If things were different.
CHAPTER 12; Not Coming Home
"Alice?"
"Mmhmm, what is it, Bella?" she paused waiting for me to reply.
I took a deep breath, "Alice, I'm not coming home."
"What are you talking about? Of course you're coming home. We've been planning this since you came here!"
"I'm talking about how it doesn't feel right. I feel like a third wheel."
"What on earth are you talking about?" she looked stunned.
"You and Jasper, Rose and Emmett. You can go on double dates together and even though you'd say it wouldn't be weird if I tagged along, it would be. And don't even think about saying I could find someone to bring along, because I won't."
"Don't talk rubbish, you will find someone. Or they'll find you," she looked to the others, still playing, their game having evolved into piggy in the middle.
I sighed as I focused my own gaze on Edward. His face animated, waving at Emmett like one of those cartoon characters just as they've run off a cliff and they're waiting in suspense for gravity to pull them down.
"What are you thinking?"
"Wuhh? Me?" I mumbled, snatched from my daydream.
"Who else? Hey sand, what's on your mind?" Alice replied, sarcasm dripping like chocolate sauce on one of Emmett's ice-creams.
"So beautiful."
"What is?" Alice followed my gaze, "oh."
"Tell me about it," I groaned.
"Well, you could always try it," she suggested. I turned my head towards her and glared.
"Urgh. I don't know why I even tell you these things! All you do is make stupid impossible suggestions. Especially ones I already crossed off a short list of what I could do."
"What else was on this list?"
"There's being proactive, being subtle, being aggressive, get rid of it, or, my favourite, do nothing," I said, counting down the options on my fingers, when I got to the fifth and final option, I put my hand right in her face.
"And which are you going to do?"
"I'm leaning towards get rid of it, but I tried, it just gets worse. So I'm admiring from afar. It's going to be uncomfortable anyway, no matter what I do," I sighed, raising my eyes to the sky, silently praying for some sort of miracle.
"Actually, I know someone else with the same problem," she mumbled.
"Really? Who?" I asked, out of courtesy rather than interest.
"Just some guy..." she paused, looking towards the volley-ballers, "he's on this beach actually."
"Alice, that's not funny, and you know it."
"It wasn't meant to be funny. It's the truth. I wasn't supposed to tell anyone especially not you, I didn't tell you, so I kept my promise didn't I?"
"Fuck off," I stood up. "This isn't a joke you know?"
She jumped up, trying to look me in the eyes, but I just looked over her head.
"Bella, I'm being serious. Edward is in love with you."
"It's not getting any funnier," I said, getting increasingly pissed at the hyperactive pixie.
"Oh for the love of clothes! EDWARD?" she yelled.
The whole beached turned to look at us, including Edward, who started to run towards us. I went the colour of beetroot, not good.
He arrived, not even out of breath. God, I wish I could do that.
"Edward?"
"Alice?"
"Do you, or do you not love Bella?" Alice asked, with all the sincerity she would ever own.
His eyes widened with fear, "I..I, Alice, what have you been saying?"
"See Bella, he'd protest if he didn't. You know that," she blurted
"Alice!" Edward whispered, fear filling his eyes.
"Bella, meet Edward, he's in love with you. Edward, this is Bella, she's head over heals for you. Hope you're happy together!" she smiled widely, and skipped towards the others, who'd stopped their game until Edward came back.
Fuck.
"Fuuuuuuuuuck... bloody pixie... stupid me... why?" Edward cursed under his breath.
"I...I don't know w-what t-to-to say," I stuttered to the sand curling between my toes. I looked up slowly, seeing a pair of emerald green orbs staring down into my murky brown eyes. God, you're so pretty.
"Thank you?" he smiled, sort of crooked, his tongue stopping between his teeth slightly before he brought me back to reality by biting his lip.
Crap. "I didn't say that out loud did I?" I brought my palm to my face, covering my eyes, and the worst of my blush. I felt a warm hand, tugging lightly at the hand on my face, and another encasing the one I'd wrapped around my waist.
"Don't cover your face, that's the only thing that you do that never fails to bug me."
"You're hands are warm."
"Sorry," he said, as he pulled them away, slowly but surely.
"No don't," I blurted as I grabbed them back, "I like it."
"So do I," he smiled, putting his fingers through mine.
"KISS HER ALREADY DICKHEAD!" Emmett yelled.
Edward parted one of our intertwined hands and gave Emmett a cute face and a wave, effectively telling him to piss off. He leant down, staring into my eyes.
"I don't understand. You… love me?" I asked insecurely.
"Silly Bella, how could I not? After you left, I realised what a truly amazing, beautiful person you are, how could I not fall in love with you? You fascinate me. You never do what I expect you to do and usually I can read people so easily but you always take me by surprise. One of the reasons I came with Alice, early, was to see if being together hurt less. It did," he smiled, God, I love him.
"Really?" I was still in a state of shock.
