Chapter Twelve
"I don't understand," Toby repeated. He looked at Josh crumpled on the sofa and Sam standing before him fists curled and head down. "Sam!" His forceful tone made Sam look up at him.
"You wanted to know, you all wanted to know, well now you do."
Toby shook his head. "So what are you telling me? You're saying those thugs beat you up because of what Josh did?"
Sam didn't turn around. "Ask, Josh. He seems to know as much as me."
"Well?" Toby shouted the word at Josh and like Sam the tone made him finally lift his head up.
"I wanted Sam to say that it wasn't true. I'd convinced myself it wasn't true but…" Josh stood and started to pace restlessly. "This guy, I don't know who he was, he stopped me and asked if Sam was talking to me." Again his hand returned to his hair and brushed nervously through it. "I didn't know what he…I mean what sort of question is that?"
"It's the sort of question you don't answer!" Toby shouted back and the anger in his voice made Sam turn around.
"It's alright, Toby. I was stupid to try and hide it, stupid to think you wouldn't find out."
"Alright, this is far from alright." Toby pulled out a dining chair and sat heavily on it. He took a deep breath and then looked back at Josh. "So what else did he say, this guy?"
"He just said that Sam was beaten because of me. Gillmore has friends and so do I. I hurt one their friends..." Josh trailed off, the rest of the explanation not needed.
Toby turned his attention back to Sam. "Sit down." Sam waved a hand to indicate he was fine. "Sit down, Sam! A few minutes ago you were-" He stopped, not wanting Josh to know what had happened before he had arrived. "Please, just sit down."
Whether to appease Toby or because he realised he needed to, Sam pulled a chair from the opposite end of the table and sat. He folded his hands in his lap because they were shaking and he looked down at them. He couldn't look at Josh or Toby.
"I think you should go home," Toby told Josh but it was clear Josh had no intention of going anywhere.
"I came here to talk to Sam. This is your house but it's my problem to fix. Can you give us a few minutes?"
Josh's words were answered by the sound of chair legs scraping against the wooden floor. "Your problem! You think this only concerns you? This is all about Josh and how bad he feels?" Sam felt a hand on his arm and shrugged it off. "Why do you think I didn't tell you, Josh? Why do you think I lied and pretended I couldn't remember and dodged any question that led to the truth?" Sam walked closer to Josh who stood. "You can't fix this. You can't change it. Nothing is better now that you know, it just means that you feel like shit too and I've got to feel bad about that as well as everything else."
Josh held out his hand but Sam backed away. "Sam, listen to me. I can get whoever did this. I can find out who was responsible and then at least someone will pay for it."
"The FBI has who did this and they're no further to knowing anything. I don't want a investigation that involves all of DC knowing every little detail. I was mugged, that's what everyone thinks so let's leave it at that. They'll be rumours and I guess a few people know the truth but let's just leave it as it is."
Toby wasn't sure if he agreed with Sam or not and he knew the words were being spoken emotionally and minds might change in the cold light of day. He also knew that if Josh didn't leave soon things would be said that would be regretted and most likely by him. "Okay, let's just take some time to think about this. Josh, you've had a shock and I don't think talking about it is going to get us anywhere right now."
"So I just forget it, is that what you're saying?"
"I'm saying you're upset and Sam's upset so it's probably not the most-"
"You think I'm going to just pretend I don't know the truth? You can keep it a secret, Sam, but I won't. You're happy with people thinking you were mugged in an alleyway, fine, but I'm not happy with people thinking we knew the truth and didn't do anything about it. What's next, Sam, you going to give your milk money to every pissed off Republican you meet?"
Toby was a helpless bystander as Sam flew at Josh. Sam had him against the wall with his shirt balled in his hand before Toby managed to get moving. Sam's grip tightened. His cast wrist served to add extra weight to Josh's chest as he pushed him more firmly against the wall. The two men stared at each other intensely and so Toby backed off and waited.
"You fucking idiot! You don't get it. It's that sort of crap that got me beat up in the first place."
Josh lifted his hands and placed them over Sam's. He pushed him away and easily held his weakened friend away from him. Sam's breathing was already becoming laboured and Josh could feel his hands shaking within his. He knew he should back off but the horror he felt at being the cause of the attack was surfacing as anger and there was nothing he could do to stop it. "No! You got beat up because you're known for being Josh Lyman's friend more than you are for being a fucking politician!"
