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All Clear - Chapter 12
Thursday the following week - Queens Medical Center - neuroscience wing - 0830 hours
"Five days, Catherine," Danny said in frustration as they again were told to wait outside Steve's room while the nurses tended to his needs. That, and during his physical therapy were the only times one of them wasn't with him.
Every few hours they had to leave the hospital room, or during the first four days the ICU cubicle, while the nurses tended to Steve's basic needs. Like emptying the urine collection bag, checking him for sore spots and tending to other basics Danny didn't even want to think about.
Only when one suddenly wasn't able to perform such basic things, it became clear how we take it for granted to use the bathroom on our own, or to take a shower, or brush our teeth. But Steve couldn't do any of that at the moment; he was completely dependent on others for all hygienic basics.
"Danny, he is improving," Catherine tried to assure her friend. "They removed the catheter last night and said his intracranial pressure hadn't fluctuated at all after they had stopped the bleeding almost a week ago."
"Yeah, but he's still not 'in there', Catherine. Why isn't he awake?" Danny thought back to what the doctor had said after they had removed the device that had been measuring the pressure on Steve's brain. "After the MRI, the doc said there was no direct injury to the brain. If it isn't injured, why isn't he waking up?"
"I don't know," Cath whispered. "Nelson said even without a direct injury, it still suffered huge trauma. Danny, I don't know, maybe his brain simply shut down to protect Steve. Hell, I don't know," Catherine said with a raising voice.
"Hey, calm down," Danny said, smiling and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze of assurance. "It was a rhetorical question, you know!"
"I know, Danny. I'm sorry."
"Hey, nothing to be sorry about. We're all on edge. I mean, he's been sleeping the days away, and would probably have a field day with us worrying like this."
Catherine had to smile at that. "He wouldn't want us to hang around the hospital like this."
"Yeah, he's one to talk," Danny grumbled. "As if he wouldn't sit next to your bed 24/7."
Catherine smiled at that; it was probably true. He would only leave after they kicked him out. If even then.
"You can go back in now," Lisa Raven, Rave as she liked to be called, told them as she came out of Steve's room.
"Thanks, Rave," Catherine told the nurse she had taken an instant liking to when they were introduced yesterday. She was Steve's primary care nurse. This wing only housed patients with more or less serious TBIs, and each of them was assigned a nurse.
Of course Rave also tended to other patients, none of the injured had the luxury of a nurse of his or her own, but Nurse Raven was the go-to-guy for Steve's friends and relatives. Cath thought it was a very good pilot project; there was always a person who had all the information. It felt good to have someone to talk to and get informative answers.
"Oh, before I forget, Steve's therapist called and asked for one of you to be present when he comes for the next session," Lisa Raven told Danny and Catherine. "He'll be here in the next two hours."
"Thanks, we'll be here," Danny said and wondered what he had to tell them.
Catherine and Danny entered the room a second time this morning, and took their places next to Steve's bed. Cath again on his left, so she could hold his hand, while Danny sat on Steve's right with the casted arm.
"Hey, Buddy, you're looking good," Danny told his friend. And he really meant it.
Steve looked relaxed, the bruises on his face were discolored but barely swollen anymore. The abrasion on his cheek not as pronounced anymore. He was clean shaven and even his natural color had come back. The only thing out of place was the thin tube going into his nose, feeding him with the nutrition he needed.
"You know, it was actually Chin's turn to sit and entertain you, but he had an errand to run this morning. So, you will have to put up with us for now," Danny told him about why Chin was not here. Not that Steve would complain about it either way, but they tried to keep up a normal conversation. It was more like a monologue, but they tried their best. "Well, I will also leave in a little while, but Cath will stay with you until later this afternoon."
"Yeah, and I finally found that book you were in the middle of reading, so we will be occupied for a while," Catherine told Steve.
They both watched the man on the bed closely whenever they talked to him, but so far there simply hadn't been a reaction. Not even when his eyes were open, which they were more often than not.
