Defeated

Chapter 12

Rose's POV

We left the plane and got in the car the new head guardian at St. Vladimir's Academy had sent. It was such a relief being off the air plane.

An hour after take off I finally got situated enough to fall asleep. Here just a little over seven hours later we we're in the car driving to court and I soon feel back to sleep with my head on Dimitri's shoulder and his arm around me.

"Rose" Dimitri woke me up when we got to court, a two hour ride later.

I stretched and yawned. "What time is it?"

He looked at his watch "four fifteen" he answered.

I yawned again. "Yuck, I feel like I can sleep longer."

He chuckled. "We have to get checked in."

"I know" I said getting out of the car with him.

We went to the guardian building and signed in with Guardian Chase.

"Belikov, Rose it's nice to see you again." He said greeting us.

I gave him a sleepy smile.

"Nice to see you too" Dimitri replied.

"How long are you here for?" Chase asked.

"Just a couple days" I said.

He nod to us. "Well I hope you enjoy being back while you here. Stan's new head guardian and everything is pretty much the same as ever."

Stan being head guard now made me happy I wasn't here. I gave him enough crap in class, I couldn't imagine still being a student and having to deal with him. I'm sure I would have plenty of pay back.

Chase gave us our keys and we head off to guest housing. My parents had a separate room a few doors down. Dimitri stayed with me of course.

"So now that we're here what do you plan on doing? I still don't know why we are here of all places."

I let out a sigh. I wasn't sure how to tell him. I mean when I told him about Mason he didn't say he didn't believe me but it took his time to understand. Now the dreams I felt un easy telling him just yet.

"Well do you remember when I found out about shadow kissed?" I asked.

He nods. "Yeah, you had a theory that pretty much turned out dead on." He gave me a questioning look.

"Well, it's kind of like that again but still not sure. I just need to talk with someone first to see if I can figure anything out. It still maybe nothing but bad dreams."

Which I was really hoping.

"Will you tell me about them?"

I hated that I just couldn't yet but I had a good reason. If they we're true I knew it would just scare him, and scaring Dimitri isn't an easy thing.

"I promise I will, but can I do this first than we can talk?"

He let out breathe and nod his head to me. "Yeah, I can do that much."

I smiled at him but it didn't feel a hundred percent really. So I kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you" I said.

It was only four forty-five so I decided to get in the shower. When I got out I combed my hair and blew dry it straight.

I put on a simple white cotton dress. I had lots of them, taken full advantage of being pregnant and getting to wear what I ever I want was nice, instead of usual jeans or what knot.

It had wide straps and black lining that tied at the top and two front pockets that were designed with checkered black and white across the top of the pockets.

I pulled my hair up to half down half up and put on one of the retro sixties style head bands and a pair of black beaded thongs.

I looked seriously cute, even though my bump was unrecognizable underneath the dress.

I stepped out of the bathroom and saw Dimitri had a smile spread across his face, touching his eyes.

"You look beautiful"

I smiled back. "Do you think this is appropriate enough?" I asked worriedly.

"Rose, the man has seen you grow up and run around this place for over ten year, I don't think it matter what you wear as long as you cover yourself up."

That got a laugh out of me.

"Maybe I should take a cardigan just incase."

I went to my suit case and grabbed my black cardigan and my red with white polka dots Jessica Simpson tote. I loved this bag, Dimitri had gotten it for me a week ago as a 'Just because' gift.

I walked over to Dimitri and gave him a kiss. "I have my cell phone but this is something I need to do alone." I told him.

He got uneasy. "At least let me walk you there."

"Okay, but that's it, you can't stick around." I told him looking at him. "You promised me and I told you I will talk to you about this just give me the time I need. Plus there's no crazy Tasha running around here, I doubt I will be in trouble here."

He gave me a side ways look. "Not the point." Was all he said.

He walked with me hand in hand to the church building and before I went in I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'll call you when I'm done."

"Okay, I love you"

"I love you too." I said.

He turned to leave as I opened the door and went in side. I saw the church was empty except for a man standing by a long table filled with rows of candles lit.

