Title: Bonne Foi
Author: Amethyst Jackson
Category: Drama, Romance
Rating: M
Summary: AU. Edward Masen was changed in 1918 and abandoned by his sire. He feeds on human blood, unaware of any other way…until he stumbles across college freshman Bella Swan for a night that will change everything.
Disclaimer: A writer is like a goddess in her universe…but only one writer is making the money off Twilight, and that's Stephenie Meyer. These are her characters, and I'm just having fun with them. "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" is by T.S. Eliot.
Chapter Twelve
I went to see Bella at work the next day. There was no good excuse for it. I knew that we wouldn't be having sex again before she left, especially not at her workplace – not after what had happened Wednesday night. But there was a gnawing, nagging feeling inside me that compelled me to see her, to confirm her tie to me somehow before she was gone.
I scanned the thoughts inside of the café before I entered. The boy wasn't working, but the vulgar woman was. Just one more thing to deal with, I thought with a sigh.
After just a week of her presence, the whole shop smelled of Bella. It hit me hard as soon as I walked in, appallingly luscious. How strongly would that scent strike me after three days away from her?
Her eyes met mine across the counter, and she gave me a brilliant smile. I made my way to her quickly.
"Edward, I didn't think I'd get to see you again until Monday."
I shrugged. "That was just…unacceptable."
"Bella!" an unpleasant voice barked. The irritating woman had materialized from the back room. "We're not paying you to socialize."
Bella sighed and turned to the mixing cups she'd apparently been cleaning. I shot a glare at the woman, who seemed confused by my unfriendliness. I knew I'd led her on a bit the first day, but I still couldn't fathom why this woman thought she merited my attention. There was nothing remotely genuine or soft or graceful about her brand of beauty; she was plastic and artificial. And yet, I could see from her mind that she thought herself better than Bella, and was treating her badly out of spite and envy. That could not be allowed to go on.
"Sorry," Bella murmured to me under her breath. "She's…strict."
"She seems like a tyrant to me," I scowled, speaking loudly enough that the woman could hear me. She huffed and returned to the back.
"You should report her if she's treating you unfairly."
Bella shrugged and offered a half smile. "She's not here often enough when I'm working to be a real problem."
I frowned. "If you say so."
She set aside her work again and leaned across the counter to me. "I'm really glad you came," she told me.
I smiled.
I wasn't able to be with Bella for long. A rush of customers came in, and I had to leave her to her job. I checked the clock for the umpteenth time. 5:30. She would be well on her way by now.
I sighed again and paced to my bookshelf. I had to occupy my mind somehow, or I would go mad this weekend. Maybe I would make a trip to Seattle. I was curious about Sartre, after all of Bella's enthusiasm for him, but I didn't own any of his work. A trip to the bookstore would take up some time. Maybe I would hunt, too. I didn't particularly feel like trying to do it the normal way and failing again, so perhaps I could range further into the wilderness and explore my options in the animal kingdom.
But for now, what to read? I thumbed through the volumes. Dickens? No, I wasn't remotely in the mood for that. Nabokov…fascinating, but not what I was looking for. Twain? No, too humorous for my mood. My hand still at T.S. Eliot. Maybe poetry would suit me best now. I pulled out the book and took it to the couch, opening by chance to The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.
I had read the poem before and had found the voice unsympathetic – the whining of a lonely old man who wasn't developed enough to be satisfied in his solitude, a man who was too afraid to take what he wanted. Would my perceptions change upon a second look, as they had with The Stranger?
I reread carefully. This time through, I kept seeing myself in the words.
And indeed there will be time
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
There will be time, there will be time
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
There will be time to murder and create,
And time for all the works and days of hands
That lift and drop a question on your plate;
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.
The passage was meant to be ironic, pointing to man's unwillingness to accept his lack of time, his looming mortality. It was a reminder, carpe diem. Seize the day.
And yet, I did have time – a limitless expanse of it, stretching out before me. What was I doing with it? For so many years, I'd reveled in the knowledge that I had time on my side, time to do anything and everything I wanted. But now…now time felt like a crushing weight on my shoulders.
…I no longer knew what I wanted to make of that time. No, that wasn't right. I had never known what I wanted.
And indeed there will be time
To wonder, "Do I dare?" and, "Do I dare?"
Time to turn back and descend the stair,
With a bald spot in the middle of my hair—
They will say: "How his hair is growing thin!"]
My morning coat, my collar mounting firmly to the chin,
My necktie rich and modest, but asserted by a simple pin—
[They will say: "But how his arms and legs are thin!"]
Do I dare
Disturb the universe?
In a minute there is time
For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.
Well, at least I had something going for me. I had definitely dared to disturb the universe. I had turned my prey into a plaything, was going out of my way to please her, even… I had turned the natural order upside down. No one could accuse me of being conventional. No vampire, at least.
