50 Ways to Piss Off Ike
Disclaimer: I do not own Super Smash Brothers, SEGA Superstar Tennis or Sonic Underground. They go to Nintendo and SEGA. Sun-Wong, Mcenche, Himeno, Li, Isaak, Aqua, Pepper, Saber, Rita, Kaguju and Ian are mine.
Summary: While Red was waiting for his friends, he decided to prank Ike without Sonic and it doesn't go as well as he wants it to. Later in the night, a thief attempts to steal the ring and Pit breaks out of his kind character revealing a different side of him.
Chapter 12: Olimar's Prank
Because of how well Ash has been doing in Smash Brothers as of late, it was his turn to select the two people he could bring to the mansion. Ash already had a good idea on who to bring over. Originally he was going to bring Brock and Dawn, but because they had things to do with their life, Ash thought he would call the people from Pallet Town to come over. The two people who were named Blue and Green by the audience went by Gary Oak and Leaf. They were two of Ash's many friends in Pallet Town. Those two got a head start on their journey though leaving Ash with his Pikachu to start with. Now though, Gary stopped being a trainer to become a Pokémon Researcher and while Leaf was still traveling the regions (apparently, she was in this French region when he called her), she was thinking about settling down with a non-Pokémon related job.
While he was waiting for the two to arrive, Red decided to move toward his plans of pissing off Ike. Ever since yesterday, Sonic had been rather quiet. Yes he would hang out with his siblings for the rest of the day, but apparently due to Ike's rescue, Sonic wanted to leave the bluenette alone. Red wasn't going to have any of that and as the second in command in this operation, he would continue. But probably for Sonic's sake, the idea wouldn't be too extreme like nailing Ike's cape to the wall. That in itself was hilarious but Ike didn't find his cape getting staples that funny.
This was why someone like Olimar needed to be recruited for today. The plan was simple. Olimar would get his Pikmin to raid Ike's closet and steal all of his clothes while he went into the shower. This would leave him with nothing but a towel retrieving all of his clothes.
Ike had been neglecting his morning exercises ever since the pranks started. Shadow screwing him over yesterday was minor in comparison and unlike other examples; Shadow did not get away with his little prank. As a result, Shadow would not be able to participate in battle as an assist. Rogue and Shade found this amusing especially since the black hedgehog was someone who would not get caught with participating in some fun times. Ike wouldn't get anything out of him on who the mastermind of this whole pissing contest was. So today, he would clear his mind before something happened to him. Perhaps if he swung his sword in the morning, he would be more alert when his training section was over.
The bluenette trained in the garden where he wasn't the only one who had the idea. The ice angel Mcenche was also swinging his sword. The two would end up engaging in a quick spar hopefully without destroying any of the flowers (if Mcenche did that though, Rita wouldn't let him hear the end of it).
Red spied on the bluenette the entire time before he decided it was time to go shower.
"Olimar, this is where you come in."
Olimar was rather silent but given Ike had been someone who had trampled on Pikmin one time too many, the space man would agree to joining in rather easily.
Red was ready with a camera and everything. If pictures got leaked of Ike in a towel, then Ike's fanbase would increase. Plus, he had to show what he did to Sonic today given his current isolation. Turning him into an adult was simply not enough now.
Ike shivered feeling that someone was watching him. Turning around, he saw no one was in the hallway when he went back into his room. Pit wasn't there like he normally would be in the morning. The angel apparently had to do something in the upper levels concerning the other angels that were crashing in the mansion. Whatever it was, it was of the most importance. This left Ike alone to ponder about what occurred yesterday. He went into the shower and left it cold so he could easily cool off.
"Now go Olimar."
