"YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!"
"That guy's a jerk," Amethyst whispered into Xander's ear, obviously not understanding the gravity of the situation.
"What did you just say?" Arceus questioned, his gaze firmly fixed on Amethyst.
"She called you a jerk!" Xander yelled. He could've sworn he saw smoke coming out of his ears and his face turning red, but it was probably just his imagination. Yes, Xander has an imagination. Deal with it.
"Why you little… First you break into my vault and now you dare to insult me?" Xander was certain he saw smoke this time, but not only did it come from his ears. No, it also blew out of his nose. Amethyst apparently noticed this too, as she was looking fearfully back at Xander.
"I think you're making him angry, Xander. Well, more angry than he already was. Which was already pretty angry. That makes him...extremely angry, Xander! You must end the madness!" Amethyst pleaded, whilst simultaneously shoving more treasure into her bags.
Xander suddenly got a distant look in his eyes and he began staring out into the distance. "Amethyst...there is only one way, a single option we have, to end this madness. We must devise a plan to defeat the supreme god that's so crazy it just might work." Xander looked to Amethyst. "That's where you come in."
Amethyst gasped "M-me? I don't know, Xander. This may be out of my control! The madness of this situation exceeds the maximum amount of craziness I can retain!" Amethyst exclaimed.
"We must do it, Amethyst. For me. So I can live."
This seemed to give Amethyst the courage to stand against Arceus. "You're right. I will fight with you, Xander."
Xander nodded and looked to all of the other inhabitants of the vault. "Will you join us, unnamed townsfolk?"
The townsfolk looked a little bit uneasy about the situation. Well, they did before someone appeared out of nowhere and screamed, "YEAH!"
"Yeah!" The townsfolk screeched in unison.
Xander nodded his thanks to them and turned to Arceus. "You… Can you give us a second?"
"Take all the time that you need."
Xander nodded his than—
"Ha! I was just kidding! You only have half a second! That'll show you!" Arceus laughed hysterically, rolling onto his back and gasping for breath.
"Well, guys," Xander said, turning back to his crew, "I think I can safely say we have well over half a second." His incredibly agreeable crew nodded their agreement.
Xander looked to Amethyst, whom simply nodded and said, "Huddle."
The Pokémon all formed a shoulder-to-shoulder group, creating a circular gaggle of Pokémon. "Here's the plan," said Xander, "I distract the probably fake all supreme god over there by throwing gold and jewels at him while you guys try to figure out what's really going on. That way we can resolve the issue more quickly."
Amethyst donned a skeptical expression. "I don't know...seems kind of...simple."
"Do you have any other ideas, Amethyst?" Xander asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yes...WE KILL HIM WITH FIRE!" Amethyst screeched.
"And where do you suppose we'll get that fire?"
Amethyst looked at the rest of their group and realized the only fire type in the room was a magmar. "Oh, well then...proceed."
"I'm gonna need your bags for my plan, Amethyst."
"Okay, but this was a gift from my father. If you break it there's no telling what's going to happen to you," Amethyst stated gravely. Xander accepted these conditions somewhat hesitantly and took the bags. And he was right to be hesitant. This is Amethyst we're talking about.
Xander rolled his eyes and nodded. He turned his head to eye the unreal/real god and said, "On the count of three. One… Two… Three!"
Amethyst jumped ahead of Xander and stuck a paw in the air, yelling, "CHARGE!"
"AHHH!" The team rushed forward, led by Amethyst and her archaic war tactics.
Xander the only one approaching the god, whom was still rolling on the ground laughing hysterically, decided that annoyance was the key to a great distraction. "Hey you, fertilizer for brains!" This caught Arceus' attention. "Why aren't you attacking us yet. It's been way over half a second. Did you…" Xander dramatically gasped, "lie…?" Everyone in the room stopped in their tracks and gasped, then resumed their mission.
That accusation shut up Arceus' annoying laugh and replaced with his slightly less annoying angry voice. "No, I was not lying. You shall meet death today."
