Present
Blair remained unmoving from where he'd fallen unconscious. The uncontrollable shivering of his body that had inadvertently served as a soothing rocking motion to Noel gradually slowed until it stopped altogether. Wrapped and confined in Blair's coat, Noel leeched the warmth from Blair's body, but the warmly insulated environment began to slowly cool as her rescuer's core body temperature fell closer and closer to dangerously low levels. Feeling the difference, the tiny infant awoke.
Cold, hungry, and with no one else to see to her needs, Noel cried into the night. The wind carried away her plaintive wails, but only the curious predators took notice.
Ira
It was two hours past sundown and as was customary, the men and older boys of Ira gathered for relaxation and fellowship in the designated meeting place under the starlit sky. The oppressive heat of the day was long gone, having gradually been replaced by much cooler air that would eventually give the temperature a sharply contrasting chill.
This was the time of evening when either a blanket or the warmer, hooded simlah would be worn over the lighter tunic. The men reclined or sat in a large circle around a roaring fire, exchanging news, humorous tales, and discussing all manner of subject matter from births to deaths and everything in-between. Tonight's opening topic of conversation was the soldiers from King Herod's army whom Aaron, it was rumored, had been forced at the pointy end of a sword to shelter at the inn.
The rumors circulated wildly and were embellished until it was said that the one remaining soldier was a spy sent to report back to King Herod to further the king's plan to annex Ira to Judea. Neither Aaron, Jacob, nor Gaius were present. The one man from the inn who was present soon tired of the outrageous statements and he set about dispelling them. He was a simple young man; a quiet man, soft-spoken, who wore his strength and dignity like a cloak about him. When Joseph, husband of Maryam spoke, the other's listened and in the end, the men of Ira were more curious about Herod's soldier, than fearful.
Even so, they fell back on tradition and old prejudices in assuming that they would not be seeing him that night. It was understood that soldiers from Herod's army could not expect to be welcomed in their social circle. Finally, an elder spoke the question that was on all of their minds. "Where are Aaron and Jacob? Will they be absent from us yet again?"
Joseph raised an eyebrow in amusement as he saw over the shoulder of the older man facing him from across the fire, the three approaching figures of Aaron, Jacob, and Gaius. "They come now. Aaron, Jacob, and Gaius Felix Justus."
The men swiveled around to look, and they stared in stunned silence as Herod's soldier, flanked on either side by Aaron and Jacob, walked over to the circle and sat down. "Brothers," Aaron spoke in greeting. "This is Gaius Felix Justus. He is our guest. Be hospitable to him."
This was followed by much whispering and muttering which gradually died off without anyone having given voice to any challenge to Aaron's demand. Instead, there was talk about an upcoming marriage between the son and daughter of two of the elders. When that topic was exhausted, a few shopkeepers began to complain about the number of incidents of theft and the lapse of morality. The conversation grew animated, and Jacob, hands flying to make his point, was in the thick of it. Bread dipped in a spicy paste was passed around, and men ate their fill. More conversational topics followed until the talking stopped and the singing began.
Gaius' gaze alternated between the fire and watching Jacob singing. The young man, along with the others, sang with great joy and enthusiasm for life that could not be quashed. Gaius, who had such little experience in such things, felt the contrast keenly. He wanted some of that thirst for life. He wanted Jacob to return to Jerusalem with him and show him how to hold on to that thirst.
The headache, which earlier in the day had been a dull annoyance had slowly increased to a distracting throbbing. This time when Gaius looked at the fire, the flames seemed to dance, and the cackling became like a roaring in his ears. The colors suddenly grew unnaturally painfully intense in their color until Gaius, by sheer force of will, tore his gaze away and gave a small shiver. One of the elders signaled to an older boy standing behind Gaius to give up his wool blanket, which he had wrapped around himself. The boy cautiously stepped forward and gently laid the scratchy, ill-used blanket over Gaius, covering his exposed lower arms.
After a time, the singing died out, and the ancient form of pondering life's mysteries, by offering in a round, commentaries concerning life, started up. Melea, an elder with a sharp eye and quick wit, rapped his walking stick upon the ground and spoke. " There are three things which causes a good man to become faint of heart. But there are four that will stop a man's heart beating altogether." The circle of men grew silent as each thought of an answer to offer for the four mysteries.