"Yes, really, I've been in love with you for ages and I tried to tell myself over and over how wrong it was but I can't fight it anymore."
"I love you too," I murmured softly.
The smile he gave me was amazing, it dazzled me and rendered me speechless. His face was glorious as he took my face between his hands and brushed his warm, soft lips against mine. I smelled him, amazing and warm. I couldn't help but kiss him back, pulling myself closer to him every time he moved his lips against mine.
"I love you, Bella," he murmured in my ear while planting another kiss on my lips.
Then he pulled away and released all of me but my right hand and he started rubbing circles along the back of that hand, it left a trail of goosebumps, even though his fingers were the same temperature as mine.
"Urm, by the car...?" I started.
"Oh, that? I thought I'd tell you then, but it seemed really wrong, and I never would've thought you'd love me back, even half as much as I love you."
"Edward," I said, sternly – he gave me a worried look, "I love you beyond what is even comprehensible to the matters of our tiny human brains. How could you possibly love me any more than that?"
He paused, in thought.
"Thought so."
"No," he said finally. "My world revolves around you, you're all I've even thought about since I knew. We were in the cafeteria last week and I they had a special strawberries and cream dessert on. I bought one, not even realising why until we sat down at our table..."
He stopped, "Why? I don't understand?"
"I got it because you always smell like strawberries and I know it's one of your favourites," he smiled down at me. I grinned back, you know me too well.
"I'm beginning to think so too," he laughed.
"What? Oh... I said that out loud again? Maaaan, I'm so going to have to work on that."
"No, don't," Edward chuckled. "It's incredibly adorable. Plus it lets me know what you're thinking."
"Oh well it's okay if I just blurt out that I think you're damn fuckinghot, and I love you more than my life, in front of our siblings, eh?"
"Maybe not," he grinned.
"Knew, you'd appreciate that. I just gave your ego a huge boost didn't I?" I smiled.
"You sure did!"
I laughed at his huge grin, Emmett sized.
"I love you."
"I love you more."
"Oh no you didn't!" he said, picking me up, as if I weighed 10 pounds, not 110.
"Put me down! Put me down, right now! Edward Cullen!" I yelled at him.
"Not until you admit I love you more," he chuckled.
"But that means you'll never put me down," I mumbled.
"Does it really?"
"Yes, silly."
He put me down, "I still love you more though."
I gave him a challenging look, which he returned.
"So, Bella Swan? Would you do me the honour of a date, next week?"
"I'll have to think about that," I paused for dramatic effect, "but of course!"
He beamed, his smile reached his eyes and kept going.
"Emmett, I've had enough. Bella! We're going, NOW!" Rosalie huffed.
"Sounds like you've had fun Rose," I laughed, as the other four walked towards us on their way to the car park.
"It was fine until Emmett decided he'd-"
"Rose, in all fairness, Bella probably doesn't care what Emmett did," Alice interrupted the beginning of one of Rosalie's...rants.
"I can imagine," she huffed, stepping towards my Bentley.
"Girls in Bella's car, Guy's in the Merc," she announced.
"That bad, huh?" I muttered to Alice, who nodded, and immediately ran to the passenger door to save us both the agony of the entire journey filled with a huge go at Emmett.
"I can't wait until we get back to Forks! I've been waiting for this since you got dragged here!" Alice bounced in the plush seats.
Rosalie was grumbling in the back seat, we decided to ignore her, or she'd just give us an ear bashing. She calmed down after a while.
"So, you and Edward?" She started, looking up at me.
"...What about us?" I mumbled.
"Urh...you a...couple? Or what?" Alice asked.
"I don't really know. He asked me out on a date next week?"
"Oooooh!" Alice squealed. "DO you know where he's taking you yet? I'll have to ask him if he's got any plans. Maybe you could...no, too busy. Or the, nope not 'Bella' enough..."
"So, you guys? Any particular song? My iPod's just itching to be played!"
"Shooting Star! SO cute," Alice smiled to herself, obviously she was still planning for Edward. "Oh, and Bella?... Renee's agreed to you moving to Forks, so long as you spend Christmas here, with her." Well that's just perfect.
Pretty if the sun won't shine
I'll be coming out to meet you
I'll be there to make you mine
You're pretty if the rain will pour
I'll be knocking at your window
I'll be begging you for more
It is as if you've come along too soon
and I'm trying to fit you in
but I can't seem to follow
You're a cutie if it all falls through
We can piece it back together
I can learn to trust you too
You're just too good to lose
and I can't refuse
so don't make me choose
between the two
I'm fed up in here
in my atmosphere
Don't you know who you are
You're my shooting star
Your pretty teach me wrong from right
'cause in love there are no answers
and in life there is no lie
You're pretty if the sun won't shine
Now you've come this far to meet me
and I know, I know you're mine
You're just too good to lose
and I can't refuse
so don't make me choose
between the two
I'm fed up in here
in my atmosphere
Don't you know who you are
You're my shooting star
Don't you know who you are
You're my shooting star.