I wasn't religious or anything but the church had always caught my eye, with the stain glass windows and sculptors and organ. It really was a beautiful place, too bad I wasn't religious right?

I walked over to the man and stopped a few feet away. "Hello father" I said.

He turned around and gave me a big smile that reached his eyes "Rosemarie, I'm glad you here finally." He shook my hand. "How was your flight? Please let's go to my office."

We walked to his office on the other side of the church down a long hall way and to a room on the left. I had never noticed how big the church was aside from the main sanctuary, guess it made since I mean the younger kids still went to study and all and even some of the older kids, mainly because they we're royal and parents made them, just as there parents had.

I took a seat across from the priest. "Rose, what can I do for you? What has brought you all the way back from court so soon and in your condition?"

I let out a soft sigh. "Anna, I need to know about her."

His face dropped from the smile to a blank look, a mask almost.

"I thought you did that about a year ago."

I shook my head. "No, I studied Vladimir and that was to help Lissa."

I took a deep breathe; I didn't know how to explain this. Best to start from the beginning

"You see, I found out I was pregnant before I left for court." His eyes cast down to my stomach then to my left hand.

I put my right over my hand, automatically playing with my engagement ring.

"Congratulations Guardian Hathaway." He said.

I gave him a small smile, this was going to be weird. "Thank you."

"Are you alright?" He asked.

I nod my head. "I'm not really sure, actually."

"What do you mean?"

Sigh. "I, umm" Just say it Rose, I told myself. "Do you know who the father is, have you heard?"

I didn't know how much everyone knew, I knew my friends and family we're keeping it to ourselves and it hadn't gotten around court, yet at least.

"No, I actually didn't know you were with child until now."

Well here goes nothing. "See here's the things; this was supposed to be totally impossible, unable to ever happen."

I noticed he had an uneasy look on his face and I wanted to ask but I didn't.

"Guardian Dimitri Belikov is the father."

Please don't let my dreams be right, please don't.

But they we're with his in take of breath, like he was gasping for air.

"What does Anna have to do with this?" He asked wanting to look any where but me.

"I don't know if she even does." I admitted. "I have had dreams, well two. One was kind of weird but the second" I said shaking my head. "I didn't know what to make of it. I don't know anything about Anna, but what I do know is she is the only known spirit user ever asides from me.

"And you want to know if I have any thing you can use to learn about her." He finished for me.

I nod to him and swallowed. "You see things for me haven't been safe at court. My doctor is trying to get me into testing myself; The Queen has tried to compel me into testing, although there is not many who know that." I finished.

He stood up and gestured me to fallow him. We walked out of his office and back to the sanctuary.

"I never in my life thought this would happen." He stated and I gave him a questioning look.

He shook his head at me as he opened the door to the attic. He turned on a light and climbed the dusty stairs. We walked in and made our way to the back to a bookshelf.

"Help me" He said getting to one side. I went to the other and grabbed the shelf. "You push, I'll pull" He stated.

I nod and honestly I don't think he needed my help because I barely pushed.

We moved the bookshelf to find a door.

Wow and Christian never found this, ha.

The priest opened the door and turned on a light there was a small case of stairs that went up. We took the stairs to another door that opened to a room that filled the walls with book shelves a chair and a side table.

"What is this?" I asked.

He smiled. "This is secret, which not even The Queen herself knows. There is one Queen who does and she has died long ago with the secret."

I looked around astounded I didn't know what to say. The books were some thick and some thin, but all old. Some where bound by nothing more than string; but every last one of them were kept in good condition.

Well as good as can be expected.

Walking to a shelf and grabbing a book he took a seat as I made my way around the room.

"You see there are things here that are so old we can't put a date on them. Written things on people either by them or someone who live with or not long after them. Family members or friends of names I cannot mention.

I looked at him. "Where did this all come from."

He cleared his throat. "It has been passed down from priest to priest. Started at the church of the original court in Europe, when court was moved to the state a priest who worked there moved to becoming the new priest for the court. He had all of this, you see" gesturing around.

