To be honest, I don't really have an author's note this chapter. So…just enjoy it and make sure to tell me what you think at the end and then pop over to my profile to vote on my poll if you haven't already. If I had said that aloud, I probably would've ran out of breath.
I remade the cover for this story again, and I have to say I'm loving this new one! I had to cut Stef out :( but it looks good, right?
Sorry for this long-ass chapter. Please tolerate my crappy writing.
Oh, there won't be a lot of updates this weekend. For one, I'm going to update everything else before I update this story again and for two, I'm going clothes shopping with NicoleSalvatore1918 this weekend, so even if I could update, it probably wasn't going to be this story since I literally have to sit down and spend two, three, four, or more hours re-writing the episode.
So, yeah. No more updates for the weekend. Really, really, really long-ass chapter to help keep you going. Five reviews please? No pressure, promise.
Enjoy... :)
Disclaimer: Refer to The Return.
The Descent
Damon leaned against the door of Rachel's room as she eyed the drink cup in her hand. It was a glass of bourbon whiskey, courtesy of Damon's stash, but it had an extra kick in it – vervain. Elena had brought it to her before going off to Stefan's room to…well; she didn't exactly want to know, to be quite honest. With puckered lips, she moved the drink in an airborne circle, contemplating.
Slowly, she sighed. "It'll just make me weaker," Rachel admitted, obviously talking to Damon.
He raised his eyebrows. "But it'll protect you from compulsion against these Originals." Damon had already taken his share in the morning. It hurt like hell, but it was ultimately worth it in the end.
Rachel twitched her lips back and forth. "And if I don't want to be protected from compulsion?"
Damon rolled his eyes. "Don't be stupid, Rachel." He put his hands in his pockets, his frame still pressed against the door. "Elijah or Klaus can compel you to do whatever you want if you're not on vervain."
Rachel nodded. "Yeah," she agreed. "Or, they can't compel me to remember what Klaus told me to forget."
Damon frowned at her. "You honestly believe Elijah's telling the truth?"
Rachel shrugged. "What if he is?"
"What if he isn't?"
"Do you always have to think the worst of people?"
"It's part of my judgment of character," Damon quipped. "Come on," he said after a moment. "Drink the vervain, Rach." She hesitated, swishing the bourbon whiskey around in the cup. "After that, we'll get you a nice blood bag and you'll be as good as new." He cocked a smile at her and she glanced up at him.
"What's your sudden obsession with making sure I feed?"
Damon feigned a concerned look. "I'm worried about you, sweetie," he said in a higher-pitched voice. She rolled her eyes at him. "Seriously, though, you should feed. I seem to recall the blood bottle that I gave you almost full when you returned last night."
Rachel played with the cup and lowered her eyes. "I thought you were too busy to even notice," Rachel confessed.
He glared at her and crossed his arms. "Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"Don't go playing that jealous card with me," he told her firmly. "You have no right, considering how you've made it clear that you don't care for me."
Rachel gave a bitter laugh. "I'm not jealous," she denied and shot him a menacing look. "That's just your big ego telling you what you want to hear."
Damon looked at the glass in her hand. "Then drink the vervain and go get something to eat with me downstairs," he challenged. Rachel glared at him.
"I don't have to listen to you." She slammed the bourbon glass down on the table next to her and stood up, but Damon flitted over to her and stood in front of her, blocking her way.
"Yes, you do."
"No, I don't."
"Yes," Damon said slowly. "You do."
"No," she said through her teeth. "I don't." Rachel threw her hands up. "Since when did you decide to care about when, where, and how I feed anyway?"
Stefan cleared his throat. "I…guess that'd be my fault," Stefan admitted at the door. Rachel and Damon turned to him, and Rachel opened her mouth.
"Wait." She held up her hands. "You told him?"
"I did," Stefan confessed. "I was stuck in the tomb and I needed you to get stronger."
"You were in the tomb for, like a day!" Rachel shouted angrily. "You couldn't just wait until you got out?"
"I was going to find out sometime," Damon argued to her. "How long did you think you could hide the fact that you're starving yourselffrom me?"
"Longer than this," Rachel snapped and shook her head. "It's none of your business," she shot to them both.
"I told you," Damon said through his teeth. "You are my business. So get your ass downstairs and we're going to feed.
Rachel groaned. "Just stop, Damon!" Rachel shouted, completely forgetting that Stefan was in the room as well. "I am not Elena!" At the mention of Elena, she turned to Stefan. "I'm not Elena," she repeated firmly. "So stop treating me like her."
In an instant, she brushed past Stefan and left her own room to go downstairs. Stefan and Damon shared a glance at each other, but there was nothing they could do about her situation. Unfortunately, she was right.
Rachel was most certainly not Elena.
Damon eventually went downstairs, where Rachel did an amazing job at hiding herself.
"I was born in fourteen fifty," Rose informed Damon as he walked into the study. She was sitting by the fireplace, not looking so great. "That makes me five hundred and sixty years old."
Damon smiled lightly. "Well, if you were a bottle of wine…"
Rose ignored his comment. "So I can die," she told him firmly. "I've lived long enough."
But Damon didn't want to think about that. He reached down and grabbed a glass next to Rose. "You know, if you're gonna be maudlin, I'm just gonna kill you myself," Damon warned her, pouring blood from the bag into the cup. "Just to put me out of your misery." Rose gave a small, disapproving laughter. "Come on," Damon said, dragging out the letters. "It's just a little werewolf bite."
Quickly, Rose tagged on. "Just a little fatal-to-a-vampire werewolf bite," she corrected with a small laugh.
"Well, according to legend, which is a notoriously unreliable source," Damon tried again. Rose looked up at him, but she saw right through his efforts. She was going to die and she knew it. "Drink up," Damon commanded, handing her the blood glass. "Blood heals." He gave her a smile as she tilted the glass to her lips and drank the contents.
"Yeah," Rose said after pausing a moment from drinking the deep dark liquid. "It does feel like it's working," she admitted.
"Well, let's have a look," Damon offered and she turned. "Come on. Let me see." He reached out and began to pull the clothing on her shoulder down to examine the wound.
But it was anything but better. It was growing, bloody and nasty. There were dents in her skin, and the infection had grown. It looked like a cross between a burn and a tremendously terrible infection that was spreading across her skin recklessly.
He scrunched his face, not liking what he saw.
"How is it?" Rose asked. To get a better view, he pulled one of her straps down with his hand and examined it further. Bad, he thought to himself. Horrible. Terrible. Worse.
He hesitated, stuttering. "Uh, definitely…better," he told her, not meaning it at all. Rose rolled her eyes, detecting the lie in Damon's tone. He looked up to see a doppelgänger enter the room, and he recognized the big circle of jewelry on the girl's neck. "Right, Elena?" he asked the human.
Elena looked at him nervously, and he motioned for her to lie to Rose with his head and a subtle expression. Rose turned around to see Elena's face.
