When Rainlily had awoken, she noticed Cullen was gone, which she was unsure how to feel. She raised a hand to her lips, tracing them as she thought of the small kiss she had given him.
Was he ignoring her?
Was he mad at her?
She groaned heavily as she fell back onto the cot, hearing singing outside the tent "The Dawn Will Come". She looked up in confusion as she climbed off the cot, wrapping the brown wool blanket around her body. She slightly opened the flap of the tent to see the Inquisition soldiers, merchants, and those aiding in the cause, kneeling to her brother. She smiled warmly at the sight, until she heard a very familiar giggle next to her.
"Sneaking out, are ya?" she chuckled as she saw Sera making eye contact with her. "Ya know us hallas, we can't be caged forever." Rainlily teased as she looked around. "Well, come with me. You should at least get some food in that tummy of yours." Sera said as she nodded her head towards Varric, who say near the fire on a log. Rainlily threw the blanket on the cot as she grabbed her dry satchel, and noticed, as she put her satchel on, that she wore a very loose shirt. Just one gust of wind and you were guaranteed a view of her breasts.
Rainlily went back to the same spot she previously opened the tent and was relieved to see Sera still waiting for her. "Sera, could you lend me one of your tunics?" Sera spit out her drink before she looked at her with wide eyes. "One of mine? You don't some fancy pants dress from that Vivienne woman?" Sera asked. Rainlily laughed at her response, "And miss a chance to show nobles I don't care about their opinions? Never. Unless one of them has a whole breast showing, then that's for a separate occasion." Rainlily answered teasingly. Sera laughed as she stood up, opening her bag as she winked at her. "See? This is why I like you! You don't care for those little shits either!" Sera jester as she took out a midnight blue tunic, throwing it to her. "I could've sworn I felt Leliana and Josephine just glare at us with their watchful eyes." Rainlily admitted before closing the flap.
She quickly disposed of the shirt as she slid the tunic on. The top of the tunic was heart shaped, covering her breasts as the sleeves exposed her shoulders as the sleeves ended at her elbows, with thin shoulder straps holding it all together. She left her white nug leather pants on as she slid her black boots on before she exited out of the tent.
"That color looks good on you! Come now, I'm starving!" Sera said, giggling in happiness as she pulled Rainlily by the hand to the fire pit, Varric smiling brightly at the duo. "There you are! I was afraid I had to give the last of the food to the Chargers. Apparently, they get hungry when they drink." Varric explained as he handed Rainlily a bowl. "Iron Bull better be careful, I become deadly when hungry." Rainlily declared as she sat down on the log next to him. "I am deadly when I'm hungry too" Iron Bull's voice whispered in her ear "though, I suspect we are talking about the different kinds of hunger."
Rainlily gasped, blushing madly as Iron Bull sat on her left, glaring at Sera, who was having a laughing fit on the floor. "Let the poor girl get warmed up by the fire before you start your nonsense. You don't want her brother hearing you…" Varric warned him. She giggled as she looked down at her ram soup with potato chunks. "So, how was it in the Commander's tent? You were in there for a pretty long time." Iron Bull asked her, but she chuckled as she took a large scoop of the stew. "Well, you know, being buried in ice tends to tire you out." she teased. "Anything juicy happen?" Varric asked.
She blushed as she looked away from Varric, "I don't know what you mean."
"Ah, Lady Lavellan!" She looked up as she had taken another large spoonful of stew, her spoon in her mouth as she saw Cullen walking towards them. "Hello, Cullen." She said with a smile before taking another spoonful of stew.
"I apologize for leaving, the scout was supposed to alert me if, and when, you awoke." Cullen said as he looked at her for a moment before averting his gaze.
Is he shy?