"Well when he passed away, the priest who worked here at the time was a close friend. For years this was passed down from priest to priest never making its way to the public.

"Are you the only one who knows about it now?" I asked curiously.

He nod his head still not facing me but looking at a book. "I am and now you are."

"Why? Why tell me now?" I asked.

He cleared his throat and closed the book. His eyes we're glossed over with what looked like unshed tears.

"There is reason for that and I will gladly answer you after you read this." He said handing me the small hard pig skinned covered book.

"This will do you more wonders than you can ever imagine. I'm sorry I never talked to you about her, I honestly could not. Not until, well." He said pulling his hands out and gesturing around to nothing in particular.

"Like I said you need to read it. How long are you here for?"

I looked up at him again from the book. "A day or two, I only came to speak with you."

He nod his head again. "We'll in that case I will be at court in a few weeks; Princess Vasilisa has been in touch with me and asked me to marry her and Lord Ozera." He said with a smile on his face.

I nod my head in return. I actually almost forget she had asked him to marry them. "That will be fine, I'm sure we will be in touch." Knowing I was made of honor and all.

I held up the book. "What is this anyways?" There was no title and I hadn't flipped through it yet to look at it.

"That Rose" He said pointing. "Is something you can not tell anyone about. The princess yes, Dimitri has a right to know too, but I would take it to heart on who else you tell. You and Anna have more in common than you can even imagine." He had a soft look in his eyes when he said that.

"But that Rose is the personal diary of Anna."

I think my mouth hit the floor.

"It's not just any diary; it is the finale diary, complete of the last days of her life."

I looked at it again and thought oh my god.

I looked back at him. "But how can this help me? Anna died crazy because Vladimir died. How does this help me with my 'condition'" I said for the lack of words.

"Keep in mind, not everything made to the public eye is the truth, not everything is as it seems. I will explain later" He said point back to the book. "After you finish with this but if there is ever anything you need before I see you again, please call me, have Dimitri or Lissa call if you decide to tell them."

Rendered speechless I nod again. I swallow back the bile in my throat. "Thank you"

He nod back to me, it seemed kind of sad. We walked back to the door and turned the light off before shutting and locking the door. Back down the stairs to shut and lock that door, moving the book shelf back in front of it. Hand prints we're left where we moved the shelf but I'm sure the dust would gather back soon.

We walked back to the sanctuary and I noticed he locked the door to the attic now too. I smiled at that; I guess he started that after Christian was found knocked out up there.

I thanked him again and put the book in my tote bag in a zipper part to make sure no damage was done. I walked out the front of the church and called Dimitri.

"Hey babe, Where are you?" I asked.

"The office talking with Stan, Where are you?"

"Outside the church walking your way" I heard him groan.

"I'll meet you half way."

"Kay, love you."

"Love you too." He said and I hung up when I saw him come into view.

It was kind of funny because some students we're here and most were gone for the summer. The ones who were here looked at Dimitri as he passed and I couldn't help but think they had to think the same thing I had.

Look at that god. Ha. I laughed to myself at the memory when I came home after two years on the run and how Mason described him.

Mason, I missed him. Another memory to come to mind as well, he had helped me get the books from Christian who in turned took them from the attic of the church, that helped me learn of spirit, and how Anna died.

I smiled a sad small smile to the fact and walked up to Dimitri who wrapped me in a hug and kissed me on the cheek.

"How did everything go?" He asked.

I kissed his cheek back and pulled away. "I don't know."

He gave me a puzzled look. "You don't know?" and he chuckled wrapping an arm around my shoulders and walking with me.

I just nod. "We will talk soon, don't worry." I said and rested my head on his chest as we walked

"Are you hungry?" He asked.

In answer my stomach growled. "Yeah"

"Well let's get something to eat to start with."

We went to the dinner hall and ate lunch. Too impatient to go out some where, when we were done I realized I was tired again so we went back to our room.

I hit the bed as Dimitri slid down to his boxers and pulled off his shirt. I had already pulled off my dress and slid down to my under things and climbed in bed.

