Chapter 12
"You're that girl who always stalked Arnold,"
The mashed potatoes in Helga's mouth went back into her windpipe as she heard the words. She got into a fit of coughing that encouraged Mrs. Kokoshka to lightly pound on her back as Helga took a drink of her orange juice to help save her from choking.
"Stalked?" Arnold looked shockingly at Helga, like she had just had her head chopped off by a random stranger. "Grandma, what are you talking about?"
"Oh, you know as well as I do, Arnold," Arnold's grandma laughed as she took another bite of roast beef.
Arnold looked at Helga, almost like he thought that somehow Helga would know what his grandmother was talking about.
"Don't look at me," Helga said, but could feel her cheeks burning with blushing…how did she know? HOW DID SHE KNOW?! "I don't know what she's talking about,"
"Oh, don't be so modest, Helen," Arnold's grandmother said. "You were quite mad when Moses stole your pencil, so you practically followed him home every day, waiting for the right moment so you could take it back-you never got the opportunity though, so on Christmas night you snuck in through the chimney and planted mouse traps all throughout our house and we know it was you because you left a broken nutcracker to let us know it was you. Oh, what a kick that Christmas was! Jingle bells, jingle bells," Arnold's grandma started singing randomly, making Helga confused, but decided not to question it.
Phil looked at Arnold's grandma and sighed. "Pookie, you're thinking of the Christmas where we had to set up mouse traps because Ernie here thought it would be wise to bring home a pet rat,"
"I didn't know the rat would have babies!" Ernie said.
"I guess that makes sense," Arnold said and looked at Helga with a smile and rolled his eyes as if to say 'grandparents'. Helga wanted to ask if his grandmother was always this senile, but the look Arnold gave back said 'you might as well get used to it-she's always like this'.
Helga smiled and seeing Arnold around his family made her think about her family-Helga rarely saw her grandparents on her father's side and the grandparents on Miriam's side passed away before Helga was born, so Helga didn't really know about senile grandparents. She did however know about her own parents and she glanced at Arnold out of the corner of her eye-she knew Arnold had lost his parents when he was still a baby and it made her wonder if that's why he's so nice to Helga-Helga didn't have parents either, not really…so maybe they had something in common. And Arnold's parents were probably as caring as he is, so it must have been a huge loss for their entire family; Helga wondered if Arnold still felt sad on the day his parents left, like he would every year when they were kids. No matter what the weather was like, no matter what was going on, Arnold would always seem sad on that day and Helga remembered some years he would stay home from school because of it.
Arnold looked at Helga and she looked back at her food-it was pretty much gone and Helga no longer felt hungry.
"Don't force yourself to eat if you're not hungry," Arnold said.
"Actually, I'm still pretty tired," Helga lied-she had taken almost a four hour nap so she still felt restless-but she didn't want an excuse to still eat more, since she wasn't hungry.
"You can go to bed if you want," Arnold said. "I'll take care of the dishes,"
"I want to help," Helga said, now feeling guilty for lying.
"It's okay-you can make up for it tomorrow night…you've got plenty of time to help with the dishes," Arnold smiled and stood up, carrying his, Helga's and his grandparent's plates into the kitchen. Helga decided to take the initiative and left the dining room. She thought about using the bathroom, but remembered Arnold's warning and decided against it.
Helga entered her room but realized she really wasn't tired-checking her watch, she discovered it was still only 7:45 p.m. Not the best idea lying like that, she thought…what had possessed her to do that anyway? Maybe she'd been lying for so long that it just came naturally to her.
Helga went into her room and dug through her duffel bag before finding her pajamas-instead of the cotton pajama pants, she decided since it was warm she'd wear some pink shorts-she shook her hair out of her pigtails and stretched in the room; Helga didn't think to bring any books and she wasn't ready to go to bed yet, obviously. Helga then glanced out the window and noticed the emergency stairs on the side of the boarding house-Helga then thought how some fresh air might do her good and grabbed the room key and house key that Arnold gave her.
Not feeling like running into anyone, Helga crept down the hallway and downstairs until she reached the front door and exited the house quietly-when she was outside, she went to the side alleyway to the left of the house and began to crawl up the emergency stairs; soon enough, she reached the top of the stairs, where Arnold's window was and Helga couldn't help but glance inside and see Arnold sitting on his bed, reading a book-she didn't want him to think she was really stalking him (especially after tonight), so she boosted herself up onto the roof, careful not to attract attention-when she was safely on the roof, she sat on the edge and looked out at the city of Hillwood as the streetlights shined through the night, eliminating almost all the stars in the sky with the brightness of the city. Helga tilted her face back up to look at the moon-she really had missed Hillwood with all her might. And now she could only pray she would never have to leave again.
Helga sat there for actually a few hours, just staring at the city-as it got darker, the city seemed to get more beautiful-or was it just beautiful because Helga was back?
Helga was so distracted she didn't hear the small creak behind her and didn't hear the footsteps until they were right behind her. Immediately turning around, Helga discovered Arnold not too far behind her.
"Ack!" Helga shrieked from shock and felt herself beginning to slip off the roof. She tried to catch herself but it seemed to make her body really want to fall-she almost did until Arnold grabbed her under the armpits and pulled her back up.
