Kaylee and Simon walked through a corridor on the way from the cargo bay, on opposite sides. Kaylee was laughing and Simon was trying to pretend to look offended.

"Come on, admit it, it's true," Kaylee teased, poking Simon slightly.

"No, I won't, because it's not. I use swear words like anybody else," Simon urged, holding the spot on his side where Kaylee poked.

Kaylee looked at him in disbelief. "Oh, really? See, I never heard you. So when is it you do all of this cussin'? After I go to bed, or..."

"I swear when it's appropriate," Simon assured. Kaylee pushed him playfully on the shoulder as they walked.

"Simon, the whole point of swearing is that it ain't appropriate," she said, half smiling.

"I think anytime is an appropriate time to curse," Evie said, running up into the conversation she'd eavesdropped on.

"We know, you little hun dan," Kaylee said as she wrapped an arm around her and bopped her on the nose. "Not that you should be doin' it none at your age."

Evie stopped and stomped petulantly. "Why does everyone always think I'm too little to do anything," she whined.

"Because you are," Simon teased. Evie stuck her tongue out at him. He grinned at her but a crash in the distance caught his attention. Suddenly, he was running toward the infirmary and the girls followed right behind him.

As they entered the med bay they saw that Jayne had torn it apart. It looked like a tornado had gone through it with gauze pads and other medical supplies strewn about the room. After they took in the mess they looked at the giant man. He was using medical tape to strap a gun around his midriff.

Simon put a hand to his forehead and stared about the room in shock, exclaiming. Kaylee regarded from the door and put a hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him.

"Now, this would be the perfect time for a swear word," she mused, trying to add a little levity to the situation.

"What...happened in here?" Simon asked, shocked, not taking in her comment.

Jayne didn't even bother to look up as he continued to wrap the tape around his abdomen. 'Needed to find some tape," was all he said.

Simon was aghast. "So you had to tear my infirmary apart?!" he asked.

Jayne shrugged. "Apparently."

Simon blinked at him and hesitated for a minute. Then, " My god - you're like a trained ape..."

"Without the training," Evie quickly added, grinning from ear to ear. Jayne ignored Simon but reached his big arm out to knock Evie in the back of the head lightly.

"Hey!" she protested.

Mal entered then, hearing the ruckus. He saw the gun that Jayne was strapping to his belly and crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow at the big mercenary. "Jayne. I told you we're setting down at the Canton factory settlement on Higgins' moon."

Jayne barely looked up. "Yep. That you did."

"Canton don't allow guns in their town..." Mal said, regarding the giant man as he pulled Evie to him.

"Yes sir. That's why I ain't strapping one to my hip," Jayne answered. Evie looked back and forth between the two men, thinking it wise to stay quiet while they had this exchange, especially after she felt Mal's body go rigid.

"No. That's why you ain't strapping one anywhere," he said firmly. Finally Jayne stopped and met Mal's stern glare.

"Ok, listen, Mal," Jayne began, pleading slightly. "I was in Canton a few years back, I might have made me a few enemies thereabouts."

Simon finally joined the conversation, quipping, "Enemies? You? No, how can it be?"

Jayne shot him a look before turning back to Mal, "I just don't like the idea of us going in there empty-handed is all."

"Why are you still arguing what's been decided?" Mal asked dismissively, turning to walk out.

Finally Evie spoke up before he walked away. "Mal, can I-"

"No," he said, without even turning around. Evie grabbed his shirt sleeve, halting him.

"But my legs are gonna atrophy if I don't get off this ship and get my exercise. I could grow up all disfigured or some such," she tried to reason, but it came out more of a whimper.

He turned and pinned her with one of his steely looks. "What did I just say to Jayne?"

"But even Simon gets to..." she continued to protest.

"I got no notion to argue this further," he said, taking another step toward her so that he was looming over her. She looked down and sulked. "You set one foot where y'ain't supposed to and you WILL regret it." She hugged her arms around her body and huffed. "Dong ma?" he asked, lifting her chin so that she would look at him.

"Yes Sir," she said, resigned.

"Good, why don't you and the Preacher man work on your studies some, then?" he said, turning to leave again.

She sassed him behind his back and earned a disapproving look from Kaylee.

They turned as Jayne muttered a few curses at Mal's disappearing form. He ripped the tape from his belly and then half a beat later, whimpered pathetically as the pain hit him.


Wash guided Serenity to land on Higgins' moon after Inara disengaged her shuttle, off to meet with an assignation. Everyone started to exit.

"Canton really...stinks," Simon said, putting a hand up to cover his nose.

"That's what makes it such a great drop point. No one comes here that doesn't have to," Mal said, putting his hands to his hips and regarding the scenery.

"I think I changed my mind on wanting off the ship for this particular gig," said Evie, plugging her nose. Book came a put a hand on her shoulder.

"Then maybe we should get to those Mathematics problems you've been shirking," he said with a chuckle.

"Aw man!" she complained and then met Mal's eyes. He nodded at her to get going and she turned and walked back on Serenity with a huff.

"I vote we do this job really, really fast," Wash said, cradling his nose in his arm.

Mal began discussing the job and told Zoe to hold down the fort. Wash complained, "Don't I usually stay with the ship?"

"I outrank you," Zoe laughed and kissed him. "Have fun."

"So, this is a place where they...they make mud," mused Simon. Kaylee corrected him that it was clay, actually, and that it's in quite a few things. That Serenity even had a few ceramic parts in her. Simon was a little surprised. Then he turned and asked, "What is my role in this, exactly?"

"The management here don't take kindly to sight-seers, which is why we're..." Mal began, then paused as Jayne came out fully in disguise, hood, goggles, his entire body covered up. He continued, looking at the big mercenary questioningly, "...posing as buyers." Then he turned to look at Simon, "There ain't a one of us looks the part more than the good Doctor. I mean, the pretty fits, soft hands, definitely a moneyed individual. All rich and lily-white, pasty all over..."

Simon put up a hand to quiet him. "All right. Fine... Just stop describing me."

Mal flashed him a smile then saluted him. "You're the boss, boss."

Jayne looked from the too men disbelievingly. "He's the boss now?" he asked, then mumbled, "Day keeps getting better and better."


They talked to the foreman and Simon narrowly posed as a buyer, faltering his words. Wash whispered to Kaylee, "What happened to Simon? Who is this diabolical master of disguise?" Kaylee laughed and hit him playfully, defending the doctor. Mal interrupted Simon before he could stumble over his own words any more, suggesting that they wander a bit and take a look at the operation. Simon hesitantly agreed.

"Fair enough. Come and see me when you're through," the foreman said before wandering off to chastise one of the workers.

Once the foreman was out of earshot Mal said, "All right, let's head to worker-town. Find our man Kessler, get this job done."

"Boy's going to get us killed," whispered Jayne viciously as they headed off. "Let's just do this deal and get."

Mal looked at him and quirked a half smile. "His disguise ain't half as funny as yours. Who're you supposed to be, anyway?"

"You haven't been here in years, Jayne. You really think you need that getup? No one's going to remember you," Wash reasoned as they walked.

Mal paused, holding up the crew with a hand. "I think it's possible they might."

Everyone stopped and looked up at what Mal was staring at: a giant ceramic statue of Jayne with a plaque that said "Legend: JAYNE COBB" underneath it. Everyone stopped, taking this all in.

Finally Simon spoke. "Son of a bitch," was all he said.