"An empty storehouse at the start of a famine," one man offered. That set off a round of discussion concerning the suitability of the answer until it died down.
Gaius took a bite of the bread with the spicy paste and began to chew. Suddenly, his headache flared, and he had the sensation of a vice squeezing his head.
Another man opined, "A warm bed, a hard rod, and a frigid wife." This resulted in laughter and much speculation that the speaker spoke from personal experience until the conversation died down.
"A beautiful unmarried woman with the face of an angel, who has an unmarried older sister with the face of a sow," another man suddenly offered.
The men again roared with laughter and an instant too late, Gaius realized he was in trouble. The sound exploded in his ears, making him dizzy and sick with pain. The clothes and blanket that he had been wearing in comfort moments before now were an unbearable agony, as his skin grew inflamed and irritated. The flavors of the bread in his mouth turned the sensitive flesh inside to hot fire. A moan of pure anguish escaped his lips as Gaius staggered up abruptly, unable to see what was in front of him, yet unable to make sense of the far away things he was able to see down to the smallest insect.
Shocked, Jacob lunged at Gaius to keep the hurting man from accidentally falling into the fire. "Gaius! Gaius!" Jacob called frantically. But Gaius was beyond his reach, his pain too overwhelming. The other men, at first too stunned and frightened by Gaius' apparent sudden demonic possession, scrambled away. Then general chaos broke out as men leaped at Gaius, trying to keep him away from the fire.
Jacob, his long chestnut long curls flying loose about his face, fought to hold onto Gaius, pushing him to the ground and keeping him in place with his body as he desperately tried to reach him with soft words of comfort. But the Zakif was howling out his pain, raging against his senses, and tearing his clothes from his body like a madman. And what Gaius did next chilled Jacob's blood and haunted him for the rest of his days.
The struggle continued until Gaius threw the much smaller man away from him and stood up, pulling the long dagger from his belt. His bloodless hands clenched the knife in a death-grip, the blade pressed straight at his heart. His act was one last desperate plea to end his humiliating agony.
"No! Gaius, no!" Jacob screamed. All movement stopped. Desperate, Jacob closed his eyes and called upon the strength of the only Father he had ever known.
Jacob received his answer.
In one instant, Gaius and Jacob were only two mortal men facing each other. They stood frozen, eyes locked in silent combat. Then the world shifted, and in the next instant Gaius and Jacob were gone and became only a Madreech standing before his Zakif.
"Zakif…" The Madreech's soft voice penetrated through the other's raging storm of confusion and pain.
"Who are you?"
"You know who I am," the Madreech intoned. "What do you require?"
"Release me from this curse."
"I will, but death is not your way of escape. Listen to me. Picture in your mind five lit candlewicks. Do you see them, my Zakif?"
"Yes."
"Give unto each candle the name of one of your senses. Do you see the candle called 'hear?'"
"Yes."
"Using the power of your mind, decrease the length of the wick by allowing the candle to burn down. When you do this, the sounds that even now cause you pain will do so no more."
The Zakif did as he was told and one by one, the Madreech took him through each sense until all the out-of-control senses that had brought the Zakif to the end of a dagger returned to normal. When the blessed relief and peace came to the Zakif, the man Gaius returned to himself and beheld the man Jacob standing before him. Tears of joy and relief were streaming down the young man's face.
Slowly, Gaius lowered his hands and unclenched his fists from around the dagger, which fell harmlessly to the ground. Now tears of joy and relief were streaming from his eyes as well. They spoke no words; none were required. The two men were now bound together in brotherhood, strengthened by something stronger and older that would endure even the sands of time.
Gaius and Jacob remained standing where they were, oblivious to Aaron's frenzied attempts to disband the circle. The richest man in Ira was desperate to put an end to the scandalous scene and prevent tongues from wagging excessively. Aaron breathed a sigh of relief as he saw the success of his efforts, for seeing that Gaius had returned to himself and was calm, the other men and older boys began to shuffle off, muttering to themselves about Herod's foreign devils.
That night, Jacob dreamed. He was in the place of his worst nightmare: Jerusalem, in King Herod's palace. He was defenseless, frightened at the vision of Herod. The tyrant stood before him, a whip in his hand, his bloated face grinning in evil anticipation of the stripes he would lay across his back. At any moment, he would be seized and his skin ripped from his body.
