Kara's service record is posted over on 'Silhouettes'. (My other 'story'. Ch.6, 'Records'.)

Another chapter of primarily dialogue. The visit to the Citadel is already having consequences. Kara reveals another side of herself.

The bit with Wrex... I had not intended to do any of the companion quests. Particularly with the time factor, I couldn't justify having the Normandy flying all over the Galaxy. Still, the new additions to the crew provided me with an opportunity which, while continuing my divergence from cannon, should make things easier.

Who wants to write cannon anyway? We all know how that went. And how it ended.


CHAPTER TWELVE
Conflict

Orlanis' team consisted of three Turians, one of them female, and two Asari. Sparatus had not exaggerated their skills, either. Lixandris Tacallus and Auran Actus were proficient snipers, and Auran a rare Turian biotic, though not as powerful as her Asari teammates. Valaris Marasus and Yana Rasal provided the team's front-line power, with Kaliran Sallar as biotic support. They had a reputation for efficiently clearing out entrenched gangs, some of which had equipment and leadership support from mercenary groups. They were not, however, universally pleased at their new assignment.

Kara did not consider it a surprise, or out of line. She had almost two weeks to win them over, however, starting with the their commander. She set down the datapad as the door chime sounded. She had left the team in the cargo bay, sorting out their gear as the Normandy departed. They were cruising through the first relay-link now, at speeds of over four hundred light-years per hour. It was a staggering thing to consider. They could cross most of the galaxy in ten days, ten thousand light-years at a jump. Without the relays, there would be no galactic civilization, and that raised questions.

Not to be answered now, though. She opened the door, smiling at her Turian guest. "Come in, Orlanis. Sit."

Orlanis accepted the chair, while Kara returned to her seat on the bed. Another meter of space along the port hull, she thought, and the room would have fit another chair, for a slightly less informal conversation. Considering it was one of the few places she could consistently find privacy, it would've been nice. "Are you going to explain what this is about, Shepard? I hate working in the dark."

"We're providing aid to an STG team on a remote garden world. I expect our opposition to be mainly Geth, with some mercenary support. We'll sort out any further objectives when we arrive."

"That's not much to go on," Orlanis snorted.

Kara shrugged. "No, but that's the life of Spectre. You go in hot, and work things out on the ground. The STG should be able to provide us with more information when we arrive."

"Geth. I assume this has something to do with the attack on Eden Prime, and with Garrus here, it must involve Saren, as well," the Turian said. Her eyes had a deep golden color, fixed steadily on Kara's. "Am I right?"

"Yes. We may not catch Saren himself, but I'm hoping for information on something called the Conduit, possibly a Prothean artifact, and the Reapers."

"Now tell me why I should trust you to lead us," Orlanis demanded.

Kara sighed. She had rarely heard a more impossible request, but perhaps that was an Asari attitude. Humans trusted words, often too easily; and Turians trusted the chain of command. Certainly she had no other answer to give. "What kind of answer would you accept?"

Orlanis stared at her, clearly not impressed.

"Because you were ordered to?" she tried.

"That is a Turian answer; you are not," came Orlanis' dismissive reply. She was not entirely correct. Orders had justified their share of crimes on Earth, just as they had on Palaven.

"Because I told you to?"

Orlanis' expression darkened. "Do you take me for a fool?"

"I think you take me for one," Kara said quietly. "We both know that nothing I say here will make you trust me."

"I need to know you won't sacrifice my team to save your worthless marines, like that sorry excuse for an officer Harken tried to do. Pallin would have had him spaced, if not for that odious ambassador of yours whining to the Council about how important he was."

"Ah," Kara muttered. A run-in with humanity's corrupt CSec officer, and Udina's embarrassing defense of him, would damage anyone opinion of her species. He had represented her species to the Citadel's residents for a score of years, and though he was gone now, it was far too late. "I met him."

"I heard," Orlanis responded, her tone approving for once.

Kara wondered how far news of that incident had gotten. If Harken's reputation was as widespread as rumor made it, half the station had probably heard by now. "My service record is in the Normandy's computer," she said, linking to and sending the file from her omnitool. "It might answer some of your doubts."

"I'll look through it," the Turian agreed, accepting the transfer, and browsing through it on her own device's holographic display.

Kara leaned forward, recapturing Orlanis' attention. "I'd rather have your cooperation than your obedience, Orlanis. When we get to Virmire, you'll be fully included in all tactical decisions. Until then, I'd like you to take over as marine commander from Lieutenant Alenko."