"You're Commander of the Inquisition forces, I understand, duty calls. I appreciate you taking the time to take care of me." she said warmly as he smirked at her. "It was the least I could do for your brother. He was the one who asked me to take care of you." "Oh…" she frowned as she looked down to her stew. "I didn't mind, of course,-" she shook her head as she put her bowl down near the fire. "I understand, you didn't want to let my brother down. Thank you." she said, refusing to look at him. He felt like he deserved that, not being careful with his words, but Varric cleared his throat as he looked to Rainlily. "Cullen has been waiting for you, though, since we left Haven. He was the one who first saw you." Varric explained, making Rainlily smile to Cullen. "You did?" Cullen nodded, "I was worried about you."
She bit her lower lip, fighting the warmth in her cheeks; she knew she was blushing uncontrollably. He smirked, turning to leave but froze when he saw her attire. "Are you...cold?" she shook her head as she took another spoonful of stew. "Oh no, I'll be fine." Rainlily said softly.
"Are you sure? I have an extra cloak you can use." He asked. Rainlily was about to speak, but Varric leaned towards her. She looked down at him as he whispered, "Just let the poor man get it for you. He really has been worried sick about you all night." Rainlily looked up at Cullen, noticing for the first time his face. He looked at her with concern, his eyes giving away that he was tired but he looked content.
"I actually am cold. Can I borrow your cloak, please?" she asked softly. Before anyone could say another word, he disappeared into his tent. Rainlily picked up her bowl and looked over to Iron Bull with a smile, "You want what's left?" she asked him. Iron Bull's eye sparkled as he took it from her. "Really?" she laughed as she nodded. "You've been eyeballing it since I've been sitting here. Just take it." she answered as she fought with her feelings of nervousness in her stomach. Cullen reappeared sooner than expected and walked straight to her as Iron Bull left her side. He sat beside her as he carefully placed the cloak over her shoulders, smiling as she looked at him with a warm smile. He felt her adjust the cloak, noticing her warm hands resting on his cold hands that were still on her shoulders. "Better?" Cullen asked in a gentle voice, it almost felt affectionate and intimate to her. She noticed he leaned towards her a little and felt the need to do the same. "Yes...thank you for looking out for me, Cullen. I know you didn't have to, but, I really appreciate you taking care of me tonight." She said softly, mimicking his tone as she leaned closer to him. "In truth, Lady Lavellan, I wouldn't rest until I knew you were safe with me. With, uh, us." Cullen said nervously.
Varric coughed suddenly, shocking the pair from their intimate moment. Cullen stood suddenly, rubbing the back of his neck as he usually did when he felt nervous or awkward. "There we go! You look so warm now!" Varric exclaimed as he saw Rainlily wearing the thick cloak. "Thanks" she looked to Varric " Can I ask you something?" Varric smiled and nodded at her request. "How are you so warm?" she asked the dwarf, resting her head against her palm, her elbow resting on her bent knees. "Maybe it's a dwarf thing?" Sera questioned. "Pure coincidence, I assure you." Varric said smoothly, as he noticed Cullen walk to the war table only a few feet away. Rainlily gasped with a look of revelation on her face. "What?" Varric asked with a smirk; he knew this would be interesting. "Your chest hair is what keeps you warm, isn't it?"
Sera fell over laughing, Iron Bull spit out his food, and poor Cullen looked amused as they heard her declaration. Varric and Rainlily started laughing at there sudden reaction, later joined by the Sera and Iron Bull in laughter. "Where, in Maker's name, did you get that idea from?" Varric asked in curiosity. "Well, I've noticed that people who have facial hair or their body hair, tend to be warm in cold weather. We elves don't have body or facial hair. We are fully bare!" She exclaimed.
Cullen blushed blood red as he looked away from the group; he couldn't look at her straight in the eye with images of her came into his mind.
On his cot.
Naked.
And bare.
"I think you scared the poor Templar." Iron Bull exclaimed as he laughed loudly. "I'm sure he's fine. He's a big boy." Sera joked. Rainlily bit her lower lip as she looked towards Cullen.
"What was it I said?" she asked innocently, unsure what just happened.