"THEN KILL ME!"
"AHHH!" Arceus unleashed a hyper beam from his mouth, hitting the ground right next to Xander. The fact that no debris went flying from the strike went flying wasn't lost on Xander. This was when all the pieces fell into place and Xander knew exactly what was going on.
"Is that your best shot?!"
Arceus growled and fired another shot… It landed five feet away, almost like he was deliberately trying to avoid Xander…
"SPONTANEOUS DISTRACTION!" Xander yelled, pointing somewhere behind Arceus. Somehow, Arceus fell for it and looked behind him. This gave Xander enough time to run up and throw Amethyst's bags at the all powerful supreme god...only to have the bag to go straight through him. "Just as I thought…" Xander mumbled.
"WHAT DID YOU THINK?!" Amethyst screeched from across the vault.
"SHUT UP, AMETHYST!"
"OKAY!"
Xander turned his attention back to the "god," squinting his eyes at him, demanding a challenge, to which Arceus simply squinted back in return. Neither side moved for a few seconds...
Then Arceus flickered out of existence. He just...disappeared! Nowhere to be seen! "Hey," said a random Pokémon from behind a large pile of gold. It was a Magby that wasn't of the highest of IQs…or average IQs, but you get the idea. "I found this guy. He was waving his hands in a really weird way so I knocked him out. Plus he was smoking a cigar and I wanted to prevent secondhand smoke. Hello, this is probably a no smoking building! I probably saved a few lives today." He said proudly
"Good work...Magby," congratulated Amethyst, saluting him.
"Thanks, boss," replied the unnamed magby.
"Is that a drowzee?" Asked another unnamed background character, a clueless diglett.
The magby just shrugged and said, "I don't know."
"Hurry," said Xander, "let's grab the money and get out of here." Amethyst promptly agreed and the Pokémon all ran out to freedom, but not forgetting to do the jump in the air pause thing…and failing miserably. They all just fell to the ground, looked at each other, and then all ran in separate directions.
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"Well, Amethyst, we did it. We robbed the bandits," said Xander. Despite the fact that he disliked the idea from the beginning, he was filled with a great sense of accomplishment.
"Yeah...we're rich!" Amethyst exclaimed exuberantly.
"What are we even going to do with all that money?" Asked Xander incredulously, gesturing to Amethyst's bags.
"I don't know, brag?" Amethyst replied.
Xander paused, then nodded. "Works for me. After all of that, we've definitely earned our bragging rights."
Amethyst put on her thinking face. "Yeah, but...I just have one question; how did you know he wasn't going to kill us?"
"I didn't, I just figured that if I'm going to die, I'm gonna make it quick and take you all down with me."
"Hmm, okay—wait...hey!"
Xander snickered. "Relax, Amethyst. I was just kidding. Probably."
"What do you mean, probably?!"
Xander was going to respond, but something unexpected happened. They started getting pelted with eggs. By policemen. "Get out of our city!"
"Yeah, you don't belong here!"
"You've caused us a lot of trouble!"
Amethyst got slapped in the face by a donut one of the officers threw. "I have very mixed feeling about this," said Amethyst, looking at the donut that was now laying on the ground.
"Let's get out of here, Amethyst!"
Amethyst stared at the donut on the ground for a few more seconds before following Xander.
And the pair ran off into the sunset, away from the torment of eggs and donuts.
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"And we finally accomplished our goal: rob the bandits of their gold. Well, most of it. And by most of it, I mean a very small portion of it," Amethyst explained, her parents staring at her in disbelief and her younger siblings staring at her in wonder. "So that's where I've been for the past week."
"Wow!" Her younger sister named Kila exclaimed, wonder filling the eevee's voice.
"Amazing!" Amethyst's younger brother, Oliver, exclaimed.
"No, this is not amazing," interrupted her father, "this is resentful!"
"Now, I wouldn't go that far," her mother cut in. "Maybe a little disrespectful, or a lot, but not resentful."
