Summary: The H.E.A.T team are on assignment and this time they're dealing with two Godzilla Juniors. It's nurture vs. nature gone crazy especially when a disgruntled artist and a hyperactive ninja (guess who) become parents to giant fire breathing lizards with demon chakra powering up their pipes.
Author's Note: I don't own Naruto or Godzilla the series. This takes place in an alternate universe since I don't know how much damage bouncing baby lizards the size of football fields can make. I've been researching all over the place to make sure this story is believable. My friend and I have also thought up a few running gags to make sure this chapter is full of the now we get to see a hilariously crazy morning from multiple points of view. :D
(What happened so far)
Who would've guessed, Sakura already acts like a Chibi Tsunade. Now all she needs to do is suck her upper lip in and grow a mountainous pair of boobs. I don't really care much for romance. I only want to kill my brother and get out of this awful blasphemy of a "HUG ME" shirt. Though on second thought, maybe I could've spared myself some dignity by not calling her a bossy broad. The only thing that saved me from getting hurled was already broken bones. Instead she manhandles me by putting me over her shoulder and stalks straight after Dragon Lady and the HEAT Team.
Kaiju Chaos Kyuubi Style
Chapter 12:Good Morning America
(The Apartment of Mendel's Parents, Sasuke's Point of View)
Three days, it has been that long. Three days of poking, proding, and even donating, dare I say it, samples just for these people. They analyze everything! I already told them my sob story nine different times excluding the parts I don't want to tell them I.e. the Uchiha Massacre, the time I almost killed Naruto . . . Twice in a row, and the time I had to use the sexy jutsu in order to dress in drag and crash a wedding, I'm never going to look at lingerie the same way ever again.
On the up side Sakura finally took those accursed casts off. I actually get to have a real shower. Sponge baths are no substitute for getting immersed in hot water with the shower head set on pound. At least that was the one thing that actually made sense. Unlike the other Ninjas I worked with at the sound village, I actually liked to stay clean. Even if it meant four more days of unholy missions just to please the old snake than at least I could grab the hot water shower before anyone else woke up.
"Sasuke, hey Sasuke are you done getting pretty in there," Naruto yelled and speaking of waking up, Naruto has been pounding at the bathroom door for forty five minutes already. I won the race to the bathroom. "Some of us would like the hot water too, Dattebayo!"
"Fine Fine Naruto," I answered, I took my sweet slow time toweling off, "Don't get your panties in a bind."
Mendel's mother, Mrs. Jill Craven, I learned always liked to keep everything germ free and energy efficient. She had that done to the point that there was an on and off switch(1) to the hot water hidden behind the shower curtain. Should I tell him about the switch? I shook my head. I'd been gone for at least four years; the least I could do is be nice to Naruto, only a microscopic smidge worth nice at least.
"Finally," Naruto huffed, walking by in only his underpants. A good look down the hallway confirmed that Naruto stripped off absolutely everything else to get to the shower. The floor had a carpet of his clothes. At least no one was up yet to see anything, especially Clarity who always gets up at three and is wide awake by three fifteen. "Took you long enough Sasuke."
On second thought, I'll show it to Naruto the hard way. Sometimes it's the only way he learns. I flipped the switch as soon as Naruto turned on the hot water. A burst of ice hit him square in the face.
"SSAAASUKEEEEEEEE!" Naruto screamed making the walls thrum with his roar. Clarity was sipping coffee in the living room when she sprayed a bunch of the liquid back in her cup. The entire complex came alive. One neighbor shouted to keep it down while banging a broomstick on his side of the wall. A baby bawled on the other side of the building.
UWAAAAH WAAAAH
SPITTTTT
HEY YOU *thwok thwok* KEEP IT DOWN
"Yeah Naruto," I sneered in tandem to the neighbor, "Keep it down!"
"Grrrrr Sasuke when I get my hands on you!" Naruto seethed, "That's it! Eat water Bug Breath! Rasengan!"
(Mr. and Mrs. Craven's Bedroom, Third Person Point of View)
"SSAAASUKEEEEEEEE!" came the scream from down the hall.
Mrs. Jill Craven, a sweet old lady with a generously full figure frame and silvering blonde hair arose from her quaint sleep just as New York City was getting ready for the day shift. She blinked the sleep from her eyes several times before she remembered what happened day before yesterday. Mendel came jogging to the door, easy feat since they lived down the hall of their apartment complex, and asked very nicely if they could put a few people up for the night. It wasn't everyday they had guests besides the rescued individuals from a local Mutation attack that leveled buildings.
"Oh Jack, Jack honey, let's get up dear. The boys are up already, Jack . . . Oh Jack." Jill crooned. Shaking her shorter slender husband. Jack grabbed a fistful of duvet and rolled the other way.
"Darn grmm rumm morning, can't it wait till afternoon," Jack grumbled. He was never a morning person until he had his coffee. Speaking of which the energizing aroma was already lifting Jack up by his nose. If anything, Jack was one of the only few men in the world that liked milk chocolate coffee.
"Is that what I think I smell?" Jack asked wistfully.