Olimar blew a whistle and the Pikmin stormed the room. The Pikmin were rather quiet with stealing Ike's clothes that Ike wouldn't notice when watching his hair. He was someone who went in, rubbed some soap all over his body and then come back out. The fact Olimar summoned the entire Pikmin army said a lot about how he was ready for revenge. Some of the Pikmin threw his clothes out the window if it were too heavy but everything else was taken out of the room…but this meant Pit's clothes were being stolen as well as Olimar gave the specific order to throw all the clothes out so Ike would have to run around the mansion collecting it.
Once the water turned off, the Pikmin were quick to scatter along with Olimar taking his leave. Red stayed behind to see Ike's reaction though and sure enough he threw a long string of curse words.
"Are you fucking kidding me?! This early in the morning?! Who the hell is up this early to screw with me?! And Pit too?! Come on!"
Red peaked behind the hallway waiting for Ike to storm out with just his towel. The Pokémon Trainer though would not get any nudity though since the Pikmin left one boxer for Ike to wear with his towel. Now that was just too sexy and not enough pissing…
Dammit…I guess I can't do it without Sonic after all. Damn it all!
Red sighed in defeat as he waited outside for his friends who finally showed up. His cheeks puffed up seeing Blue with his cocky expression. Leaf in comparison was aloof in comparison and just waved with him, but didn't seem to want to smile.
"Ashy-boy, we're here. Thanks for the invite." Gary said with a smirk. "Now that I'm here though, you don't have to battle anymore because I'll win for you."
"Hey…are you implying I can't hold my own weight?" The Pokémon Trainer questioned annoyed. "Look, I made it up the ranks so I can get you two here! Don't get cocky."
"Wonder how long that will last…" Leaf snarked.
"Hey!"
Ash was so busy dealing with his friends; he didn't notice this was the beginning of a stakeout. A raccoon, turtle and hippo were watching from the sides waiting for the chance to strike.
The incident about Ike's clothes spread throughout the mansion. Sonic just wanted to facepalm at Ash's attempt to do it himself. It was a bigger failure when Pit was involved despite making it clear they would do nothing to harm the sweet angel.
The white angel acted like he was horrified but the look on his face made it obvious he wanted to shoot the person who thought this was a good idea. All of his tunics were spread out throughout the mansion in rapid succession and if it weren't for him ordering the royal bodyguards around, it would have taken the whole day. He didn't even want to ask the dark angel or the fire angel to assist him because they were laughing at him the entire time. If Pepper found his boxers, she would be the first to let him know he wasn't getting them back. Why did she need his boxers that he wore multiple times? That rotten girl…
As for Li, he just wanted to laugh at him for the type of boxers rather than stealing them. Pit grumbled at how now some of the Smashers found out he had boxers of food on them specifically ice cream, chicken and other sweets. This made him appear more kiddy and got him sympathy. Ike in comparison had "manly" boxers so putting them side by side made Pit appear immature.
It took most of the day to get everything with breaks in between and they didn't even find the culprit (well Sonic did but Red admitted he screwed up asking Olimar because he wasn't specific so they wouldn't talk about this incident to anyone). Ike's temper would have been worse if Pit wasn't assisting him. The angel's presence calmed him down from the childish prank again.
"Sorry Pit. I didn't think they would go after you this time too."
"No…this prank was poorly done. They probably didn't know which closet was yours and just took everything."
Ike just sighed in defeat at this statement. So much for not being pranked…
With the help of some of the other Smashers like Peach and Marth especially, the two were able to retrieve their clothes, folded and refreshed thanks to Peach's detergent. Peach made the extra effort to wash those clothes given some were on the rosebuds, some were in the trees and some ended up in places they shouldn't be…like Wario's room (Pit would never forgive that person for that).
"I can't believe I wasted the whole day looking for my clothes…" Pit mumbled darkly to himself.
"Pit did you say something?"
"N-No. I'm just glad we were able to find everything in one piece."
"Well yeah…I mean your blue tunic is to be desired thanks to it ending up in Wario's room, but I'm certain if you washed it more times, the garlic smell will be gone."
