"You've summoned the guards to bring the patient?" asked Dr. Flint, not looking up from the file he was reading as he entered the electrotherapy room.

"Yes, sir, Dr. Flint," said the doctor, wearing glasses and a lab coat, with her blonde hair done up in a tight bun. "They should be here shortly."

"Good," he said, continuing to read the file. "Where's the other assistant?"

"Just coming, Doc!" said a voice as a man entered the room, shutting the door behind him. He turned the key in the lock, and Flint looked up, annoyed.

"Don't lock it, you fool, we're still expecting the patient…" he began, but his voice froze in his throat as the assistant turned around, to reveal the smiling face of the Joker, dressed in a lab coat and wearing thick, square glasses without lenses.

"Patient's here, Doc!" he chuckled.

Before Flint could react, he was clubbed on the head by the blonde assistant, who shook her hair out and was suddenly recognizable as Harley Quinn.

"Well, that should hold him until he wakes up," said Joker, as he finished securing the unconscious Dr. Flint to the metal slab and hooked up the wires. "How do I look, pooh? I feel all nerdy," he said, adjusting his glasses. "I can feel my social skills evaporating, and the depression and lack of self-worth settling in. Must be how Johnny Crane feels every day!" he chuckled.

"You look just precious, puddin'," cooed Harley, kissing his cheek. "I've always had a little thing for nerdy guys. I kinda wish I'd hit him harder so he'd be out longer, and we could play naughty doctor and dirty nurse."

He giggled. "Well, we could see how far we can go before he wakes up. How are you feeling today, Nurse Quinn?"

"Oooh, honestly, Doctor, not too good," she sighed, grinning. "Real…bad, actually."

"Oh, my. Would you like Doctor Joker to take a look at anything? I'm sure I can make you feel better," he said, smiling as he picked her up and sat her on top of the desk. "Just tell me where it hurts, and I'll give you a close examination. If nothing else helps, I'll have to give you a shot to make it better. Would you like the Doctor to give you a shot, Nurse Quinn?" he murmured, grinning as he leaned into her.

"Oh yes, please, Doctor," she whispered, opening her legs and pulling him into her embrace. "I think you'll need to examine me thoroughly first," she murmured, unbuttoning her blouse. "You don't wanna miss something important, like I did on that patient. I'm still in need of a good tongue-lashing for that."

"Well, allow me, Nurse Quinn," he murmured, kissing her passionately. She began tearing at his shirt when Dr. Flint groaned. Joker sighed, drawing away.

"Ain't it always the way?" he muttered. "You get in the mood, and the prisoner regains consciousness. Oh well!" he chuckled, adjusting his glasses again as Harley reluctantly buttoned up her top. "I'm sure we can have even more shocking fun with Doc Flinty! Might even be able to cure him of the annoyance of life, just like I did with his wife, eh, Flinty?"

"When I get out of here, I will break you both!" he hissed.

"Oh dear, he does have anger issues," sighed Joker. "Those kinda things can get you into trouble if you're not careful. Well, this doctor friend of mine says the best way to rid people of violent impulses is to use electrotherapy. The guy swears by it, doncha, Doc?" he said, grinning.

"This is your last warning," muttered Dr. Flint.

Joker sighed, taking off his glasses and pretending to clean the lenses. "Well, I don't see any other choice, Nurse Quinn. Anger issues, delusions of being in authority, sick, perverted pleasure in torturing people…I really do think pain is the only way to cure him."

He replaced the glasses on his nose. "Now Doc, I know it's gonna be hard for you to admit, and it's not something you wanna say, but if you're gonna help yourself, you gotta take this first step. You gotta admit that you're crazy. You gotta tell me that everything you believed in was a lie, and you gotta apologize to me for thinking otherwise. So go ahead, Doc. Say 'I'm crazy.'"

"Never!" snapped Flint.

Joker nodded. "Nurse Quinn, if you would be so kind."

"Sure thing, Doctor J," sighed Harley, pulling the switch. Bolts of electricity shot through Dr. Flint, who roared in pain.

"Now Doc, I can make the pain stop," said Joker, grinning, after several minutes of torture. "All I need you to say is that you're crazy. Say that, and the pain will go away. Permanently."

"Go ahead and kill me!" he hissed. "I'll see you in hell!"

Joker chuckled. "Kill you, Doc? I'm trying to help you! Why can't you see that? I'm trying to cure you of the troublesome burden of sanity! You don't need my help, though – you're already off the rails! All you gotta do is admit it. If you don't, I still won't kill you, but I can guarantee you'll think of me every day for the rest of your life, every morning when you're helped outta bed and into your wheelchair, every day you spend immobile in front of your TV, and every night you're helped back outta your wheelchair and into your bed. You'll stare at the ceiling thinking about me, about Harley, about all of us, and how you failed. And I hope you'll think of me laughing. Cause that's what I'm gonna be doing, Doc. I can't help it – just thinking about it puts a smile on my face!" He chuckled. "Ready to take his therapy to the next level, Nurse Quinn?" he asked, turning to Harley.

"Yes, sir, Doctor J!" said Harley, turning the switches to maximum.

"I think cooking him for ten minutes oughta do it!" said Joker, checking his watch. "Start the oven, Nurse Quinn!"

Ten minutes later, Joker held up his hand. Dr. Flint had lost consciousness. Joker checked his pulse and made sure he was breathing and then turned away. "C'mon, baby, we better get back before Doc Leland realizes we're gone," he said, heading for the door. "Oops, almost forgot to give him something to remember me by!" he chuckled, pulling out his knife. He took one of Dr. Flint's hands and carved a 'J' deep into the back of it. "You wanna do one, pooh?" he asked, handing the knife to her.

Harley giggled, carving 'HQ' into his other hand. Then Joker took the knife back and expertly cut the word 'crazy' onto Dr. Flint's forehead. "Consider yourself cured, Doc!" he said, striding from the room and laughing.