"Um…" Elena trailed off and nodded. "It's not bad," she lied.
"Where's Stefan?" Damon whispered, trying to get off of that topic. Elena motioned outside.
"He left," she answered. "I need you to talk to him. He's convinced that he has to find Isobel, but I think that's gonna upset Elijah."
"No can do, I'm with Stefan on this one." Damon poured more blood for his friend as he told the human what he felt and handed the glass back to Rose. Elena frowned. "But if you could play nurse for a little while..." Damon trailed off.
"It's not necessary," Rose said immediately, turning around to face them from the couch.
"It is necessary," Damon countered. "Elena's a do-gooder," he explained. "It's in her nature, she just can't resist." He began to exit the study and brushed past Elena. Elena shot Rose a smile, but went after Damon. Unfortunately, as Damon exited the study, he walked right into Rachel, who crossed her arms over her chest.
"Where are you going, Damon?" Rachel asked him.
"Out," Damon returned.
"You're just going to leave me here?" Rachel retorted.
"Damon," Elena breathed as she walked out of the study to see Damon and Rachel arguing, as usual. Damon turned around to face her. "Is she gonna die?" Elena whispered. Damon walked up to the human.
"Probably," he confessed. "The wolf bite caused some kind of infection. It's getting worse," Damon explained.
"Like a poison?" Elena offered.
"I don't know, Elena," Damon told her simply. "I'm not an expert in the field."
"I'm sorry."
Damon shot Elena a look. "Death happens," he told her roughly. "We come, we go. Sooner she dies, the better," Damon told her, agitated. Rachel glanced up at Damon, and he half expected her to slap him or do something drastic like she'd always done. But instead, she just gave him a look of disappointment or pity. Elena raised her eyebrows at him, concerned. Damon flickered his eyes at the both of them. "It's gloomy as hell in here." He turned and walked out of the house without another word, leaving Elena and Rachel alone to take care of Rose.
"I hate this," Rose told them as Rachel and Elena helped the sick vampire into Damon's bed. "I'm a vampire, I haven't had a cold in five centuries." Rachel and Elena helped Rose crawl into Damon's sheets, Elena holding the blood glass in her hands. Rose groaned as Elena pulled off her jacket.
"Just get in bed," Elena instructed.
"We don't get sick," Rose continued. "When we die, it's fast and sudden." Both Elena and Rachel's breath took when they saw the infection had gotten worse. "And it's certainly not drawn out with an illness." Rose pulled the sheets up to her body and sighed, laying down on her back.
"You're not gonna die," Elena told Rose firmly.
"Such a human thing to say," Rose mumbled, her eyes closed as she laid back. Elena looked around Damon's bedroom, twirling her head around to survey the items. His bathroom, his paintings.
"You've never been in Damon's room before, have you?" Rose asked the human doppelgänger. Elena's eyes wandered around the room and spotted a stack of books. She grabbed the first book on top of the pile to see it was Gone With the Wind. She scoffed as Rose directed a question towards Rachel. "You?" she asked.
"Yeah," Rachel admitted, turning around the room. "Twice," she admitted. Rose smiled lightly. "Not like that, Rose—"
"I'm sure." Rose coughed lightly. "Though I know Damon wishes it had been like that."
Rachel was quiet for a moment as Elena turned back to them. "Not what you expected?" Rachel prompted her friend.
Elena shrugged and shook her head. "It's just a room with a bed," she confessed and sat down on the bed next to Rose. Feeling around the material, she tilted her head. "Maybe I expected there to be silk sheets," Elena admitted. Rose laughed and Rachel just smiled as the doppelgänger tried to make the ill vampire feel better.
"You're lucky, you know," Rose told Elena, and looked at Rachel. "Both of you. No one's ever loved me the way you're loved."
"I doubt that," Rachel told the abnormally pale Rose in bed.
"Trevor was my best friend," Rose explained. "Nothing more. I spent all those years on the run with Elijah; I just never thought it was a good idea to set up roots. The whole idea of a family is not exactly compatible with being a vampire."
Rachel nodded. "I understand that," she told Rose empathetically. Rose raised her eyebrows.
"You wanted a family?" Rose asked curiously. "Before or after you became a vampire?"
"Both," Rachel admitted. "But, you're right. It's not compatible with us."
"Damon told me you were a drunk and a druggie who…didn't have anyone or anything," Rose told her. "Most people like that don't want a family, they want…satisfaction for their desires."
Rachel nodded. "My desire was a family," Rachel admitted. "More or less. After all the partying and the drugs…" She sighed. "I would wake up every morning and feel alone inside." Elena looked at Rachel curiously as she shared her story. "I wanted a family more than anything in the whole world. Not even a sibling or a parent or a friend. A family of my own."
Rose smiled. "You'll have it one day."
Rachel nodded. "You will, too," she lied.
Elena grabbed the blood glass from the nightstand and Rose looked at her. "Elena?"
"Hmm?"
"Why are you so eager to give up?"
Elena sighed. "I'm not giving up on anything, here." Elena passed Rose the glass full of blood and rose took it graciously, though she didn't touch it to her lips.
"What do you call this whole deal with Elijah?" Rose asked.
"I call it our best option," Elena explained. "Our best option." She shot a glance at Rachel, who nodded in agreement.
"It's your easiest option," Rose corrected them. Elena shook her head.
"That's not fair."
There was a pause. "You really think your witch friend destroyed the moonstone?"
"I spoke with Bonnie," Elena told her. "I know she had the help of another witch." Elena hesitated. "I'm assuming it's Elijah's witch, so, no. I don't."
Rose frowned. "You really are determined to die, aren't you?" Elena raised her eyebrows. "At least I ran. You're not even trying."
"Running isn't trying." Rachel shook her head. "It's a lifetime of misery."
Rose shook her head in return. "You ran for the wrong reasons," Rose informed her. "I ran to try and stay alive."
She wanted to argue, but how rude would it be? How inappropriate would it be? Rachel didn't agree with Rose's statement, but she pressed nothing more on the matter. Rose closed her eyes and breathed slowly.
"I'm so tired," Rose told them. Rachel grabbed the glass of blood from Rose's hand and put it back on the nightstand, holding onto it for another second. But she turned away eventually and she and Elena got up to leave the room and give Rose some peace. Instead, Rose stopped them from leaving. "No, stop. Wait."
Elena and Rachel turned around, confused. "Tell them to prepare the horses," Rose instructed. Elena raised her eyebrows, but Rachel just shook her head.
"It's okay, Rose," Rachel told her. "Just get some sleep. You'll feel better when you wake up."
Rose tossed in Damon's bed. "Trevor, don't be so stupid," she muttered. "We're never gonna make it there before the sun."