Ike was way too nice for his own good. The brunette frowned when Ike turned his back on him. Maybe he needed to be the one to tell him the truth before things got worse. The angel didn't want to do. He was too tired today from being made fun of and how he would have to have a late discussion about what to do with that ring. Master was too busy setting things up for Red's friends that he wouldn't be looking into it either. Plus there was the whole thing with Sonic and the Mobians.
Maybe tomorrow will be better. The angel thought to himself as he started to put his clothes back in. Looking outside though, he thought he saw a spark in the trees. It was probably nothing…
"I can't fucking believe this!"
Sonic got off his computer to see what Fox was complaining about. Despite the clothing hunt, nothing interesting was going on besides who was going to bring the guest in tomorrow. Apparently Wolf was below Red and that was a huge blow to Fox's pride. Fox who had been there from the beginning was right below him in terms of ranking and he wasn't a happy fox.
"Fox, chill. It was just by one point."
"It's not about the point! It's about who Wolf intends to bring!"
"He can only bring two people, right?"
"He can, but if he brings Panther, Krystal is coming too!"
Sonic's eyes widened seeing the distraught look in Fox's eyes.
"Umm…was Krystal your…girlfriend?"
Fox didn't respond. Instead he went over to his pillow and punched it rather hard. The blue hedgehog ended up staring at the computer screen again to not see his older roommate vent. Sonic didn't understand what was going on.
"…We broke up." Fox finally said after taking his frustration out on the pillow. "I told her I didn't want her in harms way and kicked her off the team…and she spites me by going over to Star Wolf and staying even after the conflict was resolved…"
"Fox…"
"Falco told me that if I got back with her, things would only be worse if something like this happened again. I didn't think I deserved her courtship so of course I didn't hook up with her again…but it meant losing a friend…"
The blue hedgehog got up from the chair but stopped realizing he had no idea how he was going to comfort the leader of Star Fox. He wasn't good with tears and he wasn't good with romance. Fox was suffering from heartbreak from the latter and all he could do is stand there like an idiot.
"Sorry Sonic. It's nothing you should be concerned about."
"…You won't fight if she shows up here, right?"
"…No…I won't…"
Fox's voice was unsure of himself. Sonic feared the worse the next couple of days. His own heart was beating fast ready to rip itself out of his body. Sonic feared the something would involve him. After Ike saved him, he didn't want to do any adventurous things. That's kind of why he neglected his siblings today and allowed them to hang out with Shadow's group instead. He told them he'd be ready to show off how awesome he is in Smash tomorrow, so he had to be prepared. All he could do now was pray nothing would go down…
Pit yawned as he decided to get a midnight snack. The royal bodyguards were driving him insane with their constant presence and pressure to leave Smash Brothers Mansion to find the rest of the artifacts. Sun-Wong warned him that all five items needed to be found to prevent anything terrible from going down. The angel only saw these items used for sex and just an excuse to get sex toys without embarrassing themselves in the store.
He told Mcenche to make an ice copy of the ring, but no one would be that stupid especially since Mcenche did a poor job replicating the item. Once Pit got his snack, he would check up on the ring and probably switch it out with something more convincing. If anyone caught him, the innocent angel persona he has kept around the mansion would shatter immediately. It's not to say he wasn't innocent. He just liked acting like this the best around humans because its what they expect. The royal bodyguards were going to break his façade the longer he stayed…and he didn't want it to break when next to Ike. He liked Ike a lot and seeing his friend being harassed was worrying him. If he did a little more observing though, he probably would have figured out who it was.
The angel went into the room where the ring was placed. He expected it to be in the same spot. What he didn't expect though was someone hovering over it when he opened the door.
"What the?"
Pit got a good look even though it was dark. From the back, it looked like a raccoon with grey fur and black stripes. He looked to be around twenty years old from the angel's observation but age really wasn't a thing angels cared about unless it concerned getting into bars in the human world. He had a red leg pouch attached to his thigh. Apparently, the angel's appearance caught him off guard because he jumped back after thawing out the ring. The angel glanced up quickly to see how this raccoon thief got in and apparently this room had a vent…
"…Bently…I might have been spotted."
