**ALL CHARACTERS AND EVERYTHING MORTAL INSTRUMENTS RELATED IS OWNED BY CASSANDRA CLARE**
Chapter Song: Hey Now - Augustana
*All lyrics to Hey Now belong to Augstana and its respective owners*
The sound of leaves crunching under feet could be heard as he made his way through the cemetery. He stopped in front of one particular grave, in his hand were two roses. One was red the other was white. It had been exactly one month since the day she died and he could remember everything like it was yesterday. The memories of that day still haunted him.
"Jace, I love you." He never stopped questioning whether she actually said it or if he just heard it.
The funeral service was small and short. Along with himself and their friends, there were a few family friends that showed up, but otherwise it was a small, intimate crowd. Clary's mother and Luke were there also, but she didn't make eye contact with anyone. At the cemetery he was the first one to go up to the casket. In his hand he held two roses.
"What do they mean?" He heard Izzy quietly ask next to him.
"The red one is for love, the white one is a symbol of humility. It also means 'I'm worthy of you.' She did that for me. She made me feel like I had worth, that I was worthy enough to be with her. Together they mean 'unity'."
Izzy placed a hand on his shoulder. "She really loved you, Jace. Anyone could see that."
"I still love her. I will always love her."
Sebastian's funeral was that same day, but he wasn't going to stay for that. He kissed both roses and placed them on the top of the casket.
Shaking his head at the memory, he sat down in front of the tombstone. "Hi, love." He still felt the pain of her death every day.
"Well the good news today is that I am officially moved in with Izzy and Alec. I got a few bruises from my dad, but it's nothing I can't handle. And I've gone a whole week without cutting now."
After Clary's funeral he started cutting again. He rather feel the physical pain than the gaping hole in his chest. But he did his best to stop once he started moving into Izzy and Alec's apartment. Since her death he's felt empty, emptier than ever before. A piece of him was missing; it died along with Clary that day. He stopped talking to people, for the most part. He spoke the most when he was here, on his daily visits to her grave. Sometimes he spent hours just sitting and talking, sometimes the sadness was too overwhelming so he only stayed for a few minutes.
"I'm still lost without you, Clary. I don't know who I am anymore, the only time I ever knew was when I was with you. I feel like I'm not even here. Hell, I don't even want to be here. I want to be with you, wherever that is."
A few times he thought about suicide, but he couldn't do it. Her last wish was that he continue to live. How would she feel if she found out that he didn't listen to her? She also asked that he move on and find someone else. How could she ask that of him? He wouldn't – no, couldn't – do that. Clary was his everything, there is no way that he would want to replace her. The thought of another taking her place was revolting. He only wanted Clary, he only needed Clary.
"I can't move on, not yet at least. Maybe not ever. I still feel you with me, Clary, and I never want that feeling to go away."
He thought of how fast his life changed. It only took a week for his life to be completely turned around and then turned back again. He remembered the first time he ever saw Clary. She was so radiant, like the light in the darkness of his life. Never had he ever believed in love at first sight, or love at all. But once he met her all that changed. Everything he ever believed was turned upside down.
Looking back on that night in the club, he thought that asking Clary to meet him the next day was too forward, but now he thought of it as the best decision he'd ever made. From that moment on, the pull and desire to be right next to her was undeniable and indescribable.
He looked up at the sky and saw that it had darkened a bit. Rain was coming. He placed the two roses against her tombstone and stood up. Looking down at her grave he spoke the last words he said to her right before she died.
"I love you, Clary."
As he turned to walk away he felt the first few raindrops fall until it became a steady shower.
Worth and love, intertwined to create unity. They were one, Jace and Clary. They gave to one what the other was missing, they completed each other. At her grave, the two roses that represented both of them, were being drenched. The rain came down hard and steady, as if it was the bottled up tears of a broken man, crying over his lost love.
~FIN.
A/N: Well this was a short last chapter, but hopefully it conveyed Jace's emotions.
Thank you thank you thank you to everyone for sticking with me on this emotional roller coaster of a story. It was my first one and all your support helped me so much!
If there were any loose ends that I didn't hit or if you are confused about anything just ask and I'll try to clear it up. I posted a playlist on my profile for this story. Its short but includes the songs from the chapters. The song 'Bittersweet Symphony' is on there just because I feel like its a good "credits" song. :)
Thanks again for all the review and adds to favorites/alerts! :D