"Hey, Steve, I need to ask you something," Danny called out to his friend. "You know, Gracie is bugging me to come visit you. I'm running out of arguments why she can't come. You know my daughter, she's relentless. So, I want to know if it would be okay for you if she came by. Maybe next week or so?"
Danny and Cath had discussed this matter, and came to the conclusion that they couldn't keep Grace from her uncle for long. They surely didn't want to scare Grace, but she was a clever girl and knew that Steve had been hurt badly. And no matter how much they all denied the fact, there was the possibility that this was how Steve would be for the foreseeable future. They simply couldn't deny Grace's wish to see her beloved uncle. No matter how hard it would be.
"Is Grace prepared for it now?" Catherine asked.
"Her therapist talked to her about brain injuries and what to expect," Danny told her about Grace's therapist she had been seeing since she had been kidnapped. "You know, Grace handled Steve without his memory better than we all did. She just took him as he was after he lost his memory. She told me one day, he was still her uncle Steve, it didn't matter if he remembered her, she remembered him and loved him still the same."
"Your daughter is pretty amazing," Cath whispered.
"Yeah," Danny agreed.
They both fell silent for a few minutes and watched their friend sleep. Both fully knowing that he was not just sleeping, even though the doctors had assured them he wasn't in a coma either. There had been a lot of brain activity in the last couple of days, way more than before. That gave them hope, but it still didn't make Steve react to any stimuli verbally or in a way that showed them he was aware of their presence.
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"Keep going!" Steve shouted at his four team mates. "Move it!"
Steve was getting a little frustrated; he really should have known better. Teaming up with them was a sure way to lose the race. They would never make it. Not with these four lame ducks on his team.
"God damn it, Steve, will you slow down!" Danny called out and stopped his ascent after his partner.
"If we slow down even more, we will never even be in the first ten groups," Steve said, but did stop for a moment. "Don't you guys have any shred of ambition to win this thing?" Steve asked his team. "Come on, it's for a good cause," he tried to motivate them.
Every one of his team that consisted of Grace, Cath, Danny and Chin only shook their heads at him. "Obviously not as much as you," Catherine panted out.
The only one not out of breath, beside Steve, was Gracie. All her cheerleading training was now paying off.
"I think Gracie and I should lead, and leave you lame ducks to take a rest," Steve grinned at them and turned to Grace. "Grace, you wanna win this?"
"Yeah!" She told him with excitement in her voice and moved to catch up with her uncle.
"See, that's the spirit!" Steve called out and high-fived the young girl.
"OH NO! No way are you taking my daughter out of my sight," Danny said and stood up from the rock he was sitting on. "Gracie, come back here, you're not going with that whack job on your own. No way."
"Are you serious, Danny?" Steve asked in a slightly angry voice when Danny pulled his daughter away from him.
"Am I serious? Deadly serious. Last time you were alone with Grace you lost her in the mall," Danny reminded him of their last little adventure.
"But Danno, that was not Uncle Steve's fault. I went out the restroom the wrong way and had to walk all the way around to get back to Uncle Steve," Grace told her father with a pout on her face.
"Doesn't matter, I don't trust your uncle to watch out for you."
Deadly silence settled over the scene. Steve looked with huge eyes at his partner and then shook his head, as if to clear his thoughts. He gently touched his left ear where he had been hit by a branch earlier. The little cut had soaked the band aid they had put on it.
"I see," was all Steve said. "We should keep moving if we ever want to reach the finish line." Steve turned without another word and took off with his team slowly trotting after him.
Steve thought back at when Grace had asked him to participate in the challenge race for her school. All entry money and what they sold at the stands at the finish line would go to a good cause. They had needed to build a team, and it had been easy to get Cath and Chin on board; back then he had been sure they were a good fit. Now he knew better.
Only Gracie was really in the boat with him, cheering as loud as he was when they slid down the long natural water slide, crawled through the mud and climbed over the rocks and up and down the trees.
The others were only shaking their heads at him and Grace having such fun getting wet, muddy and in Steve's case, a bit bloody. It felt like he and Grace were a real team, but the others didn't want anything to do with him.
