Chapter 12: Sunset is a Saving Grace
Flashback:
"Save it. I'm sick and tired of listening to you complain. Luna's not as bad as you make her sound like." With those final words, Lacus marched out of the cafeteria with practiced grace, everyone staring at her, just as surprised as Cagalli was.
"OMG he didn't have sex with Luna did he!?"
End Flashback:
I'm so angry right now. Part of it is at myself. But I still can't understand why Luna
I don't think it was just an innocent little accident. She was holding his jacket! I don't think Luna's the rabid fan-girl thief type either. Something was up. But now, because I decided to say what I feel, I got Lacus mad at me. I've never seen her so angry. The way she yelled at me made my
Why am I writing in this stupid notebook anyway? I don't do the girly, pour-your-soul out thing, but it feels different now. There's no one to talk to. Especially not Athrun. He probably thinks I'm just a bitch now, since Lacus probably told Kira and kira told him. There are a lot more girls that are better looking than ugly old me anyways. Why did I even think that he would like me? Even so, I can't
I feel so worthless right now. I guess some things just never change.
Cagalli ripped the tear stained page out of her notebook, and ripped it several times till she decided it would be a while before someone even thought of trying to assemble it again. She didn't even bother to throw it out. She just left it on her bed, looking out the window. Maybe she could jump from there and end it all. "No," she told herself. "I'm too much of a coward for that." Suddenly, she felt like she was being choked by the stuffy air in the room, even if the window was open. The sun was shining, the sky cloudless and blue, and warm enough to feel just a little drowsy. And here Cagalli was, weeping her poor angst-filled heart out. "How can the weather be so beautiful on a day like this?" she wondered miserably. Cagalli faintly heard the last bells of the day. She was so upset that she skipped school. And she wasn't the bad girl poser type either. She dabbed at the red circles under her eyes with a tissue, combed her hair, and threw on a pair of sweats before heading out. She walked to a secluded area where she felt she could just get away from it all. Or she thought.
After what seemed like an eternity, the final bells rang, dismissing students from their classes till the next day. Athrun swiftly packed up his books and ran out the door as fast as he could, but it wasn't fast enough.
"Athrun!" a feminine voice exclaimed girlishly. Athrun reluctantly turned to find a girl with bright bubblegum hair standing in front of him. He groaned quietly, this was not what he needed right now.
"Meer," he said, his tone flat.
She giggled and rolled her eyes at his expression. "What's got you so down huh? We should go out, do something fun!" she tugged at his arm encouragingly. Athrun shrugged her off annoyed.
"Sorry, I'm busy."
"Awwe, don't be like that Athrun!" she whined, tossing her hair in a way that was meant to be seductive, but she didn't quite pull it off as well as Stellar did. She leaned into him, so close that he could smell her perfume. Shit, she smells good, he thought privately. But he still didn't have the patience or time to even make conversation with her, which he would on any other day. He stepped back and sighed.
"Sorry Meer, another time," he apologized, his voice still monotone, and he walked off before she could get another word in edgewise.
Meer scowled angrily at his back. What did it take for this guy to see that she had what Cagalli didn't?
She had almost reached the place she was looking for. Ready to collapse again, weak and close to hysterics again, Cagalli saw something out of the corner of her eye. Cobalt blue hair. Athrun. She held her breath, wondering if she should show herself. She took a quick look around the corner of the wall. She saw him lying on the field, basking in the sunlight, his pale lavender lids closed. Her eyes widened in wonder, and her heart started pounding against her chest. He looked so innocent here, like a sleeping child, it made Cagalli want to run into his strong arms and cuddle up against him. He was so different from the Athrun she knew, the serious, but playfully intriguing one. She saw him stir, and she jumped a mile out of the air. What would she say if he saw her here? Oh hey Athrun, I was just spying on you and admiring your gorgeous bod. Now that just sounded plain ridiculous. What the hell am I doing thinking like this!? she thought. God, but he's so hot…Fuck it. I'm gonna think whatever I feel like thinking. Cagalli was too tired to block out her stalker thoughts right now. She suddenly stopped and looked down. Huh? What's tickling my arm?