"Rainlily?"
She looked straight to see Mark looking at her surprised. "Markhallan!" She immediately ran towards him, jumping over Sera's legs as Mark caught her in his arms, twirling her once in a circle as he tightened his gold on her. He buried his head into her neck, smelling her scent of lavender and roses with a hint of elfroot. "I'm so glad you're alright." He whispered in her ear, feeling her arms wrap around him. "I'm glad you're okay too." She whispered back at him as she smiled in joy.
He pulled her down with him on their knees as he refused to let her go. "What's wrong?" she asked him softly. "It was a close call for the both of us…" he answered "I was afraid for a moment there, that... I'm grateful that you're safe.." She kissed his cheek as she rubbed his back. "I'm not leaving your side without a fight. I think it's the stubbornness in our blood." She told him. He laughed as he pulled back a bit, resting his hands now on her arms. "Too true, the wolf and the halla, fighting to survive." He said with a smile.
He helped her into his feet as he explained himself. "I Have spoken with Solas, he knows a place we can go that is secluded enough for us to regroup. While I inform Cullen and the others, you should stay for now with Varric, okay?" she nodded in understanding as Varric came to stand near her. "I'll watch her, Herald. You go do your thing." Varric said, as Mark smiled at him.
"Thanks, Varric."
Mark kissed her cheek, "I'll check on you soon."
Rainlily smiled as they watched him leave, before she looked to Varric. "Shall we pack up?" she asked. Varric chuckled as he crossed his arms.
"Yup, pack up."
Ooooooooooooooo
Skyhold was as grand as Solas made it out to be.
Mark Lavallen was made Inquisitor, leader of the Inquisition.
And for Rainlily, she never felt more alone. It took a week, but debris was cleaned up and within time, the companions spread like wildfire to different parts of Skyhold. When Josephine asked her what her sleeping accommodations going to be, she knew she turned out empty handed. At first, she wanted to sleep at the tavern, but it was immediately full. Then, she went to the library, but that was full too. She was now on the walls of the Skyhold castle, looking at the mountains as she realized she missed the open world. She had noticed that Cullen was in the middle tower of the Skyhold wall, so she was alert to stay clear of that tower. She went to the right corner of the castle walls when she walked into an abandoned tower, with two twin beds on each side of the room, with one full size bed on the left side corner of the room, and the right side corner with a large table and shelves along the well; draperies dangling loosely from the walls.
Abandoned, yet showed potential.
Weird, she saw a bit of herself in this room.
She sighed as she tore down the draperies first, using them as cleaning clothes as she began to clear the debris around the room. Pieces of stone and wood were scattered all over the floor and on the beds and table. It took her a few hours, but she was finally able to clean the room out from debris.
"Oh, my." Rainlily looked over her shoulder to see Josephine standing there, looking around the floor in awe. "You cleared the debris yourself?" she asked as she looked at Rainlily. Rainlily smiled and nodded as she began to pile the sheets of the full-size bed into a pile. "I sure did! This is going to be my new home!" Rainlily exclaimed happily as began to beat the pillow against the wall. Josephine coughed horrendously as the dirt and dust came from the wall, making Rainlily cough horribly as well. The ladies ran out of the tower, laughing as they waved the air with their hands. "Don't worry about a thing, we will have people to fix it up for you. Was there a particular way you wanted the room?" Josephine asked as she picked up the quill from her writing board. "Oh, no, I insist I do this Josephine. Really, it's no big deal." Rainlily insisted but the look Josephine gave her…
She knew she was not going to win the war.
