Chapter 12


Food was brought to the elf that morning, but the despondent prince could not bring himself to eat. His stomach was in knots just as it had been the past few days and even the smell of the food was enough to turn his stomach. By late morning, the maids had come in to replace the sheets and comforter on the bed and took the untouched food away to be disposed. Other than their company, Legolas was left alone the remainder of that day and he spent the solitude either in bed, sitting in the chairs, or staring off into the garden on the balcony trying to find some sort of comfort and rest.

And that was about the extent of his life for the two weeks to follow. He became a recluse and kept himself tucked away in his rooms, shut off from the rest of the world. Everyone worried for the prince. His friends tried with their best efforts to find the delicate balance of leaving Legolas alone as he wished and keeping him company in order to keep a close eye on him, but nothing they did could break through the depression that consumed the elf. They could see the abasement eating at him and everything they did was not enough to reach his spirits.

The wounds on his body eventually did heal however and that was at least a small comforting fact to his friends. It took a lot of tedious care and attention to get the hurts to finally improve and the healers, Aragorn, Elladan and Elrohir, had fallen into a routine over the past fortnight to care for the injuries. Their strict diligence paid off and after what felt like forever, the cuts and abrasions sealed over and the bruises began to fade.

Though the physical wounds healed, the emotional ones did not and despite the Wood-elf's attempt to hide it, the trauma was too great and the effects of it were too noticeable. While they did everything they could for the elf, it was apparent Legolas was not doing well.

Trays of food were dropped off every morning, noon and evening, and were picked back up with nearly everything still on the plate. To his credit, Legolas did try to eat and from time to time he forced himself to pick at the food, but there were good days and there were bad days, and it seemed there were more of the later.

Legolas, Elven strong though he was, was getting weaker and weaker before their eyes. He was starving himself, and the twisted yet realistic nightmares terrorized his sleep, never letting him find true rest. Cold was a constant companion and he found himself sticking close to the fireplace, or wrapped snugly in thick cloaks, blankets or warm clothing. Every day seemed harder to get through and images of sea tugged at his heart. He wanted to sail, he needed to sail, but Aragorn's angry voice would cut through him, reminding the prince of a promise he once made to his friend. No matter how sharp the intense longing was, he fought it, determined not to break his promise. After everything that had happened, the elf did not want to cave in and admit anymore defeat, trying to hold on to some sort of pride and show his usual resilient strength. However, the longer he resisted the call of the sea, the heavier his heart felt.

Yet despite the sea longing, there was a part of him that did not want to leave either. He did not know if it was simply due to his promise, but somewhere shoved in the corners of his heart, the desire to remain in Middle Earth made itself known. This only added to the confusion in the weary elf, clouding the truth as to what he truly wanted and needed.

Those close to Legolas grew more and more concerned, and all attempts to help him made little difference and they watched with dismay as the once light-hearted and social prince became distant and closed everyone out. They wanted to help him, but how, they did not know.

Aragorn would usually wake up early and before he began his work for the day, he would visit with Legolas while tending to him, cleaning his wounds and spreading a generous application of salve over them to boost the healing process. Try as he might, he could not get the elf to open up and any slight indication that the discourse would brush upon the events that transpired, Legolas would close himself off further. Aragorn had simply given up trying to talk to him on the subject, hoping that the issues really could just vanish, but deep inside, he knew that was not the case and the king struggled to find a way to help his friend through his distress. And that tore at the Aragorn; He could only watch as the elf slid further and further into his grief and he had no way to help his friend. Aragorn felt as though he was failing Legolas.

Out of desperation, Aragorn had flat out asked Legolas if he wanted to sail. He dreaded doing it and it took him time to build up the courage to bring the question up, but the elf was quick to say no, and the man took his word for it.

While Aragorn wanted the best for his friend and would do anything to see that the elf's wishes were met, he honestly did not want the elf to leave. He knew it was selfish, but he also knew the day would come when Elladan and Elrohir would leave as they could not whiteness the death of their brother and see the devastation wreak havoc on their sister. They would choose to sail before his health declined so they would forever remember their loved ones as they always had been; happy and in perfect health.

But there was something comforting in the idea that Aragorn would not totally be abandoned in the end. Legolas would be there for him and would be by his side until his final days. Aragorn was not scared to die; he was condemned to that fate the moment he was born, but he was comforted by the idea that one of his brothers would not leave him.

What did scare him however, was thought of losing his brother early, either if Legolas sailed or faded.

The man struggled to bring his friend peace, and as the days dragged on, and the prince's health slowly became worse, he knew he could not keep the elf here if it would only cost him his life. Aragorn began to realize that the only way he could help his friend was to let him go. He dared not speak of this to anyone for he did not want to squash their hopes in the prince's recovery, but he told himself if he did not see any signs of improvement within a week, drastic measures would have to be taken. What they were yet, he did not know, but he was sure that whatever needed to happen, his brothers would back his decision.

