an angel as they skied on fresh snow under a perfect blue sky.

****Epilogue****

Days passed and everything fell back into the normal rhythm of things. Jack recovered fully with no side effects and they were all thankful for that. Dean's PTSD eased and he and Sam started to hunt again. They had been on one such mission that day, a simple vampire nest that Jodie had helped with. Driving back, Dean decided to broach a topic which had been plaguing him since that kiss with Cas.

"Sammy," Dean whispered as he stared into the midnight darkness of the highway.

"Yeah?" His brother replied as he lent against the window trying to get some shut-eye.

"... You know when we got back from the Otherworld..."

"Yeah?"

Dean cringed, not knowing how to word it.

"Dean, what is it?"

"You asked about feelings...you know me and ..." Dean ran his hand over his face, damn it why was this so hard?

"Cas? You and Cas...yeah what about it?"

Sam was intrigued but stayed silent against the glass. Anything could spook his brother who was clearly nervous.

"Would it bother you?" Dean glanced at Sam and it was so quick Sam almost missed it. "If I was...if ... we..."

Sam smiled inside at the physical pain this seemed to be causing Dean. Wow, this almost never happened, his brother uncomfortable and unsure. "If you got together you mean?" Sam clarified keeping his face relaxed.

Dean gave a tight almost imperceptible nod.

"No. It'd be nice." Sam put it out there like a candle in the night. This could backfire and he knew it but it was worth the risk.

"N-nice?" Dean sputtered as his hands set in a death grip on the steering wheel.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, it'd be nice to see you happy that's all. You're always happy when Cas is here...so ...yeah, nice."

Dean smiled, one of those lopsided 'I'm trying not to smile' smiles.

"Yeah...I just wanted to check. You know..." Dean said clearing his throat.

Sam smiled as Dean went back to driving in silence and fell asleep with it playing on his lips.

The conversation they'd had in the Impala seemed to come of nothing. It was two days later was when Sam noticed the change in his brother.

Cas and Dean were sharing the couch in the lounge. It was unusual, normally Dean would hog it and Cas sat on the chair. It was different but not enough to make him look twice. Sam sat on his chair to the right and picked up a book. Cas and Dean watched some medical show, that one they'd been stuck in that time and everything was just, normal. Dean was at one end, Cas at the other and for twenty minutes they relaxed as Dean explained the show to Cas.

Then out of nowhere Dean turned to Cas and said. "You can move closer you know, I don't bite."

Cas' eyes went wide, "Ah...okay Dean," and he shuffled closer to the hunter, then relaxed back into the sofa cushions.

"No..." Dean groaned, exasperated. Cas frowned, unsure of what he'd done wrong. Sam watched over the lip of his book with avid fascination, terrified to say or do anything. Was this actually happening?

"...How am I supposed to explain it with you so far away? Sam will moan any minute about the talking interrupting his nerd time..." Dean scooted next to the angel. They were shoulder to shoulder and Cas became rigid. "That's better," Dean said as he reclined back.

"Dean..." Cas started leaning forward, "Don't you want your personal space?"

Dean turned, glanced at Cas and smiled as he shuffled to get comfy in the cushions.

"Do you?"

Cas glanced at Sam, unsure of what the correct answer was.

Dean huffed, "It's not a big deal Cas. Just relax." He tapped the gap for him to recline into the space.

Cas' eyes darted from Sam to Dean but Dean was watching the TV waiting for Cas to make the next move. Dean draped his arm over the back of the couch and the one closest to Cas rested on his knee. He crossed his ankle over it becoming more settled.

Sam met Cas' eyes and he shrugged not knowing what to do either. Cas frowned at the taller brother, Sam winked and then nodded. The angel nodded in response and then relaxed next to Dean. It felt so good being this close, like two magnets that had to touch. Which is what Dean did moments later when he felt the tension ebb from Cas.

Sam's eyes grew to the size of saucers as the next minutes unfolded.

Dean closed the gap between him and Cas to nothing, his black t-shirt pressing against the Angels' coat.

"Cas, you know you don't have to wear your coat inside..." Dean commented his eyes fixed on the TV.

Cas glanced at Sam again and he nodded so the angel leaned forward and removed the trench, draping it over the arm of the couch.

"Cool. Better." Dean added and then closed the gap again. Sam's jaw dropped as he watched his brother drape his head onto Cas shoulder. Dean made it look like it was the most normal thing in the world. Cas flinched and his expression screamed 'deer in headlights'.

Sam could only stare uselessly as Cas made eye contact with him over Dean's head.

The look said it all, 'What the hell do I do?' There was silence with the exception of the TV and Dean's occasional laughter.

"Oh, I like this one." Dean commented, "Dr Sexy operates on a supermodel, it's hilarious."

Cas nodded but had no words. Sam watched them over his book, frozen.

Ten minutes passed like that. Dean ignored the elephant in the room, while Cas and Sam shared confused glances.

"You guys need to stop." Dean interrupted a few minutes later.

"What? Stop what?" Sam said startled.

Dean didn't look at either of them, just spoke.

"Looking at each other like that." The tone was dead-pan, no humour at all.

"Like what? I'm not looking at anyone. Cas?"

Cas shook his head, "No...I'm watching Dr Sexy, Dean."

Dean smiled; it was fleeting as he tried to remain serious. He enjoyed the feel of Cas shoulder under his cheek and really didn't want to move.

"So we're all good?"

There was silence as Cas built up his courage, "Err, Dean...Just one question?"

"Yes, Cas," Dean answered watching the TV like it was the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen. This question could make or break the situation and they all knew it.

"Does this mean...I mean... I don't understand..." Cas grimaced as he kept himself from moving. Any move would bring his face closer to Dean's head and he was terrified to do the wrong thing. This was all he'd ever wanted and he could feel Dean's happiness, he really didn't want to break it.

Dean feigned exasperation, "Well I kissed you and now we're hanging out on the couch watching the most awesome TV show ever made..." Dean glanced up at him and smiled, "...does that help?"

Cas' jaw fell. They hadn't spoken about that kiss since it happened. He glanced at Sam who had dropped all pretence of reading at this stage and was gawking, with his jaw on the carpet.

"You kissed him?" Sam exclaimed unable to keep it inside.

Dean shrugged and glanced at Sam. "Yeah... Problem?"

Sam tried to find something to say but the only thing that he came up with was, "No. No problem." Then he raised his book to hide the shocked expression.

"Good, now that's settled can I watch my show please?"

"Uh huh," Sam replied still regrouping.

Dean snuggled into Cas' shoulder and whispered, "You can relax. I'm okay. It's okay."

Cas looked down to meet Deans gaze and felt a hand on his. Dean laughed at the shock filling his face. "Are you okay?" He whispered and Cas nodded. "Good," and Dean snuggled back into his shoulder chuckling at something the TV was saying.

Cas didn't know what the future held but one thing was certain; nothing was ever going to be the same again.