The loud, shrill tone of a cell phone jarred me out of my thoughts. Bella. Bella was calling. I was up in an instant, book clattering to the floor as I darted to my bedside table where the phone lay.
Had she been unable to resist the temptation of the little device? Or did she miss me already? I flipped it open and held it to my ear.
"Bella?"
"Edward, thank God."
I frowned. The phone dulled and garbled the natural tone of her voice, but I thought she sounded…relieved? But stressed as well.
"What's wrong?"
"It's – it's not a big deal," she said quickly. "But my truck broke down, and I was hoping you could maybe call a tow truck for me? It's just, I'm out in the middle of nowhere, basically, and there's nowhere I can go to get help, and my dad isn't picking up –"
"Where are you?" I interrupted. That gnawing feeling was back, stronger now.
"I'm on the 101," she told me, giving the last mile-marker she'd passed. "I'm still over an hour from Forks."
I frowned. So she would be waiting another hour or more, alone and vulnerable, for the tow to arrive, and an hour or more ride with a strange man… The gnawing grew.
I obtained the rest of the information I would need from Bella for the tow truck driver. "Oh, and Bella?"
"Yeah?"
"Do me a favor? Stay in your truck and lock the doors."
She laughed. "Just what do you think is going to happen to me out here? I don't think there's another human around for miles. But maybe there are some bears I should be worried about."
I rolled my eyes. "Just do it, Bella, please."
She sighed. "All right. Thanks for helping me, Edward."
"Of course."
As soon as I hung up with Bella, I was moving. I had to go to her; anything could happen to her right now. She couldn't be harmed, not when she was mine. I dialed information as I tugged on shoes. They could only offer two towing companies based in Forks. I called the first as I was going out the door, frustrated at having to move at a human pace outside of my apartment. No one picked up. I rolled my eyes and hopped into my car. It purred to life and I was off, racing toward the highway.
At the second company, a rather uncooperative and slow woman picked up. I had to relay the situation to her twice before she understood, and then she informed me that it would take two hours for the next available truck to get to her location.
Imbeciles. Didn't they understand the urgency here?
I drove at twice the legal speed limit, slowing only once when I heard the bored thoughts of a highway patrolman ahead. Gliding by him at a crawling 70 miles per hour was torture, but as soon as I was out of his sight, I shot up to 150 again. Never had I been so grateful for fast cars.
I had never seen Bella's truck before, but she had described it for the tow driver and had given the license plate number. The rusty orange-red Chevy couldn't be mistaken; surely there couldn't be two of those old machines running today.
I pulled up behind her, and she was out of her vehicle almost as quickly as I was. I took two steps toward her before she was flinging herself into me, where my arms caught her and held her close.
"I thought I told you to stay in the truck," I chastised. "I could have been an axe-murderer or a serial rapist."
"Shut up," she laughed weakly, her face pressed against my chest. "As if anyone else would be pulling up in that."
"Point taken," I chuckled, incredibly relieved. She was with me. She was safe. And suddenly it was abundantly clear what that gnawing sensation had been – worry. I had been worried about what would happen to her away from me. I frowned. I hadn't worried about anything in decades. There was nothing to worry about.
"How did you get here so fast?" Bella asked with a scowl, pulling away from me slightly.
"I went double the speed limit," I told her frankly.
"Why? What if you had been stopped? You could have been arrested for driving that fast."
"There was hardly anyone to see me," I pointed out, feeling the need to defend my actions. "I couldn't just leave you out here by yourself. The tow truck was going to take two hours and then you would have had an hour back alone with a stranger. I shudder to think what could have happened to you."
"Oh, Edward, what am I going to do with you?" she sighed, shaking her head.
I frowned, unable to see what had displeased her. "I thought you seemed rather happy to see me a minute ago."
Bella smiled and stood up on tiptoes to kiss me softly. "I am happy to see you. I have to admit, it was really you I wanted when I called. I mean, I could have called Angela just as easily, but…I was anxious, and I wanted to hear your voice. So I'm very, very glad to have you here now. But I don't want you risking arrest to get to me."
She had longed for me in her distress? That was something to consider…but later. I didn't want to think about what that meant now.
"Why don't we wait in my car until the tow arrives?" I suggested to her.
"Why don't we sit in my truck?" she countered.
"Leather bucket seats, that's why," I said, feeling that made my case. Bella rolled her eyes, but allowed me to steer her over to the passenger side of my car. Once she was securely in, I returned to the driver's seat.
"Edward?"
I turned to look at her. Under the protection of the dark-tinted windows, it was like our own private bubble. "Yes?"
"Thank you."
"For what?" Hadn't she just requested I not do what I'd done?
"For coming all this way just to get me…for caring that much," she blushed, looking down at her hands.
