Mmmkayyyy, here it is! I finally was able to get this out after suffering from severe writers block. I own nothing here... :'( It all Dick Wolf who had better have Elliot and Liv kiss before Chris Meloni leaves (theres a lot of rumours going around but sadly I think its coming up soon) or I shall start a riot and we shall attack ;)
Except, for a few tears, I didn't cry after that fight. I wasn't just mad, I was pissed. I was shocked that no matter how many times I told him I couldn't do it, he suggested to stay anyway. It was like nothing I said was mattering to him. It felt like my feelings, my personal being didn't matter. I knew I couldn't take it anymore. I knew that after hearing Maci's story, having the doctors tell me both girls were very unhealthy and could've easily taken a turn for the worse, seeing Maci scream and flip out when a male nurse walked in, I knew I was done.
I knew I was done because I had the courage to tell Cragen, to say those words. Before when I felt like quitting, my mind told me I had to do it. That I just needed to talk to someone. So I would. I would take my mind of the case somehow and finally decide to stay. But this time I knew for sure, I had this gut feeling saying I couldn't take it anymore. I had a voice screaming in my head, telling me it was time. And I was right.
I knew Cragen was going to call me into his office eventually and figured it would be soon. So right as I was about sit down I heard his door open.
"Olivia? Can we talk?" He called out.
"Yes Captain." I walked over and I could feel my colleagues eye's on me. I sat down across from him and he cleared his throat.
"Can you tell me why you quit?"
"I couldn't handle it anymore. This case…just pushed me to the edge. So I knew I had to quit before I fell."
"Why this case? We've had harder ones before. Or is there something else?" He questioned and I stared down. Something else? Wait, Elliot came to talk to him. So maybe he said something. And then it hit me, Elliot probably told him about my PCOS. God damn him.
"Something else?" I asked anyway.
"Are you having any personal problems?" I sighed before answering.
"I called my doctor this morning. I have PCOS."
"Oh, I'm sorry Liv. My mother's best friend had that. So is that why you quit?"
"Partly. Like you've said, we've had tougher cases then this. But seeing Cora and Maci scream when a male nurse came into there room, hearing Maci tell me what happened, I just finally realized I cant wake up everyday and have to do this. Im sorry."
"Don't be sorry, it's hard. I get it, we all get it. Are you 100% positive though?"
"Yes sir." I nodded. He walked over and I stood up. He embraced me in a hug.
"It doesn't matter whether you work here or not, you are welcome any time to the squad. All of us will always be here for you. Come say hi every once in awhile."
"I will captain." I smiled and we pulled apart.
"And if Stabler ever gives you any crap about anything, come by and I'll drown him in paper work," we both laughed but I sighed inside. Stabler, would be out there and I would have to face him.
"Then you'll be seeing me a lot." We laughed again.
"There's paper work and all that stuff to fill out but you can do that tomorrow."
"Okay thanks, I'll probably start cleaning out my desk." Right as I was walking out I ran into Casey.
"Hey Liv, I got that search warrant for the Parker/ Steven apartment."
"I cant take it, give it to Cragen."
"Why?"
"I quit."
"You what?" She shrieked, getting looks from everyone.
"Shut up! I quit I said, and if you scream one more time…"
"Okay, okay. But God I don't know what to say. Um congrats?"
"Sure thanks." We laughed a little.
"I have to go give this to Cragen but when I come out we can talk."
"Okay good. Also, we're going shopping tonight."
"May I ask why?"
"We have something else to talk about." I could already picture her face when I told her I had PCOS. Not good. She had been almost as disappointed as me, she had been waiting forever to be a godmother.
Elliot came back then, and I could tell he felt guilty but was still mad. He sat at his desk and started in on paper work.
"Oooh there's your sexy Stabler." She smirked.
Ever since she got me drunk and I admitted to liking him, she called him my "sexy Stabler." One time she accidentally called him that, while he was standing right by us. We went out for a drink after work and right in front of him she said it. I just blushed and told him she was wasted, and of course she objected making me feel even more stupid. He didn't understand anything though, just thought she was crazy. I didn't disagree.
"Just go give Cragen the damn search warrant." I mumbled walking away. She raised her eyebrows but did as told.
I sat at my desk and emptied all the crap from my drawers on top. This was going to take forever to go through. Elliot didn't say anything and neither did I. So we sat in silence for about 5 minutes then Novak came over.
"Hey El."
"Hi." He muttered. It was quiet for a minute before she finally noticed something was wrong.
"Oh I see you two are fighting," She crossed her arms and looked over at my partner. "What the hell did you do Stabler?"
"Shut up Novak." He growled.
"Ah, I can see you must have really screwed up."
"I don't believe this involves you Casey."
"Im her best friend, I know everything. And trust me, I do know everything…" She shot him a wicked grin and I looked up in horror.
"Casey!" I exclaimed.
"Alright, alright. I'll shut up."
"Thank freakin God." Elliot mumbled.
"Oh shut up Stabler, you know you like me. Anyway, what time do you want to go shopping tonight?"
"As soon as you're done."
"Okay, I'll text you. I better go before Jack has my ass. See ya Liv, bye Elliot."
"Bye counselor," He said as she left. As soon as the elevator door close he looked up at me. "You're going out tonight?"
"Just so I can tell her about my PCOS. It wont be too long, because we have to talk. So don't even tell me your sorry now, there'll be time for that later." I gave him a small smile so he knew I wasn't extremely mad at him.
We were making small conversation, not really talking about anything in particular.
"Spring cleaning in the middle of October? I think you're a little late Livy."
"Munch! God, you scared me!" I exclaimed. Fin came up behind him.
"Don't worry baby girl, he scares all of us." Well all laughed, except Munch who pretended to be hurt.
"And you're the one who's a little late. It's not the middle of October, Halloween's in 4 days. And I'm not spring cleaning."
"Then what are you doing?" He eyed me over his glasses. I sighed and spun my chair to face them.
"Guys, I quit."
"Why?" Fin imeadetly questioned.
"I couldn't deal with it anymore. I cant handle it anymore."
No one said anything for a couple minutes. Munch and Fin sat down and we all pretended to be busy with something.
"So you're really doing it?" Munch asked, breaking the tense awkward silence.
"Yup." I said, breathing a sigh of relief, I was almost done cleaning out my desk. Just the top. Elliot shot me a sad smile and I felt a little guilty. But it was quickly gone, I had no reason to.
I decided that it was really weird that I went from bold to italics so Im just gona stick to bold . I think its about time to end the story, probably one more chapter from each of their p.o.v's then the epilogue. Btw, the whole thing Liv told Cragen about the case pushing her to edge, I thought was pretty creative :). My lang arts teacher would've liked it. Of course thats just me (the chick who stays up till 4AM on fanfic) and him (hes pretty cool, but he says "dude" and "okay" a lot. And when he gets really mad, its so scary you wana pee your pants. But he only did that like 3 times last year.) So yeah.
-JustAGirlIGuess