Even so, Aragorn knew this was not his decision to make. Ultimately, Legolas had to be the one to choose what he did and that seemed to scare the man more. The man had practically grown up knowing of the elf's stubborn nature and hoped that the prince would not fight his own desires. Legolas was so willing to give up his life the night he was found and the heartbreaking words the elf spoke that night haunted the man.

Yet when Aragorn asked the elf if he desired to sail, the elf claimed he did not and for the sake of his own wishes, Aragorn believed him. The king hoped he was not living under false pretenses and the elf spoke the truth, but he could not comprehend how the elf could possibly be fading and yet have no desire to sail.

He needed to get to the true bottom of the elf's distress. He knew the violent acts against the prince was the source of it all and it devastated the light Elven heart. The horrible crimes committed against the Wood-elf were unspeakable among his kind and Aragorn feared as a mortal, he could not understand his friend's pain in the same depth that an elf might.

That terrified the man.

If he had any chance of helping Legolas, he needed to understand him, and if he simply could not understand?... The man felt lost at the idea.

The twins also took turns checking on Legolas and would make their way to his rooms after breakfast. Around noon, they would repeat the process of re-applying medications to the cuts and bruises, adding their own healing abilities to the prince's treatment. Like Aragorn, they too struggled with finding a cure for the emotional scars left on the once fair heart and felt helpless as they watched Legolas struggle internally.

They were beginning to see only two outcomes to this disaster; The price was already showing signs of fading and if they could not check the downward spiral early enough, they knew Legolas would not be long for this world. The only other option they could possible see for their friend was to get him to sail. However, with the winter months fast approaching, the next ships would not be able to leave until spring and the Noldor-elves honestly did not think the Wood-elf would last that long.

Even Arwen took some time to spend with the prince. She made it a point to keep their time light and casual and she never let on that anything was vastly out of the ordinary. To Legolas, he could see that she understood that he was hurting, both physically and mentally, but the reason for his pain seemed to be lost on her and for that, Legolas felt more at ease around the queen than he did with any of his other friends. Unlike the twins, his corruption was not so evident on him and while she did worry over him, he felt as though there was nothing to be ashamed of since knowledge of his defilement appeared to be unknown to Arwen. Of all his visitors, he actually found some enjoyment in Arwen's company and she always had some way to momentarily lift his heavy spirit.

Arwen hated to see the Wood-elf confined in his rooms and tried to put herself in his position; she knew she would go mad if she were stuck in a single room, even if it was by choice, and she was determined to make the blond elf as content in his rooms as possible. She would leave him books to keep his alone time occupied or would bring him a piece of the outside world from her garden walks. She would pick up autumn leaves that had unique shapes or colors and eagerly shared them with the prince, knowing that the Wood-elf naturally had a deeper appreciation for these tokens than any other race of elves.

On the occasion, Arwen, and sometimes even Aragorn, would bring Eldarion with them on their visits so tiny babe could visit with his extended Uncle. The child seemed to have a magic of his own and always brought joy to whomever was around him. Legolas was no exception. The elf marveled over how much the child had grown in what Elven terms seemed to be a short amount of time. Eldarion was already over a year old, but due to his mother's Elven heritage and his father's prolonged life due to his Dunedain lineage, he was not nearly as developed as a normal human would have been by now and was still very much so a newborn babe.

But though the child was still small, he had grown much by Elven standards and Legolas realized that time was a very massive changing factor to mortals. He began to reflect on the past sixty-or-so years he had known Aragorn. Being surrounded by mortals these past decades helped distort his immortal sense of time somewhat, and knew that their friendship had lasted a very long time, but the elf began to dread the near future.

Aragorn was a mortal and would one day follow the same path of his forefathers as death would claim him with the decay of time. Sure, Aragorn had about another one hundred years left to his life, maybe even more, but despite the skewed sense of time from his journeys with Aragorn along with the rangers of the north, and now living in a mortal world, Legolas still felt that fateful day was uncomfortably close as that one hundred years of Aragorn's life was still only a short passage of time to an elf.

And again, these thoughts began to plague the elf with more confusion. He knew he desired to sail and at the same time, he heard the wish within to stay. Aragorn did not have much time left in this world and Legolas wanted so bad to stay here and take advantage of every moment he had left with Aragorn.

However, he did not know if he was strong enough to see the passing of his friend either. He dreaded the man's death even though it was his destiny. And yet most of his wishes to leave had nothing to do with Aragorn, rather it dwelled on the dark memories of pain and trauma and drove the elf to desperation and depression. Legolas could not sort his feelings out and no matter what he thought he wanted, he feared of living in regret that no matter what his choice was, he would end up making a wrong one.

And that was assuming if the elf would be permitted to make that choice. Aragorn had been very clear that night in the cave, reminding Legolas that the he made a promise to the man and Aragorn expected the obligation be fulfilled. Again, this added to his sorrow and confusion as he didn't know if he was mad at the man for holding him to his word, or appreciated the fact that Aragorn had so much love and respect for him and truly could not live without his brother.

Legolas had never felt so lost in his life.

Though he was not a healer, Gimli did what he could to try and mend the elf's spirit and took it upon himself to spend time with the elf everyday in his chambers. His visits would last as long as they could and ended when he had to tend to other matters, or if the elf was showing signs of wanting to be left alone.