Suddenly, Rose started to widen her eyes and sit forward in the bed. She grunted once before speaking. "Elena, Rachel. I need more blood," she demanded, and Rachel nodded, rushing up to the nightstand, motioning to Elena to get behind her and stay there.
"Yeah, yeah, of course. Here." Rachel gave the glass to Rose and the vampire took it in her hand while bending over in Damon's bed. Rose took the blood and pulled it to her mouth, drinking. For a moment, things were fine, until Rose bent over on the other side and coughed up the blood all over the sheets.
Rachel gave a worried look. "It's okay, Rose," she said carefully and looked at Elena, getting up from her seat on the bed. Elena and Rachel walked over to the sink in Damon's bathroom and wet a towel and walked back to the bed where Rose was coughing up blood. But instead of a body in the bed, there was nothing but empty, crumpled, bloody sheets.
"Elena, get out of here," Rachel commanded through her teeth, and Elena debated it for a moment before she eventually stepped out of the room carefully. Rachel looked around, curious, until she finally stiffened and turned around. Rose, who was much, much stronger than her, pinned her up against the nearest wall and Rachel let out a small scream. Rose's vampire face was not hidden.
"It's all your fault, Katerina!" Rose shouted, her fangs barred. Rachel struggled against Rose, but it was useless. Not only did the vampire have five hundred years on her, but also the three tiny sips of blood she consumed last night had been wasted by morning. It was right about now where she decided that it might've been a good idea to take Damon up on that offer for a morning snack with him.
"You, Katerina, you did this!" Rose snarled.
"It's Rachel, Rose," Rachel whined. "Rose, I'm Rachel. Rose?"
"You betrayed us!"
"I'm not Katherine!" Rachel shouted loudly, feeling herself repeat history all over again. Why? Why did it always have to be like this?
But as Rose's face relaxed and she came to the realization that this doppelgänger was not, in fact, Katherine, Rachel relaxed. "Rachel?" Rose asked, confused. Rachel nodded and let out a breath of air. Elena stood just outside the door, scared out of her mind.
"Oh my God," Rose whispered.
"It's me," Rachel assured her. "It's…it's Rachel." Rachel banged her head against the wall furiously. She hated being weak in times she needed it the most.
"Oh my God, Rachel, I'm so sorry," Rose apologized, on the verge of crying. "I don't know what's happening to me."
"It's all right," Rachel said softly.
"You're gonna be all right," Elena said, interrupting them and walking into the room, still shaking. But she wanted to remain strong.
"Elena, maybe it isn't such a good idea for you to be…" Rachel trailed off, trying not to be heartless. She didn't want Elena to get hurt, but she also didn't want Rose's feelings to get hurt, either. Elena shook her head.
"No," she said firmly. "I'll stay. We'll be fine."
"My mind," Rose continued. "I'm—"
"It was just for a second," Rachel comforted her as she led Rose back to Damon's bed.
"I'm sorry," Rose sobbed and looked at Elena and Rachel. "Don't be scared of me," she pleaded.
"We're not," Rachel told her firmly. "I promise, but—" She looked at Rose while the ill woman climbed back into Damon's bed and lied down. "You need to rest," Rachel ordered.
"I'm scared."
"You're not alone," Elena assured Rose as she walked up to the bed. "Rachel and I are here. We're right here." Compassion oozed out of Elena quickly, and Rachel started to see where the line was drawn between them. Although she was older than Elena by almost half a century, both of them seemed to possess the compassion Katherine did not – though Elena oozed a great ordeal and Rachel didn't really have that super-touchy soft spot. That's where Katherine's half came in – that side of her that just wanted to turn it off and not give a damn about anyone or anything. Kill ruthlessly, feed recklessly, and run fearlessly.
She was lucky to have Elena's compassion, even if it was only small. There was nothing worse than what Katherine wanted her to become.
"Here, where's here?" Rose asked fearfully.
"Damon's bedroom," Elena soothed. "You're in Damon's bedroom."
Rose sighed, barely keeping it together. She almost whimpered, "I wanna go home."
Rachel watched as Elena thought of what to say. "Tell me about it," she said finally. Rose relaxed.
"St. Austell," Rose said in a trance. "Thirty kilometers south of London." A smile spread across Rose's face. "All fields and trees and horses." She closed her eyes and imagined it.
"Sounds beautiful," Rachel said quietly.
Rose continued, "When you live long enough, everything disappears." Elena comforted the vampire with the wet towel she had gotten from the bathroom before Rose's hallucination. "So much time wasted. I just wish I hadn't been so afraid."
Rachel and Elena looked at each other carefully as Rose slowly closed her eyes and tried to rest.
Damon walked into the Mystic Grill, searching desperately for answers. He looked around the restaurant until his eyes finally settled on Jules, who was eating her lunch. But he didn't want to focus on anything but getting an answer to his time bomb of a question and ripping that werewolf's heart out.
Unfortunately, Stefan gripped Damon's arm and pulled him away for a moment. Damon frowned.
"What are you doing here?" Damon asked his brother.
"I'm waiting for you," Stefan admitted. "Listen, there's a lot of people here, okay?"
Damon looked around angrily. "Damn. There goes my plan to rip her spleen through her back," Damon growled, but crinkled his eyebrows at his brother incredulously. Stefan pulled Damon back.
"Hey," Stefan said, turning his brother. "Listen. I know you're upset about Rose."
Damon knew it was true, but he wasn't going to admit it. He looked around. "Why does everyone think I'm upset about Rose?" he pressured. "I'm fine," Damon assured. Stefan sighed. "I don't know if you know this, but sometimes, vampires die." Stefan looked at Damon with disbelief. "I'm gonna have a friendly chat with lady wolf, brother. Ease up."
Damon walked away, forgetting about Stefan behind him. He needed an answer to his question before it was too late, and he was willing to do whatever the hell he needed to get it. That includes ripping her spleen through her back if he had to – in private, of course.
Damon sat down across from Jules at the booth and she didn't even look up at him. "Well, if it isn't the one I meant to kill." She looked up at him. "I'll have to get that right next time."
"You won't live to see another full moon," Damon threatened. "Unless," he reasoned. "Unless you tell me how to cure a wolf bite. Jules glared at him. "And then I won't kill you," Damon offered.
"Promise?"
Damon nodded solemnly. "Yes."
Jules looked down, bit her lip, and grabbed her wallet before sighing and putting down her payment for her meal. "Bite me," she snapped and got up from her seat. Damon got up from his hand gripped her arm, spinning her around while looking at everyone to make sure he didn't look suspicious. He released her when she turned to face him."
"I'm not afraid of you," she sung.
"Then you are very, very stupid."
Jules hesitated. "How's your friend?" she asked curiously. "Rose? Is that her name?" Damon averted the lady wolf's gaze. "Have the chills started? The unbearable pain?" Her voice deepened.
"If there's a cure, tell me," Damon told her. "Or start watching your back," he threatened again.