"Hurry up, I'm getting cold in here all by myself."

He chuckled. "Impatient today are we?" He teased.

I shrugged "maybe a little."

"So how did it go with the priest?"

Well, I might as well tell him.

"It was neat, I guess you can say."

He raised an eyebrow.

"Well, not what I expected." I climbed out of bed and grabbed my bag bringing it with me.

I sat back in bed and pulled the sheets over me and pulled the book out setting my bag on the floor by the bed.

"He gave me this." I said running my hand over the cover.

"What is it?"

"Not a western." I mumbled and smiled.

"Ha ha, very funny"

It was. "Actually, this is one of Anna's diaries, jurnals, whatever you call them."

He raised his eye brow again. "Where did he get it?"

I took a breath. "That's the thing, you can't say anything to anyone and the only person you will be able to talk about it with is Lissa and that's not until I finish reading it and then tell her, if I even will. He said I would want to but I don't know." I said shaking my head at the last part.

"Okay, tell no one."

I looked at him. "I'm serious. This has been kept from the public, the queen herself. No one knows and everyone who has, died with the secret."

He nod to me. "I won't tell."

So I continue. "This isn't any diary, this is her finale one."

He had the same reaction I did. "Have you read it yet?"

I shook my head. "No. I wanted to wait till I was home. I think it will take a while and I want to make sure I'm in complete privacy."

He nod and agreement this time. "I understand."

After talking we laid in silence and fell asleep. It was the first time in day I had a good night with no dreams or nightmares.

The rest of our time at the academy went by fast and quiet. Dimitri and my mom caught up with old friends and I spent the majority of my time with my dad. I didn't tell him about my talk with the priest or the book I got.

I loved my dad but I knew his business. If he had a clue of this no doubt would he use it to his advantage, sad I know but this was secret no one knew.

We came home yesterday and when we walked in the door the house was a wreck with boxes every where. Lissa was running back and forth between houses with Langston and Alberta.

Christian, Mikhail, and Dimitri were here packing up things and I wasn't aloud to lift a thing. No matter what it was.

"At least let me pack my own things then!" I said to Dimitri who was in our closet with boxes and at the clothes rack.

He shook his head. "Why don't you just tell me how you want them and I will pack them up and take them there."

I groaned. "You have got to be kidding me, what am I going to do while everyone is doing something sit on my but?"

He tried to hide his laugh. "Rose you know you aren't supposed to be doing anything, think of the babies."

He was right and I knew it. "Fine, I'm going to go to the other house then and see Lissa."

"Rose, you shouldn't be alone and you know that. Not with Tasha around, she's unpredictable."

"I can go with her. I'm finished packing anyways and need to move boxes there anyways."

I smiled and turned to see Mikhail in the door way.

"See I won't be alone." I said smiling at Dimitri.

He wasn't smiling; in fact he didn't seem happy at all.

"Are you just going to drop off your stuff and come back?" He asked Mikhail.

"No, Lissa needs another guy for something also, apparently Alberta can't reach something." He shrugged. "It's no big deal, Christians coming too; he needs to take some stuff over also."

Dimitri seemed to lighten about that. What the hell was up with that? Men, I swear.

"Okay" Dimitri came over to me and kissed me. "Call me if you want me to come get you to bring you back."

I kissed him back and smiled. "I don't think we're coming back tonight babe, I have a bag packed it's by the bed." I said pointing he turned to look and I snuck a kiss on his jaw line and down his neck. I could feel him smile. I pulled away. "When you get a load of boxes and things in your car grab the bag and come to the house, we're staying there tonight."

"Okay, I'll call you when I leave then."

"Love you, bye." I kissed him again and grabbed my tote bag, which still held the book no one knew I had and walked out the door.

As I walked out the door I heard him call back "I love you too Roza."

I smiled to myself, the luckiest girl in the world. I met Christian and Mikhail out side by Christian's car. Like me was a Audi, except his was a dark blue A5 Cabriolet. I loved his car and envied him a little for it. It would be at least eighteen years before I could get my hands on a sports car.