Rainlily sighed with a smirk on her face. "I wanted this room to be an all in one. Bath, kitchen, and bed." she admitted. Josephine smirked and wrote her stuff down. "I will have it done by tonight, I promise you, Lady Lavallen." Josephine assured her. "Thanks Josephine. You know the Inquisition wouldn't survive without you." Rainlily praised, making Josephine blush. "You are being too kind, but I appreciate it." Josephine said as a scout came to her side. "Make sure people come into this tower and ensure Lady Lavallen's room has a bath, kitchen, and a bed-before tonight." the scout nodded and ran down the nearby stairs that led to the tavern. "Your brother was looking for you, he's in his quarters. It's in the throne room, last room on the left." Josephine told her as she began to walk away. Rainlily began to walk towards the stairs, when Josephine's voice reached her ear. "Oh, and, be patient with the Commander" she looked to the advisor "he's not always good with words." Josephine advised, winking at her as she walked towards Cullen's tower.
Rainlily sighed as she walked down the stairs, biting her lower lip as she failed to notice glares from all passersby. "Be patient?" she repeated out loud, questioning the words. What did she mean by that?
"Did you hear?"
"What?"
"Commander and the Herald's sister-"
"The Commander doesn't like her."
"But, when he carried her to his tent…"
"He doesn't like elves, fool. He's been avoiding her all this time for a reason."
"Poor girl, maybe cause she's a mage…"
She bit her lower lip again as she walked a bit faster to the throne room. She heard whispers all around her, unsure how to really feel about it.
Why were they talking about her?
Why did it hurt?
She pushed the door open and walked up the path, until she got to the last door, knocking on it gently. "Brother?" she heard two men talking and had turned to leave, not wanting to interrupt when she heard the door open. "Ah, what remarkable time you have." she turned sharply to see Dorian smirking at her, with her brother behind him smiling at her as well. "Hello sister, I've been waiting for you." Mark said in his casual manner as he pulled her in. "Josephine said you were looking for me?" she asked, unsure of what was going on. "Yes, I need to go on some missions tonight." Mark told her as he crossed his arms. She smiled at him, "Okay?" He chuckled, "And, sadly, I can't take you with me this time." she frowned as she took a step towards him. "What, but why?" she asked, clearly hurt. "We are going where Grey Warden's are. Where there's Grey Warden's, there's darkspawn. I don't want to risk losing you, so I want you to stay behind this time." Mark answered. "Who's going with you then?" she asked, trying not feel what she never wanted to feel again.
Abandonment.
"Blackwall, Varric, Solas, and Dorian. I need to go to Redcliffe first, as a favor to Dorian, but I suspect that I will be gone for a week, maybe two...or three." he answered as he put his hands on her shoulders, trying to cheer her up. "But Iron Bull and Sera will be here, I know you like them. Maybe you three can go on some quests while I'm gone, if you feel too cooped up. Skyhold feels too big...and empty." he told her. She frowned but merely nodded. She didn't listen to a thing he just said, she just wanted to do what she did best.
Run.
"I'll ask Cullen to check up on you-"
"Oh, no. That's fine." Mark and Dorian looked at her in surprise. "Did something happen between you two?" Mark asked, clearly concerned. "No. Yes...it's complicated." she confessed as she crossed her arms. "I'm sure you two can fix this, though." Dorian tried to assure her but she looked away, noticing the sadness in her eyes. "I'll leave it up to him." she said as she wiped her right eye. Before he could ask, she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. "I love you though, be safe brother." she said as she hugged him tightly. He smiled and hugged her back, "I love you too, sister." he whispered.
She let him go and ran straight out of the room, closing the door behind her. "What was that about?" Mark asked Dorian as he rubbed the back of his head in confusion.
"Lips trembling. "You stayed behind...you could've". Too afraid to look at me, "I'm right here, Cullen. Look at me." Pressing lips softly against his. He won't talk to me, he's ashamed of me. Now brother, too, is leaving. Hate feeling abandoned. Want to run, helps with the pain." Dorian and Mark turned around to see Cole sitting on the bed. "She's hurting because of that man, and now you." Cole said before disappearing. "Hurting because of that man?" Dorian repeated as a question, but Mark's eyes grew in fury. "Cullen kissed my sister…" Mark whispered as Dorian clasped a hand on his shoulder, "And classic Cullen, is avoiding her." Mark sighed as he pinched his nose, unsure how to process this. "I know what you're thinking, but this is Cullen's problem. You can't go charging to his room, displaying your brother strength, until you understand why he's distancing himself from her. Questions, first." Dorian encouraged him in a friendly manner. Mark looked at him and smiled, "I'll go see him anyways."