"Did I mention the dementia?" Jules continued. "It'll eat away at her brain. Soon, she'll be rabid." Damon shook his head at her. "You want a cure?" Jules prompted. "I'll tell you the only cure that exists." While she said her last words, she backed away from him. "Take a stake and drive it through her heart," Jules said carefully and walked out.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Rachel sighed as she traced the top of the crystal glass she had poured for herself filled with bourbon. A few seconds before, she had told Elena reluctantly about her diet after Elena's constant pushing about why she wasn't strong enough. To be honest, despite the fact that Rose was five hundred years old, Rose was weaker than normal, and Rachel should've been able to exhaust some strength fighting the older vampire. So, she spilled her beans on the secret of the Rachel Diet.
"Because," Rachel began, "this is nobody's business. I don't go asking you people what you had for lunch," she quipped, proving a point.
Elena shook her head. "This is different. You're practically starving yourself!"
Rachel rolled her eyes. "Please. This is more like…fasting. I believe that I shouldn't harm anyone, so I don't feed on humans."
"And animals?" Elena prompted. "Stefan feeds on animals."
Rachel frowned. "I can't feed on animals. They're human beings, too, you know." Animal rights activist, Rachel thought with a sour smile.
Her doppelgänger sighed. "Blood bags?" Elena suggested.
"How would you feel if some vampire was stealing your blood from of the hospital for her to snack on?" Rachel shouted.
Elena threw her hands up in the air. "Starving yourself is not an option, Rachel!"
"Look at me!" Rachel demanded. "I'm fine, Elena. I'm fine. I don't understand why this is such a big deal!"
"You are not fine," Elena pushed. "You basically got your ass kicked back there by Rose. If it weren't for her realizing that you were Rachel, not Katherine, you would've been injured somehow by now," Elena reasoned. "Why do you do this to yourself? It's like an eating disorder, Rachel. This can't be good for you."
"Of course it's not good for me." Rachel scoffed. "I hate doing it. My first natural instinct is to kill, but I spent so much time starving myself and teaching myself how to stay away from that instinct." Rachel breathed slowly. "I…I don't like killing. I don't like feeding. When it's really that bad, when I feel like I'm getting weaker and starting to desiccate, I feed. But my body's used to being starved. I'm perfectly fine."
Elena shook her head. "Fine," she said, crossing her arms. "You're perfectly fine." Elena glared at Rachel. "Don't feed because you're not 'fine', feed because it'll make you stronger and faster." Elena paused when Rachel said nothing. "You don't have to feed on humans, feed on the blood bags." Still, Rachel said nothing. Elena shook her head and looked down at the floor. "Fine. Just…there are blood bags in the basement." Elena gestured her thumb upstairs. "I'm going to go get Rose some new sheets," she informed the vampire and left the room.
Rachel sighed. Was Elena right? Were they all right? She remembered that feeling she got when Rose practically slammed her spine into that wall, even weak on her illness. It was a feeling she didn't want to relive.
Maybe Elena was right. Maybe…Maybe they were all right.
And…one blood bag couldn't hurt her. She wasn't afraid of "falling off the wagon", as Stefan or Damon would put it, she was afraid of hurting something. Someone. Herself, maybe? All she could feel whenever she fed was remorse.
Nevertheless, her doppelgänger was right. With a large, heavy, reluctant sigh, Rachel turned down the hall and began to walk down to the cellar to get her lunch. Maybe a whole blood bag would last her for a longer time than the rest of them.
Or maybe it would last her for a shorter time, considering how long she's fasted on actual human blood.
What the…? Rachel asked herself as she spotted an open, flat blood bag on the floor. Fresh blood had oozed out of it, and it was on her fingertip. She brought it to her lips and tasted the freshness, and felt that empty feeling in her stomach again. It passed. Maybe she was getting used to it.
But it didn't matter. Why was there an empty blood bag on the floor? Elena came up behind her as Rachel turned the corner and watched as someone slurped the blood from multiple blood bags violently.
Rose.
The fridge that held the blood had been raided, and multiple bags lay flat on the floor next to the hungry vampire. She wasn't strong enough. Rachel wasn't strong enough.
Elena walked behind Rachel, and Rachel turned around to see her with wide eyes. "No, no!" Rachel panicked, and Rose turned around to see them both. Elena breathed deeply and Rose dropped the blood bag she was rapidly feeding on to speak a word.
"Katerina," she whispered.
"No," Rachel insisted, but Rose took in a deep breath and braced to move. "Elena, run!" Elena ran through the bottom of the cellar, trying desperately to get out. Eventually, Rachel just took Elena's hand and pulled Elena with Rachel, getting them to higher ground. But she wasn't faster. She wasn't stronger. Rose growled as she neared them.
"Rose, stop!" Rachel commanded, protecting Elena with her body. "It's Elena and Rachel. Stop." Rose stopped in her tracks as Rachel breathed deeply, afraid for herself and the human behind her. "I'm not Katherine. You're hallucinating," she explained.
Rose's vampire face did not relax, but she remained calm for the most part. "I'm not Katherine," Rachel repeated. Rose's face relaxed and Rachel whispered one more time, "I'm not Katherine."
But suddenly, the morbid Rose didn't care. Her face vamped-out and she growled, lunging at both of the doppelgängers. Elena let out a large scream and so did Rachel. She couldn't protect them both. She couldn't.
But she did her best to try. "Run!" Rachel commanded Elena and Elena did as told. Rachel fought Rose hard as Rose tried to kill her. But her efforts weren't working, so she would have to do something else.
Her eyes caught on the lapis lazuli bracelet around her wrist, and she looked up to see a curtain in her reach. With a yank, she pulled the curtain down from the rod, exposing the mid-day sun. Rose screamed and fell off of Rachel, her skin burning. Rachel flitted to the door while Rose was preoccupied, but instead, Rose caught up with her and slammed the door right back in her face, yelling angrily. She had only pissed the sick vampire off more. Rose tried to bite Rachel, but Rachel dug her nails into Rose's wound, earning a vicious scream from the vampire. But not only did it hurt Rose, it hurt Rachel, too, hearing the cruel sound emerge from the undead woman's lips. It made her shudder inside, but she couldn't think about it now. Quickly, she flashed away from Rose to follow Elena's scent, which she eventually realized lead to Stefan's bedroom. Elena had shut the door, but Rachel pounded on it.
"Elena, it's Rachel! Open up!" She pounded on the door harder, feeling Rose on her tail. Something moved, and Rachel opened the door quickly, squeezing in just by the crack. Together, Rachel and Elena pushed the dresser against the door again and locked it once more. Rachel took in a deep breath, catching it.
"Damn him." Rachel groaned through closed teeth. Elena raised her eyebrows.
"What?"
"Damon asked me to feed with him this morning before he asked us to play nurse," Rachel explained, panting. "I turned him down. Damn him for being right!"
