In the aftermath of their lovemaking, Obi-Wan let his fingers lazily strum through Anakin's hair. The younger man was sprawled across his chest, metal arm wrapped around his waist, head tucked under Obi-Wan's chin. A content sigh left Anakin at the contact, and he wrapped his arm tighter around his former Master, trying to get as close to him as possible. Obi-Wan let out a light chuckle as Anakin snuggled closer, he always loved when the younger Jedi was like this. He had truly missed these quiet moments between just the two of them, when they could just be Anakin and Obi-Wan, nothing else. The sound of a door closing somewhere reminded Obi-Wan that their were others in this house with them, others who would also enjoy Anakin's company.
Before he could think better of it, he spoke. "Why didn't you want to be with Padme?"
Anakin let out an aggravated sigh at the question. "What happened between Padme and I ended a long time ago. We were only together a few times, but neither one of us wanted more."
"I see." Was all Obi-Wan could manage. "Well, she seemed very excited to have you back in her home."
"Maybe she thought things had changed for me." Anakin murmured, his breath warm against Obi-Wan's bare chest.
"I thought you said you both didn't want more." Even Obi-Wan could hear the accusation in his tone.
"I was in love with her," admitted Anakin. "Or at least I thought I was. Once things started to get more serious though, I realized she wasn't who I truly wanted."
"You wanted to be a Jedi more." said Obi-Wan.
"No." Corrected Anakin. "Well, yes and no. I've always wanted to be a Jedi, but we both know how I struggle with emotions. I realized she wasn't the most important person to me, and all at once I couldn't keep lying to myself about it. So I ended things with Padme. Good thing too," he said with a self depreciating laugh "who wants someone who was a fuck slave?"
"Anakin-" began Obi-Wan, but Anakin just shrugged him off.
"It's fine, Master. I have to come to terms with it if I'm going to get any better." He sat up and stretched his arms above his head, lean muscles gleaming in the moonlight. "Hey, do you think Snips would be up for some practice tomorrow?"
Obi-Wan smiled softly, "I believe she would be thrilled."
The next morning Anakin was up and stretching before Obi-Wan was even out of bed. He looked almost like himself again, eyes bright with mischief, bouncing on the balls of his feet, eager to get a lightsaber in his hands once more.
"You're making me tired watching you." Obi-Wan complained, making Anakin grin. "Ahsoka should have one of your old lightsabers, why don't you go find her?" When Anakin pouted at him, he couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him. "I'll meet you both outside." The promise making Anakin smile before leaving the room.
Obi-Wan smiled to himself, feeling truly at peace for the first time in a long time, but he supposed that was what happened when the person you cared most for was finally healing. Last night with Anakin was more than he could have ever hoped for. While he knew the younger Jedi was far from healed, he was on the right path. Something he proved when he returned to his room last night, absent of more drugs, and admitting that he no longer wanted to be a victim. Obi-Wan had to admire Anakin's sheer determination to be better than his circumstances, and while he always knew the other man was strong, to overcome what he had took a whole new different type of strength. Something that made Obi-Wan respect his former Padawan even more than he already did. Obi-Wan rubbed his face and then rose from the bed, he was certain Anakin would want him to watch their duel, the boy loved to show off.
When Obi-Wan made it outside, Ahsoka and Anakin had just started dueling, their lightsabers clashing as they met blow, for blow. He watched in awe as Anakin dogged one of Ahsoka's strokes. Even after everything he had been through, Anakin was still an amazing fighter. Both Jedi and Padawan were grinning as they exchanged blows, and over the sounds of lightsabers clashing, Obi-Wan could hear the pair taunting each other playfully.
"Come on, Snips!" Anakin called out as he spun away and then blocked her downward arc with his own lightsaber. "I stopped training for eight months just to give you an edge, and this is the best you've got?"
"I didn't want to go too hard on the elderly." Quipped Ahsoka, using one lightsaber to block Anakins, and then used her other to swing at Anakin's legs.
He jumped out of reach easily. "Ah, so you've been training with Obi-Wan too much." Obi-Wan rolled his eyes as the pair paused during their fight to look over at him with a grin, before once again going on the attack.
The fight continued, and soon it became clear that Anakin, despite his cocky attitude, was not quite ready for such rigorous training. His movements were losing their typical grace, and his tunic was covered in sweat. Still, his gaze was determined as he battled his Padawan. But Ahsoka soon got the upper hand, she was able to slide behind her Master, she quickly disabled one of her lightsabers and grabbed his hair, pulling his head back and exposing his throat where her other lightsaber was aimed.
"Surrender, Master!" She yelled victoriously. When Anakin didn't say anything, she dropped her hold, brow furrowed in confusion. "Master?"
Anakin took a step forward and then threw up. His whole body shook as he emptied the contents of his stomach onto the ground before him. He could hear Ahsoka trying to talk to him, asking what was wrong, but he was too caught up in the past to focus.
Falik grabbed his hair, yanking his head back viciously while simultaneously rubbing his hardness against Anakin's backside. "Surrender, Slave." He hissed. "Admit you want this."
"No." Groaned Anakin. "I don't want this, just leave me alone!"
