Chapter 12

Tamara walked into the CIA Headquarters. Sometimes, she wondered why she bothered; sometimes, she wondered why Levi bothered to let her in. It wasn't as though she had to be here...but there was something between them that not even the CIA had managed to kill...and that kept her coming here and Levi letting her in.

As she walked through the halls to the office, she wondered that she felt so easy about it. The assistant looked at her nervously and let her into the office. The door closed, she walked over to the desk.

Everything that her life had been before this office had come into their lives... Tamara sat down on Levi's chair and looked at the world from that perspective. She remembered how blunt Levi had been about what his promotions would mean for them, for their family. She remembered how their marriage had fallen apart as Levi had become more and more closed off from her.

...and she remembered the last-minute deal they had made.

"For the sake of who you used to be, Levi."

That same smile that had taken the place of a real expression.

"So...you want a divorce but you can't really leave me? That's not very logical, you know," he said.

"Levi, I love the man you were. I can't love the man standing in front of me, now."

"I know."

"But I'll give you a chance...when this place isn't your life."

"What makes you think I'll live that long?"

Tamara actually smiled. "Because you live through everything, Levi."

Carew smiled back, but expressed nothing with the smile.

"And you think it would be worth it?"

"Yes. If you do."

"It's an interesting experiment, but if you choose to remarry, no hard feelings."

Life had led to the death of their son and now the possible loss of Brianna. Tamara hated the director of the CIA and all he'd taken from her, but she couldn't help hoping that the man she'd married still existed inside somewhere.

But even if he didn't, she prayed that she'd get her daughter back, at least. Brianna had become harder ever since Quinn had been killed, but she was still human.

She sat in Levi's chair for an hour. Alone.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

The day passed too quickly. After the sun set, Tim leaned out of the window and looked down at the empty street below him. As he sat there, waiting for the dangerous stuff to begin, his mind went back to the events that had thrown him onto the course his life had traveled now. Those two months that had left him hating himself and wishing for an escape of some kind. He had been so sure that there was nothing that could save him. Hit after hit had driven him lower and lower until he was completely convinced that there was nothing for him.

Now, he had the hope that he'd lacked...but his life could be on the line yet again.

Will I ever be able to get off this roller coaster? Tim thought to himself.

Whether the answer was yes or no, there was one thing, and it had been a constant in every stage of his life the last few years.

"I want to live through this," he whispered aloud.

No matter what had happened to him, what he'd been forced to do, he had wanted to survive it. Now was no exception. He wanted to survive this, get rid of his obligation to the CIA and live his life.

A life that had become, more and more, defined by what he could do. Tim could admit that he was unlikely to get back to the simple, ordinary life he'd led before all this started. The difference was that he could accept that. As long as he could control his own life to some degree, he could deal with the idea.

He turned his mind back on the smartdust. He tried to think about how this was going to work out. Carew clearly had a plan in mind, but the problem that Tim could see was the small numbers. Two, even three if Ray was with them, didn't seem like enough to sneak into a base, rescue or kill someone and destroy all their work.

"Tim."

Tim suppressed a wince. He still didn't like Carew using his first name. It implied a level of familiarity that Tim had tried to prevent. He turned around.

"I don't like this," Tim said.

"What don't you like?" Carew asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Just the two of us invading a base with who knows how many people there? I can't run unless it's really necessary. There's just you."

"It won't be just the two of us unless something goes wrong."

"Ray?"

"No. Ray has other things to do. He's going to get us out of Sana'a and on our way."

"Then, who?"

"A local who knows his way around and doesn't like these people making trouble for the local population. He's worth ten of anyone else."

"Where is he?"

"Recon at Zamakh. We're supposed to rendezvous with him once we figure out what's going on with this other group. If they're a wild goose chase, we leave them and go on our way."

"And if they are a part of it and they know about us?"

Carew smiled.

"Then, you'll get to see just how well your shoes are padded."

"No amount of padding is going to keep my feet from giving out if I run too much," Tim said. "You said you didn't want me for my physical prowess. If that's the case, then, you'd better be ready for the fact that I'm not up to par."

"I'm ready for that."

"I still don't like the idea of following this other group. If we know that Zamakh is the location, then, why don't we just go there?" Tim asked, but then, he cocked his head to the side. "It's because you think Bri might be with them, isn't it."

Carew nodded.

"Ray did get some indication that there is a woman with them. It's hard to say whether or not it's genuine and, if it is, if it's Bri. We're going to find out, and if there's nothing to it, we go on to Zamakh. Either way, we'll be out of Sana'a and beyond the checkpoints. It will be much easier to move on to Zamakh without attention once we're out of the city."

"How long will Ray stay with us?"

"Long enough to ascertain the nature of this group. Then, he'll be about his own business and you and I will head to the rendezvous."