Her words left me unsettled. Was that what this was? Was the worry I had felt evidence of caring? Another thing to consider, later, when I was alone. For now…
"You're welcome," I said simply, daring to meet her bright eyes.
Bella smiled back at me, then frowned. "This is why we should have sat in my truck."
"Why is that?" I quirked an eyebrow. Her thoughts were impossible to keep up with.
She gestured to the center console between us. "Nothing in the way in my truck."
I laughed and pushed my seat all the way back before lifting her into my lap. She laughed in surprise.
"Okay, well, that's one way around it."
"A cozy way," I pointed out, her warmth pressed everywhere against me. I leaned in and pressed a kiss to the soft beat of her pulse in her neck. Flicking my tongue out, I could almost taste her.
"Um…maybe you shouldn't start that…y'know, with the tow truck coming and all."
"Well, first of all," I said, trailing my lips down her neck, "the truck won't be here for at least an hour, probably more, given what I was told. Secondly," I switched to the other side of her neck, "just where do you think this is going?"
A blush started on her neck and traveled up to her cheeks. I could feel the heat against my face. "Where it always goes."
I smirked against her skin. "Have you ever had sex in a car, Bella?"
She rolled her eyes at me, but her heart was racing. "Obviously not, since I've only ever had sex with you."
"Hmm…I never have either." I kissed the sensitive underside of her jaw. "Would you like to try it with me?"
She laughed and her hands trailed almost idly over the buttons of my shirt. "All in the name of exploration, right?"
"Right," I chuckled, tracing that familiar path underneath her shirt, up her tapered waist, over the soft hills of her breasts. She truly was a magnificent creature, my Bella, a Pandora's Box of sensual delights, and I'd never be able to put them away again.
While her fingers slipped and struggled with the buttons of my shirt, I found the clasp of her bra and popped it open, leaving the undergarment loose enough for me to slide my hands under the cups. How could anything be so soft?
She finally opened my shirt, and her palms flattened against my chest before they dragged down my torso. I moaned at the trail of heat.
Bella leaned in and pressed a kiss to my lips. It seemed almost…shy, which struck me as odd. What did she have to be shy about at this point? But then her mouth pressed harder, and her right hand snuck between us to unfasten my jeans. My feisty Bella made a triumphant return.
Getting Bella out of her jeans was a little more difficult, but with a little maneuvering and a lot of help, she finally kicked them off. She slid back into my lap, just a damp patch of fabric between us now. I pushed the soft cotton aside and dipped my fingers inside, testing her. How was she always ready for me? Unable to resist, I brought my two fingers to my mouth, tasting the wetness that lingered there. Her eyes darkened at the sight.
"You like that? You like seeing me taste you?" I smirked.
She shook her head at me. "You're diabolical."
"An innocent victim," I chuckled, rubbing myself impatiently against her. "You're the temptress."
She gave a breathy laugh as I was pushing her panties aside. "Yeah, right."
I eased her onto me with a satisfied groan. "God, you feel good."
"Mmm, so do you," she sighed, her head lolled back as she shifted restlessly on top of me.
"Let me do the work," I suggested as I grabbed her hips, wanting to control the speed. She acquiesced with a nod, bracing her hands on my shoulders. I held her where I wanted her and thrust my pelvis in a steady tempo. Bella moaned as I set my pace.
Hmm, I liked her sounds. The soft vibrations of them tingled through me, adding to the sensation. I needed more sounds from her. I angled her back and moved faster, hitting a more sensitive spot. Her mouth fell open, and a louder moan came out.
"Yes, let me hear you," I told her, trying to control myself. Her heat made me want to push harder, faster. I wanted to let out all the frantic energy she inspired.
She whimpered. Her fingers dug in hard, for a human. She bit her lip and squeezed her eyes closed.
"Don't hold back," I growled. "Open your eyes, look at me. I want to know exactly how it feels. Let it out."
She made a keening sound, her eyes wild. Damn, that turned me on. I kept egging her on, listening to her sounds grow louder and louder as we came closer to release.
"Oh God, oh God, oh God," she chanted, tensing up. She was close. So was I.
"Oh!" A sharp cry signaled her peak before she fell forward, panting and moaning against me while I finished.
Spent, we lay slack in the seat. Eventually, she turned her head to look up at me, a sly glint in her eye.
"I'm beginning to wonder if you haven't got some sort of public sex fetish," she said. "What with the library, the coffeehouse, now this…"
I laughed. "No, I'm afraid it's far simpler than that. I just have a sex with Bella fetish."
She laughed, too. "I guess that's all right, then."
A/N: Okay, so I broke my promise. No Cullens this chapter. But the next one, for sure. Edward just…got a little distracted on the way to Forks, all right? I can't control him. He's insatiable.
I also realize that today is not Tuesday. I'm working on that.