Nearly overcome with terror, Jacob felt his heart beating with great force and speed until he thought it would burst from his chest. But suddenly he felt a presence of something strong and powerful behind him, eventually moving to stand alongside of him. It was Gaius. Gaius stood wordlessly between him and Herod, and his eyes burned with deadly cold fury. In his dream, the king dropped the whip and fled before the Zakif.
Unlike Jacob, Gaius slept deeply and dreamlessly. When he rose to greet the morning, it was with half fear and dread that his newfound control over his senses was only a cruel, fleeting illusion. He was eager to see Jacob again. He needed to confirm that what had happened the night before was real and that the chains and shackles created by the pain and ignorance of who and what he was were gone, banished forever by the bond of Zakif and Madreech.
And that was not all Gaius had on his mind. The call upon his heart to return to Jerusalem was grower stronger. There was his father to consider. Gaius did not know what his father had been told concerning his absence. Had he been falsely branded a deserter and thus his father needed him to return and remove the shame that surely stained his house? Or worse, did Felix believe him to be dead? Though many harsh words and wounded feelings had been exchanged between them, Gaius loved his father and still clung to the hope that one day, his father too would return his love.
There was also Drufus who had found Gaius a particularly convenient target for the attentions of his cruel nature. The desire to avenge the wrongs, to repay evil with evil beckoned like a siren. He did not know if he had the strength to turn his back on it, but he had the wisdom to not wish for his thirst for vengeance to end with his soul's destruction.
Then there was Jacob. The paths of their lives had become inextricably bound together. Gaius understood that he was a Zakif and Jacob, his Madreech, but beyond that, the entire experience and the ramifications for it were still beyond his ken. The one thing he could declare with certainty was that for the first time in his life, he was eager to get on with living, confident that he would no longer suffer as he once had. He owed that to Jacob, and in his mind, Gaius saw himself returning to Jerusalem with Jacob at his side. The thought pleased him greatly.
Unfortunately for Gaius, his pleasure would be short-lived.
Gaius went to the lower level of the inn in search of something to eat for a light morning meal. The normally reserved man smiled warmly at Jacob when he found the other man, bent on a similar mission. Together, the men went to the large room where meals for both family and guests were eaten. When they were both comfortably reclining on cushions around the low table, they began to eat and to talk. Gaius, innocent of the knowledge of the depth of terror Jerusalem held for Jacob, asked the one question that was first and foremost on his mind. The older man cleared his throat. "Jacob," he began, "I must return to Jerusalem. Will you return with me?"
He was wholly unprepared for Jacob's reaction as he watched the blood drain from his face and smelled fear coming from his being. Jacob lowered his head and his unbound hair fell over his features. "I will not go to Jerusalem with you."
"Why?" Gaius asked, eager to understand the young man's obvious fear, but Jacob only shook his head, indicating a reluctance to speak.
Gaius tried again. "We are bound, Jacob. You and I. Do you deny that?"
Jacob's head snapped up. "No!" he declared vehemently. "I would never deny that. But I cannot go to Jerusalem."
Gaius fought his confusion as the recently laid to rest fear of being alone to endure the torment he had known all his life, resurfaced. He was a Zakif, Jacob, his Madreech. He knew intuitively through the supernatural encounter he and Jacob had shared the previous night that he needed Jacob. They needed each other. Gaius felt a profound drive to protect this young man.
Jerusalem held some deep terror for his Madreech, yet he refused to speak of it with him. Gaius' frustration began to seep out into the tone o f his voice, which grew flat. "I would give my life to protect yours, Jacob. I cannot remain here in Ira. Whatever it is that frightens you so, I will protect you."
Against his will, Jacob gave a short, bitter laugh. Then he trembled with fear as he saw the shadow fall upon Gaius' face. "Forgive me," he said softy. His heart weighed down with grief and disappointment, he gave his final answer. "Do not ask me why. I cannot go to Jerusalem with you."
Gaius, who had never begged for anything in his life, not even under the worst beating, did not break his habit now. Instead, he rose silently from the cushions, gave Jacob one last cold glance and walked away, leaving the other man in his shame and misery.
