Chapter 11 Lessons
Harry gripped the watering can with both hands and dragged it from the pond towards the Yew trees. More water sloshed over the side than remained in the can by the time he'd crossed the distance so it took several trips for each tree.
Corbin yanked a few more weeds from around the squash, watching as Harry carefully tipped the watering can so the water sprayed down on the roots of the tree planted for his mum.
"Memory charms aren't taught at Hogwarts until seventh year." Cassius said, walking out of the house. The air was sparking around him. Even though it was the summer vacation, Cassius had still been going to the ministry to train and study for a couple hours every afternoon, trying to go only when Harry was napping. He'd been gone longer than usual today and now Corbin knew why.
"No." Corbin responded slowly. Memory charms were too dangerous to teach to underage wizards, but a memory charm accident had always been given as the explanation for Cassius's notoriously bad memory.
"So, how was I able to do one after first year? And, if it was one that went wrong, my memory would have just gone. It wouldn't come and go if I got tired."
"Were you studying about memory charms?" Corbin asked, stalling for time.
"We started studying them in the Spring, but I couldn't do additional research," Cassius gestured over to Harry. They'd been busy then getting the house ready for Harry.
"So, now you're studying them." Corbin stood.
"Well, if I did one wrong," there was a whoosh of wind through the trees, "I wanted to know. It doesn't fit."
"It doesn't fit." Corbin echoed.
"My symptoms, what happened to me, it doesn't fit a memory charm gone bad…it doesn't fit a memory charm done right either."
"Oh." Corbin felt his stomach lurch; he'd promised Lucius not to tell Cassius what had really happened. But he'd also promised Cassius never to lie to him. "Well." Corbin was saved from having to say anything more at the moment by Harry running over to greet Cassius.
"Hi! I wat tees," Harry said breathlessly, reaching up towards Cassius. Cassius picked him up, murmuring something to him and hugging him tight. "Nee go wat moe." Harry squirmed.
"All right," Cassius nodded, kissing Harry on the cheek before putting him down.
"Remember when the stick turns all blue, the tree doesn't need any more water," Corbin reminded him, as Harry ran back across to the watering can. He looked over at Cassius who was now chewing on his fingers. He reached out and pulled Cassius's hand away from his mouth, "You could ask your brother. It happened over the summer vac."
"He says it's a memory charm, he's always said that."
"Well," Corbin restrained himself, with great difficulty, from rubbing his stomach. He walked the short distance to the house and went inside, it was almost time for tea. The large kitchen window afforded him a view of the yew trees, the pond and Harry.
"And he's lying."
"How do you know he's lying?"
"Because!" Cassius yelled and Corbin winced as the teapot cracked in half. "The evidence doesn't fit! It has to be a lie!"
Corbin took a breath, trying to figure out what to say. Harry was now sitting in between the Yew trees playing with his dragons.
"Corbin, do you know what happened?"
Christ, Corbin swore silently.
"Corbin."
"I hadn't even met you."
"You didn't come to Hogwarts until a year later, I know that." Cassius's eyes turned black.
"Cassius, calm down," Corbin said firmly.
"You know. You know everything!"
"I'm not going to tell you while the kitchen is exploding around me."
"Corbin, please," Cassius collapsed to the floor, drawing his knees up, gulping in breaths.
"I'll tell you," Corbin dropped to his knees in front of Cassius, "I'll tell you, just calm down."
Cassius was almost hyperventilating, his hands tangled in Corbin's shirt.
"I only know what I was told." Corbin stroked through Cassius's hair. "Shush, Cassie, it's all right, what happened, it can't happen again. It's not something you did. Shush, it's all right, I'm here."
Cassius's hands scrabbled at Corbin's skin. Corbin guided a cold hand over his heart, pressing against it as he continued to whisper reassurances into Cassius's ear. He waited until Cassius's breaths had slowed and his hands were warming where they lay against Corbin's skin.
"Regulus got hurt, knocked unconscious, Sirius blamed you, even though he'd done it. Your father took you home. No one knows if he was trying to get the truth from you or just punishing you, but he used the Cruciatus curse." Corbin spilled the words out quickly as Cassius clung tighter. "It affected your mind, only, not as bad as the Longbottoms. So you were able to get better. But it took a long time."
"I didn't do it?"
"No, you didn't do anything bad," Corbin rubbed Cassius's back, "You didn't start to lose control of your magic until after." Corbin kissed Cassius's ear, the closest he could get to Cassius's face which was buried against his neck. "The…it hurt your brain, it made it so things are harder when you're not rested, or when your stress level is high, or when you've had alcohol. Your temper, your memory, your magic, those are all affected."
"Why didn't anyone tell me?"
"Your brother didn't want you to know." Corbin rubbed Cassius's back, "He thought it would be better if you didn't. He though it would make you upset to know."
Cassius was quiet, his breathing returning to normal as Corbin held him tight.
"Who else knows?"
"Dumbledore knew almost from the beginning. Lucius had to ask him for permission for you to live at Hogwarts year-round." Corbin answered, "Madame Pomfrey. And Owen and Steven know."
"They told you?"
"Stevens told me."
"Does Moody know?"
"Yes. I told him. When I quit the program."
"No one else?"
"Well, some healers at St. Mungo's but they've been paid off. I don't know their names."
"Is the teapot all right?" Cassius asked, finally lifting his head from Corbin's shoulder.
"I can fix it."
"I'm sorry."
"I know. It's all right."
"You're not afraid of anything."
"That's not true," Corbin said, resting his forehead against Cassius's. "But you don't frighten me."
"I'm glad."
"You're all right?"
Cassius nodded.
"You're sure?" Corbin asked, "Would you—"
"Could I talk about it again…if I wanted…later?" Cassius asked quietly.
"Of course, you know that. We can talk about whatever you want. Whenever you want," Corbin answered firmly, standing up after giving Cassius another kiss.
"We hae tea now?" Harry came bursting into the kitchen, stopping short at the sight of Cassius on the floor.
"Yes, I was just going to make it." Corbin answered.
Harry patted Cassius's shoulder gently, "Yous head no fee good?"
"I'm all right," Cassius said gruffly, moving his hand from his forehead.
Harry put his arms around Cassius and kissed his cheek. Corbin smiled as Harry started to tell Cassius about what they'd done that morning.
"You're sure you're all right?" Corbin asked that night, as they climbed into their bed.
"Lots of people have bad memories."
"It's true."
"So…it's not just me."
"No, and you've gotten so much better, it's hardly noticeable." Corbin said honestly.
"That's why you don't like me to drink."
"Yes," Corbin answered.
"And why you make me take potions sometimes."
"Yes." Corbin reached out and ran his fingers through Cassius's hair.
"You take good care of me." Cassius murmured.
"I try to," Corbin said lightly, "Now maybe you won't whine so much when I want you to take a sleeping potion."
"They taste horrible," Cassius moved closer, "Can we have sex?"
Corbin just smiled, pulling Cassius on top of him and kissing him.