Elena ignored it. "I called Damon. He should be on his way."
Rachel nodded. "Good." She gestured to the window. "Elena, open the curtains. Get some sun in here." Elena obliged, running over to the curtains and thrusting them open. As she did so, Rachel snapped her foot against two legs of a chair so it broke into two wooden stakes, one for each of them. It would royally suck, but if it had to be done, it had to be done.
Suddenly, the door banged once, making them both jump for once.
"Elena? Rachel?" Rose asked through the door. "I know that it's you two and not Katherine." Rose coughed and retched, and Elena looked towards Rachel for advice. Rachel shook her head slightly, indicating a big "NO" on the entrance of the ill near-death woman. She couldn't take chances with Elena, and she couldn't take chances with herself. Not that it would be such a tragic thing if she died, but she wasn't desperately seeking her death.
Unlike what some people think she was trying to do by handing herself over to Klaus.
"Rachel, Elena, please," Rose pleaded through the door. "I need your help." She retched again.
But they couldn't take chances. Damon would be there soon, and if Rachel was lucky, with a whole shitload of blood bags.
Eventually, it turned dark outside. Rachel and Elena were still in Stefan's room, waiting it out.
"Is she gone?" Elena asked quietly. Rachel listened.
"I can't be sure," Rachel admitted. "But I don't hear anything."
"Do you think we should check it out?" Elena proposed.
Rachel bit her lip slowly, debating against herself. Finally, she nodded.
"Let's go," she told the human and together they got up from their positions and walked towards the doors, the stakes still ready in hand. Both of them pushed the dresser away from the door and slowly reached out to the lock, where Rachel's hand clamped on the knob and Elena slowly switched the lock to be unlocked. The door opened, revealing an empty hallway, but Rachel went in front, cautious just in case. Both of them made their way down the stairs and into the foyer, where they looked around, searching for Rose. When Rachel turned her head, she saw the door wide open, the night air filling into the house. Elena gasped, and Rachel tensed, but after a moment, Rachel concentrated.
"I don't hear anything," Rachel admitted to Elena. "Everything's still, for the most part. I'm not too keen with my senses," she admitted.
"You could fix that," Elena pointed out. Rachel nodded.
"I know."
But, suddenly, she froze in her step, and Elena froze with her. Quickly, she turned around, pointing the stake at whoever the intruder was. Elena turned with her, gasping in fear, the stake firm in her hand also.
It was only Damon.
He glanced at Rachel, and his eyes moved to the wood in her hand. She breathed out a heavy sigh of relief and lowered her weapon. Damon knotted his eyebrows together.
"You okay?" he asked them. Rachel nodded carefully, and Damon looked around the house. "Where's Rose?" Damon inquired. Rachel ran a hand through her hair.
"I-I don't know," she admitted. Damon shot her an inglorious look and she sighed, making her feel as inglorious as the look was. And that was serious; consider it was Damon Salvatore making her feel shameful.
It was then when Damon received a call, so he took out his phone and answered it roughly.
"Yes?"
"Damon?" Sheriff Forbes said on the other side of the line. "I need you to get to the Mystic Falls high school…now. It's...there's been an attack." She didn't elaborate.
Damon nodded to himself. "I'll be right there," he promised and hung up the phone. "Let's go," he instructed to them.
When they arrived at the high school, Damon instructed Elena and Rachel to go off for a while, just so that they didn't ruin things with the sheriff. But all they could think about was Rose and how stupid they were to just let her out of their sight, despite the fact that the vampire tried to kill them both.
"Can you hear him?" Elena asked curiously. Rachel sighed and tried to focus.
"Hi."
"Thanks for coming so quickly."
"Yeah, I was close by, Liz. What happened?"
"A vampire. Luckily, one of my deputies discovered the body before anyone else saw him."
That's when it started fading away, slowly but surely. Rachel tried to refocus her senses, but it wasn't working. She had to have fed really, really well on animals before she had her senses to the best of her abilities.
"What are they saying?" Elena pressured.
"Elena, I can't…" Rachel sighed in exasperation. "I'm too weak."
Elena hesitated for a moment. "The last time you fed? Really fed?"
Rachel paused. "I…" Elena shot her a look. "Okay. A couple days…maybe weeks ago," she admitted.
"Rachel!"
"I'm sorry!" Rachel admitted. "I just can't bring myself to do it. I can't stand taking someone's choice away from them."
Elena scowled and stuck out her hand after a while. "Fine," she snapped. "Don't take their choice away. I'm offering," Elena pushed her wrist at her pretend sister. "Feed, please."
Rachel shook her head. "No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
Rachel sighed. "Elena, no," she told Elena, her voice raspy. "Calm down." With another large sigh, she looked around until she finally found someone in her sights. Rachel shook for a moment before walking up to the boy with light auburn hair and piercing green eyes. This boy had a life and she was just…taking a bit away from it.
The world was a cruel, cruel place.
"I'm sorry," Rachel moaned lightly. "I just…" Rachel sighed. "Please don't scream," she compelled. "You understand? Don't scream."
"I won't scream," the boy said, but he was questioning it – she could tell. With a shift, she changed into her predatory face and sank her fangs into the random boy's neck. Elena shifted her head away, as it was always a little hard for her to watch.
Eventually, after a few hardy gulps, she pulled away. That feeling of sickness rocked in her stomach, but the sickness was curing itself faster now. She felt better in a couple seconds and sighed. She was stronger, for the most part.
"Don't remember this and cover the wound up," Rachel instructed the male. "Repeat it to me."
"I won't remember this and I'll cover my wound up," he relayed in a monotone voice.
"Walk away."
The boy turned and walked away, taking the collar of his shirt and covering the neck wound with his collar. Rachel sighed and licked the blood off of her lips, which she had carefully made sure did not drip on anything of hers. She turned around to Elena, who crossed her arms.
"I was willing."
"Yeah? I wasn't." Rachel brushed past her and stood in a place for a moment. "Now let me listen," she demanded. Elena whipped out her phone and began to call Stefan while Rachel caught the end of Sheriff Forbes' and Damon's conversation.
"I'll take the east side. You go west?"
"Sure. Okay."
A few minutes later, after Elena hung up on Stefan's voicemail after leaving a message, Damon appeared behind them. Elena's concern was mostly Stefan at the moment.
"Hey, have you heard from Stefan? Do you know what he's up to?" Elena pressured.
Damon looked around. "Baby brother's not exactly my priority right now," Damon admitted. "Here, take this," Damon instructed, handing Elena a wooden stake. He pulled one out for Rachel, too, and extended it towards her. Rachel shook her head.
"I just fed," she told him. "I'm strong enough now."
Damon eyed her, narrowing his lids. "You fed?" he asked.
Rachel nodded. "I realized you were all right," she admitted. "I'm not going to be able to protect myself if I don't feed right."
