Disclaimers: I don't own the rights to Star Ocean: Till the End of Time, and I make no profit off this story. Suing me would be a waste of time and money, so don't.

First off, I want to suggest you all read the fic written by Catfish Tango if you like this one. It's being written with my complete approval and support, and those of you who like Two Soldiers will likely enjoy that one too.

Second, I know this chapter has been a long time in coming, but Chapter 11 just didn't get enough reviews. If you want more, review. If not, I'll probably take forever to write the next chapter. Your choice. If you want me to write other fandoms, let me know about that too. There's a list of ones I might want to do in my profile.

This chapter has some spoilers for the ending, just so you all know. If you haven't played it yet and want it to be a surprise, hurry up and do so so you can read this, or just deal with it.

Last, this chapter was hard to write, because for a while I couldn't figure out when it should be set, and what I wanted to do with it, so I decided to do something that was suggested to me in an e-mail and I had been thinking about doing anyway. I decided to bring up a couple I'm kinda interested in, so tell me what you think. More importantly, I'm going back. Here goes.

Two Soldiers: Fire and Ice

Chapter 12: Death of the Creator and a Reason to Believe In Reality

This was it. This was the end. The Creator was dying before them, but he had done something that was deleting their universe. Nel watched as bit after bit of the Eternal Sphere vanished before her eyes, and wondered where her world was in this strange device. Was it gone already? Was Elicoor gone forever? Was Clair... was Clair gone? Had her beloved been erased already, or was that yet to come? She felt something strange and looked down. Her own body seemed to be glowing and separating, and she found that the others were finding the same happening to them.

"What's happening!"

"We're being deleted," Cliff said softly, watching Fayt and Sophia reassure each other, and Mirage gently touch Maria's shoulder, looking more emotional than she had been in all their adventures under a thin veneer of calm.

"We're dying, then. Being erased from existence, just like everything we hold dear. We were too late."

The big blonde shook his head, but it was the now brightly glowing Maria who answered, a strange look in her blue eyes as she looked at Mirage. It was like she was seeing the other woman for the first time, and the redhead wondered just what had passed between them in those few moments.

"We can fight it. It's like Fayt said. We have to believe. There's no way we could have come this far only to fail. Think of those you love. Remember them as they were. They are our reason to exist, our reality. As long as we remember..."

The Quark leader's voice trailed off, the strangely segmented golden light covering her completely. Mirage nodded as though in reply to an unspoken question.

"...As long as we remember," the blonde woman finished, "we exist."

Nel felt herself separating from her body, her conscious mind floating in nothingness as her body was deleted. At first, she despaired, then a voice came to her from the depths of her memories.

"Don't let him kill you. My spirit will be with you through it all. I only hope it's enough…"

It was the last thing Clair had said to her before she left, and the reminder made her struggle against the approaching oblivion. She had made a promise to protect Clair and return to her. She refused to give up now. She would find a way to get Clair, her home, her life, back. She didn't care what it took. Clair would not be deleted. Clair's home wouldn't be deleted.

'And I will NOT be deleted! I exist! I think for myself, I have a heart and mind and free will! No one will take that, much less her, away from me!'

And so, Nel fought with every ounce of mental strength she could muster. In doing so, she found her mind casting into the past, reliving the memories of meeting the little four-year-old girl that had grown into her beloved.

(Flashback)

(Author's Note: I once promised myself I would never put one of these in the middle of a story, but I have to warn you that I very, very rarely write children. Just give me some slack here, okay?)

It was her first visit to Castle Aquaria, though she had been to Aquios before. She was in her fourth year, and her father had decided it was time she come with him to the castle. She had been so proud when he told her this, but now she wandered the halls, feeling very much alone. Nel loved her father, but he was a busy man. An official of some kind had called him into some meeting or another, leaving her alone. She was by no means lost, having an amazingly sharp memory for a four-year-old, and knew the layout of the castle, but she didn't know where to go.

"There's nothing to do here..." she muttered to herself. She may have known her way around, but she wasn't completely sure where she was allowed to go and where she wasn't, and she didn't want her father to get in trouble.

'I wish I had stayed home. At least there's someone to play with...'

Just as she thought it, a small form slammed into her from an adjoining hallway, knocking her over. Anger as fiery as her bright head hair flared up, and she jumped to her feet, ready to attack whoever had run into her. To her surprise, her 'attacker' was a small girl around her own age, and she forgot all about the beating she was supposed to be giving when she noticed the girl was hurt.