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Cullen looked over the reports as his scouts continuously came through his office chambers, leaving reports and picking up finished reports.
The job felt never ending.
He looked up to the small window, located behind his desk against the wall, thinking of the one person he shouldn't be.
Rainlily.
She was the baby sister of the Herald, of the Inquisitor. He missed her presence, but he didn't know how to approach her. He continuously thought of the night she slept in his tent, freezing nearly to death. The time he had waited to ensure she was safe. He thought of their simple kiss, which he regretted not reacting to but…
Did she enjoy him, as he did her?
Did she only seek friendship?
Was he seeking more than friendship?
"Lost in thought, Commander?" Cullen looked to his right and saw the Inquisitor standing there, his arms crossed. "Yes, I apologize for not noticing you come in." Cullen admitted as he turned to face him. "It's fine. I wanted to check in on you before I left." Mark said, waving his hand dismissively. "Leaving so soon?" Cullen questioned. "Yeah. I'll be taking Varric, Solas, and Blackwall. Dorian too, but he is coming straight back when he finishes looking into something in Redcliffe." Mark answered. "You're leaving your sister behind?" Cullen questioned, slightly surprised. "There are possible darkspawn when is a Grey Warden. I don't want to risk anything." Mark explained.
"I see." Cullen said softly. Mark smirked as he crossed his arms, "So, I've heard rumors about you and my sister on my way up here." Mark said bluntly, watching Cullen closely. "Rumors?" Cullen questioned. Mark suddenly drew a serious face. "What happens between you and my sister is your business, but the rumors are not nice, Cullen" Mark said as he walked to Cullen desk, placing his hands flat on the table "one of them being that you don't like my sister's...origin. You know, her pointy ears?" Cullen looked horrified at him, angry that someone had the gall to start a rumor like that here.
"That's absolute nonsense-"
"So why haven't you spoken to her since we arrived in Skyhold?" Mark questioned firmly. Cullen's eyes widened a bit at the question. Mark sighed as he leaned off the table, crossing his arms again. "You need to realize that if I heard the rumor, so did she, and trust me, she's a sensitive person" Mark said softly, looking away "I can't even imagine how she feels...and here's her big brother, not comforting her…" Cullen sighed as he looked down at the table, unsure what to say.
"Inquisitor-"
"It's your business, but if you don't enjoy my sister's company, let her know. Rumors can do a lot of damage...and so can her angry brother." Cullen nodded to the Inquisitor's warning. "Now that this is settled, is there anything you want to talk to me about? I'll be gone for a few weeks." Cullen opened the box on his desk, revealing a bottle of lyrium.
"There is something you must know…"
00000000000
Rainlily didn't know how, but she found herself outside, leaning against the castle wall next to her home, looking out at the beautiful view of the mountains. She just wanted to get away, but not be too far; knowing her brother would be enraged if she left Skyhold. She was feeling it now though, the loneliness she felt back at Haven. Her brother was leaving tonight, without her, and for a longer period this time. She had Iron Bull and Sera to keep her busy for a bit, but she knew she'd grow bored and tiresome. Maybe she could take on some quests, train to be an informant like she originally wanted to until Mark returns, or maybe…
Just go.