Damon shot a glance towards her, and she couldn't decipher what it meant. Was it surprise? Worry? Shame? She sighed to herself.
"Come on," he said eventually, grabbing their arms lightly. "Let's go." They moved out to find Rose.
Eventually, they found her when Damon heard a woman scream loudly with his senses.
"Rose, stop!" Damon commanded, and Rose dropped the person to the ground and tackled Damon. But Damon was stronger than her, considering the fact that she was ill. Rachel wanted to do something, but Damon seemed like he had it under control.
"Rose! Rose!" he shouted. "It's me. It's Damon." She struggled against him, the blood showing from inside her stained mouth. After a few tries of constantly repeating, "It's Damon", Rose relaxed.
"It's Damon," he said eventually, whispering.
Rose turned to look at the dead woman she just freshly killed. Rachel walked towards the body and looked at Damon. "Do you want me to clean this up?" she offered.
Damon shook his head. "Leave it," he ordered. "The sheriff will find it." Rachel raised an eyebrow at him, but he wasn't in the mood to argue with her this time. Besides, Rose began to weep.
"Did I do this?" Rose asked, looking at them all. Elena was beside them, watching as Rose cried hysterically. "Oh my God. I didn't mean to hurt anybody," she assured them, sobbing. "I never wanted to hurt anybody." Rachel's heart pained and Damon nodded to the rabid vampire.
"I know."
Rose wept further. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
"Come on," Damon proposed. "Let's get you home."
Rose cried, "No, I don't have a home. I haven't had a home in so long." She was in so much pain. Rachel stepped closer, but Damon shot her a warning look. She had never seen him this way before with her. Angry. Sure, he got frustrated with her sometimes, but never angry.
Rachel backed away, siding with Elena instead. Damon's eyes softened, but he didn't say anything to her.
"Oh, make it stop. Please, make it stop. I hate it! Make it stop!" Rose wept while growling.
"Come on," Damon said eventually, getting off of Rose and pulling her into his arms. Rachel and Elena watched as he brushed past them and walked into the night to return back to the house.
"How could you let it happen?" Damon whispered angrily. "I told you that you needed to feed. I told you that you had to protect yourself."
"I know, Damon," Rachel said, somewhat disinterested. She gripped the glass of bourbon with vervain in her hand from earlier this morning. "But I'm not sorry that I didn't want to feed," she told him firmly.
He stared at her incredulously. "For once, just once – can you admit that you're wrong?" Damon growled, frustrated.
"I'm not going to apologize over the fact that I wanted to not be a monster. I didn't want to be a killer." This time, she stared at him incredulously.
Damon scoffed. "It's not about the kill, Rachel," he told her. "You know that. There are more ways than just the vein. Blood bags and animals. That's all you had to do. On a regular basis."
She laughed bitterly. "Well, I'm sorry, Damon, if I don't want to be a cold-blooded monstrous killer like you are, on a regular basis," Rachel spat, but she knew she went too far. He was silent, his stare cold and hard. She softened her look at him. "Look, Damon, I'm tired. Despite my earlier efforts to feed today, it wasn't nearly enough." Rachel glanced at him. "I'm going to go to bed," she informed him. "Wake me if anything is wrong."
Damon said nothing as she tried to leave the room, but she stopped at his shoulder, deciding that she couldn't leave it like that. She may hate him, but he was starting to grow on her. Ever so slightly.
"I know you care about Rose," Rachel whispered lightly. "And I'm so very sorry for what's happened," she said seriously. Her hand reached out and grabbed his chin, turning his head towards her slowly. "You'll get through this," she told him firmly. "I promise you."
"Since when did you care?" Damon whispered, eyeing her cautiously.
Rachel opened her mouth to say something, but closed it. "Since you started," she said after a while and let her hand slide to his shoulder for comfort. "Goodnight."
The truth was, she felt bad for calling him a cold-blooded killer. Maybe he seemed like it when she thought he was nothing but the sick, twisted monster that turned her into a vampire to pretend to be his ex-girlfriend for eternity, but now he was different. Still Damon, but different. Not better, but…different.
A couple minutes later, Damon watched as Rose stirred in his bed. "Hi, there," Damon whispered.
"I'm sorry," she said simply.
"You went on a murderous rampage." He wrinkled his nose. "It happens." She pulled in a deep breath, and a moment of silence passed before she continued.
"I'm sorry, Elena," Rose said as Elena entered the room. Damon looked back at her. "I don't like taking human life. I never have."
Damon turned at Elena, slightly annoyed. "You shouldn't be here," he snarled.
"It's the worst part about it," Rose whispered. "The hunt. The need to kill. The thirst." Rose paused. "The pleasure it brings you afterwards. I wasn't meant to be evil."
Suddenly, Rachel walked into the room, and Damon eyed her, too. "I…couldn't sleep," she admitted carefully and looked Rose. Slowly, she walked into the room, but Damon held up his hand to stop her from coming any closer.
"Get away from here," he told her with a growl. She took her hand in his and brushed him away, sitting down next to Rose, ignoring Damon completely.
"Being a vampire doesn't make you evil," Rachel whispered to Rose. "It's the way you choose to live that eternity that makes you evil." Rachel paused. "You're not evil, Rose," she assured the dying vampire. "You never will be." Rachel smiled. "And some day, you'll have a family of your own."
Rose sighed. "I doubt that." She gave a sorrowful laugh.
"It hurts?" Rachel prompted. Rose nodded.
"It hurts," Rose agreed.
"Well, then stop talking about it," Damon snapped and grabbed Rachel by the crook of her elbow, dragging her up. "You need to leave. I'm not asking you again."
"Damon's a lot like me," Rose said, interrupting them. Damon and Rachel looked back at the pale Rose. "He wants to care," she explained. Damon released Rachel, frustrated, and walked a few feet away. "The minute he does, he runs away from it." Rose looked at Elena, who ended up next to Rachel. "I'm sorry for what I've done today," she choked.
"I know," Elena whispered.
"And you need to fight," Rose ordered her. She looked at Rachel. "You, too. You both need to fight. I know that you're scared, but you have to do it anyway," Rose gushed out. Suddenly, she began to cough. Rachel reached out and tried to comfort Rose, and Damon and Elena watched. Rose stopped coughing.
"Mm," she mumbled. "Mm." Rose looked at Rachel seriously. "Why are you so nice to me?" she asked. "I slept with Damon. You walked in on us last night." She coughed again. "You should hate me."
Rose shrugged and smiled. "Us doppelgängers," she joked, looking at Elena. Her gaze shifted back to Damon. "We're just do-gooders by nature." She smiled sadly and turned back to Rose. "But Elena's human. That's her excuse," Rachel quipped with a happier smile.
Rose smiled back. "You can never forget it," she whispered. "What it's like to be human."
Rachel shook her head. "Of course not," she said quietly. "Never."
"It haunts me," Rose admitted. Rachel nodded her head in agreement.