"Ow... I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there..."

The words spilled out rapidly, and pale brown eyes met her own bright green, begging for forgiveness. Nel smiled warmly, finding herself completely unable to remember to be angry. She kneeled, casting a critical eye on the scrapes caused by the hard stone floor, and the burns from the rugs that covered part of it.

"Those look like they hurt. Are you okay?"

A short tail of gray hair fell across one of the sweet, innocent eyes, and the redheaded child leaned forward, keeping it away from a cut in the other girl's forehead. Her father always said to keep things away from cuts, especially if they were bleeding. It was bad hygiene, he said. She didn't know what that meant, but she did know that hair was really hard to clean out of cuts, and getting blood out of hair wasn't much easier.

"I'm okay," the girl replied softly, smiling up at her. Nel felt her small body warm, and she smiled back. She had never felt like this before in her short years. For the first time, she had met someone who she just couldn't be angry at, and someone who she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt she wanted a friend. It had always taken time for her to warm up to other kids, but not so with this girl.

"We should get those cleaned. My daddy said that dirty cuts are bad for you, that they can make you sick. I hate being sick. It's no fun."

The injured child smiled warmly, her eyes dancing.

"My daddy says that too. But I can't go talk to him to get his help. He's in one of his special meetings."

Nel's eyes widened. If she was very lucky, this girl would be someone she could play with when their fathers were in meetings. The idea made her very happy, but she calmed quickly for once, reaching out to take the other child's hand and help her up.

"Mine is too, but that's okay. I'll take care of you. My daddy showed me how to take care of cuts, because I get a lot of them. I'll take you to our room and make everything better, just like he showed me."

The girl took her hand, straightening her dress as best she could. Nel tilted her head. Most of the children she played with wore pants and tunics, but then, most of those she played with were boys. They would never wear dresses. She never did either, despite the urging of her father. They just got in her way.

"Your dress got all ruined..." she said sadly. It really was pretty, and it looked so nice on the girl.

"That's okay," she replied, giggling, "My daddy never gets mad at me when I rip my clothes. He says it just shows I'm his daughter."

Nel thought this was a strange way to look at it, but she didn't say anything. Adults were strange that way, and anyway, it had just occurred to her that she still didn't know the name of this potential friend. She thought about this as she led her to the room she and her father shared, taking out the special little kit of bandages and cleaning cloths that he had made for her.

"Here. This might hurt a little, but Daddy says they're good for scrapes, and that they kill all the bad things that'll make you sick."

The small girl smiled softly, watching her. She winced a little when the cloths touched her skin, and Nel felt her heart skip a beat and fill with guilt. She may have constantly beaten up the little boys she played and fought with, but she found herself unable to tolerate hurting this frail, pale child. There was just something so different about her, something she couldn't begin to understand.

"I'm sorry," she stammered, her head down, "I... d-don't be mad at me..."

A small, delicate hand brought her chin up so she was looking into understanding brown eyes.

"It's okay. I know these hurt, and you did tell me they would. Don't feel bad. You're helping, remember? I'm not mad."

For the first time, the redhead knew what it felt like to want to trust another person completely. As a rule, she genuinely trusted no one but her own father not to trick her, after a long time of boys who would like little more than to get one up on her. Those pale eyes, though, seemed to look into her and see everything, while at the same time making her feel warm and safe. Somehow she knew the girl would never want to hurt her, and wouldn't lie or trick her. Slightly confused but not sure why, Nel cleaned and bandaged Clair's cuts and scrapes just like her father had shown her, not meeting the other child's eyes. She was already feeling more than she had in her short years, and her young mind had no way to comprehend those feelings.

"There," she said softly, looking at the other child's dress-clad knees, "That's all of them."

She suddenly remembered something her father did sometimes when she hurt herself really badly, and leaned forward, brushing her lips against the bandaged cut on the pale girl's forehead.

"All better."

The milk-white skin tinted pink, which made Nel blush too. Instead of being annoyed, the girl laughed softly, seeming much older than the redhead all of a sudden.

"Thank you so much. What's your name?"

The green-eyed terror of her hometown blushed again, looking shyly at what she hoped was her new friend.

"I'm Nel. Nel Zelpher. What's your name?"

"Clair Lasbard," came the answer immediately. The brown eyes warmed even more when Clair grinned at her, and Nel smiled right back, in awe of how mature and pretty the little girl was.