And now Danny made it clear that he couldn't even have Gracie on his team. Steve marched on, lost in his thoughts, and came to the conclusion that he was on his own even among his team, his so called ohana.
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Steve's hospital room - 0950 hours
Cath took the book out of her bag and began reading: "Well, first of all, you're dealing with a mass murderer," I tell them, then explain how that's different from serial murderer and spree killers. A serial killer is hunting human beings for the... Cath paused and looked at the man in the bed.
"Really, Steve, this is what you read in your free time? The Anatomy of Motive by John Douglas?" Catherine read the title of the book and shook her head. "Well, guess you are not the Shades-of-Gray-book-guy", Cath mumbled and slightly blushed thinking of what she had tested with Steve straight from another book she had read.
Before she could start reading again the door opened and Steve's physical therapist entered. Peter Stone was a Canadian who married a Hawaiian girl and now lived in paradise full time. Cath had learned all about him the first time they had met; Peter really was a talker.
"Hey, Catherine, how is Steve today?" He greeted her and took a look at his patient. "Still lazy, huh? Well, we will change that," he told her with a smile.
"Hi, Peter. Nurse Raven said you wanted to talk to me or Danny?"
"Yeah, I would like to show you some exercises you can do with Steve," Peter said as he pulled down the sheet to Steve's waist. "Come here, please, we can start with his arms. The more PT he gets the better. Don't worry, these are easy exercises and they won't hurt him."
"Why does he still have the soft neck brace on?" Cath asked about the brace that was on and off at what she thought random intervals.
"Steve has trouble keeping his neck straight, his head rolls to the side too often. He needs a little help to prevent his neck muscles from getting strained. But he needs to be without it more often than with it so we're doing three hours off; one hour on."
Over the next fifteen minutes, Peter showed her how to stretch the muscles in Steve's arms. He showed her how to rotate the shoulder and the wrists. Of course that only worked on one, they had to be careful with the exercises on the right arm.
"There is resistance," Catherine suddenly called out and almost dropped the left arm.
Peter smiled at her reaction. "I know; he's been flexing his muscles a few times when we do this. I don't think it's a reflex, I think he's doing it on purpose."
Catherine looked down at Steve, but he was just as relaxed as always. There was no indication that he was aware of what was going on.
"Now, let's move to the legs," Peter said and exposed both of Steve's legs. He bunched up the sheet across Steve's lap and took hold of his right leg. "We still need to be a bit careful with his knee, it's still a bit unstable. I have asked the orthopedist to take another look at it."
"You think it's more injured than they first thought?"
"Not sure, I just want to be sure before we cause any damage," Peter explained.
Peter continued to show Cath a few simple exercises she could do with Steve, before he went on to do the more difficult stuff. "Please don't do these with him, he could be injured if they are done incorrectly. But it will help him if you do the stuff I showed you."
"Yeah, okay." Cath was glad to have something she could do for her friend. She had the sneaking suspicion this was as much for her benefit as it was for Steve's. But she didn't really care, she was happy to do anything that might help Steve in any way.
If it was reading to him a book that she found rather disturbing, or if it was doing more or less useless exercises. She would happily spend her hours investing in him, always in the hope that he would wake up from any of it.
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Queen Medical Center - Private Room - Neuroscience Wing
10 days after the emergency surgery
The days went by and Cath, Danny and Chin had found a routine that worked for all of them. Chin would come in the morning at ten and sit with Steve until three in the afternoon, then it was Danny's shift until eight in the evening. Cath had spent every night and morning with Steve.
All three of them read to him, talked to him, did the exercises they were shown to do with him. When they were with him they interacted with Steve in every way possible. Steve was in a private room, but a second bed had been squeezed in there for Catherine who had rarely used it. She always crawled into Steve's bed to catch a few hours of sleep with him. The first night she had done it after he had been declared stable, the night nurse had frowned at her, but hadn't thrown her out.
"Hey, Chin, how is he today?" Danny greeted his friend as he entered Steve's room.
