A/N: Ok sorry for the long delay had a bad case of….don't wanna type syndrome lol. Thanks for being patient please enjoy!!
Chatper 11 Lying in his arms
I let Tamaki drive me home. I let him hold my hand in the car, and I let him walk me to the door. He seemed happy but distracted as well. Maybe even confused. But I was trying to act like girlfriend, maybe that was what was confusing him. I'd never let him be close and friendly with me. Not this much of the time at least. I would always fend off some of his approaches letting him have a certain amount of time. But now I wouldn't let him leave my side.
"Well I'll be back in a few hours to pick you up." He leaned to kiss my cheek but I pulled back. He straightened a slight pout forming on his lips.
"No, please stay." I pleaded grabbing his hand as I opened my door. He was surprised and stood there for a moment.
"But…" His head twisted to the side watching me as if I had just said the strangest thing in the world.
"Don't you want to get your stuff together for the trip?" He said slowly, carefully almost.
"Yes, I want you to stay with me." My voice, I hoped, wasn't shaking like the rest of my insides. I was in shock still but it was wearing off. I didn't have the desire to be alone at the moment. I knew I'd break down and never be put back together. I could already feel the numbness of pain creeping up my legs and my arms. Tamaki was a comfort to me even if I was lying to him.
"Please, Tamaki." That seemed to do it. He smiled happily and he pulled me inside.
"How about this outfit Haruhi?" Tamaki chimed holding up a pretty sun dress my father had picked up for me. I sighed, since that was the fifth dress he'd held up.
"Alright." I gave in, watching him cheer and pack the dress away. I sat on the bed watching him. He asked before placing anything in the suitcase but he seemed to be enjoying the freedom of picking my outfits.
"I'll be right back." I got up when I heard the phone.
"Hurry back my dear!" Tamaki called and I groaned knowing there were going to be a few more dresses I wouldn't know about till I opened the suitcase again.
I went out in the living room feeling still very much cold as I entered the atmosphere of alones. Tamaki's cheerful presence had kept my at least room temperature and held back the pain but now it was spreading through my system again.
The phone rang again just as I reached for it. Looking at the caller ID I froze. It was Kyouya's number. My heart screamed that I answer it and talk to him, but my mind refused to give the order. It was concentrating on the hurt and suffered he'd inflicted on me while my heart was thinking of his voice. Both wanted something different and neither could make my fingers move before the phone stopped ringing.
"Who was it Haruhi?" Tamaki asked placing a few shirts into the suitcase. I nodded approving of a shirt he held up as I walked.
"I didn't answer it." I said softly going over to him.
"Haruhi?" I moved in front of him so he couldn't get into my closet anymore. I looked up at him knowing by big brown eyes were filled with grief. His deep blue eyes looked back concerned.
"What's wrong?" He whispered placing both hands on my face. The flesh was warm against my cheeks.
"Nothing. Just…hold me please." I whispered. He didn't hesitate to wrap his arms around me and pull me close. I stayed there against his chest fighting with the tears as he held me close.
"I love you Haruhi." He whispered gently running his hand up and down my back like he knew I was about to break into tears.
"I…I love you too." I whispered feeling my voice break after the last word. I held my tongue after that knowing I wouldn't be able to keep my tears back.
Here I was cradled loving in Tamaki's arms knowing he'd never do anything to hurt me, knowing he loved me and all I could think about was Kyouya. Why was I lying to Tamak? Why was I lying in his arms when they surrounded me in such a bubble of protection? Was I so willing to hurt him? I didn't deserve him. I didn't deserve anything. I felt so miserable at that moment I thought I would die.
Kyouya I love you! Why did you leave?
A/N: Ok it's a short chapter but just wait promise it will be up shortly :D thanks for all the patience I love you guys to pieces!! Don't forget to review purrrty please :D And I have polls on my home page if you'd like to vote Thank you again !!