She looked up to see it was now night time. She could go on her own, as an agent of the Inquisition. She knew her brother would like to see her out of direct danger, and she didn't have to feel so useless. Plus…
No more seeing Cullen. It had been seven days now and she still hadn't spoken to him. She bit her lower lip as she thought of all that has transpired. She had only become acquainted with him in a short amount of time, yet felt like they've known each other for years. Maybe, she was overthinking the whole situation? Yes, she hadn't seen him, but he had not sought her out either. The other issue was that there were rumors going around of Cullen not liking her, pitying her even. She didn't believe them at first, but now she was having her doubts. She could talk to him, but she felt subconscious, he would need to take initiative this time because...maybe he really spoke to her out of being Commander to ensure she was safe…
That the Inquisitors sister was safe.
People were beginning to stare at her when she would walk throughout Skyhold. Whispers and rumors surrounding her everywhere she went...it like she was back in the village she stayed at in the Hinterlands. She could go back to that kind of life. "I don't like that look." She looked over her shoulder to see Mark standing there.
Mark saw her wearing her casual white thin long sleeve shirt with her black corset with her black tights and black boots, her white hair blowing behind her.
"What look?" she asked curiously, smiling at him sweetly. "That 'runaway' look you had a moment ago. Wipe it out of your mind this moment." he declared as he walked over to her. She laughed as she turned to face him. He leaned against the wall as he faced her. "Why didn't you tell me about the rumors?" He asked her softly, searching her eyes. She bit her lower lip as she looked away from him. "You have a lot on your plate. Besides, it's nothing I can't handle." She said, trying to sound reassuring. Mark sighed, "You want to leave though, don't you?" He asked her. She shrugged, "I'm tempted to, believe me. It's just hard sometimes...walking around Skyhold has become a depressing adventure for me. People stare, whisper more bad than good things about me. It's no different than my time in the Hinterlands, when we were reunited." She said, smiling at the memory.
"Do you want to come with me, then?" Mark asked her. She smiled at him but shook her head. "I'm a big girl, Mark. I know you want to protect me, but you won't always be there. I need to endure this." Rainlily answered, explaining it as carefully as possible.
"So, no running away?" he asked her. She bit her lower lip again, unsure if she should really answer that. "Look, instead of running away, why don't you go on some small adventures? That way, you can get away from the nonsense here in Skyhold for a while, and you would be doing something that is important." Mark asked her. He remembered how she tried to leave before back in Haven, and he wanted to be sure she would be here when he came back. She sighed, smiling at him as she nodded. "Fine, fine. I promise, I won't run away. I will talk to Josephine and Leliana in the morning to see what I can do to help." She confessed, watching Mark smile ridiculously as he patted her head. "Thank the Maker, I was afraid I'd have to ask Cassandra to watch you."
"Inquisitor, your companions are waiting for you!" Mark sighed heavily as he looked behind him, hearing Rainlily's giggle. "I better go before they send a search party." Mark told her softly before he pulled her into a warm hug. She hugged him back firmly. "Be safe, brother." She whispered. "Be safe as well, sister." he whispered back as he finally let her go. She smiled as she pushed him softly. "Now, shoo!" she said with a smile before she walked towards her tower, Mark watching her go in. Making his way down the stairs, he looked to see Cullen watching him as his companions were getting on their saddles. "Everybody ready?" Mark said with a smile as Cullen walked towards him with the horse following behind him. "Yes, Inquisitor. We haven't heard from Scout Harding, so please be prepared for anything." Cullen told him as Mark got on the horse.
"Very well, onward!"
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
SO I WANT TO APOLOGIZE, MY GRANDFATHER WAS PUT ON HOSPICE AND PASSED AWAY. I HAVEN'T BEEN IN A GOOD PLACE, AND I WAS GOING TO STOP WRITING, BUT I KNOW HE WANT ME TO CONTINUE DOING WHAT I LOVE; WHETHER I AM GOOD AT IT OR NOT. SO, THANKS FOR YOUR PATIENCE AND PLEASE LET ME KNOW HOW I AM DOING ON MY WRITING:
AM I GOING TOO FAST?
TOO LONG?
WHAT SHOULD CULLEN DO?
PLZ COMMENT ON WHAT YOU THINK AND THANKS AGAIN EVERYONE!
