A/N: Four reviews for one chapter?! I LOVE YOU GUYS. YOU'RE ALL FREAKING AMAZING. I'm so glad you guys liked the Aiko Twist, I got the idea from a deviantart commission of Maya (links on my profile). Jesus, 'Aiko Twist' sounds like a freaking dance move.
Anyway. Thank you everyone for all the follows, favourites and reviews! Its what motivates me best~! Now on to the story!
Summary: Vampires are real. I attend Cross Academy, a school where the student body is populated by the human Day Class, and the vampire Night Class. This was all supposed to be fiction. A story I read for entertainment. But it's real. It's all real. SI, OC Insert.
Disclaimer: Everything to do with Vampire Knight belongs to Matsuri Hino. I only own my OCs; Maya, Katsumi and Aiko.
WARNING: this fanfic contains dark themes; mentions of death, serious injury, murder and suicide.
Chapter 12 - Memories of the Past
I woke in a cold sweat, heart hammering away, breathing heavy and eyes wide in fear of... something.
What the fuck was that?
I- wait, why can't I-? I can't remember?
Frowning, I fixed my glasses and looked around Maria's room with narrowed eyes, searching.
But other then Maria and I, it was empty.
Cross must've left after I drifted off... I clutched the fabric of the blanket he must've draped over me, subconsciously pulling it closer.
There was something... lingering in the air.
It made me feel uneasy.
Like something was wrong.
A strangely familiar heady fragrance drifted through the air, fading even as I tried to identify it.
It almost smells like- blanket falling to ground, I leapt to my feet, eyes darting over to the bedside table, heart pounding again.
A tall shapely glass vase that I didn't see before sat there, filled with a simple bouquet of pink six-point star lilies.
Suddenly the world spun, my feet staying rooted to the spot, and then I wasn't in Maria's room anymore.
I was back there.
The room was decorated with dark wood ornate antique furniture; a tall wardrobe by the door, a large four poster canopy bed framed by two large arching windows that reached for the tall ceiling that accompanied old houses, and a vanity sitting by one of the windows.
The view from the windows was of the familiar barren forest, blanketed in thick snow.
Except this time, it wasn't just because of the dream I'd apparently fallen into - those windows, this place, is where that view came from.
The fragrance of her favourite flower - 'Le Reve' french for 'the dream' - had brought me back 'here.
And I had no doubt she'd done it intentionally.
This was 'my room' when I stayed at Aiko's house- well house is a bit too generic a description, it was more a mansion than anything else.
She had her maid keep at least one vase of the flowers in every room, and she spent hours taking care of a garden full of them, among other things, in an atrium accessible only through the kitchen.
Consequently the intense scent of the hybrid Oriental Lily had become a trigger of sorts for memories of that place - especially since I'd only ever seen or smelt them there.
Oddly enough, I think the artificially crossbred flower, while quite popular and common in my world, was relatively rare here.
All that aside, this was the absolute last place I wanted to be.
Because this was where everything started.
Me becoming Mastumoto Maya, the dreams - everything began right here.
The door opened and I turned to see a nervous teenage girl with a short brown bob hairstyle, wearing an ankle length black maid uniform and a long white apron, walking through the door, pushing a rattling food trolley.
Maya.
The real Maya.
She passed by me, as I was standing in the center of the room, and moved towards the bed.
"Good evening, Ojou-sama" she began, a shaky smile on her face.
"You really don't have to call me that, you know" came a muffled voice from the curled up lump on the bed.
"Bu- but Aiko-sama-" she began.
An annoyed groan came from beneath the sheets, interrupting her, before a familiar mop of long brown hair dragged itself out.
"'But Aiko-'sama' nothing" past me repeated, with a disgruntled 'I'm still half asleep' expression "isn't here right now, is she?" she sat up, rubbing her eyes, before gesturing for the girl to take a seat on the bed with her "now come on, you probably haven't eaten again today, right? So let's eat"
Maya always protested, trying futilely to remind me of some 'master-servant' bullshit I didn't care about. Aiko's personal butler and maid - who were both total tools by the way - disapproved of the way I interacted with Maya, treating her more like a friend then a servant.
But that was Aiko's goal.
I just wanted someone sane - human - to keep me grounded so I could really process where I was and what was happening.
While the sky was heavily clouded with grey, a small clock on the bedside table by the vase of flowers indicated the sun was almost finished setting - so while it was a little early for Aiko, she was probably already awake, reading in the library if not in the atrium where she spent most of her time.
As the two ate and talked, I remembered this was during the first month after I got there, and Maya had only been around for a few weeks, having being 'hired' by Aiko specifically to take care of me.
Aiko said it would be 'beneficial' for me to have another human around, then the next day the girl's butler suddenly showed up with Maya.