"Oh honey, I swear Mendel doesn't get the absent mindedness from my side of the family," Jill chuckled, "You already know Clarity and her way with people. Besides, weren't you the one that said they could stay over as long as Clarity found that milk chocolate coffee you love so much."
"All right I'm up, I'm up," Jack muttered before declaring, "coffee, coffee, show me the coffee."
(Living Room, Clarity's Point of View)
I awoke to the sounds of the shower. My cell phone had three oh five displayed on its screen. Okay so, maybe that's a dry way to start the morning. Naruto was pounding on the door obviously in a rush. I took one step out the guest bedroom door when my foot caught the waistline of Naruto's pants.
"Naruto," I called to find him banging on the door with all his might, "Naruto! Get back here! Could you please pick up you're clothes. You're sixteen not four!"
"Sure I'll pick them up," answered the hyper little blonde, "As soon as Sasuke QUITS HOGGING ALL THE HOT WATER!"
I face palmed, thinking what would be worse? The wrath of a host and hostess or having Sasuke and Naruto duke it out in one on one combat. On the flipside if the two duked it out now they'd get it out of their system. On the bad side bye bye bathroom and replacing an entire room is expensive no matter where people go. Yamato put the two biggest bickerers in our group under my care. The least I could do was brave the waters as I picked up every load of laundry Naruto launched on the way to the door.
"Put this where it belongs." I commanded in the tone of voice I've heard Tsunade use many times, which is short, quick, and non negotiable, "And clean up the ninja tools before you start anything."
"But, but Clarity," Naruto whined, "Half of that is . . ."
"No buts no cuts no ramen for lunch," I snapped I shoved what stuff I had into Naruto's arms, "These are New York civilians. I'm not asking you to blend in. I'm asking you to pick up your stuff. It's a common courtesy Naruto. You just keep your area clean and be nice. That's all I'm asking you to do."
"Okay, okay, gaaah I get it. I'll pick up." Naruto quipped, puffing his whisker marked cheeks.
"Oh and please ixna on the injutsuna?" I pleaded, "I don't have the money to replace someone's entire living space and if you cause any damage. I will have to take it out of the separate budget I'm making for all the ramen I owe you."
Naruto didn't hear those last few lines as he dashed back to the room. A sigh escaped my lips at another disaster carefully avoided. In all honesty I couldn't even afford Naruto's ramen budget let alone the bill for replacing a bathroom. I was hoping that Naruto would blow the whole thing at Ichiraku ramen since according to Tsunade this is a ninja mission. I remember the payment scale from the first one. If the mission is a success it's pay day. If it's a failure than there's no dough to blow. Even my current paycheck was hanging on this simple sliding scale.
My mind was too muddled to think yet. I set a normal pot of coffee on, before I fixed up that milk chocolate coffee that cost an arm and a leg to find. I made a promise to Mr. Craven to find it and my word is my bond. I bought enough to last a month at least. I was just about to sip up some steamy caffeine goodness when . . .
"SSAAASUKEEEEEEEE!" Naruto screamed
SPITTTT
I nearly choked on my coffee. I scrambled down the hall. The whole apartment must be awake by now I'm sure. I could feel a couple chakras start to build. Two certain people were ready to tear each other apart. I bashed the door open with a well deserved kick.
AHHHH
SCRREEEEEE
Note to self: Two naked sixteen year old ninjas is way more ninja than I wanted to see thank you.
Sasuke's scream sounded so inhuman like a dinosaur's. Naruto's scream was ear-splitting as usual. Other than spilling coffee down my front. At least the bathroom is still in one piece. Sasuke had a fist inches from Naruto's ear. Naruto had another shadow clone with his hands wavering over the original's hand where a swirling ball of Giant rasengen dispersed harmlessly. I bowed out of the room slowly shutting the door.
"Did you three have a wild night last night?" asked Mrs. Craven innocently. I about jumped about out of my skin.
"Oh no, not at all just . . . Making sure the . . . Well . . . Eh-heh . . . You wouldn't happen to know where the ice is do you Mrs. Craven?" I asked nervously my face still feeling flush from bursting in on two guys in a bathroom.
"Oh please call me Jill, and oh my," Mrs. Craven chided, "Are you getting heat stroke? You've better take better care of yourself dear. This is New York City not the City of Angels."
"I'll keep that in mind Jill thank you." I whispered. My cheeks were burning red. My mind was already afloat with a must need to-do-list. First take Sasuke shopping. He already burned off all his clothes. Then we needed to meet Shikamaru and the rest of Team Kakashi back at the lab to see what's really going on within Sasuke. Of course, I also had another tutoring deal with Naruto, not chakra stuff, book stuff. Boy Naruto is going to totally hate me with some of the lessons I have planned for him.
Entertaining Footnotes: This is just a refresher or just a few clues and hints for those that may be unfamiliar with either Naruto or Godzilla: the Series. I also included a few hints on how Clarity ended becoming familiar with the Ninja World.
(1) On and Off Switch- New York City, or at least the U.S. does not have an On/Off Switch for their hot water. However you can find these switches in several shower spots around China.I got the idea off of Karate Kid and then went to do some research for realativity. Who doesn't like a twist on the old "flush the toilet, no hot water" gag?