"I think you're really pretty and nice," she blurted out, unaccustomed to keeping her thoughts inside, "and I really wanna be your friend. Can I?"

She blushed as bright as her hair when the gray-haired child laughed, but somehow she knew she wasn't being laughed at. Clair was too nice to laugh at her. Instead, she felt her heart race, and a sudden thrill go through her body at the sound. She wanted to make the other girl laugh again like she wanted nothing else in the world. Something was telling her that Clair didn't laugh enough. She wasn't sure if it was her maturity or her thoughtful face that made her so sure, but she could tell her new friend just didn't have enough fun, and was determined to change that.

"I think you're very pretty and nice too, and of course I'll be your friend, if you'll be mine. It's so lonely here without anyone to talk to or play with."

Nel jumped around the room, all the energy she had bursting out into the room. Clair watched her and laughed again, and when she came close, the small girl jumped up and hugged her, planting a kiss on her cheek. Once again, the redhead found herself blushing, listening avidly to her new friend's laughter. She had never heard anything quite like it.

(Flashback)

The spy smiled to herself. She had forgotten just how much Clair had affected her right from the start, and realized now just how inevitable it had been for her to fall in love with her best friend.

'Clair... I miss you so much. You made my life so... Gods, I don't even know how to describe it. You made my life worth living, even when I wanted to die. You were there after my father died and I was ready to give up. That had been a wonderful day right up until the news came, too...'

(Flashback)

A teenage Nel laughed as Clair somehow managed to be graceful while flopping onto her bed, leaning into her open arms and moaning loudly in frustration.

"Apris save me! That History of Aquaria teacher is just too stupid! I kept having to correct his mistakes! Why do they even let him teach!"

The redhead gently massaged her friend's tense back. Every time she went to that class, she came back in knots. Nel was taking the same class, but with a different teacher. It was one of only two classes she didn't share with Clair, but she wished she did, if only to help her relax. The other girl was brilliant, incredibly patient, and calm as the perfect blue sky in the growing season, but somehow this teacher always managed to get to her.

"Why do you let him bother you, Clair? I've never met anyone who gets to you as much as he does, except maybe your father. Is there something you haven't told me? I can't be very easy to work with, but you never get so stiff even after hours of working with me, so he must be really horrible."

The beautiful teenager smiled warmly up at her, leaning into her strong hands. Ever since they'd met about nine and a half years ago, they'd become very close, so much so that they'd practically moved in together other the last couple of years. Adray, when he wasn't in a far away land, treated her like another daughter. It gave her an inside perspective on why the two didn't get along well. The man loved his daughter dearly, but he was overbearing and stubborn, and always thought he was right, where Clair was intelligent, open-minded, and patient, except when faced with someone so narrow-minded and blind they couldn't see the world in front of their eyes.

"That's it. Right there..."

Nel grinned, pushing into a particular spot in Clair's lower back that seemed to be bothering her. It pleased her to no end when this calm, sensible, steady young woman turned to putty in her hands, though she didn't know why. She pressed against the knot, a warm rush going through her when her friend groaned in approval, squirming slightly and leaning further into her. Another grin crossed her lips, amazed at how open and vulnerable the beauty let herself be with her. With anyone else, Clair was kind, warm, and polite, but she would never let anyone do this to her. Anyone except Nel, that is.

"I love doing this for you, but I hate it when you get in knots. This is by far the worst mess I've ever had to deal with, too, Lasbard. Now spit it out."

Clair chuckled, knowing the redhead was serious when she called her 'Lasbard,' then moaned faintly. Nel had just found another massive knot along her spine, and she almost forgot the question entirely as long, powerful fingers, worked into it, relaxing her muscles with practiced ease.

"That feels so good, Nel..."

A playful growl vibrated through the body behind her, and she laughed again. Nel wasn't one to be easily distracted when she sensed something was wrong in her best friend's life. More and more lately she'd feel, rather than see or be told, when something was bothering Clair, and the same had held true for her gray-haired friend.

"Not really, to answer your question. I just don't enjoy having a teacher who knows less than his students. He's so much like my father at times."

The redhead smiled sadly. That would be the problem, then. Clair was just as stubborn as Adray, though more open-minded, and had the intelligence to back it up when they argued, just as he did, though in Adray's case, he would use his intelligence to try to force his view of the world on his daughter. If this teacher was arguing with her, but without the knowledge to make it worth her while, that might be enough to push even the gray-haired teenager's tolerance.