Orlanis nodded, her short crests catching the overhead light. She knew her team better than anyone else, and it only made sense for her to direct their use. "I'll make sure we're ready for anything, Captain," she said, standing and opening the door.

The Turians were a beautiful species, tall and swift, bright-eyed, their hard crests like crowns; but not attractive to Kara's human sensibilities. Their militaristic culture had many similarities to the worst periods of Earth history, but they lacked the tolerance for torture and war profiteering that had characterized every human empire. However, they had even less concern for civilian casualties.

"Call me Kara, Orlanis."


Silence. Kara breathed it in with the air, her thoughts empty as her mind and body worked, as a unified whole through the vanan ithal, the founding stone; the basic forms through which young Asari learned to control their bodies and their biotics, and which formed the basis for their martial arts. She found them relaxing, a diversion, always necessary on a crowded ship. They were also good exercise.

The Normandy was six hours out from the Citadel, putting ship time at around twenty-two hundred. Those crew who weren't currently on duty or asleep were relaxing in whatever way they could, as they awaiting their turn in the sleeper pods that took the place of bunks. The training room was empty, except for her.

She heard the door open, a quiet hum of hydraulics and motors. She recognized the steady footfalls that crossed the floor in their officer's boots. She did not react as they paused, half a meter from her, spread in a combat stance. She didn't want this, not now. Not ever.

Forcing herself to stay calm, Kara carried her movements through to their conclusion and paused for a deep breath before opening her eyes.

Brynja's expression was mixed. Her blue eyes held pain, while her set jaw and the flat line of her lips showed anger. She held her posture awkwardly, as someone who had trained, but never took the time to excel.

Kara adopted a defensive posture, turning aside the blond's punches without retaliating. They were formulaic, precise, enhancing her impression of the fight as a choreographed dance. "You're angry. Why?"

"You don't know?" Brynja demanded, still pressing her attack.

Kara frowned. She was beginning to, and it worried her. "I'm asking."

"Fuck you," Brynja snapped.

The outburst was as much frustration as anger, Kara guessed, but it still surprised her. Brynja took advantage of the opening, executing a throw that laid her out on her back. She should have anticipated the move. She rolled to her feet.

"I'm not guessing, Brynja. Tell me."

Brynja dropped her arms, and turned away. "I had this silly idea that you were interested in me, but you didn't even notice me, did you?"

No, she hadn't, but she hadn't wanted to, and that could have a powerful influence on perceptions. Even thinking back she could see the details, and make the connections she had missed. She had unconsciously avoided doing so, and her own actions, in response, were too unguarded, encouraging the younger women.

"Brynja I can't, don't you see?"

Brynja laughed, bitterly. "If I were purple, I'd be in your bed by now."

Kara lifted Brynja in a biotic field, and threw the protesting blond against the padded wall. The suggestion angered her not just because her sexual activities weren't anyone's business but hers and her partners, but because it implied she'd treat an Asari under her command worse than she would a human. "I don't answer to you."

"Let me down. Now!" Brynja demanded. Kara let her sink to her feet, but still held her firmly in place. She struggled, but it was as useless as trying to jump out of a gravity well.

"Do you think this is easy for me? To know that Liara, and now you, want something from me that I can't let myself give?" she sighed, and relaxed her concentration. The field dissipated quickly. She'd never been able to sustain anger, not even towards people she disliked.

"Why not? You trust me with your life every day. Why can't you trust me to share it?" Brynja pressed. She deserved an answer, at least.

The Alliance's policy on fraternization was not in place just to protect senior officers from compromising their judgement. It also protected junior officers and crew from abuse by their superiors. A captain's authority had to stop somewhere, and certainly did not include seducing her crew.

Kara struggled to find the right words. She trusted Brynja, but did not entirely trust herself. If she pushed for too much, as she knew that sometimes she did, would the young blond have the courage to refuse? She couldn't let herself take that risk. She had seen it before; women and men who felt violated by superior officers, but feared to use their right to say no. Right now, severed from even the possibility of protection from a higher authority, she felt it even more important to hold back. "I trust you, Brynja. I don't trust myself."

"Well, fine. Forget it," Brynja snorted. She started to turn away, but stopped. When she spoke again, her voice was sharply angry. "Well, no. It is me you don't trust, because no silly young ensign could possibly resist the charms of the great Kara Shepard. If I think you're brilliant and amazing and beautiful, it can only be because of some special charisma, not because you are all those things."