Tim looked at him for a long moment.

"I still don't like this, but fine."

He turned back to his bag and started to repack it. He had a feeling that things were going to get started sooner rather than later.

"Woodrow was right about you."

Tim straightened and turned back. He was surprised to see a quirk of a genuine smile on Carew's face.

"What do you mean?"

"You are ready. Whatever other problems you have, you've resolved this situation with yourself. You won't crack under that weight. I have to admit that I didn't think you could do it. Other people, more experienced agents, have not managed what you have managed to do."

Tim raised an eyebrow, and Carew's smile widened.

"You should know well enough by now that I don't lie to make people feel better."

"Sometimes, I wonder if you've spent your whole life being honest so that you can tell one whopper that everyone will believe."

Carew chuckled...but he didn't answer.

Tim rolled his eyes and turned back to his bag. He had a change of clothes, but he wasn't sure if he'd be able to use them. They were packed as tightly as possible. He had the phone strapped to his waist under his clothes. He also had a knife strapped to his back. It was invisible under his clothes. He hoped he didn't have to use it. He had a gun, and he had the electronics. All in all, the bag was as light as he could make it.

...until Ray came, at least.

While he waited, he read through the Arabic phrases that Ray had been trying to teach him, and his mind kept wandering back to this group that had so conveniently showed up in Sana'a. He couldn't help but feel uncomfortable about it. His mind also wandered to the smartdust as well. This felt like a strange dichotomy of targets. Ideally, of course, Bri would be in the same place the lab or whatever was...but if she was with this group, it might be an attempt to divide their attention, give them a chance to move the lab somewhere else.

Bri was the last person he wanted to have to rescue. ...well, the second to last. He really hoped that saving Carew wasn't a necessity, either. He'd do it, but it would be one of those situations where he would want to leave them, and he'd know it was wrong. Besides that, though, while Carew would never say so, he clearly wanted to save his daughter, even if he wouldn't put her first.

Now that the moment was coming, Tim just wished that they'd get started. It was hard to wait.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

Dr. Hicks was sitting at his desk near the end of the day when there was a knock on his door. He smiled, knowing who this likely was.

"Come in."

The door opened.

"Dr. Hicks."

"Acting Director Morgan," Dr. Hicks said. "I hope you don't mind if I stay seated. My feet are hurting today."

"I don't mind."

"Have a seat."

Roy sat down across from him, and Dr. Hicks could tell he was evaluating.

"To say that I was surprised at your call is the understatement of the decade."

"I figured."

"What has brought about your curiosity about the current status of Director Carew?"

Dr. Hicks smiled at the careful wording. He leaned forward and decided to throw caution to the winds.

"I know that he wasn't in the car accident. I know he wasn't in the car at all, and that it was by design."

Now, Roy's surprise showed on his face. He looked around the room, only with his eyes.

"I assure you, Director Morgan that this office is extremely secure. It has to be because of the work I do."

"So...why bring it up? You must know the risk."

"I do, but I have a reason for it. Will you listen?"

There was a moment of silence as Roy decided. Choosing to listen was a tacit agreement to answer questions. They both knew it.

"Yes, I'll listen...as long as you understand that there are some things I won't say."

Dr. Hicks smiled.

"Director Carew is training you well, I see."

Roy smiled back and didn't respond. He just waited.

"I won't ask. I know that Director Carew is correcting a mistake he made when he saved my life thirty years ago. I know that much. I know, also, that he has taken Tim McGee with him, and I'm sure you know who that is. What I don't know is where they are. Tim McGee's friends are concerned that if things go wrong, they'll have no backup."

"They won't," Roy said.

"Here is my question. Do you know where they are?"

"No."

He didn't even blink.

"Now, here is the really strange question."

Roy raised an eyebrow.

"If it happened that Tim's friends were able to find out where to go, would you be willing to provide...clandestine transportation to them?"

"I...didn't think you could possibly surprise me any more than you already had just by contacting me," Roy said, carefully. "You're treading on very dangerous ground, Dr. Hicks."

"I understand that, but I was asked to see how far it might be possible to go, and so I'm doing that. I'm not a real player in this game. I just get to kibbitz every so often."

"I'm not even sure I know who the real players are," Roy muttered, almost to himself. "Dr. Hicks, it would be foolish of me to commit myself one way or the other in this situation. However...should this become more than mere conjecture..." He pulled out a card and then wrote on it. "Call me."

Dr. Hicks took the card and saw a phone number written on it. It wasn't his office number.

"Please, don't share that out...and it would help if you'd be willing to forget it after this situation passes."

"Understood."

"Good. Was that everything?"

"Yes, thanks for your time."

Roy just nodded. He stood and left the office without another word.

Well, that had done more than Dr. Hicks thought it would do. It appeared he had a little more pull than he had thought he did.