Jacob slowly made his way to his room, his heart heavy, and his mind in turmoil yet again. Once in the privacy of his small room, Jacob washed his face and hands with water from a small bowl with hands that still shook with remembered fear and frustration at being unable to tell Gaius why he could not go to Jerusalem with him.
He had never spoken of those terrible events as an act of survival. Now his inability to tell his Zakif what terrors Jerusalem held for him threatened to break the newly established bond that had been forged. He had a responsibility towards Gaius and now his fear of the past would hold him hostage and away from being at the Zakif's side as was his duty, as well as his deepest desire.
Frustrated and angry, Jacob swept the bowl of water from its stand, sending the water splashing and running down against the stone walls.
Just then Uncle Aaron suddenly appeared in the doorway and Jacob whirled around to greet him. Puzzled, Aaron looked at the mess and at his nephew's unhappy face. "Jacob, what troubles you?"
Deflated, Jacob sighed and replied, "Nothing, Uncle."
"Tell me no lie, boy."
"Leave it be!" Jacob's temper flared again, and Aaron, who had never heard his nephew raise his voice to him, was taken aback.
Embarrassed, Jacob quickly offered an apology.
Aaron studied his nephew's tense features before suddenly changing the subject. "Do you remember that package you hid for me?"
"Of course, Uncle."
"Good. The danger has passed, and it is safe for you to go and retrieve my property."
"Shall I go now?"
Aaron chuckled. "No, give the children their lessons, then go later."
Jacob was not the only one whose emotions and mind were in turmoil. Gaius, too, felt confused and angry. He needed answers. Understanding why Jacob was so adamant about not going with him to Jerusalem was the first step in vanquishing the obstacle. It occurred to him that Jacob's uncle would be loath to speak freely with him, but perhaps his Madreech's mother, Naomi, would not.
To that end, he went in search of Naomi. Eventually, he found the unconventional woman outside in the sturdy shelter which housed Aaron's horses. Naomi's head was uncovered. Her brown hair, burnished with red, framed her beautiful face. She had made short the bottom of her dress by tucking part of it into the belt at her waist as she worked, exposing long, fine limbs. She looked far too young to be the mother of his Madreech. Fascinated, he watched her before making his presence known.
Unaware that Gaius had entered the structure, Naomi spoke softly and soothingly to the beautiful animal as she tended to an old wound that had ailed the horse for some time. Suddenly, as if she knew the younger man was there, Naomi turned and appraised Gaius with an appreciative eye. "You look much better than when I saw you last, Gaius Felix Justus." She smiled a winsome smile and Gaius, despite his troubled heart, could not help but respond to her charm.
"I have the mother to thank for the son who made me well," he replied with a slight smile of his own. Naomi laughed, and the sound was musical and pleasant. Without being invited, Gaius knelt down to inspect the horse's injury.
"What do you want to know about my son, Gaius?" Naomi surprised Gaius with her abruptness.
"How do you know I seek information about Jacob?" he countered as he got to his feet again.
"You did not seek me out to help me tend this animal."
Gaius ceded the point. "I wish to gain an understanding of him."
This time, Naomi's eyes flashed fire. "You mean, you wish to take him from me and return him to the place of his deepest torment."
Gaius hid his surprise at the woman's insight behind an expressionless face. The air was thick with tension. "Tell me what happened. What secret is he hiding from me?"
"It does not concern you, Gaius. It is enough that you wish Jacob to go with you to Jerusalem. The answer is no." Naomi gently placed her hand on Gaius' arm.
Just then Aaron entered the stall and saw the two of them seemingly intimately close. The unreasonable fear and anger he felt whenever he thought about what Naomi had been forced to do to save her son's life, and the more than a few subsequent incidents of improper sexual behavior with men, as well as her cavalier attitude about it, flooded through him. Gaius served King Herod, and in Aaron's rising red haze of fury, at that moment, Gaius was King Herod.
"Must you always play the whore, sister?" Aaron raged. "Even now Jacob has gone up into the hills to unknowingly bring down the dagger and gems - spoils of your time spent in King Herod's chambers."