"You okay?" Arnold said when Helga sat safely on the roof again.
"Crimeny, don't do that!" Helga said, breathing heavily. "You almost gave me a heart attack!"
"If you fell off the roof, a heart attack would be the least of your worries," Arnold said, kneeling down beside Helga. "What are you doing up here anyway? I thought you went to bed,"
Helga suddenly remembered something-she remembered how Arnold's bedroom was at the very top of the house and was right underneath a skylight-the skylight had a window so if you wanted, you could crawl onto the roof. Helga completely forgot!
"I…was just getting some air," Helga said feebly.
"Avoiding doing the dishes, are you?" Arnold said.
"What? No, of course not! I'm so grateful for the room and food that I wouldn't-"
Arnold held up his hand to stop Helga. "Relax, I was just kidding-I know it's been a rough day for you,"
Helga paused before sighing and sitting on a small box that was on the roof. "What made you come up here?" Helga asked.
"Same thing that made you-needed some air…I know the boarding house can get…weird sometimes,"
Helga shrugged and didn't say anything-Arnold still knelt on the ground before standing up and sitting next to her.
"Hey…I wanted to ask…well, tell you something," Arnold said.
"Yeah?"
"Well…that stuff you said about your parents not wanting to take custody of you…"
Helga felt a small sting-the memory was still fresh in her head and it still made her heart bleed like crazy. "What about it?"
"It's just…I knew you had problems at home when we were kids. You never liked talking about your sister Olga and whenever she was in town, you'd be really mad. I remember your dad was a jerk, but I always told myself 'at least she HAS parents',"
Helga nodded, understanding where he was coming from. "I know I should be grateful I have them, I do; it's just…"
"Let me finish," Arnold said and took a deep breath. "I had a feeling it was bad, Helga…but after what you told me…I realized it was that bad...I just wish there was something I could do to help,"
Helga shook her head and felt tears sting her eyes but tried to blink them away. "You can't do anything Arnold…thanks for wanting to help though. It's nice to know people still care about me, even after all the crap I put them through,"
"People have been through worse than a few name calling," Arnold said and put his hands in his lap.
Helga pulled her knees up and rested her chin on them, staring out at Hillwood. "Do you miss your parents?" Helga asked without thinking. Arnold glanced at her, shocked and Helga realized she'd over stepped the line once again. "I'm sorry, that was a dumb question-forget I asked,"
"It's okay," Arnold said softly. "I actually haven't thought about them in a while," Arnold was quiet for a few seconds before starting again. "They left when I was still a year old…I don't really remember them. I guess you can't miss what you don't remember. But I do wish that they would come back…or even if someone found their plane-that way, we'd at least have an idea what happened to them. But that's the thing-we don't know what happened to them. They just…disappeared,"
"I'm sorry," Helga said softly. "Compared to you, I should be grateful I at least had parents,"
"Compared to you, I should be grateful I have some other family," Arnold said before looking at Helga. "Don't you have any family besides your parents and Olga? Where is she anyway?"
"She got married a couple of years ago," Helga said, referring to Olga. "She's in Northern Vermont with her husband, working at some big company and teaching piano lessons on the side,"
"Have you thought about maybe going to live with her?"
Helga remembered a bitter memory and she looked away not wanting to remember.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," Arnold said immediately.
"It's okay…can I actually tell you? I think I'd feel better if I told someone…"
"Sure," Arnold said.
"…I actually wrote Olga a letter a year ago asking if she would consider having me live with her. Olga and I were never that close, but I knew…or at least thought-she cared about me, so I thought she would be okay with it. But then I got her response," Helga closed her eyes as the memory of her ripping open the envelope, hoping for good news only to be met with crushing disappointment flooded her with misery. "She said she'd had to put up with mom and dad for 18 years before she went off to college-she told me if she had to put up with it, I had to put up with it too,"
Arnold just stared at Helga for a few minutes, in shock.
"I know," Helga said, keeping her eyes averted. "My life's a never-ending soap opera,"
"I'm sorry, Helga," Arnold said. "Not just about your sister…but about your parents, your school…you've been through so much the past years and we just sat here, thinking you had forgotten us,"
"Even if you did know, there was nothing you could have done," Helga said. "Just don't start pitying me, okay? I don't need that of all things,"
"No, I'm not pitying you," Arnold said. "I think I'm just empathetic of your situation…I wish there was something I could say or do to make it better but I can't think of anything,"
"I think listening is enough, Arnold," Helga said. "Will you please not tell anyone about Olga? I feel like my life's been exposed enough,"
"Of course, Helga…I'm going to get to bed now-you should do the same. Good night,"
"Good night," Helga said. "Oh, Arnold?"
"Yeah?" Arnold paused at the window on the skylight.
"If you tell anyone about Olga…I'll rip your teeth out with a pair of tweezers-got it?"
Arnold paused, looking at her before cracking up. "Got it," he said, laughing and holding his sides. He opened the window and crawled into his room-a few minutes went by before Helga saw the light in his room switch off.
Feeling content, Helga stared out at the city, feeling better.
"I guess confession really is good for the soul," Helga said softly and smiled to herself. "It's the new honest me,"
[A/N]: So? Did that little talk make you feel all warm and tingly inside? ...What? It didn't? ...meh, oh well.