The couple then got into a huge argument. Amethyst put her ears down in shame. "Ugh, not again… And this time I'm the cause, not you, Oliver."
"Yep. Isn't it great."
"Nope."
The argument continued. "Why do they have to do this," Kila grunted.
Oliver just shrugged to his older sisters. "I guess arguing is just their nature."
"Mmmmhmmm," Amethyst hummed nodding her head in agreement.
Twenty minutes later, they were still arguing like mad. Amethyst was getting annoyed.
"Well if you wouldn't just lay around around all day—"
"Guys!" Amethyst exclaimed, cutting her mother off. "I am a grown eevee now. I can make whatever life decisions I want to," Amethyst reasoned. "It's great that you still love me enough to...fight about whatever you were fighting about, but I'm not a little kid anymore. Kila though, Kila is a kid. Do this to her all you want."
Kila glared at her sister, Amethyst just sticking her tongue out at her. The parents thought about Amethyst's rationalization, before coming to a conclusion. "No."
"Mom, dad. I am living on my own now. I'm an adult, you can't keep babying me like this," said Amethyst.
"B-but," Chloe responded, now tearing up, "you'll always be my baby."
"No, I really won't be."
"She's right, Chloe," said Jeffrey, ignoring Amethyst's comment. "We can't keep doing this… But we're going to. Because we're terrible."
Chloe nodded in agreement, and, just like that, the two parents went back to arguing about what was best for Amethyst.
Oliver leaned in closer to Amethyst. "I think arguing is how they show that they love others."
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"So how did that talk with your parents go," asked Xander, sitting outside of the lake that Amethyst was bathing in.
"It was...interesting," Amethyst replied.
"How so?"
"Well, After my parents forbade me from ever travelling with you ever again, I stormed off and started a rebellion against their tyranny," Amethyst explained. "They eventually surrendered after we defeated them in a verbal war."
"I wouldn't expect anything less from the family you came from," Xander simply stated.
Amethyst giggled and slowly sunk deeper into the water she was sitting in, sighing in content. "Yeah, we're pretty messed up."
"Well," Xander yawned, his eyes cast upon the position of the setting sun, "I think I'm going to, quite literally, hit the hay."
"Sleep well, Xander!" Amethyst called after Xander, who was walking back to his small cave. Xander simply waved back in response. Amethyst stayed in the water for a little bit longer before getting out, as to be sure she was adequately clean. Being clean is an essential after you spend a few days in a dusty desert with a minimal water supply. New life lesson learned.
Before going to bed though, Amethyst had to do something. Something that she does only once a year. Something that, if done wrong, could be tragic for her. Something that took great skill and precision when not using hands. Making her bed.
Normally, any other person or Pokémon could've easily finished a task like this, as the average bed usually consisted of only hay and a blanket, but Amethyst had her own special process. A process not easy with the use of paws.
She had to rearrange each singular piece of straw in her bed. Surprisingly, this doesn't take very long, even with paws. It's just hard to do
There is no real point in doing this other than to make your hay bed look neat, which is pretty much impossible, but here's what she does anyway. The top layer—the only layer that really matters—is the only thing you need to mess with. You just straighten the hay out in whatever order you want, and then, voilà! Your hay bed is now neat and tidy. Somehow.
Now, with this chore out of the way, Amethyst can finally rest. Yay! Amethyst very carefully laid herself down in her bed, being careful not to disrupt the tidiness too much. She closed her eyes and began dreaming about adventure number three…
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A/N
Yeah, so… That was chapter 12? I didn't expect to make it this far.
With that said, I feel like this chapter took way too long to write. I'm not exactly satisfied with it, and after going through a bit of trial and error and rewriting at least half of it, I decided to leave it at this. Tell me what you think if you want; constructive, not destructive (I know you people are out there…waiting for the right moment to strike...), constructive criticism.
Anyways, thanks for reading and stay tuned for the next chapter, which may be released kind of soon, but maybe not. Adios!
