Hey, guess what? IM ALIVE! Yaya ;D Haha! Though, I did have a panic attack and screamed at the flight attendants to let me off the plane, I still survived :D It was a fun holiday, actually. The weather was too hot for me. In the mid forty's, so it was. Okay, Im babbling now... Oh, and for those of you who asked, Bella has gotton the shot only a few days before leaving for Ireland, and she knows how long these things last. Also, sorry for the crappy, tinchy lemon. That chappy was rushed. I'll make up for it, I swear ;)
Disclaimer: All the Twilight shizz belongs to Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended-obviously.
*EPOV*
It had been exactly two days since I last saw Bella come.
Watching Bella come was fucking fantastic.
The way she called out my name, over and over again. How she tensed and shook around me. I couldn't help but smirk, because it was me who made her feel like this. I made her react like this. I made her scream my name.
Yeah. Smirking was good. I just wish I had gotton it on record. So I could watch it all happen again. Though, I wouldn't mind doing it again. Again and again...
"Edward?"
Bella's voice pulled me from the memories; Bella and all her glory...
And I was brought back to the present.
Bella was laying next to me. Her head lay against the nook of my shoulder, her hands wrapped around my waist. God, she was beautiful.
It was weird how every time I looked at her, I was stunned into silence by her beauty. She had such a hold on me...
"Why are you smiling? Or smirking, should I say", Bella questioned, sitting up to get a better look at me.
I was smiling? Well, memories like that would have you smiling...
"Nothing, I was just thinking of you", I assured her, trying to contain my growing smile.
"I hope it was something good", Bella warned, her eyebrows pulling together.
I laughed once.
"Yes, Bella, it was good thoughts. You enjoyed them alot, too" -
"Edward!" Bella groaned, hitting me in the arm, trying to pull away from me, but I just pulled her back. I knew she was giggling by the movements her body made.
Fuck, I was hard again...
"Relax, I'm only buzzing off you"- I tried to say but my lips were suddenly very busy.
Bella was on top of me, straddling my hips, moving her lips against mine, urgently. We stayed like that. Not moving, barely breathing. We just lay there and kissed.
Fucking hell, I loved -
No! Do not say the 'L' word, Edward!
I screamed mentally at myself.
I couldn't say the 'L' word. It didn't fit the situation. I barely knew Bella. She barely knew me. End of story.
Its never too late to learn...
I sighed against Bella's lips, pulling away from her, gasping for air. I honestly dont know how I managed to sigh with lack of oxygen. Shit, this woman was going to be the death of me, I swear.
When I pulled away, dragging Bella off me and standing up quickly, I heard Bella copy my movements.
"Edward, whats wrong?" She called after me, as I left the hut and went to rebuild the fire, looking for something to do, wanting to clear my head.
We needed more wood for this fire.
I didn't answer Bella, though. And I should have known I would have pissed her off further.
"Edward, answer me, God damn it!" she yelled at me, still standing at the entrance of the hut. But I didn't answer.
"Fine! What the fuck ever, Edward!" Bella moaned, and I didn't hear her voice again.
When the fire was built, I sat down next to it and buried my head in my hands.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I obviously didn't... love Bella. I didn't feel that strongly at all. I know I didn't!
She got on my nerves every fucking minute of the day, though I wouldn't have it any other way. She would make up for it, either with a kiss or with the soft touches of her hands on my body. Fuck, maybe she would even give me a hand job in return for what I gave her. Jesus, imagine if she did...
Focus, Edward!
I shook my head, trying to clear it and returned my thoughts to Bella. I was pretty sure I pissed Bella off aswell. I was grouchy most of the time; mostly complaining about the lack of variety of food we had on the island, but still! I made up for it, too, though. I'm not even going to think of the ways in which I do, because that wouldn't be great for the whole, 'clearing my head' process.
I shook my head again and thought through my options:
I could fuck Bella. Easy, fun, no srtings attatched. We could act like a couple here until we ever - If we ever got off the island. Then, I would say my goodbyes and head for Ireland like I had planned to do from the start.
But I couldn't bring myself to do so. I couldn't leave Bella like that. Not after everything that has happend with us both. She lost her best friend. She was supposed to go travelling Europe. Did she even have a home to return to?
I groaned, kicking the sand, but it did jack shit for my frustration.
It was times like these when I just wanted a fucking cigarette. I didn't smoke, though. Only the occasional times, when I was pissed off or angry; times like these.
What the fuck was I supposed to do now?
I took my head from my hands and stood, looking across the clear blue water, squinting against the sunlight.
Was Bella still angry with me?
"Edward?"
I swung around, acting on instict, as I didn't hear anyone approach until I heard that voice. I should have fucking known who it was.
My hand swung around, until it hit something warm, squishy, but still hard.
And then I realised two things:
One, it was flesh. A cheek?
Two, it was Bella.
I heard a cry escape her lips.
"FUCK!"
Bella fell to the sandy ground, holding her hand against her face. Yes, cheek it was.
"Bella, are you? - Im so sorry!" -
I crouched down, trying to pull her nearer, looking at her cheek, until she pushed my away.
"Dont fucking touch me, Edward Cullen!" she blubbered, her voice muffled as she could barely speak.
Fuck, was her lip bleeding too?
"Bella, I" -
"DONT!"
And she was gone. Running back towards the hut, grabbing a piece of clothing, and running off into the jungle; heading towards the waterfall, I guessed.
I wanted to fun after her, but I couldn't get my legs to move.
I hit her. Bella. My Bella. I hit my Bella.
Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck...
I sure wasn't going to be forgiven this time.
Edward you dunce! Ugh, sorry about that people. He just never learns, does he? Well, no lemons in this chappy, sorry about that. But Im literally dead writing this. Sleep deprived, what? :( haha. Im going to start with the whole 'every second day update' thing now, since everything is starting back up again. School and what do you have it. I'm gonna go unpack now, since I've been putting it off since I hit the Irish shores... Adios, until two days :)*Kisses*, Meg, ϟ