Toby moved quickly but he was too slow to stop Sam's hand from rising up and slamming into Josh. Josh stumbled against the wall and down. The edge of Sam's cast had caught him on the nose and blood gushed freely down his face and shirt. Sam also stumbled backwards, his cast wrist immediately brought into his stomach and covered by his other arm.
For a few moments there was silence followed by a mumbled curse. Toby helped Josh up and placed a towel into his hands. He pointed the way to the bathroom but Josh shook his head, picked up his coat and made his way to the door. He held the door open. "Phone me when you get home." Josh nodded and walked out without looking back.
Toby's main concern was still sitting on the floor, his face pale and his wrist still held protectively. Toby squatted down beside him and was surprised when Sam leant against him. "Let me see." Toby tried to move Sam's arm away from his wrist but he held on tightly and shook his head. He was sweating and seemed even paler than before. "If it's broken we need to go back to the ER." Sam still wouldn't let Toby touch his wrist and when Toby saw the moisture in Sam's eyes he backed off. "Okay, let me phone and see what they say, okay?" Toby knew exactly what they would say. Bring Sam straight to the ER.
The thought of going back to hospital for a third time made Sam lift his head and straighten slightly. "It's not broken," Sam said in a shaky voice. Toby had the phone in his hand and looked down at Sam doubtfully. "It's not," Sam repeated and looked up at Toby, almost pleading with him to put down the phone. Toby continued to stare down at Sam before reluctantly placing the phone back on the table.
"Okay, but if I think you need to go then you'll go."
Sam nodded his acquiescence and reached out his good hand for Toby to help him to his feet. He let Toby guide him to the sofa and happily took the two painkillers that were offered to him along with a glass of water. He placed the empty glass down and settled back against the cushions. "Man, that hurt."
"Well, you should have read the care leaflet. Don't get your cast wet, don't attempt to ease itching by poking objects inside of it, don't wear nail polish so you can observe the colour of your fingertips, oh, yeah, and don't smack someone so hard that you floor them with your cast!"
Sam held up his hand to indicate he'd got the message. "Did you memorise the dos and don'ts for my prescription drugs as well?"
"Well someone needs to!" Toby stood up and picked up the empty glass.
"I'm sorry," Sam said quietly.
Toby sighed and perched on the coffee table in front of Sam. "You don't need to be." He rolled the glass around in his hands and looked down at the drop of liquid that spun inside of it. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I think you've just witnessed a pretty good demonstration of why I thought not telling was the way to go."
"Yeah, but we could have controlled this, told Josh in a way you were comfortable with." Toby stilled the glass and placed it back on the table. "You could have told me."
Sam shrugged but his words made a lie of the easy gesture. "Now it goes on and on and on. Now I'll be speaking to Ron, looking at more mug shots, going through all my emails, correspondence and past meetings with agents, making new statements and for Josh it will be even worse and that means the administration will have two senior staffers out of commission. It will just go on now and I won't be-"
"Won't be what?"
"In control."
Toby stood and came to sit next to Sam. "Did you feel in control before?"
"Yes, no, slightly I suppose. No one knew the truth except me. I thought I could make it go away." Sam closed his eyes and shook his head. "That was pretty stupid."
"Naïve maybe but understandable." The two men sat in silence for a few moments. The phone's sudden, shrill ringing made them jump. Toby answered in monosyllabic words before hanging up and returning to the sofa. "That was Josh. He got home okay." Sam nodded in response. "He was out of line. He knows that and you know that he didn't mean what he said."
"Do I?" Sam questioned.
Toby didn't have much sympathy with Josh and so was finding it hard to play the role of peacemaker. "No, you probably don't but you do know that everything Josh said was because he was upset after finding out the truth."
Sam tipped his head back and sighed. He closed his eyes and rubbed absently at the stab wound on his arm.
"I know it's hard but you have to remember that what happened with Gillmore wasn't what Josh intended to happen." A soft snort came from beside him but Toby continued. "That's not to say that what he intended wasn't bad but we know that Josh would never have put someone through what Gillmore's wife has been through, intentionally."
Sam opened his eyes and blew out a long breath.