Pushing the thought away and eyed the car. "So how are we all going to fit in this and with boxes at that?"

Christian laughed at me. "We aren't taking my car, we going in Mikhail's." He said.

"Oh" I said and walked to Mikhail's car with them. I got in the front seat sticking Christian in the back with some boxes.

"This is so uncomfortable; we should have taken two cars." Christian complained half way there.

"It's just a few minutes away don't whine so much." I said.

He huffed. "Easy for you to say, you're not back here." He said under his breath.

I turned on him and smiled. "You're right, I'm not because I'm pregnant."

Mikhail laughed at us and I notice him smiling at me.

"Always a charmer, aren't you?" He said.

"I try" I said.

"How was your trip Rose?" Mikhail asked.

"Great"

"Where did you go?" Christian asked.

I didn't want them to know where I went or why so I lied and tried not to feel guilty for lying to a friend.

"The mountains" I told them, which was kind of the truth.

We got to the house in no time after that with much small talk. Mikhail stopped the car and turned it off. We got out and Mikhail helped Christian out.

I went straight inside to find Lissa. We hadn't talked much since I was back and I had no clue what room any one was getting.

"Lissa" I called out walking through the door.

"Up stairs" I jumped as Langston came up beside me from on of the side rooms.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

"Not your fault, I should have my guard down." I sighed.

I went up the stairs to find Lissa. She was in one of the rooms and moving things around with Alberta.

"Hey" I said.

"That's good" She told Alberta putting down the chair they we're moving.

"Hey Rose, what are you doing here already?" She asked.

Alberta waved to me and sat in said chair.

"Ugh, I was just bored. What are you doing?" I asked.

She smiled. "Just moving things."

I nod to here. "So you're sticking to your room?"

She nod back. "Yeah, it's big enough and has a private bath." She shrugged.

"So how's this working out, I want to check out my room." I said.

She took a seat in another chair.

"Well you get a choice between four rooms. One will be yours the rest the babies. Your room is one of them of course the rest are the two between ours and the one on the other side of yours." She told me.

I had my own room here from when I spent all my summers and most holidays with Lissa and her family. They really had made me feel part of the family.

"I think I'll stick with my original room too." I said smiling.

Like Lissa's it was huge. Most of the rooms in the main house had suites. Mine, or should I say ours now had a double sink and deep soak bath with a separate stand up shower. The room was big with two closets one was a double door the other was a walk in.

"There are going to be some rules Rose, I was hoping you could spread them for me because—"

"I'll do it. You don't have to ask, I understand."

She nod to me. Thank you

I nod back.

She didn't want anyone in Andre's room or her parents. She actually had the rooms locked and no one would have a key to them except me and her.

She hand me the keys.

I looked at them in my hand for a minute. Instantly I was feeling guilty for putting her in this situation.

Don't Rose, I am happy to be back. I'm just not ready for changes yet. I'm happy to be back, really.

I looked at her and saw she was telling the truth. I nod again.

"I think I'm going to check things out if you don't mind"

She nod to me. I left and she and Alberta got back to work.

I walked down the hall to the far end and unlocked the last door on the opposite side of the hall.

I walked into Andre's room and locked the door behind me.

It was clean and orderly. Kept up just like it had been the last time I saw it.

Only the last time it was clean from Lissa and I personally cleaning it. We decided to play a joke on him and in turn we were punished to clean it up.

I walked to his dresser and laid my hand down on it feeling the wood. Like a touch could take me back there. I looked around the room.

The walls were painted in about foot wide strips of two shade of dark and medium green. Masculine but kind of pretty at the same time, the bed room suit was oak wood. The flat screen was sitting inside the oak wood armor. I opened a drawer of the dresser and pulled out a shit.

It was a navy polo. I hugged it to me and smelled it. Taken in the scent, it smelled just like he had. Had. I hate that I think of him that way but it was the truth.

And the truth hurts sometimes.

I walked over to the bed and ran my hand across the plaid Ralph Lauren comforter then laid on it still holding the shirt.

I let the few tears fall from my eyes for the first time in years.