"Me, too," Rachel agreed. "But it's the only thing that keeps us going," she told Rose, and Rose nodded and smiled.
"Doesn't hurt as much anymore," she told Rachel. Rachel smiled and Rose grunted, and suddenly she groaned and yelled. Elena and Rachel looked back at Damon.
"What do we do?" Elena pressured.
"Go," Damon snapped. He pushed Rachel and Elena to the side and sat down beside Rose's head, slipping his arms around her as she yelled.
"Damon—" Rachel started.
"Just go," he told her, trying to remain calmer, but it wasn't working. "I got this," he assured them, and Elena flinched slightly. Rachel eventually ushered Elena out along with her own body, carefully watching as Damon comforted the dying Rose.
Rose sighed, all calmed down from her earlier episode. "Who'd have thought you'd be a nice guy?" Rose asked, her voice low. He held her hand in his and her head rested on his chest. Damon laughed lightly.
"I'm not nice," he countered and tilted his head at her. "I'm mean. I like it."
"You lie," Rose told him.
"Shh," Damon hushed her. "Shh. Just sleep," he ordered. "Just sleep." He stroked her shoulder and rested his chin on her hair, waiting for that moment she let go.
Rose gallivanted through the fields, soaking up the warm sunshine he had created with his powers. He sat on the ground, staring into her idea of paradise. To be honest, it wasn't bad.
A hell of a lot better than the personal hell he was living in where he was in love with two woman and neither of them love him back.
Rose sat down beside him and spoke. "This was my favorite place to come as a girl," she admitted. "How did you know?"
"Word gets around." He smirked. Rose gave him a look and he smiled again. "You told Elena and Rachel," Damon revealed. Rose chuckled.
"Am I dreaming?" she asked.
He didn't want to ruin the moment, so he just shrugged, and Rose chuckled further, sighing to herself blissfully. The happiness on her face did not go past him.
They both sighed.
'The sun is so warm," she told him. "I miss this." Rose turned her head to look at him. "I miss being human."
Damon looked at her in return. "Humanity's not all it's cracked up to be," he warned her.
She continued, ignoring him. "I had friends. I had a family. I mattered."
"You still do," Damon assured her.
"No." Rose shook her head. "But you do." He turned. "You've built a life, whether you want to admit it or not," she told him. "I spent five hundred years just…existing."
Damon shook his head. "You didn't have a choice, you were running from Klaus."
"No, there's always a choice," she retorted, starting an argument. Damon turned away from her and decided this wasn't a good way to end her life.
"You know, you are ruining our perfect day with your strange, philosophical babbling," he accused her. They both chuckled and he pulled her into his arms.
She whispered in his ear, "I'd like to enjoy the fresh air. Will you enjoy it with me?" Damon pulled away and nodded.
"For a while," he agreed, grinning at her. Rose returned the smile and he fit her onto his chest, their hands interlocked.
Damon looked off into the distance, knowing what he had to do, and it was killing him inside.
"Thank you," Rose told him as they played with each other's hands.
"For what?" Damon asked.
"The pain's gone," she told him with a light tone.
"I'm glad," Damon whispered quietly.
"Will I see them again?" Rose asked, turning to him. "My family?" she clarified. Damon looked at her, tilting his head. What was he supposed to say to that?
"I think you will see whoever you want to see," he informed her. Rose grinned.
"That would be nice," she admitted. "Maybe I'll see Trevor, too." Rose pulled away from him slightly and said those words he needed to hear before he ended it all. "I'm not afraid anymore," she told him suddenly.
Damon's hand released Rose's and he reached to the side, his hand gripping along a piece of rough, sharpened wood. He grasped it with two hands and positioned it at her heart. His face was in her hair, slow tears falling out of his eyes. It was supposed to be him. He was supposed to die.
Rose got up from her position and looked down at Damon.
"I'll race you to the trees," she challenged.
"Well, you'll lose," he warned her. Rose shook her head.
"I'm older and faster."
"Oh, you think?" Damon got up from his sitting position and Rose laughed whole-heartedly. "Well, I'm controlling this dream. Maybe I'll cheat."
She eyed him. "On the count of three," she warned.
Damon kept the wooden stake above her heart, hesitating slightly. But it was better to but her out of her misery. It had to be.
"One."
He gripped the weapon tighter, afraid to do it. Why did it have to be her?
"Two."
He couldn't handle it any longer. He stuck the stake through Rose's heart, and she responded with a gasp. His eyes were wet, and his hands still gripped the stake hard. The dream had ended, and a tear rolled down his cheek. Rose died, then and there, right in his arms, his tears falling into her hair. He leaned on her, afraid to let her go.
But he would have to.
Sheriff Forbes pulled up to Damon's car behind him, and Damon straightened out from leaning against the side of his Camaro. He took out the keys to his trunk and walked behind his car.
"Here's your vampire," Damon said simply, lifting the trunk and revealing the dead Rose in the compartment.
"How did you find her?" The Sheriff's eyes went wide.
"Doesn't matter." Damon tried not to snap. "What matters is that it's over."
"Thank you, Damon." Sheriff Forbes sighed. "Once again, you've help keep this town safe."
"I'll…take care of burying the body," he offered. Liz nodded and he turned to shut the trunk, feeling his heart pain out of remorse. It was supposed to be for him. He was supposed to die.
That thought would not die inside of him. Guilt washed over him like an ocean wave.
He hung onto the lid of the trunk for an extra second before slamming it down.
When Damon returned home, all he wanted to do was soak in a bath and sleep the pain away. He wanted to turn it off, but he knew he couldn't do it.
A doppelgänger was waiting for him. He had learned by now and looked at her neck, which barred the necklace of Elena Gilbert.
Great, he thought. Just what I need.
"You were supposed to leave," he snarled.
"I did," Elena admitted. "Rachel kicked me out. But then I came back to make sure you were both okay."
"I don't know where Rachel is," Damon admitted as Elena handed him a bourbon glass. "But I appreciate the gesture. I'm just glad it's over," he lied, tilting his head back and draining the bourbon from his cup.
Elena frowned. "You know I don't believe that."
Damon set the glass down after finishing all of the alcohol in it. He gestured towards the door. "Go home, Elena. Get some rest. It's a whole new day tomorrow."
"Damon, I'm your friend."
"I'm well aware of that," he snapped. But she didn't give up.
"And a friend usually knows when their friend is hurting," she explained.
"What do you wanna hear?" Damn growled. "That I care about Rose? That I care about Rachel? That I care about you? That I'm upset?" he proposed. "Well I don't care about any of you and I'm not."
"There you go," Elena pointed out. "Pretending to turn it off. Pretending not to feel." Elena shook her head. "Damon, you're so close. We all care about you; Rachel cares about you, despite those best efforts of hers. Don't give up."
