Goodbye and Hello

These good fellows don't belong to me but I promise when I'm done to pick um up, dust um off and with a kiss on the cheek return them safely home.

"Love is like a puzzle. When you're in love, all the pieces fit but when your heart gets broken, it takes a while to get everything back together."

I know this is a short one but wanted to give you food for thought ; )


Chapter 12

Johnny felt heartbroken over Roy's admission because those four words spoke worlds to Johnny. His friend needed his help and support.

"You can stay at my place if you want to for a while," he offered not really sure what Roy was wanting to do.

Roy looked down, "That would help, thanks. Do you mind, you know just till I can figure out what to do?"

Johnny smiled, "Course I don't mind. I even replaced the old chair."

Roy chuckled, "Thank goodness." With the decision being made they headed home.


Roy settled down on the couch while Johnny went to the kitchen to fix them some lunch. The air was full of tension since Johnny really didn't know what to say. He was afraid that if he talked about it before Roy was ready then it would be too stressful for him. Instead he chose to do what he had been doing, remain quiet until Roy was ready to talk about it himself. He brought Roy out a tray with some soup and a sandwich.

"I don't expect you to wait on me Junior. Brackett wants me up and about," he said as he started to eat.

"I heard what Brackett said and he told you to take it easy for the first few days out of the hospital then to increase your activity," Johnny said with a mouth full of sandwich.

"I never really thanked you for what you did, getting me out of that building that night."

"Hey, like you told me one time, that's what partners do," he said with his crooked grin.

Roy just nodded and smiled. Nothing really said it as well as that. He would have done the same for him, in fact he had in the past.

The rest of the meal was eaten in silence as they watched TV. Johnny picked up the dishes and took them to the kitchen. When he came back out to the living room he saw Roy standing next to the bookcase holding a picture frame.

When Johnny approached Roy just stood still, holding it and absently rubbing his finger over it. It was a picture of Johnny with Jenny and Chris at his birthday party the year before.

"Roy?"

"You know they planned everything for that party. Wouldn't let me or Jo do anything."

Johnny laughed, "Yea, I kinda figured that out with the princess balloons and Batman plates."

Roy laughed too, "I forgot about those."

"Well I'm pretty sure I burned all the pictures of me in the tiara," Johnny said. "There was no way I was going to let Chet get his hands on one of those.

Roy got quiet. "What if I don't get to see them again."

Johnny stepped in front of him, "Just because she walked out on you doesn't' mean you lose Jenny and Chris, Roy. She can't do that to you."

But Roy wasn't listening to logic, "She took them and left. I feel like she took a part of me and left with it."

"We'll get them back."

Roy looked at this man he called his brother and saw determination but he felt so lost, "How Johnny? She's made no contact since she left."

Even the thought of it infuriated Johnny. Not only did she just walk out when Roy might not live through the night, she never made any further contact. Never even called to see if he had lived or died in those first days. No one really knew where she went either. They had family scattered throughout the country, she could be with any of them.

"First we find them, then we get you to them."

Roy was exhausted and a part of him just wanted to give up on it all. It seemed hopeless to him right now. "I'm really tired."

"Of course. I've got some errands to run. You take the couch and rest while I'm gone." Johnny grabbed him a pillow and blanket while Roy seemed to just melt into the cushions and was asleep within minutes. Johnny put the blanket over him and headed out. There was someone he needed to talk to right away.


Johnny took his key and opened the door. Taking a deep breath he entered the house of his friend. It looked like nothing had been touched, like they had just been there moments before. Toys scattered on the floor, Chris's school books, and Jenny's crayons. Pictures of the happy family on the mantle just made him mad. He reached up and took three that were only of Jenn and Chris. From the living room he went into the little office and looked through the drawers trying to find Roy's address book. He found it in the second drawer knowing it would have the possible places that Joanne would have gone to stay. From there he headed into their bedroom. This room made him uncomfortable. Even though no one was home he felt like he was somehow invading. He reached into the closet and took out a suitcase then proceeded to fill it to the brim with clothes for Roy, his shaving kit, and anything he thought he might need over the next few days.

With some essentials in his arms he took one last look to what he had always considered his second home, feeling like it would never be the same for any of them again. Next to the person he needed to see.


Emily opened the door, "Johnny! Come in, come in. Is Hank expecting you?"

"No and I'm sorry to come unannounced but I need to talk to him about Roy," Johnny said.

"Sure hon, he's in his office. You know the way. I'll get you two something to drink."

He smiled, "Thanks Emily." Johnny took the hallway to the first room on the left and knocked on the door.

"Come in Emily," Hank said.

"Cap? It's me Johnny," he said as he stuck his head in the door.

Hank stood up. He knew that Johnny was bringing Roy home today, what was he doing here? "John, what's wrong? Is Roy okay?"

"Yea Cap, I picked him up from the hospital today and took him home. Well, home to my place."

Hank was surprised, "You're place?" He motioned for him to sit down.

"He didn't want to go home." He shook his head, "I don't think he could handle being there with them all gone."

It made sense to Hank and he shouldn't have been surprised. He knew that Roy had not talked about her yet from what Johnny had told him. "How's he doing with it all?"

Johnny seemed despondent, "He didn't even talk about it until today. He stared talking about Jenny and Chris. He thinks he will never see them again."

"I don't think she plans on keeping them from him John but I don't know how to find her so that we can tell her he wants to see them."

Johnny pulled out the address book. "I got this from his house. We need to find them Cap. He needs desperately to see the kids. He seems like he's giving up."

That was Hanks fear. Roy was holding all those feelings inside. There was no way that someone could go through all that and not be torn apart inside. "Let's start with finding her and go from there. Have they told him how long till he can return to work?" Hank chose to not consider the fear that the trauma was too severe and Roy wouldn't return to the department.

Johnny just shrugged, "Doc told him he would see him again in 2 months and re-evaluate him. Only then would he discuss him coming back to the station."

Hank could see the worry in the young man. Of course none of them could imagine the A-shift family without Roy being part of it anymore. He would do whatever he could to find her. Now what he did when he found her was still up for debate at this point.


Hank worked on calling all the numbers in the book while Johnny worked his shifts. In between he was home with Roy having fairly quiet days but the nights were frequently not quiet as Roy continued to have nightmares. Johnny would hear him fighting unknown demons from the living room and rush out of his room to check on him. Most of the time he would settle down on his own but there were times that Johnny would wake him then after a glass of milk they would go back to sleep.

The days went by quickly as Johnny helped him continue his rehab which now included running. They would both go running every morning before breakfast or before Johnny had to go in to work. Physically Roy was getting stronger every day under the care of his best friend, his family. Weekly they hosted a card game with the rest of the crew and laughed just like old times with their friends. But when they were alone in the apartment Johnny could see that Roy's heart was not healing.


Johnny was cleaning the kitchen on evening when the phone rang. He reached over and answered it.

"Hey Cap."

"Where?"

"Okay, thanks."

He looked up to see Roy standing in the doorway, "Who was that?" His expression was flat, his voice unemotional.

"It was Cap. He called to tell us that …" Johnny was almost afraid to tell him.

Roy instantly picked up on the apprehension in Johnny's voice and expression, "Johnny?"

"He found Joanne."