Andre was the brother I never had, the brother taken away too soon. I never noticed how much I looked up to him until he was gone, I wished he was here.

If there was ever a time a sister would need a brother would be a time like this.

Weddings. Pregnancy. Moving.

Feel bad again, because Lissa didn't have him either and he really was her brother and not only that her parents and her wedding.

This was an important time in her life, she should have them.

I hated myself for thinking of this, but every now and then you need to vent. I'm sure my hormones aren't helping.

I pushed my tote bag next to me on the bed and held the shit to my face letting the tears fall to a stop.

I needed to calm down. Thinking of things like this, making our happy moments sad wasn't good. I will always wish they we're here, I know but there not.

I sighed to myself and looked around the room and smiled.

Flashback

It was nearly three and half years ago.

Andre was out at court with some of his friends. So Lissa and I took the advantage of getting him back to prank he played on us with putting blue hair die in our conditioner that would take at least three weeks to wear out.

We had set up his room in a total master mind of revenge and he was due back any second.

We went back to Lissa's room and climbed on the bed and got out two magazines acting like nothing was up.

Ten minutes later Andre was walking up the stairs.

"Hey, love the hair. I should get in touch with your hair dresser and see if she will do mine." He walked by smiling and laughing.

I smiled back; he had no clue what he was in for.

A few seconds later we heard him yell and things banging around.

We busted out laughing immediately.

After a few minutes he came in the room and the sight of him I started laughing harder and rolling around.

I hit the floor, I rolled off the bed.

I swear I was going to piss myself.

Andre was covered in honey and flour.

We had put a fan on his night stand with a plate in front of it with a mountain of flour on it. There was a string going from the door to the fan so when it moved the slightest bit it would turn on. Send the flour every where.

We cracked the door and set his bathroom trashcan on top which was filled three fourths the way with honey. So when he opened it, it would fall on top of him.

To top off the prank we put itching powder on his toilet paper but that was going to take a good wait I bet before he figured it out.

I finely calmed myself down and looked at Andre. I'm sure my face was bright red from laughing.

"You really shouldn't mess with someone who knows pranks better than you." I managed to say without laughing.

He didn't say anything instead he walked out slamming the door.

End Flashback

I hadn't noticed I had fallen asleep and honestly I wasn't ready to wake up from my dream. Life used to be so simple.

I sighed and opened my eyes rubbing them.

I looked over and smiled. Lissa was lying in bed with me.

"Hey sleep head. You gave us a good scare, had no clue where you were." She said.

I smiled at her and looked over to see Dimitri was standing in the room looking a little uncomfortable. I smiled at him too.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to be alone for a minute and well" I shrugged.

Lissa wrapped me in a hug. "I know. I miss them too."

I hugged her back and sighed again.

"I think my hormones are starting to really get to me."

The both laughed. Dimitri walked over and took my hand knelling by the bed and kissed it.

"Are you okay?"

"I am now." I letting him know that I was fine.

I sat up in bed and the shirt fell from my side. Lissa picked it up and looked at me.

I blushed.

She didn't say anything but folded it back and got up to put it in the drawer.

She put it away and grabbed something off the dresser.

I felt the pain through the bond.

I got up and went to stand behind her.

It was a picture of use three one winter at a ski resort. I hugged Lissa from behind and she turned in my arms. I felt the tears fall on my shoulder.

Dimitri got up and walked out of the room closing the door behind him to give us our moment.

It was the first time in years either of us had given into our emotions like this, allowing ourselves to dwell on the past.

"We'll be okay, we have each other still."

She nod into my shoulder and calmed down a little but I could still feel a few silent tears.

I looked through the bond to see she was thinking my earlier thoughts.

Family should be here to share these times with us.

She let out a breath and put the picture back. Went to the bathroom and splashed her face with cold water. I went to the bed and straightened it back and grabbed my tote.

We turn off the lights and walked out of the room locking the door behind us.

Review please.

I own nothing except this plot, Langston, Dr. Thomae, & Kaleena. Also the babies.

What do you think? I May add more tonight/tomorrow.