It was one bright day when Gimli was taking his usual time to sit with the prince when he finally decided to try and coax the elf back out into the world. Aragorn had been vigilant with making it clear that Legolas needed to take it easy and rest, but the stout being felt that the elf was out place in the closed chambers of the bleak stone room. While the prince was granted access to the balcony, he knew Legolas needed more and should be outside, spending time in a new place where he was not sitting and stewing in his emotional turmoil.

He began to formulate a plan as the two sat quietly, hardly speaking as was usual. A thought came to mind. He did not know if the elf would refuse the his idea, but it was worth a shot. Besides, he knew Legolas could be stubborn, but he was, after all, a dwarf and could put up a good case against the elf if he tried to deny his plans.

"Why don't we get out of here for a while? Ya' have been cooped up in these rooms for a long time now, I'm sure a change in scenery will do you some good."

The prince did not respond right away. He looked to the dwarf briefly to see what brought about this sudden plan, but the dwarf had an even calm about him. Legolas sat back in the chair and muddled over the idea. A small part of him wanted to get out the rooms, but any time he dared to even think about it lately, a gnawing fear kept him reserved in his wishes and the only place he felt safe was in his rooms.

"I do not know Gimli..."

"Oh come on, I'm sure you are sick of these rooms by now... I am, and I at least get a break from them! I think ya' need to be outside, and you need more than that little balcony." He nodded his head toward the glass double doors as a reference.

"Then where do you suggest we go?"

"Is there any place you would like to be? Is there another garden or a place where there are trees to talk to? Perhaps we can go to the library, or even the Hall of Fire."

The prince looked off and didn't say anything. The palace was littered with courtyards to try and add a softness to the stone kingdom, but every garden was the same; a small court that was lulled to sleep by the coming of winter and all of them were completely surrounded by stone walls as various rooms and halls had balconies to overlook the garden. While he had not been in one of these gardens since his return, the very thought of them reminded him of a cell; being trapped and people could watch your every move.

"Lad?" The dwarf asked as the prince seemed to drift off.

"Everything is the same around here... one garden looks like the next."

"Do you want to get out of the palace and head to the city? We could find-"

"No." the elf said the single word with a low sternness and halted the rest of the dwarf's thoughts on the idea immediately.

"Alright... it was just a thought. Let me think here...You know, those two brothers of Aragorn's are quite mischievous and they challenged me to a game of target shooting the other day. They claimed that I... *Gimli Son-of-Gloin*, could not outdo *them*. I have to admit, while they do not give up easily, they could not out best me and I quickly put them out of commission with my ax! And so it stands, I am still undefeated by an elf!" The dwarf had a smug grin on his face and let out a small chuckle.

He looked to Legolas and saw a brief moment of amusement stretch across the once lost features of the elf. A small threaded smile tugged at the corners of his lips and the elf let out a small snicker as a mental picture came to mind. The dwarf saw this drastic change in his companion's attitude and pressed on hoping to instill more of this good mood.

"But I would like to continue the contest with a worthy opponent. What do you say Laddie? Will you give me a true contest and let me put my skills to a real test?"

Again the elf did not say anything right away and seem to contemplate the idea. Gimli added a barb to his question, knowing his statement would provoke the elf and Legolas could not refuse the game, even if he had absolutely no interest in partaking.

"Do not tell me you are scared..."

The elf shot him a defiant look, it was more out of habit than anything and he wasn't even aware of his actions as the dwarf's words hit him in just the right way. Everyone seemed to tiptoe around him and this was the first time something felt normal, even if it was a challenge from the dwarf. Words flew out of his mouth part in curt reply and all in good fun.

"Scared? You mean the way you were when we made our way to the Paths of the Dead and you refused to enter?" The elf kept his face impassive, but quirked an eyebrow at the dwarf who seemed to be taken aback by the comment.

"I was not scared to enter it! I followed didn't I?"

"Yes... *you* had to follow after I made my way through and proved it was safe for little dwarves to enter." Legolas' voice was calm and cool as he further teased the dwarf.

Gimli clenched his jaw at the remark but he did it more for show than out of anger. He was glad to see a familiar spark in the prince, even if it was at his own humiliating expense.

"Those are fightin' words Lad! Do not be speaking them unless you are willing to step up to the challenge."

"I have stepped up and I accept your challenge. Do you need help stepping up to it yourself? My offer still stands, 'would like for me to find you a box?'"

Gimli's jaw dropped. "Lad, you are going to be in a world of hurt... I am going to get our weapons and I'll find a place to settle this once and for all. You had better be ready when I get back because I'm not going easy on you."

With that, the dwarf got to his feet and made his way to the door. He stopped in the threshold and turned back to the elf who was watching him and Gimli pointed a thick finger at the elf.

"You are going to pay for those words Lad..." and he walked out and pulled the door closed behind him.

As the door clicked shut, a large smile split across the dwarf's face. His plan had worked and he was relieved to see this change in his friend. He headed off to prepare for their contest.