"Your arousal says otherwise." Falik taunted as he reached around and grabbed the throbbing member.
"The drugs want it, not me." When Falik grabbed him, he cursed viciously. "Don't FUCKING touch me! I don't want this!"
Ahsoka watched in horror as her Master shouted in a panic, his breath coming out in frantic bursts as he fought some inner demon. "Don't touch me!" He was screaming into empty space, hands forming fists. Ahsoka started forward, but Obi-Wan was faster, already kneeling next to Anakin before she had taken a couple steps.
He fought against Falik's hold, even when he knew it was no use. He was repulsed by himself, at the arousal he was sporting, even as he continued to scream for the other man to stop. If you really don't want this, then why are you hard?His inner voice taunted him, making him feel dirty at something he couldn't control. He felt the hot tears of shame gather in his eyes, spilling onto his cheeks as Falik continued his abuse. Maybe he did deserve what was happening to him.
"Can you hear me, dear one?" Obi-Wan's voice brought him back to the present. He blinked slowly, taking deep breaths while letting his mind adjust to where he really was. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he turned to meet the worried gaze. And then he was blurting things out, things he never wanted to say.
"He would hold me like that, after the drugs, he would grab my hair-" a sob caught in his throat as he spoke of the past. Tormented eyes met Obi-Wan's own. "How am I supposed to be a Jedi, after all this?"
"You will get through this, Anakin." Obi-Wan promised, his voice holding no doubt, his hand rubbing Anakin's back in soothing circles. "You are stronger than anyone I know, even more so for surviving what was done to you." Anakin listened to Obi-Wan's kind words, trying his best to believe them. When he felt like the worst of the nausea had passed, Anakin picked up his lightsaber and turned back to Ahsoka, who had an odd look in her eye.
"It wasn't just torture, was it, Master?" The question caught him off guard, and he just stared at Ahsoka, at a loss for words. When it was clear he wasn't going to say anything, she continued. "You said not to touch you." When Anakin looked at her confused she continued, "Right after you threw up, you started yelling not to touch you." Anakin felt himself pale as he realized what his Padawan was talking about. He must have spoken aloud when he was relieving the memory. He hadn't wanted her to know what had happened to him, hadn't wanted her to know his shame.
Apparently it was too late for that, and Anakin found himself dropping his gaze as he spoke."If you want another Master, I understand." he said quietly.
Ahsoka marched forward and forced him to meet her angry glare. "Why would I want another Master?" she demanded, "when I have the best one right in front of me? That is, unless you're worried I'm going to be better than you." Anakin found himself grinning at her taunt, it was exactly what he needed. The fact that Ahsoka wasn't looking at him with pity, and instead was challenging him like usual, meant the world to him. In her eyes, she wasn't the abused Slave, but rather her Jedi Master, and she expected him to act like one.
The pair of them continued to duel for another thirty minutes, until Obi-Wan told them it was time to stop for the day. When Anakin didn't put up a fight at the order, he knew the younger man must be exhausted, but even so, he was smiling and chatting with Ahsoka as they returned to the house.
"You better take a shower, Master." Teased Ahsoka, "otherwise Padme might kick us out just to get rid of the stink."
"Ha ha, very funny Snips." Said Anakin, rolling his eyes playfully at his Padawan. She grinned and then headed towards her room, no doubt to take a shower herself. With Obi-Wan at his side, Anakin walked down the hall and into his room. He sank onto the bed and began unlacing his boots, when he straightened the room spun and he had to put a hand on the side of the bed to steady himself.
"Take this, dear one." Obi-Wan said, passing him his next dose of golis.
Anakin shook his head no and stood up, stripping himself of his clothing and heading towards the fresher, he almost made it to the door but at the last minute his body shuddered and he fell heavily against the wall. Obi-Wan was next to him in a flash, laying a steadying hand on him as he once again tried to pass the drug over.
"I can go a little longer without it." Anakin said through numb lips.
"I'm afraid you cannot, Anakin." he said with a worried frown. " We both know you were supposed to take this dose nearly two hours ago."
Anakin started to refuse again, but tremors took over his body and it was all he could do to remain standing. With a defeated glare, he grabbed the syringe, plunging it into his arm and dispensing the drug before throwing the container to the side.
"Happy now, Master?" grumbled Anakin.
"Hardly." scoffed Obi-Wan. "I will be happy when you do as I ask without argument."
Anakin smirked. "Don't hold your breath."
"I never do when it comes to you." replied Obi-Wan, returning the smirk.
Anakin gave him a begrudging smile and then turned on the water, waiting until it was warm enough to step under the spray.
"Are you going to join me, Master, or just stand there?" Anakin asked when Obi-Wan hadn't moved. Obi-Wan could feel himself blushing under Anakin's stare, and he started to mumble something about checking on Artoo, when suddenly Anakin was standing in front of him.
"I want you with me." he said, one hand cupping Obi-Wan's cheek, eyes dark with emotion. "Please?" The longing in that tone had Obi-Wan nodding, and after quickly stripping, he joined Anakin in the shower. In that moment, he knew there was nothing he would deny the man before him, all Anakin had to do was ask.
To be continued...