"I feel, Elena," Damon told her. "I feel something, okay? And it sucks." He paused. "What sucks even more is that it was supposed to be me. Jules was coming after me." Damon shook his head. "And on top of all of it, I still feel all of the things I felt when I turned my emotions back on in the seventies. When I chased Rachel down everywhere she went. When I watched her with humans, strugglingwith vampire life because she wouldn't let me help her."
Elena straightened. "You feel guilty," she clarified with a sense of hope. "You love her." She shook her head. "Don't give up. She just needs time," Elena pleaded. "You both need time."
Damon inhaled sharply. "That would be human of me, wouldn't it, Elena, and I'm not human," Damon snapped. "You're one to talk about giving up. All you've done is give up!" Elena stared at him and he gestured back to the door again. "Go home, Elena. There's been enough doom, gloom, and personal growth for one night," he quipped.
Elena sighed. "Okay," she agreed. "I will." Elena looked at Damon for a moment before wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into an embrace – which he didn't return. He tried to hold the tears in, relishing in today's events. She held onto him for a bit longer before whispering, "Goodnight, Damon."
And there she went, out the door just like he asked.
Damon laid in the middle of the road, motionless. His feelings had been bottled up for so long; it was like a can of worms. But he was determined to close it and move on with his life.
But that, unfortunately, would never happen. Because of them. The doppelgängers. Katherine. Elena. Rachel.
Rachel, Damon thought again with a long sigh. What a mistake.
Headlights flashed in the corner of his eye, and he saw a human get out of her car and jog up to him.
"Sir? Are you okay?"
Damon grunted.
"What happened?"
"I'm…lost." And drunk.
"And you're laying in the middle of the road?" the human prompted, confused.
"Not that kind of lost." He sat up straight with a sigh. "Metaphorically." He turned to the human. "Existentially."
"Do you need help?" she offered.
"Well." Damon pulled out his flask. "Yes I do," he admitted. "Can you help me?" Damon tilted the flask back and drank its contents.
"You're drunk," she stated.
"No. Uh, well, yes, a little. Maybe," Damon stuttered. The woman began to walk away. "No! Please don't leave. I really do need help," he pleaded, but she just kept walking.
He flitted up to her and grasped her by the shoulders, and the woman let out a gasp.
"Don't move," Damon warned her, compelling her.
"I-I don't want any trouble," she told him.
"Neither do I," Damon admitted. "But all I got is trouble." He released her, but she didn't move.
"Why can't I move?" she cried after he offered her some bourbon from his flask, but ended up tilting it to his own mouth.
He ignored her and stepped closer. "What's your name?" Damon asked.
"Jessica."
"Jessica, I have a secret," Damon confessed. "I have a big one, but I've never said it out loud," Damon groaned. "I mean, what's the point? It's not gonna change anything!" he snapped. "It's not gonna make me good. Make me adopt a puppy!" Damon snarled. "I can't be what other people want me to be." He paused. "What she wants me to be." Damon gripped her shoulders and the girl gasped again. "This is who I am, Jessica," he warned her. She cried harder.
"Are you gonna hurt me?" Jessica wept.
"I'm not sure," Damon admitted. "Because you"—Damon wrapped his hands around her face—"are my existential crisis." Damon bit his lip, debating. "Do I kill you, do I not kill you?"
Jessica whimpered, "Please, don't."
"But I have to, Jessica," Damon told her. "Because I'm not human," he growled. "And I miss it. I miss it more than anything in the world!" he said through his teeth. "I keep blaming her for accusing me of taking her humanity away. I blame her for being so melodramatic that I ripped her mortality right out of those hands," Damon hissed. "But I'm blaming no one but myself." He sighed angrily. "And she's so right to hate me. She's completely right to want to kill me everyday for what I did to her!" Damon shouted. "That is my secret," he complained. "But there's only so much hurt a man can take."
"Please, don't," she repeated, crying.
Damon looked into Jessica's eyes. "Okay," he said, his gaze dropping. A tear fell from his eye and he looked back up at her, his hands gripping her shoulders. "You're free to go," he compelled.
She gasped and ran away, but Damon turned around and made a snap decision. In an instant, he was behind Jessica and turned her around, sinking his fangs into her neck. She let out multiple screams, but it didn't stop Damon from sucking her completely dry, letting her drop to the ground, lifeless, after he could feel the blood empty from her body. Blood pooled around his mouth, and he felt completely numb.
"Damon!" Rachel gasped, flitting over to him. He looked at her and his heart broke just staring at the sight of her. She looked down at the ground to the woman. "Oh, Damon." She sighed and looked back up at him, but she could tell he was hurting. "Shh," she commanded as he stumbled, drunk.
"What are you doing here?" Damon growled.
"I came to find you," Rachel admitted. "I wanted to make sure you were okay when Elena told me what happened…" Rachel breathed and eyed the body on the ground. She looked up at him with concern in her eyes.
He laughed bitterly. "Well, go ahead!" he challenged. "Lecture me on how I'm a heartless killer who selfishly killed you in order to spend the rest of my life with you pretending you were Katherine." Damon shook his head. "I could try and convince you that I didn't mean it, but you won't listen."
Rachel shook her head. "This isn't who you are," she whispered quietly. "I know that."
"This?" Damon gestured around. "Baby, this is everything I am!" He reveled.
She stepped closer to him and wiped his mouth with her thumb, trying to rid the blood on his mouth. "No," she said sternly. "You're not. I know that," she told him, firm. "I was wrong."
Damon eyed her carefully. "You.." he breathed.
"Damon, you're drunk," Rachel reasoned. "Let's get you back to the house. Please."
"I don't want to go back!" Damon exclaimed. "Not with you!" It was like he was a five-year-old child. Rachel shook her head.
"Come on." She grabbed his hand. "Please. Let's go back."
Damon shook his head vigorously and pulled is hands out of hers. Rachel stepped forward and took his face in her hands, opening her mouth. But Damon eyed her with wild eyes and interrupted her words.
"Stay away from me," Damon ordered, but he didn't enforce it. He took the flask out and drank from it again, but Rachel took it out of his hand and slipped it in her pocket.
"You are better than this," she told him sternly. "You know that. I know that."
"No." Damon shook his head again. "No, I don't know that. You don't know that. You hate me, remember?"
Rachel inhaled. "Please," she pleaded desperately. "Come back to the house with me. You'll be fine, I promise."
Damon lowered his head. "No," he told her sternly. "I won't be fine," he swore. "I'll never be fine."
That was literally eleven thousand words, guys, I'm SO sorry you had to sit through that crappy chapter of eleven thousand words. I…wow. Just wow.
Uh, so, yeah, if this is anything like the last really, really, epically long chapter, I'm going to wind up getting 2 people with feedback, so…yeah. I mean, I'd like to get at least 5 reviews, but…it's all up to you guys.
Don't forget about the poll.
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Love,
KatherineSalvatore1918
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