Disclaimer: I don't own Life is Strange.


Summary: Simple is as simple does.


"Booze, bitches!" shouted Chloe, bursting through the door to Max's dorm with a swift kick. In her arms she carried cases of liquor, the clinking of bottles a cacophony as she set them down on Max's bed.

Victoria regarded the punk rocker with a scowl. "Do you have to announce to the entire dorm that we're drinking illegally, you idiot?"

"We have occasionally loud sex in these cramped-as-fuck rooms, and what you're worried about is getting busted for drinking?"

Much as Victoria hated to admit it, she had no response to that. She settled for flipping the bird.

The door swung open, Max scurrying in with a bright pink Carvel box. She also sported a cut lip and a swollen eye, both of which drew attention from Chloe and Victoria.

"Shit, Max, are you okay?"

"What happened?"

"Did some guy give you trouble?"

"Want me to kill their family line for you?"

Max held up a hand for silence and took a breath. "In order…" she rasped. "I'm fine, I got the cake, not a guy, and no, Tori, that won't be necessary." She stowed away the ice cream cake in the mini-fridge and slumped on the bed, groaning. "So I got to the store, and the cake was there, but the second I grabbed it, some Gucci-glasses wearing, soccer-mom haircut bitch tried to snatch it from me. I wouldn't let it go, so she punched me."

"She WHAT!?" screamed Chloe, and Victoria was already dialing up her dad to coordinate a manhunt. Max calmly reached over and closed the blonde's phone.

"I'm fine. You should see what I did to her." she smirked. "Broke that bitch's leg and ripped out a chunk of her hair."

"Hella fucking yes!" cheered Chloe, high-fiving the hipster. "Mad Max strikes again!"

Sighing in relief, Victoria stood and hefted up her backpack, unzipping it. A bevy of decorations fell out, and the blonde set about placing them around the dorm. "While I'm setting this up, Chloe, you bring up the rest."

Chloe's heart skipped a beat. "Uh…what rest?"

Slowly, Victoria turned around, eyes boring into Chloe's. "What do you mean 'what rest?' The pizza, the snacks, the party games, the shit you promised you'd bring."

Chloe twiddled her thumbs. "I…uh…I thought you were getting that stuff."

Victoria leapt at Chloe but was expertly caught by Max, who had to hold her back from tearing her girlfriend's face off. The punk rocker backed up against the door, fearing for her life. "Max, holy shit, did you rewind?"

"Let's just say, in an alternate timeline, you have a very ripped shirt and a very bloody nose."

"I'll kill you, Price!" shrieked Victoria, struggling in Max's surprisingly firm grip. "I'll kill you and dance on your shallow grave!"

"Hey, not funny! I almost did die a bunch of times."

"Don't remind me." Max grumbled.

After Victoria settled down, Chloe left to grab the things she'd forgotten, leaving Max alone with a very disgruntled blonde. With some consoling, and a promise of a trip to the art museum later, Victoria calmed down and went back to redecorating.

If Max had known planning a surprise party for Kate would be such a hassle, she'd have delegated the role of distraction to someone else. But it was her birthday; short of committing crime, she'd do anything for her special girl.

Okay, maybe she'd steal a scrunchie.

Her phone beeped and Max pulled it out, scanning the text. Her eyes widened and she leapt to her feet, making that half-squeal half-gurgle sound she made when she was worried. "Shit! Kate's coming down here!"

"What!?" Victoria quietly screamed. "Stop her, do something! You're the one in charge of distracting her!"

"W-What do I say!"

Victoria wrung her hands. "Um…say you're naked!"

Max stared at Victoria, wondering if she just heard what she thought she did. "Tori. She's seen me naked. She's seen you naked. She's seen Chloe naked. We had an orgy like four days ago."

"I don't see you coming up with any bright ideas! Use that head of yours for something besides perverted goals!"

"She said, not remembering at all that she was the first one who agreed to said orgy."

"Who says 'no' to an orgy!?"

-knock knock knock-

"Shit!" the two girls whispered.

Max rushed to the door, and just as Kate was opening, slammed it shut. "Don't come in, Kate! I'm uh…I'm naked!"

Kate's giggle was audible through the door. "Max, we've seen each other naked. If I recall, four days ago, we–"

"Yes, yes, I know, but it's different this time! I uh…needed to show Victoria something!" Behind her, the blonde mouthed an incredulous 'WHAT!?' "Something medical." Once more, Victoria mouthed 'WHAT!?'

"O-Oh…should I come back?"

"Yes! Yes, come back in about…half an hour!"

"Okay, then. I hope…everything goes alright." Max pressed her ear to the door and sighed in relief as she heard Kate's retreating footsteps.

"Oh, thank god."

"'Show Victoria something?!'"

"It was all I could think of!"

"Think better!"


Chloe eventually returned with a bag of board games, three piping hot boxes of pizza, and enough chips and dip to feed an army of stoners, Victoria decorated the dorm, and Max had alerted Kate that things were fine and she was free to come to the dorm. The three girls gathered close together, practically bouncing on their heels with glee as they waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

After about an hour of waiting, the trio began to worry.