Poor girl was scared out of her mind, having most likely been kidnapped by the vampire, but despite this she did her best to carry out her required duties for reasons I didn't understand at the time.
She was very likable.
That's why she chose her.
She was a kind and timid girl.
To get to me.
Then the door opened again.
Immediately my vision went dark.
Nothing.
I couldn't see anything.
I couldn't hear anything.
Just screaming.
The thick smell of iron.
The feeling of something wet splattering over me.
And a feeling of raw unbridled horror.
"-aya? Maya? Maya!"
The darkness dissipated as I regained consciousness and I blinked my eyelids open, looking up past the face swimming in my vision towards the ceiling, before my eyes focused and I realized I was on the floor with tears streaming from my eyes.
Chairman Cross was standing over me with a serious frown on his face.
Well... shit.
That's never fucking happened before!
That- that bitch!
I dragged myself to my feet, gritting my teeth in anger as I lunged for the vase, throwing it through the window and shattering the glass, then I ran from the room, just trying to get away from the smell.
That fucking bitch!
I burst out the front doors, only stopping on the front steps because a wave of dizziness forced me to.
I gagged, the acidic burning feeling of bile shooting up my throat.
Thankfully, with a few gulps of fresh air, I managed to force it back down before Cross found me.
Sitting down on the steps, I pulled my legs closer and hugged them, resting my forehead on my arms crossed over my knees.
We all have memories we want to forget, it just so happens a lot of mine happened in that fucking room.
I mean, sure there's a lot of others I wish didn't happen, but not as badly as those ones.
"How long?"
My body jerked in surprise, head twisting around to see Cross standing there, still with that same damn concerned expression - except now it was mixed with some kind of grim... understanding?
He knows.
Well, he knows something.
But what?
"How long, what?" I asked quietly, voice cracking from the lingering taste of bile, and my eyes trained back on the laces of my black boots.
I actually felt his stern gaze lock on to me, and an involuntary shiver ran up my spine.
I swallowed nervously.
Right. Okay. You can do this. Breathe in.
Then reluctantly breathe out "... about a year" in a small voice.
Kaien let out a loud sigh "well that explains your disturbed sleeping patterns, in any case"
Frowning, I turned to see the blonde man sitting down on the steps beside me.
"Yuuki told me" he replied to my unspoken question.
Ah. She would.
Its actually quite weird for me - to know someone is actually paying that much attention to me, I mean.
I'll take it if I have to, but generally I don't like any kind of spotlight, big or small.
When I was younger, I used to get really nervous whenever someone looked directly at me when they talked to me, like they expected me to respond with an answer straight away or something. I just got really uncomfortable with people asking me questions - sometimes I still do.
You see, my brain tries to think of all these variables at once; like do I look stupid, does what I think sound stupid, will I make an idiot out of myself, do I actually trust this person enough to tell them my real opinion, etc. Sometimes it gets so wound up it takes logic to kick my arse into gear to actually think of a response.
While I was thinking, my fingers that were wrapped around my forearms, tightened, the skin going white from the pressure.
... should I tell him?
Considering what he's already figured out, it could just be a matter of time. But if I just tell him what I've been dreaming about... it could open up a reason to explain what I remember of the storyline, and how I know so much about vampires. I've been lucky as all hell he hasn't asked how I know already.
But is it worth the risk?
He might think I'm crazy!
Aaaaand irrationality makes a reappearance - haven't heard from it in a long time, and usually that would be a good point... if this wasn't a world where vampires and supernatural powers actually exist.
Also, it is Kaien Cross.
So. To risk, or not to risk... oh, who the hell am I kidding? My whole life is one fucking risk after another.
Time to throw caution to the wind and make a snap bloody decision for once, logic.
I took the plunge into unknown waters.
"I dream about death, mostly" I kept my eyes locked on my boots as I spoke, so afraid of what he would think.
After all, telling him this could- no, will change the way he thinks of me.
"Memories of things long past - not mine, mostly. They belong to others, people I've physically touched. All it takes is a brush of the skin... but I don't just see it, I feel it" tears pooled in my eyes as I remembered, the lingering feelings of past dreams resurfacing.
"The fear. Pain. Loss. I relive the memory like its mine. Like its happening to me, right at that moment"
I felt my lungs constrict as the fear from the memories starting building up, but I continued, desperate now to just... get it out, ignoring the alarming way my eyesight blurred with tears.
"I saw Yuuki, as a little girl, running through the snow at night, her fear overwhelming. Those fallen vampires in town, I saw and felt their murders and the murders they committed. And Zero- Zero- I- I saw-"
A hand landed on my shoulder and I flinched violently, but Kaien wrapped his arms around me all the same, pulling me closer to him in a hug.