The blood drained from Naomi's face and like lightning, her arm rose up and she struck her brother across his face. Jacob's mother was infuriated; both because her brother stood in judgment of her, but even more so, because he had endangered Jacob's life by giving him the contraband items to carry on his person. "How dare you!" Naomi seethed. "How dare you sit in judgment of me! The tokens of my so-called whoredom repulse you, and yet you jealously guard them, and then you send Jacob to carry them back and forth on his person. May the gods curse you, Aaron – were you so sure that Herod's soldiers would not have intercepted him the first time?" Without waiting for a reply from the stunned Aaron, Naomi continued, "And what of him?" she asked, pointing at Gaius. "He serves King Herod still and here you speak freely of that which belonged to Herod in his presence. Do you think he has no ears to hear, or is of low intelligence?"
Gaius sought to diffuse the situation. It mattered not that this was a private family dispute of which he was ignorant of many of the salient facts. His Madreech's mother was in distress. It was his duty to protect her in Jacob's absence.
Gaius spoke carefully. "Naomi, Jacob and I are one through the bond of Zakif and Madreech. I would give my life for his 'ere I betray him – or you." He shrugged his shoulders. "You have a dagger and gems that were King Herod's. He has many. However you acquired them, I do not believe it was because you lay with him." He paused for a moment and looked back and forth between the shame-faced Aaron, who stood with his head hanging down, and the defiant Naomi.
On a hunch, Gaius asked, "This has something to do with Jacob's refusal to return to Jerusalem with me?"
Aaron's head snapped up. "Jacob will return to Jerusalem over my dead body."
"Be silent!" Gaius retorted. He looked expectantly and patiently at Naomi.
After a moment of tension-filled silence, Naomi took a deep breath and made the choice to trust the man who represented her enemy, King Herod. Her voice was soft when she said, "I will tell you what you wish to know."
Unashamed, Naomi looked into their faces, "Without Jacob's knowledge, I freely gave my body to Herod to spare Jacob's life. That was a small price to pay to keep him from being burned alive with the others who dared to smash the Roman symbol of the golden eagle that Herod had erected over the entrance to the Temple of Jerusalem.
Herod promised me that he would release my son unharmed, and in return, he would call me to his bed for seven nights." Her face then took on a haunted expression. "But that pig lied, and when he did, I acted without thinking. I needed to take something from him, something valuable."
"Aside from some gems, my sister stole from Herod one half of an intricate weapon that, when put with the other half, form a dagger." Aaron added.
"How did you know that that particular dagger was so valuable to him?" Gaius asked Naomi without judgment.
"Herod kept many females to service his voracious appetite," Naomi explained bluntly. "I learned about that particular treasure, and where Herod kept it, from two of them.
"Anyway, that last night – the last time I went to him, he told me of his true intent. He said that he would first give Jacob something to always remember him by before he let him go. Herod told me he would have my son whipped like an animal, and he did. Jacob nearly died, but not from the pain and blood loss. He nearly died of a broken heart because Herod took great pleasure in telling Jacob what I had done to save his life." Naomi's voice was shaking with barely controlled sorrow and anger.
Only then did Naomi lower her eyes to hide the tears that she could no longer contain. "He had the power of my son's life or death in his hands. He had all of the power, and I had none. I do not regret relieving him of something he valued, and I would do it again."
Slowly, Aaron reached out to his hurting sister. He wrapped his arms around the slender woman and in a whisper meant for her ears, but was clearly heard by Gaius, he said, "I am sorry, my sister. Please forgive me."
Gaius' heart was heavy with the newfound understanding of Jacob's reaction to his request. His Madreech had been brutalized by the most powerful man in Judea, and he'd suffered deeply in body and mind. Of all the physical torments Gaius had suffered, he'd never had a whip flay open his back, yet still, he understood some measure of the pain Jacob had endured. But the hurt to the young man's heart was something he could only imagine. Gaius supposed that the guilt and shame Jacob lived with over how his mother had saved his life must have seemed unbearable to the young man. Gaius' own mother had abandoned him and his younger brother when he was but a child. Left bereft of his mother's love and tenderness, Gaius would have given anything to have her back, safe and protected under the same roof.
Gaius made up his mind to find Jacob without delay and tell him that he understood why he feared accompanying him to Jerusalem, but he deeply desired Jacob to trust him enough to tell him the truth on his own.
He waited until Aaron and Naomi ceased embracing each other and then he asked where he could find Jacob. After Aaron explained how to get to where Jacob was, up in the hills, Gaius quickly departed on a mission to find his Madreech.
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