She shook her head. "Maybe you're just the most brilliant fool I've ever met," she continued, her voice less harsh, but more cutting, "I don't know. Maybe you're just a self-righteous ass. I do know that if you really trusted me, you'd give me an answer. 'Yes, Brynja, I like you. Let's give it a try.' Even, 'I'm just not interested,' would be honest. You won't even give me that, just some cowardly, foolish gibberish about not trusting yourself."

"I..." Kara hesitated, feeling more uncertain than she had in years, and wounded too. Hiding in the dark; but Kara Shepard never hid from anything. She studied it, understood it, and faced it down.

Brynja was undoubtedly brilliant, the best in her class, and not easily intimidated. A boldness that hinted, through her stories, at conquered introversion. She might reach, unthinking, for what she wanted, as much out of fear of lost opportunity than any deeper feeling. Lúcía represented a lost chance that Brynja would never stop regretting. Now, between the sight of Kara with Elessa, and her fear of Liara's intentions, she must have seen another chance slipping away, and rushed to take it.

Kara took a deep breath. "I do trust you, Brynja, and you're right; I am afraid. I like you, but no more; and I can't deal with more right now. I've got to run a frigate with half-crew; I spend half my time doing system maintenance, and the other half solving the personal issues of what few people I have left. In two weeks, I may have to infiltrate a Geth base with the help of a Turian officer who doesn't trust humans, and an STG captain who won't trust me either. What I need from you is friendship, not romance, and is that really asking too much?"

The young blond hunched her shoulders, her eyes falling. "No. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Kara smiled softly. "Not for being honest."


It wasn't until mid afternoon the next day that Kara found time to speak with Ashley. The demands on her time did not revolve around critical decisions, as romanticism would have it, but more and more required her to keep the peace amongst the crew, in addition to the mass of STG report forwarded to her. She hoped things would settle in a few days.

She found the gunnery chief in the mess, cradling a cup of hot coffee between her hands. The lingering side effects of a night of drinking had passed, when Kara sat down across from her.

"Ashley," Kara began quietly. "Why are you here?"

"Ma'am?" Williams asked, looking up from her drink. Her face looked gaunt, her eyes hollow. She was still having the dreams from Eden Prime.

"How are you feeling?" Kara tried. It was a better place to start from, anyway.

"Like hell, ma'am."

As an answer, it had the benefit of succinctness. Kara let the silence between them grow, hoping Ashley would choose to fill it without more prompting.

The black-haired marine sighed. "Things were bad after you left. The Alliance wanted to know why we let you take the ship. Admiral Mikhailovitch was the worst, demanding to know everything about 'Shepard's aliens'. Admiral Hackett ordered us all brought to Arcturus station for interrogation, including Captain Anderson.

"The Captain tried to defend the rest of us, so they started questioning him. You had resigned, they said, and should never had been allowed back onboard the Normandy. He shouldn't have let you bring aliens aboard. Even that he shouldn't have left the ship. I don't think he did anything wrong. How would he have known what you were planning?"

"Because I told him," Kara said. Just as she'd told Ashley. They had both chosen not to organize against her. "What about you?"

"They called it 'the Second Williams' Surrender.' Admiral Hackett ordered a tribunal to decide our fates. My father always said a Williams had to perform at a hundred and ten percent, and dammit I tried, but even that wasn't good enough. They pinned the loss of the garrison at Eden Prime on me, and said I could either resign or be court-martialed."

"I'm sorry," Kara sighed. She hadn't expected the Alliance to treat her former crew like criminals. Should they have turned on their fellow officers and crew, and tried to hold the ship by force? Yes, according to military law. Her appeals to the higher authority of the Council should have been ignored.

"No, you're not," Ashley snorted.

Kara laid her hand on Ashley's. She had expected reprimands, as the Alliance attempted to assert that its authority superseded that of a Spectre. She should have seen that General Williams' granddaughter would be especially vulnerable to charges of surrendering to alien authority, but there was nothing she could have done.

"You are. Okay," Ashley said, her eyes falling back to her cup. "I'm just glad my father didn't live to see it. He always said I'd break the Williams' curse."

"What were you doing on the Citadel?"

"I don't know. The nightmares came back after I resigned. I'd see the broken bodies of my men, and they'd accuse me of surrendering to the Geth."