"You think she got lost?" asked Chloe.

Victoria scoffed. "On her way to a dorm less than thirty yards away? She's not you."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"You couldn't find your own ass without GPS navigation."

"You had no problem finding it four days ago!"

While the pair bickered. Max looked through her phone. To her shock, she had received a text from Kate less than two minutes after giving her the all-clear; in her excitement, she must not have heard the alert.

"Uh, guys…I got a text from Kate."

Removing her hands from Victoria's neck, Chloe gave Max a concerned look. "What's it say?"

"Apparently some friends surprised her with a party and she's with them now, at the beach."

Silence hung in the air like a sharp blade until Chloe spoke up. "Okay, so we're kidnapping her."

"We're what!?" exclaimed Max.

"This was our chance to show Kate how much we love her! And now some neophytes–" Max and Victoria shared a surprised glance. "–are gonna muscle in on our turf? Like hell! C'mon, dudes; we're getting our girlfriend!"

"For once, I agree with you." spoke Victoria, getting to her feet. "Let's get Kate."

"You were sure agreeing with her four days ago."

"Will you shut up about that!?"


When a few of her schoolmates had picked her up saying they were treating her to a surprise party, Kate had been reluctant at first; she had wanted to spend the day with her girlfriends. But they'd looked so pleading, she couldn't resist. She'd spend an hour with them at most, then rush straight back to Blackwell to enjoy the evening with her three favorite people in the world.

"Thanks for the fun everyone," she spoke, waving goodbye to the other partygoers. "But I have to go. See you tomor–"

A beat up truck screeched down the beach, kicking up sand and pissing off more than a few beachgoers. The vehicle stopped right in front of Kate, the door swinging open. A girl (evident by the figure) wearing a black ski mask, dashed out from the truck, grabbed Kate, and dragged her, shrieking, into the truck. The cargo secure, it sped off, kicking up another cloud of sand.


"Well, that was easier than I thought." spoke a masked Victoria from the driver's seat.

"You'd better let me go!" shouted Kate, glaring at her captor. "My girlfriend's a giant, and she can kick your ass!"

"Hey!" Chloe replied, whipping off her ski mask and revealing her signature shit-eating grin. "I'm not that big!"

Kate gaped at the blue-haired girl. "Chloe!"

"Surprise!" Max popped up from behind Kate's seat, flashing the blonde a smile equal parts ecstatic and terrified. "I am so sorry."

"As far as abductions go, this could've gone worse." smirked Chloe. "And wait 'til you see the setup we've got back at the do–GAH!"

Chloe crashed into Max as Victoria took a rather sharp turn. "What the fuck, Chase!?" snapped the punk rocker. "Did you get your license from a cereal box!?"

"I told you I couldn't drive stick all that great!" hissed the blonde. "That's why I didn't wanna drive! It's your stupid car!"

"Max doesn't have her license and I'm the only one strong enough to carry Kate. Were you gonna do it, you noodle-armed bitch?"

"I'm gonna drive us into a fucking ravine!"

Max wrapped her arms around Kate and gave Victoria a dirty look. "Not with the most precious angel in the world in this car you're not!"


While initially terrified, Kate calmed down enough to fully appreciate the lengths her girlfriends would go for her happiness. She was, however, curious why they didn't think to call or text first, and Chloe and Victoria suffered a harsh brow-beating from Max.

However, the excitement was short-lived once they got back to the dorm. At some point during their excursion, the mini-fridge had suffered a short, the contents within melting, including the ice cream cake Max had assaulted a suburban mom for. To add insult to injury, the pizzas were stone cold, the alcohol was warm, and the decorations did little to brighten the dim room.

"This…" Chloe sighed. "Was a total bust."

"Kate, we're so sorry…" sniffled Max, gazing sadly at the sludgy, soggy box that used to hold a delicious ice cream cake. "We tried so hard to make this the perfect day for you, and…"

"We screwed up." mumbled Victoria. "Can you ever forgive us?"

Smiling, Kate pulled the girls towards her in a loving hug. In turn, she gave each of them a kiss and a comforting pat on the back. "Girls," she spoke. "I didn't need a fancy, extravagant party. The best day, the best gift…it's just being with you three."

Those words warmed the girls' hearts, and happy tears flowed freely down their cheeks. "Kate…" spoke Victoria. "We–" Chloe beat her to the punch, shoving Victoria aside and crashing her lips against Kate's. "You bitch!"

Victoria tried to pry Chloe off Kate, only for the blue-haired girl to pull her down with her, Max soon following. The three collapsed on Kate in a happy, laughing mess.

"Wait, before we do anything." spoke Kate. "I should call one of the people from the beach and let them know I'm fine. Nothing ruins the moment like a cop."

Victoria sighed as she recalled four days ago. "Don't I know it."


Holy SHIT this was a behemoth. But so worth it. Fluff and comedy keeps me going. That and mozzarella sticks. Thanks to all who've been reading/liking/reviewing my stuff. More is on the way. Oh, and happy birthday, Kate Marsh~!