On her sleeve was a fuzzy caterpillar inching slowly up her arm. Cagalli bit her lip hard to keep from screaming. She frantically waved her arms up and down, kicking and shaking her head vigorously, not realizing she was walking straight out of her hiding place.
"There," she said triumphantly, after the caterpillar had been well shaken off. "Got it." She realized that no sooner than she'd spoken, Athrun's eyes fluttered away, a grin on his face.
"So, Cagalli," he began. "What are you doing here, dare I ask?"
"Umm…" Cagalli racked her brain furiously for an answer. Shit, what do I say?! I'm such an idiot..she thought hopelessly. Tears began to fill her eyes again.
"Cagalli?" Athrun asked, now concerned. "Is something wrong?"
She hastily blinked away her tears. "No, nothing, I'm fine."
Looking at her doubtfully, Athrun didn't say anymore and let it pass. "You still didn't answer my first question. What are you doing here?"
"I was…" she sighed. "I really don't know."
To her surprised, Athrun chuckled. He sat up, and looked straight in her eyes.
"What are you doing here, Athrun?" Cagalli asked, avoiding his gaze, surely he could hear her heart by now.
"Well…this is the place I like to go to get away from everything," he explained, shrugging his shoulders. Cagalli looked up at that.
"Get away from what?" she asked.
He shrugged again. "Stuff. It's complicated."
Cagalli didn't say anything more, figuring that he didn't want to talk about it. They stood there in an awkward silence, Cagalli shuffling her feet, Athrun gazing in the direction of the already setting sun.
"Me, Shinn and Kira are in a big fight."
Cagalli was surprised. She heard that these guys were easygoing and never got in fights, especially Kira.
She said tentatively. "Are you guys not friends anymore?"
He shrugged indifferently, almost tensing. Cagalli could almost see the dark aura emitting off of him.
Once again the two were caught in the unsettling silence. Cagalli didn't know what to say to that. The tension between both of them was getting unbearable, weighing down on Cagalli hard. She was seriously contemplating if she should make a run for it right now, before things got worse.
As if reading her thoughts, Athrun let his shoulders drop and relax as quickly as he had tightened them, making Cagalli wonder if she had really seen anything at all.
"Athrun?" she asked tentatively.
He turned his eyes back to her. They were no longer sharp. Warm, almost.
"Sorry," he apologized.
Cagalli snorted at this remark. "What for? You didn't do anything wrong," she said, grinning. She could see his lips tugging upwards too, ever so slightly. Emboldened, she sat next to him on the grass, gazing up at the horizon, the sun dipped low, setting fire to the clouds above it. Athrun was taken by surprise at her sudden actions. He felt his face heat up, and a sudden urge to reach out and grab her hand. He fought it.
"I like the sunset," she mumbled, more to herself than him.
Athrun nodded. "Me too."
"It's almost like it's all you can see, you don't need to worry about anything else."
Athrun slowly edged his hand closer to Cagalli's.
"Yeah," he agreed absent-mindedly. Their fingertips were almost touching now.
"What are you looking at?" she asked, glancing in his direction. He tried to pull his hand away before she could see, but it was too late. She swallowed, and looked at him, an incomprehensible expression in her eyes. This was happening too fast. She stood up, her arms folded over her chest, it almost looked like she was hugging herself.
"I better go," she said, and turned the opposite direction of him and walked away as fast as she could.
"Cagalli, wait I'm sorry!" he called after her, but she didn't hesitate.
Lacus, stumbled into her dorm at 5:23 p.m, late from her student council meeting, and was very surprised at the sight in front of her. Her eyes bulged out of their sockets wide as she saw Dearka and Miriallia lying on her bed, and from what she could tell, either of them weren't wearing any clothes. They would probably be just as surprised if they weren't asleep.
A/N: Okay, I bet your all thinking, why the hell is Cagalli threatening to commit suicide because of a stupid little fight? We teenagers tend to take things over the top, and she's just being overly dramatic about it. Depression is half the reason for teen sucicide, so hopefully that clears things up. AHA! I bet you thought I forgot about Meer, Stellar and Fllay didn't you? Well, the truth is, I did for a minute, but the next chapter is going to be all about them! So prepare yourself ;)