"Of course you know more than him, Clair. You're the smartest person I've ever met, and you read more than anyone I know. I think you've gone through the entire Castle library by now."

"You read almost as much."

"You're still smarter than me," Nel replied, chuckling softly, completely unashamed of being less intelligent than the pale-eyed teenager, "Everyone knows that. Why do you think all the guys are always hanging around you? You're the prettiest, nicest, smartest, and most patient person in the world."

Before Clair could reply, a knock came from the door. It was something of a relief, because she was too embarrassed to think of anything to say, but as soon as she got a look at the soldier standing in the doorway, her heart skipped a beat. There was only one reason a soldier fresh from the field would be there. She prayed mentally that it wasn't what she thought, but in the man's hand was the tattered remains of the cape Nel's father had worn, his personal crest visible on the clasp. She felt Nel start to tremble and turned, finding her friend looking deathly pale.

"I'm so sorry," the man said softly, his eyes wet and his body heavy with evident guilt, "but your father... your father fell in battle."

The redhead blinked slowly, and the gray-haired teenager turned, wrapping her arms around her. She didn't know what to do, what to say, but hoped she could somehow protect Nel from the pain that had to come. The redhead meant everything to her, and seeing her in so much pain was almost unbearable.

"Who... who struck him down?" Nel asked weakly, her voice trembling.

"Count Woltar of the Storm Brigade. He and your father were fighting, and Woltar killed him. I couldn't find his swords to give you, so I brought this. I'm so sorry."

Nel nodded, her expression blank as the man gently set the cape into her hands, squeezing them gently and left, saluting when he reached the door. Clair gasped when empty green eyes met her brown. She had never seen those vibrant orbs so dead, and never wanted to again. Her friend's eyes fascinated her, and to see them empty and dull was like a blow. Those eyes expressed so much, but right now, all she could see was pain, endless, crippling pain that she wanted to take away, to heal, more than she had ever wanted anything in her life.

"Clair... please tell me I'm dreaming, or that we can go back to a few minutes ago, and everything will still be fine. Just... just don't tell me this is real. Don't tell me my father... that my father..."

The slightly taller girl held her friend even tighter, not able to find anything to say that would ease the agony Nel was going through. Unlike her and Adray, Nel and her father were very close, and Clair loved the man dearly. He was strong, kind, intelligent, and noble, and without a doubt dedicated to his daughter. He had always treated Clair like family, and had told her he was glad she was there to take care of Nel when he couldn't. Now he was dead, and she felt it like a blow to the head.

"I've got you, Nel," she said at last, "and somehow, everything will be fine. I'll make sure of it. I've got you, and I'm not letting go."

"Everyone I love leaves, Clair," Nel whispered, leaning against her, "and you're the last person I've got that I call family. Are you going to leave me too?"

"Never," she replied fiercely, "I'll always be here for you. I don't care what it takes. I'm not leaving you alone, ever. I promise. Trust me. I'll find a way to make things right again. You'll always have me."

The redhead collapsed against her, crying desperately, clutching all that remained of her once invincible father. Clair was all she had left. Losing her too would kill her, she just knew it. She clung to her friend as if she was the only lifeline she had, which was true. If Clair left, she would be completely alone.

"Please don't leave me too," she sobbed, "I don't want to be alone. My parents, my family..."

"I'm still here," Clair whispered into her ear, rocking her gently, "I promise you, I always will be."

Nel cried and cried, swept up by her grief. Her father was dead, her mother long gone. She was the last of her family, the last of the Zelphers. This knowledge fell heavily across her shoulders, and only Clair's unwavering support and warm arms kept the weight of it from overwhelming her. Without Clair, this news would have broken her into tiny, irreparable pieces. Because of the girl's friendship and strength of heart and will, though, she found the tears slowing to a mere trickle. The pain was still there, as was the burden of knowing she was almost completely alone, but her spirit had found its anchor, a reason to survive no matter how bad things got, and for that, she would forever be in Clair's debt. She would do anything for the gray-haired teenager. She would fight and die for her, if that's what it took. She refused to let anything take her away.