"He's... good I think," Chin said and greeted his work partner. "He was really good at PT, it felt like he tried to fight us. A lot more than usual."
"Fight you?" Danny wanted to know and went to greet his friend. "Hey, Buddy," Danny said and laid his hand on his partner's shoulder. "I'll be right with you, I just need to talk to Chin for a minute."
"What's up, brah?"
"I was with the DA all morning. We went through my statement about the warehouse," Danny told Chin about his morning. "Can you believe it, he asked when he can talk to Steve about his statement."
"Wasn't he informed about what happened?"
"Yeah, he was. He said he didn't realize it was this serious," Danny said and shook his head in disgust.
"They have more than enough evidence without Steve's testimony. Besides he wouldn't tell them anything other than what you told them," Chin assured Danny.
"Probably," Danny grumbled. "Kono called just before I came here," Danny told about the call he had received at the office.
"Did you tell her?" Chin wanted to know.
"No. Like we discussed I didn't want to put her into the position to have to decide between coming here because of Steve and staying and finding Adam," Danny explained.
"Yeah, but at some point we have to tell her. She will be really angry with us," Chin answered. "It was hard enough to talk her out of coming here after Steve was injured two months ago. I doubt she would stay away now. You know that, Danny."
"Yeah, but I don't think Steve would want her here."
"What do you mean by that, Danny?"
"Only that Steve wouldn't want Kono to give up on Adam to be here while he's not even awake," Danny explained further. "He didn't want her to come eight weeks ago because he had no recollection of her at all, and he sure wouldn't want her to come now."
"That's harsh, brah."
"No, think about it... it's the truth. And I really think it wouldn't be fair to Kono... or Adam if she comes here. I mean, really, Chin, what can she do?"
Chin contemplated that for a moment before he spoke, "I guess you're right. But somehow it feels wrong that she's not here."
"I know it does," Danny agreed. "Listen, I have left some paperwork on your desk, can you look through it and see that it gets to Denning?"
"Sure. Call me if you need anything, Danny. Take care of Steve. I'll call if a case comes up," Chin said and left Danny alone with his unconscious friend.
So far it was almost like the bad guys had taken a vacation as soon as Steve had been admitted to the hospital. Other than the 'Warehouse bust' and the arrest of the 'Art thieves' there hadn't been any cases they had to work on.
They were now completely up to date with all their paperwork. Danny had even finished the new filing system Steve had begun on a day he was suffering from sheer boredom.
"So, it's just you and me, Babe," Danny said as he settled down in 'his' chair next to his friend's bed. "What do you wanna do today? Hey, have I told you about Grace's boat excursion? She couldn't stop talking about it. But you know what, I think that is something she should tell you herself. Remember I told you she really wants to see you?" Danny paused for a moment and looked closely at his friend who had a frown on his face.
"Steve? Hey, can you hear me?" Danny grabbed Steve's hand and squeezed it. "If you can hear me, Steve, squeeze my hand."
The frown on Steve's face turned into a soft smile, but he didn't squeeze Danny's hand or show any sign that he had even heard his friend. Even the doctors were not able to tell them what was really going on in Steve's head. They did know from all their tests that there was a lot of activity, but they had no idea why he wouldn't wake up. Or what kind of damage they would be facing when Steve finally decided to wake up.
"Okay, where was I? Right, Gracie. Listen, Steve, I can't keep Grace away any longer. She will come see you tomorrow. And you better prepare yourself, she will tell you in detail what they did on their boat trip," Danny told Steve and had to smile thinking about how excited Grace was to finally see her Uncle Steve again.
Danny, of course was a bit worried if it really was a good idea to let her come. But they couldn't shield her from this forever. Steve was hurt, and he might stay this way, so they had to deal with it at some point.
After now ten days later it was simply time to face the harsh reality. Steve might not wake up.
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When did the voice change again? Where did the soft voice go to? The one that smelled so good and spoke so softly to him. And touched him, and best of all kissed him so gently. He loved that the most. The kisses, gentle touches and the smell. He felt safe with her nearby. With her there it wasn't so dark.