"Not a problem Sly. Its just a kid you can knock out."
The angel frowned seeing the raccoon thief not taking him seriously. Luckily for him he carried his bow on his back, so getting it out surprised him even more.
"…You're not leaving with that ring."
"Oh? The kid has a glow in the dark bow. How charming."
Oh Pit didn't like him already.
"Drop it."
"I would like to, but kids shouldn't be holding onto rings until they are a few years older. I'll take my leave."
Nope, Pit wasn't going to let this raccoon waltz out even if the ring was fake! This raccoon insulted his age and put him into the child category. He fired the arrow at an alarming speed causing the raccoon to side step at the last minute. If he couldn't go through the vent or the front door, he took the back window. The angel expected that though and charges him. The raccoon was caught off guard a third time when the angel tackled him out the window causing it to shatter. The intention was to simply open it too to avoid any noise but Pit needed to cause a disturbance as much as possible.
"HEY WHERE ARE YOU ROYAL BODYGUARDS!" Pit screamed intending to get the thief caught after he recovered. "GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED AND HELP ME OUT HERE!"
"Tch…" The raccoon growled as he attempted to sneak away with the ring but Pit intended to engage him in combat. Fighting wasn't his thing unless necessary and this white angel was incredibly loud. "It is way past your bedtime kid."
"Take that back! I'm not a child! I am centuries older than you!"
"Really? Wouldn't know with how you're acting."
The angel split his bow into two blades and clashed with the raccoon's cane. The raccoon was pushed back greatly by the angel's strength.
"Looks like fighting isn't your thing! You picked the wrong angel to mess with!" For whatever reason, Pit thought this would be a good time to taunt and introduce himself. "I am Pit! Servant of the Goddess of Light and head captain of the royal bodyguards! Anyone who steals from us angels are going to have divine justice reigned on you!"
The raccoon was actually trying to run during the speech but another arrow was shot his way and not from the white angel who was too busy making an ass out of himself.
"Idiot! The more you talk, the more you're going to let the furry get away!"
"Oh great another one…" The raccoon grumbled. He was seeing double as there was one with white wings and one with black wings and the one with black wings would have none of this crap.
"Li, I needed to get that out!"
"Yeah, you're voice would wake everyone up, but since that's your plan anyway…" Dark Pit stood in front of the raccoon and smirked. "I'm better at catching rats than my idiot brother. Drop the ring and I won't hurt you too much."
"You're just as cocky as that kid over there." The raccoon snarked. "Angels? Really? I thought angels were more…on the silent side watching from the sidelines."
"Well those are normal angels! Not me!"
Li didn't want to deal with the raccoon and charged him with a bow identical to Pit's. Where was his original weapon was what Pit would have asked but decided to tag team. The raccoon really wasn't expecting this and tried to duck. The dark angel was better at reading his movements in the dark than the light angel who was swinging recklessly. The raccoon blocked with his cane. He had a plan and jumped back waiting for Pit. The light angel glided into the air slightly before attempting to tackle him again.
"Same trick won't work twice."
Pit blinked when he saw the raccoon disappear. He had to stop himself from hitting the ground.
"Huh? Where did he go?"
"Idiot! He's right in front of you!"
The angel shrieked feeling his leg being snagged down by the cane. Caught in the cane, he was thrown into the dark angel, as they were both sent flying into the bushes.
"Oww!"
"Sorry kids, I would like to play more, but I got a ring to make off with."
That's what the raccoon thought he would be able to do but enough noise was made so escape was more difficult. However, there was no such thing as an escape when he looked down and saw that vines came out of the ground and snagged his legs and his tail.
"What?!"
"Captain! I got him!"