"You also have to realise that Josh is devastated to learn that the beating was because of his actions but he's not going to just come out and say it, not yet anyway, so you just need to-"
"Hit him again," Sam interrupted, "I just need to hit him again because for that brief moment I actually felt unafraid, I actually found a use for the anger and fear. So, forgive me if I don't want to sit here discussing Josh's motives and feelings. He said I was known as his friend more than a politician and I don't care how upset he was that was a fucking shitty thing to say." Sam stood up and looked down at Toby. "And you know what? I think he believes it too. He thinks I can't handle the big bad world of real politics. He thinks I can craft a decent speech and look good for the press but when it comes to policy, well, he stopped talking to me about that a long time ago."
Toby saw exhaustion etched so clearly on his face that he saved his reply and suggested Sam go to bed instead. "You're tired and you're upset. Get some sleep. We'll deal with this tomorrow." Toby watched as Sam turned and walked towards the spare room. He was just about to enter when Toby called his name. "You know, policy isn't much without a decent speech to inspire people to believe in it." For the first time since Josh had arrived Toby saw a smile flit across Sam's face. He locked eyes with Toby for a moment and then went into the room.
Josh had lied. He wasn't home. His nose had stopped bleeding though so he supposed that was something. He pressed the buzzer again and waited. Finally the door was opened a crack and then more fully. "Not again!" was mumbled as Donna reached forward and guided Josh towards the sofa.
"I don't know," Toby kept the phone lodged between his shoulder and ear as he buttered a slice of toast. "He doesn't know either." He placed the knife down and held the phone in his hand once more. "He's okay, hasn't really said much." He walked towards the door and picked the paper up off the mat. "Toast, I'm eating toast." Returning to the kitchen he placed a glass of orange on a tray and poured one for himself. "I'm going to speak to him, see what he wants to do." A cup of coffee was added and the phone tucked back on his shoulder as he lifted the tray. "Yeah, you talk to Josh, and then we'll meet and decide where to go from there." He said goodbye to Leo and balanced the tray carefully as he knocked on the door. There was a mumbled reply and so Toby pushed it open and placed the tray on the bedside table. Slowly, the tangled mass of comforter untwisted and Sam emerged from beneath it.
"Hey," he croaked as he pushed the pillows up behind him and sat back. He knew Toby had to go to work soon but he also knew that he needed to talk to him before he did. He took a few sips of the juice and tried to allow the cool liquid to help him become more alert. Placing the glass back down, he looked up at Toby. "Okay, so what are we going to do?"
"Leo's going to talk to Josh."
Sam frowned. "That's the plan?"
"And I'm going to talk to you."
"Ah, and then, let me guess, you're going to talk to Leo."
Toby rolled his eyes and perched on the edge of the bed. "That's about it, yeah."
"Good plan," Sam said reaching once more for the juice.
"What do you want to happen? You know that we have to tell Ron now, that's out of our control, but what do you want to happen?"
Sam considered Toby's question for a few moments and then sat up straighter before replying. "I want to go back to that night and instead of going outside when Josh pissed me off I want to go to the bar and order a beer."
"Okay and now answer again but this time remember I'm not a time lord," Toby replied, amazed at his newfound patience with Sam.
"I suppose, now that Josh knows, I suppose I should say that I want to find out who was behind it but I don't."
"They could do it again. They've got away with it so they could do it again. Maybe they've done it before." Toby sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You don't believe that for a moment. This wasn't done by someone who's out there waiting for his next innocent victim. This was an act of revenge, plain and simple, a message to the enemies of Gillmore but with boots, fists and knives instead of email and delivered by two paid thugs. What are we going to learn by having a couple of names, that there are vindictive, violent men roaming the corridors of DC? Well, I think we already knew that."
"Okay." Toby stood and picked up Sam's empty glass. "I'll make sure the others know how you feel but I'm going to be guided by Leo on this one. If he thinks we go public then we do. I know you're seeing it all personally but I also know you're wise enough to see the bigger picture." Toby looked down at Sam and pulled a face that invited Sam to agree.
"Not sure I care too much about the bigger picture anymore, Toby." Sam held Toby's stare for only a moment before looking away again. "Go to work, have your powwows and then let me know what I'm in for." Sam watched as Toby nodded and then turned towards the door. "I'm not doing any press though," Sam called after him, "not one interview, article or statement." Again Toby nodded and Sam heard the sound of the glass being placed on the sideboard and then the front door closing before he rolled over and went back to sleep.