The dark was really getting to him. But when she was close he didn't feel so lost and alone, and the dark was not as bad as without her. Even though the other voices also talked to him, or maybe not to him, he wasn't sure because he didn't understand a single word, it was only the soft voice that took the fear and disorientation away.
Steve tried to concentrate and follow the sound of the voice. This was the one that talked really fast and loud at times. Steve was sure that voice was angry for some reason. He didn't think the voice was angry at him, just angry in general. He was curious at what kind of person was behind that voice, because it changed so often from loud and angry to soft and caring. But that was far and between.
But none the less he tried to grab on to it, to let it guide him out of the darkness, but it never worked. He felt so helpless and alone, he longed for the gentle voice to come back. Maybe this time he could reach the voice, or at least get closer to it. But it was always so far away, no matter how hard he tried, he simply couldn't catch up.
But he would not give up.
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It was a few minutes to seven when Catherine came to take over from Danny after he had sat with Steve for the last several hours.
"Catherine, hi, you're early. We're not done with the exercises yet," Danny greeted Cath and kept carefully moving Steve's right leg as he had learned.
"Yeah, I finished earlier than I thought," Cath answered and bent to kiss Steve as her greeting. "Hey, Sailor, how're you doing?" She whispered near his ear.
Of course there was no reaction, but Cath would swear Steve smiled whenever she touched him. She didn't care what others said, she was sure he could sense their presence.
"What have you been up to today?" Danny asked and made sure Steve lay comfortably again when he was done with the leg movements.
"I did some research, and talked to a few people," Catherine told him.
"About what?"
"Danny we need to start thinking about transferring Steve to a facility that is better equipped to help him," Catherine softly said and didn't take her eyes off Steve.
"Facility? What the hell are you talking about?" Danny asked with a slightly raised voice.
"I was thinking about Tripler for the short term, but later..."
"What the fuck, Catherine," Danny exploded. "How could you even say something like that, how could you even think it?" Danny was outraged.
"Don't you dare turn my words all around and interpret something I never said," Catherine yelled back. "I never, not even once thought that Steve won't be waking up. Don't you dare say that!"
The nice voice was back... but it was different. Loud and upset. He didn't like her to be upset. She wasn't mad at him... she was arguing with the loud voice.
Why?
Their loud words were like bolts of lightning stabbing through the darkness and causing the pain to crescendo in his head.
He didn't like this. But he had no idea how to stop them.
"Then what is this about?" Danny asked in only a slightly lower voice.
"I just want Steve to have the best care possible, Danny," Catherine softly answered. "You have any idea how hard it is to see my best friend, the man I love like this?"
"Yeah, I do."
"I know," Cath said and could see the pain in Danny's eyes, the same she saw whenever she looked into the mirror. "Danny, they have done a good job here, but they are not equipped to give Steve any more than they do," Catherine tried to explain her plan. "Tripler sees cases like Steve's every day. They can handle his special needs a lot better."
"Special needs? He is not a special needs case!" Danny's voice again raised to almost yelling.
"Danny, stop it! Stop making me the bad guy here, I only want what's best for Steve. I love him, and I want to help him!" Cath was also yelling now. She was sure someone would come soon to see what all the ruckus was about.
"Oh, yeah? In shipping him off to some facility?"
"You have NO idea what you're saying, Danny!"
"Ughhh."
They both whipped their heads around when they heard the noise coming from the bed.
"Steve?" Cath instantly hovered over her friend, and saw that his eyes fluttered open.
Something they had done countless times before. But never before had there been any recognition when he finally had managed to open his eyes. They always roamed around without focusing on anything. This time was different.
Danny and Cath looked at their friend in amazement as Steve blinked and tried to focus.
"Steve, can you hear me?" Catherine took his left hand and held it. "Squeeze my hand if you can understand me."
Instead of feeling her hand being squeezed, Catherine heard what they all had been waiting for the last ten days, "Cath?"
A verbal coherent response from their fallen leader.
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