I stiffened for a few seconds, muscles freezing up and clearly uncomfortable, but he just wouldn't let 'go.
So... so I let him.
I let him hold me and I cried. Cried like I hadn't since I was a little kid.
It was just so painful, I couldn't stop the tears.
I could feel it all again.
Less so than last time, as Kaien's touch kept me grounded in the present, but it was all just... brimming beneath the surface - the tears being what spilled over.
I hate this.
Why can't they just stop?
Cross had to practically order me to go back to my dorm room and get some sleep - and this time I had to use those stupid sleeping pills Katsumi gave me. But he said it would give me a dreamless sleep - something I was dearly craving at the moment.
I dumped my blazer on the bed, closed my door and turned away, moving towards a tall free standing mirror I'd found while shopping in town.
My uniform was ruffled and creased, and my eyes were red from all the crying, though it was fading quickly now. I looked tired. The dark rings under my eyes were still there, and when I saw my hair bun was all skewed, I took it out, letting the ends fall past my shoulders and grabbed my brush to get out the knots.
I tied it back up in a low ponytail, my chin length bangs still falling freely, then I moved to change into some comfy clothes so I could take the stupid meds and then crash out, but I stopped when I heard knocking at my door.
Weird. It's like way past midnight, who the hell would be up right now?
Frowning, I went to open it, only to find the absolute last person I was expecting.
"... Kuran-senpai?" I asked, eyes wide in surprise. What the hell is he doing here?
"Come with me" he said, staring down at me "and bring it with you - I'll take you to Zero"
Wha- what?
How does he-? He knows I've got Shizuka's blood?!
... the Ancestress.
'Go' the voice - who I was sure now is the Ancestress aka the Hooded Woman - whispered in a commanding tone I hadn't heard from her before.
Just the sound of her voice, ordering me, made me feel a strong urge to do as she said.
It was disturbing.
And terrifyingly similar to a pureblood's power over lesser vampires.
But let's not go down that fucked up thought spiral right now, shall we?
"I'll be out in a minute" I found myself saying, then closed the door and hurried over to my wardrobe, retrieving an icebox from a small antique suitcase in the back.
I opened it, cold air drifting up over the edge and spilling out onto the floor in a small fog before dissipating.
In the center of the box sat the vial, wrapped in a cloth and nestled in a sea of ice to keep it fresh.
The only vial of Shizuka's blood - the last remnant of her pureblood body.
This was powerful stuff right here.
After a moment's hesitation, I bit my lip nervously and slipped it into my shorts pocket under my skirt for safe keeping, retrieved my blazer and slipped it back on, taking the moment to breathe so I could calm my nerves, and then I opened the door.
Kuran was waiting there in the moonlit hallway, and barely spared me glance as I closed my dorm room door, before stalking off down the hallway with me hurrying after him.
It didn't take Kuran long to find where Kaien and Yagari were keeping Zero - though he probably already knew, knowing him - and then the bastard told me to wait outside and fucking disappeared.
A loud crash echoed off from somewhere close by, and I had to hide as Yagari and Kaien rushed out to investigate the sound.
I quickly moved inside, hurrying down the steps and opening the screeching metal door.
My fingers slipped from the door and it slammed closed behind me at the sight that reached my eyes when I looked up.
It made my lungs constrict and tears pool in my eyes - whether out of fear, pity or grief, I don't know. Probably a mix of all of the above, knowing me.
Zero was chained to the wall by both wrists and a large glowing symbol that matched the sealing tattoo on his neck - which was also glowing - was painted on the wall and part of the floor behind him.
He was in pain, eyes glowing red and face contorted in agony as he tried to fight it.
Struggling against the madness inside him.
Kuran was talking to him, but the moment the door slammed shut and he caught a whiff of my scent, Zero's red eyes locked onto me, and he pulled on the chains that restrained him, his expression holding the same terror as when he saw me on that staircase - but I could see the raw animalistic need he was failing to suppress leaking out through his body's movements.
My body's fight or flight instinct was screaming at me to run. To get the fuck out of there.
'Stay'
Hearing her voice made me freeze.
I couldn't turn away. I- I couldn't- what the hell is She doing to me?!
'Move towards him'
Left with no other choice, heart hammering away and tears gathering in my eyes, I moved towards Zero.
"Stay back!" he yelled, his voice cracking "... please"
A tear fell, trailing down the left side of my face "I can't" I replied, while sounding far more confident than I felt, it also came across as almost... distant.
Like I didn't care.
But I did-! I do care!
That's why I'm here, damn it!
Not because she ordered me to!
He collapsed to his knees as I moved closer, ignoring his continued protests - and all the while I could feel Kuran just watching me.