"Ash, look at me," Kara commanded. The marine's brown eyes rose, shimmering with unshed tears. It was easy to see survival as a sign of failure, even when those around you were full of praise. Kara had fought on at Elysium, even after her entire squad had died, and all she could think of, when the battle had ended, was her failure to save them. "You did the right thing, just like your grandfather. His surrender saved a hundred thousand lives. Your survival helped me save Eden Prime. It isn't much comfort, but you have to believe it."

Ashley nodded. "I'll try, ma'am."

"We're not military, Ash. Use my name."

"Yes, ma'am. Kara. Sorry," the marine muttered, wiping the moisture from her eyes. "After I resigned, I couldn't stay on Arcturus Station, and I couldn't bear to face my mother and sisters. They must think I'm a traitor and a coward. I haven't even watched the vids they sent. I guess I ran away, but I'm a soldier. I don't know how to do anything else.

"I was on the Citadel for two weeks, I think, when I got a note from Captain Anderson. It just said that the Normandy had docked at the Citadel. I know you don't have much reason to trust me, but-"

"Ash," Kara interrupted, "it's fine. Welcome back."

Ashley's tense expression eased, a faint smile turning the corners of her mouth. "Thank you, ma'am. I thought you'd throw me in the brig."

"We don't have a brig. I could try locking you in a sleeper pod," Kara said dryly.

"Ma'am? Kara. I'm sorry, Kara."

"That's better," Kara smiled. "You've been through enough. You don't need me doubting you."

"Thank you. I'll be ready whenever you need me," Ashley said, rising to her feet.

Kara leaned back in her chair. "Orlanis is in command of the Normandy's marine contingent. You'll report to her."


"Shepard," Wrex demanded angrily. "Get her off of me."

The Krogan Battlemaster struggled impotently against the powerful biotics of Kaliran Sallar. Kara had anticipated tension between him and the Turians. Wrex usually kept his temper in check, preferring angry bluster to the real thing when it could get him the same result, but the two species had old grudges that had yet to be resolved. She only wished he had better timing, as they were close to Virmire and had little time for resolution. "I'll see to him, Kaliran. Why don't you check on Auran."

The well-trained Asari commando nodded, releasing the Krogan, though she did not turn her back on him as she left the training room. The Turian female had already been removed to the sickbay, though her injuries had appeared mild.

Kara sighed, and fixed the Wrex with a tired glare. "Well?"

"I told you about my father, Shepard. He tried to kill me because I saw what the Genophage had done to our people. It left us without hope, so we left Tuchanka, and became mercenaries and hired killers, condemning our entire race to a slow death, at a time when we needed to stop and rebuild.

"After I killed my father, my grandfather charged me with recovering our family armor. Its archaic crap by now, but it's ours. A Turian named Tonn Actus has it. He's scum, a pirate and a profiteer who collects artifacts from the Krogan Rebellions. Artifacts stolen from my people."

Wrex had, Kara assumed, concluded that Auran Actus was a relative of Tonn Actus. The Turian's file might have that information, but she had been more concerned with skill and attitude than heritage. "That's hardly a reason to assault Auran."

"She's his daughter."

Kara frowned. "Find a better reason."

"She knows where he's hiding," Wrex growled.

"That's no excuse. You can either put aside your vendetta, or get off my ship. I don't have time for it," Kara stated, staring at him coldly.

"Fine, Shepard," Wrex muttered, shaking his wide head. Where the Turians were tall and predatory, Krogan were squat and defensive, with the side-set eyes characteristic of prey-species on Earth. Life on their homeworld of Tuchanka was, they claimed, a constant struggle, but little evidence had survived the destruction of their world by the pointless fury of nuclear war. "I'll beat it out of her after we stop Saren."

"Take some advice, Wrex," Kara sighed. "Try diplomacy. The Krogan proclivity toward endless posturing has never helped your people."

Wrex laughed. "You really think she'd help a Krogan? Against her own father?"

"You won't find out using threats," Kara pointed out. "Would it be so bad if you didn't have to kill anyone, or is that not the Krogan way?"

"You can be an insulting pyjak, Shepard. You're lucky I'm so forgiving," he growled.

Kara shrugged. "You can't intimidate me. Try something different."

"Dammit, Shepard, fine. I'll try it your way," Wrex grumbled, "but it had better work."

"Good," Kara smiled. "Let me know if you need my help."


The review button is just below. If you're enjoying this story, let me know.