Chapter 12
"There is nothing we can do?" Barnabas asked, for the umpteenth time, to Julia who shrugged.
"I asked Angelique, who basically gave me the runaround. She does not think we can do anything, but does not want to admit it."
"I do not like to admit it, either."
"We have been defeated, it is not pleasant to face it, but it is the truth."
"I refuse this to be the end. I fought too long and hard for David to lose him how."
"Do you have any idea how to storm the Temple of the Sun? "
"No, but..."
"You could not approach it without being burned away. And if you were human, you could never reach it...Megan cannot do it, that's why she is on a wild goose chase...And Angelique... Angelique does not seem to have any answers."
Barnabas sighed.
"At least, after the solstice, we will know that Eliot is safe, and we'll be able to bring Urien back."
"Yes, that much we can do."
George came in as they were bemoaning their impotence.
"I will be going to Egg City soon." he told them. "There is something there that needs looking after."
"Something I should know?"
George sighed. "I will talk to you about it after the solstice. Now you are in no mood to listen."
"But you will tell me."
"Of course. There is something else that I want to do before then. Something that I want to be sure about... Have you considered that Eliot might be safest with his mother?"
"No, his mother does not know how to protect him. Eliot is warded now. And I do not think hat she is the best person to have him."
Of course, Carolyn was family, and Hallie wasn't. There was no point in talking to him. He could tell when Barnabas' mind was miles away. There were things that needed to be said and done.
But not after the solstice, and not after Urien had been taken care of.
It was night, and time to go to bed. She needed to find the Hanged Man as he slept. She needed to summon him and guided him to Amy.
She wondered if she could ask Amy more about Hallie, and about the danger they were all in. But it might not be wise. Amy had to keep her contacts to the minimum, in the space of dreams... And there would be plenty of time for questions when this was over... or it would not matter...
She wondered when she would have to turn over the blood stained linen... Well, she would probably find out...
She prepared herself to bed. Single bed. She should be lying with Adam, not alone, but after his outburst, Adam had decided to sleep on the couch. Not until she decided what to do with her marriage would he come back... if he ever did...
It did not matter... not now.
Sleep came slowly, as the mist of the corridors seeped under her eyelids.
The time had come for her to find the Hanged Man...
It was so obvious, of course... The Hanged Man... life in suspension. Something that should happen, but had not happened, that you had to wait for... A resolution not yet there. A bad decision that could not be undone.
The Hanged man could be cut down and released. Could be cut down and be punished further. Or could remain hanging there for a long time...
She knew the door in front of her. She hesitated for a moment, then knocked on it.
Adam rose easily from the bed and opened the door.
"Carolyn"? he said with surprise. "are you coming for me?"
"You must come with me."
"Why?"
Carolyn looked at him, pained. Did she have to say it? Did she have to admit that she had been wrong, that they could still have a chance, if she was willing to work at it? That the time had come for the Hanged Man to be released?
"It is important, Adam, very important. You must come with me."
Adam wanted to challenge her, mock her for needing him now. but he did not.
This might be your last chance", he thought as he followed her.
So he followed her, and in no time they were in the corridors.
Carolyn sighed. She wanted tot talk to Adam, tell him of what she had come to realize, ask him if they still had a chance.
But that was not why she entered his dreams. She had a duty to bring him to Amy.
Whatever she wished to tell him, she could tell him in the light of day.
They reached the door, which opened slightly to let Adam pass. She turned and faced him. "You must go inside, alone." she gave him the card.
She stood there, seeing him walk into the room from which she was now barred. Saw the door close, and knew that she would return before Adam came out again...
Whatever she wanted to say to him, would have to wait for the light of day...
Adam faced Amy.
"Have you brought the card with you?"
"Yes."
"Lay it on the table."
Adam did so."
"Do you claim this card as yours?"
"I do."
"Why do you claim it?"
"I claim the Hanged Man because, like him, I am in a suspended state. I am waiting for something to happen, but I am not sure what. I know that it is greatly my fault that I now hand upside down, that I cannot seek the path ahead for myself. I have been given a while to ponder my own failings which brought me to such a state, but that knowledge might not be enough to sever the rope that holds me."
"You have achieved a measure of self-knowledge. And indeed, the Hanged Man represents the state previous to self-knowledge, and it such knowledge that will set him free. So that it both symbolized unresolved conflict and resolution."
"So there is hope for me and Carolyn?"
"You must both seize it."
"I see.."
"You have answered well." Amy said. "This is indeed your card. Do you now why I have called you here?"
"No, I was not told."
"There is danger threatening Collinwood"
"About David?"
"Yes. The danger has not gone away yet. Are you willing to help against it?"
"Why not? Carolyn might even be grateful and notice me again."\
"You agree, then?"
"Yes. What must I do?"
"There is one thing that you must acknowledge before you can be of use, one that you do not wish to do, yet it is part of the self-knowledge that you need to cut yourself free."
"What do you mean, I do not want to acknowledge?"
"You suspect it, don't you?"
"No... I don't"
"Only you can cut the rope and only one knife will sever it."
Adam shook his head.
"What is it that you don not wish to acknowledge?"
"I do not wish to acknowledge it because it isn't true."
"What isn't true?"
"That I am Barnabas' son!"
"And you seek to deny it, and too many of your actions are an effort to deny it, and to hurt him... That's why you married Liz and why you made so many bad decision. And may continue to do so, in spite of your best intentions."
"Enough!"
"You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. Remember that, Adam."
"Only it is not the truth."
"What is the truth?'
"Does it matter?"
"It does if you wish to cut yourself free."
"Barnabas Collins is not my father."
"You exist because of him. He did not will it so, but still it is his life force that animated your body."
"For his convenience. I was just a side effect, one that he could not wait to get rid of."
"So he was a lousy father. Still, he IS your father."
'All right. Same as Robert Loomis is Willie's father?"
"Yes. You got a rotten father... But he is the only father you got."
"All right, I can accept him that way. No better than that old lush, Loomis."
"So you know that you carry part of him with you."
"Unfortunately."
"You must use your connection with him, to find the box I need."
"Which box?"
"Willie Loomis will show you the way. He has constructed a wooden star, which at the right time will be your beacon. But to do so, you must take into yourself enough of Barnabas' nature."
Adam paled. "His nature?"
"You must call on the old link, on your inheritance from him to draw enough of the vampire nature into you. Enough that you will need blood to provide the energy for what you must do. Enough that you can turn into a bat or mist and fly up. But able to stand the rays of the sun... You are to penetrate the Temple of the Sun, and retrieve the box there."
"That's what I need to do?"
"Yes."
"And I will be free of him afterwards?"
"Yes."
"Then I will do it."
"Good. There is one more thing. Take a card."
Adam did.
"It is the Moon."
"You must seek the one to whom this card belongs and give that person this card."
"But who is this person?
"You will know when the time comes."