I crouched down on one knee, just shy of the reach of the chains, and stared at him.
He... he looked like he was about to cry.
But- but this is Zero.
My right hand drew the vial from my pocket in a movement my brain didn't even process, until I saw my left hand reaching out and grabbing a hold of the top of his head.
My fingers shifted through strands of his soft silver hair for a moment, until I got a good grip to stop the motion of his head.
"Please... Maya, just go" he hissed, vampiric instincts making his sharp fangs still bite out, even as he warned me away.
A warning I physically couldn't heed.
"Ne, Zero..." I trailed off, voice wavering with false levity "remember when you saved my life?" the corner of my mouth curled up in a half smile, and I held up the vial for him to see "this is me... trying to repay the favour"
I'd decided the moment Kuran turned up in my doorway that sneaking around wasn't the way to go about this.
My kind of subtlety wasn't exactly likely to get past Zero anyway, and even if I did somehow manage to do it and he found out? Well... it'd be the second unforgivable thing I'd forced on him.
And if I were him... I would have struggled with forgiveness the first time, let alone a second time.
So straight up. It was the best way to do it.
This way, even if he hated me for it afterwards, at least I wouldn't be walking around on eggshells all the time, worrying if he'd figured out what I'd done to him yet.
No. This way, I would know straight away.
"It's okay" I continued as I removed the lid, trying and failing to smile reassuringly as I moved forward to poor it down his open mouth "you just have to-"
Too close.
He'd slammed himself back against the wall away from me, the second the scent of Shizuka's blood began coming from the open vial, forcing me to move within the limit of the chains.
That's where I fucked up.
Again.
I wasn't strong enough to hold him still, and he was fast, his already fast hunter reflexes multiplied by the vampiric abilities.
He slapped the vial from my hand with bruising force and Kuran was the only thing that stopped Zero when he lunged forward to rip open my throat.
But my eyes were only on the vial.
"No..." no no no no 'no! Eyes wide in shock, I scrambled away from the two and ran to the far wall.
"Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck! No, this can't be happening!" I hissed to myself.
But it was.
And it had.
The vial was shattered, pieces scattered on the floor, and Shizuka's blood was splattered on the wall, dripping down towards the floor.
Thoughtlessly my fist slammed into the wall.
Then again, and again, and again.
I just couldn't stop.
I kept going even as my blood began leaking out to join the pureblood's, I ignoring Zero's increased struggling from behind me and just sank to the floor.
This wasn't how this was supposed to go!
'This has gone on long enough, child'
I froze.
Shit! The vampire blood!
Oh fuck.
She was there. In the room. Right fucking behind me.
Fuck.
No. Not now!
'I help you through your fear, and yet you still fail?'
I couldn't speak. I couldn't respond.
I turned my head.
Kuran was staring at her.
He could see her!
Just like with Shizuka... maybe all purebloods could see her through this thing- this ability I have?
So what does that make me? A conduit? A relay?
My thoughts lingered on the way she could... order me around. Take control even, like that day in town with the Level E.
Realization hit me and my eyes widened, a cold chill of fear running through me.
So I'm... I'm like a... a puppet?
The Hooded Woman's cold silver eyes stared down at me, filled with disappointment.
'So you finally realize your purpose, child...' that same cold smirk she twisted my face with, curling her own mouth 'it took you longer than I thought'
Then she disappeared in a flurry of snow and I was left to stare at my bloodied hands with disbelieving eyes.
Suddenly the scent of Kuran's blood reached me and I spun around fully to see the pureblood had turned away from me and was offering it to Zero.
Just like before.
Just like it was going be.
I couldn't fix it.
It couldn't do anything.
It's not fair.
It's not fucking fair.
"Ku- Kuran-senpai, I- I can still-" I started, looking around helplessly for some way to recover the blood "you- you don't have to-" I stopped as the pureblood's fierce gaze landed on me.
"It's useless now. Your blood has contaminated most of it and what remains isn't enough to hold off his darkness"
At his words of finality, my body slumped back against the wall behind me.
I... I really fucked up.
I'm so fucking useless.
I couldn't even- for fuck's sake, I couldn't even do this.
"Inside my body is the blood of a pureblood. It will let you live. It will take away your madness"
I brought my legs up again, hiding my face in shame behind my knees.
"This is not for you!" Kuran hissed "... it's for Yuuki" there was a pause, and then "do it already"
I closed my eyelids tightly, hands futily trying to block out the noises and the overwhelming smell of blood.
No.
It isn't fucking fair.
... I just wanted to help.
But I couldn't even fucking do that.
Chapter End
A/N: Another chapter for you lovely readers!
Please remember to follow/favourite and/or review!
~I'll also show you a sweet dream next night~
Thanks for reading!
~Milley02~