Another child came down with green wings. The one with green hair and was the youngest by appearance was being let down along with the help of the lightning angel who immediately pointed his gun at the back of the raccoon's head.
"Good job Rita. Now go help ze captain and Li-Li."
"O-Okay…"
"Tch…how many bird people are there? Bently, why didn't your censors detect them? Bently?"
"So you did have friends." Isaak questioned him. "Just a reminder zat Kaguju and the others found out already. You zree aren't going anywhere."
Well so much for a successful heist.
"Drop your cane."
Not like he had a choice to drop it and lift his hands above his head.
"Good, at least someone listens to me."
Rita assisted Pit and Li off the ground. The dark angel ended up smacking Pit in the back of the head for that poor performance.
"Just be glad your idiot boyfriend didn't see this."
"He's not my…"
"I'll take zat ring now." Isaak hummed as he searched the raccoon's pocket for the ring. Isaak hummed getting it out. He wanted to hold the ring for a while. However his eyes widened when he grabbed it and it melted in his hands. "What…"
"Isaak, I told you it was a fake!" Pit shouted. "You don't hold onto it like that."
There was a really long pause from the raccoon thief. Li could only laugh seeing the face he had in that moment.
"Guess our thief didn't know it was a fake either. Mcenche is a genius after all."
"You got to be kidding me…" The raccoon mumbled. "So much for that…"
The white angel wanted to keep scolding the blonde when someone zoomed into the garden. Well the Smashers were definitely awake now.
"Pit, what happened? Something broke and I heard you screaming your mouth off. That's not like you."
Li snickered at how Sonic described the white angel. Pit's demeanor changed seeing the blue hedgehog…it went back to his innocent naïve self.
"Sorry Sonic…I panicked and that's all I could think of."
"But what was with that speech?"
"Speech? Well…that's kind of what I wanted to say to a villain. Heh heh…"
"Oh so you're going to play the innocent angel after what you did."
Pit glared daggers at the raccoon. Once Kaguju came back with the other two, they would go to the top floor and deal with this. Sonic gasped looking at who it was.
"No way…it can't be…"
The raccoon looked at the hedgehog and he too was surprised.
"Oh so you're the one…"
"You're Sly Cooper the Phantom Thief!"
Me: TBC 4311 with words.
Li: From the ashes, this story rose from the dead. Six years.
Me: Sorry…I doubt it will ever be done though. Sometimes I wish there was a quicker way to write faster or a device that could allow me to speak and it prints the words out for me instead. I keep hurting my index finger not just from typing but also from glass shattering on it. I need to remind everyone that because of this long wait for one chapter, the way the entire story will play out is different now and the biggest change is the pairings and the OC characters. On my profile, the confusing love drama is between Fox, Falco, Red, Sonic, Ike and Pit (but maybe Pit's not involved, who knows). Its not a set pairing as it is now. OC characters got added and replaced like my friend Par's character due to her destroying Haruhi to create a new OC. This story is still a dramedy though. Notes!
1. Ash never meets Leaf in the anime but because Ash is Red, he can meet Blue (Gary) and Green. This means the way I write Leaf is based on my interpretation of how she would be in the anime and not the manga. I also implied that she went to Kalos. I cannot mention anything after 2008 but any subtle reference is fine.
2. Pit's personality…well there were hints in the story Pit was faking his happy go lucky persona. Instead of being moody and dark like in Fallen Angel, he's hiding his arrogance and something else. The Smashers haven't caught on of course.
3. Sly Cooper and the gang are the thieves doing the stakeout and were hired by the mysterious person. Of course, they don't seem to be listening to that guy and went straight to stealing and used it as an excuse. Sly is never referred to as a Phantom Thief. Sonic just called him that just now.
Well the mystery will keep going from here. I wonder how many people left after neglecting the story. Reviews are appreciated and if you still have ideas of pranks, just write them in the review. Ja ne!