(Flashback)

Not a month after that day, the young woman she had been had signed up for the armed forces. Clair had been with her through it all, even when she had shut down, building up walls around her heart so thick and tall that almost nothing could touch her. Her friend had been the only one who could reach her during that time, the only one she would respond to. When she had made the decision to go into the military, Clair had followed, despite a deep hatred of violence and war. Their unusual aptitude for runology had caused both of them to advance quickly, and they had become all the closer over the years of training.

'She was always there when I needed her, even if I thought I didn't. When I was hurt, she was the one who took care of me. If I was upset, or had nightmares, she comforted me. In return, I took care of her, too. If she had nightmares, I held her. If she was injured in training, I would tend to her. We were almost always together, and we may have argued, but we never really fought. Clair was always so patient with me, so gently and kind. I was always short tempered, but she took my outbursts in stride and soothed me if I was about to lose control. Whenever a student or instructor pushed me too hard, she was there to help. She let me fight my own battles, but did everything she could to keep me from going too far.'

She hung in the void, unaware of time, if it even existed here, if there was a 'here.' All of her focus was on the memories of Clair, and the warmth they brought. The memory had made her remember just what she was fighting and living for, and made her realize that she had always loved Clair, but had hidden those emotions so deep inside herself that she'd never realized what they were. She had done it to protect Clair, but now... The day her father had died was the start of the problems she was being forced to face now, but her runologist's love was starting to heal the scars that had been left behind. She was also an anchor to the reality she knew, and she was quickly coming to learn that her promise to Clair was more binding than she could have imagined. She would find a way to keep it, no matter the cost.

'Help me,' she found herself praying. This prayer was not to any gods, but to the only being she knew she could always trust in, 'I need your strength, your love, now more than ever. Guide me home. Help me get back to you. I refuse to accept this, for both of us. We exist. I exist, and so do you. Together we can defy the Creator, and anything else. Help me, Clair.'

Warmth flooded her, and she could almost feel arms wrapping around her, could almost see the beautiful face of her beloved, could almost touch the milky skin. Clair's spirit was with her, just as she had said it would be, and it was calling her home. She would not give in to the darkness. She would not be deleted.

"I WILL NOT LEAVE HER ALONE!" she suddenly shouted, and found her voice restored, along with her body. Everything was just as it should be, every scar in place, every wound just where it should be, though she wished some of those gained from the Spiral Tower and the battle with Luther had gone. She lived again as more than thought and spirit, but she could still feel the warmth of her beloved's spirit in her mind, and knew she had to get to her. Wherever she was now, Clair needed her to be on their world. Nel didn't know how she knew, but she did beyond a shadow of a doubt. Whatever this green world was, it wasn't where she had to be.

"Where... where am I?" she asked, noticing the others around her. She took stock, and realized she had been the first to appear, with Fayt being the last. The group talked, most of the discussion going over her head, so she ignored most of it. Only one thing caught her attention.

"Let's go back where we belong."

'I belong wherever Clair is. But... how do I get there? I don't even know where here is, so how can I figure out where to go, or how to get home? I just... I have to get to Clair, but I don't know how... Would they know? That seems unlikely.'

She felt something growing inside her, an almost desperate drive to get home, and felt her body fading again. She closed her eyes, though not before noticing Maria and Mirage join hands, a strange light covering them from within, and something similar happening to each one of them. Everything faded away, but then she opened her eyes only moments later to find her feet on solid, familiar ground.

"What..."

She looked around, trying to get her bearings, then her eyes widened. Arias... she was in Arias... and there, laying in bed with her back to her, was Clair. She stared at the gray-haired beauty, her body trembling and her hands wanting to reach out and touch the holder of her heart and spirit. She took a step forward, barely able to keep herself from caressing the milky skin.

"C-Clair... Clair, wake up... wake up..."

The spy's voice came out in a raspy stammer that was barely audible, but the runologist responded. She rolled over sharply, her eyes wild, taking in Nel's liberally blood-streaked form, the exhausted, uncertain set of her shoulders, and the dazed, confused expression on her face, then grabbed her, pulling her onto the bed, holding onto the swaying warrior. She may not have had any idea what was going on, but it was obvious that Nel needed help and support, which she was more than happy to give.

"Nel! You're home! How did you get here? What happened?"

The questions came out before she could stop them, while in the mean time she had gotten up to fill a pot to heat water and gathered several cloths to help get Nel cleaned up when the water was ready. These actions were automatic by now, requiring little to none of her attention, so she was able to stay mostly focused on her clearly disoriented friend.

"Clair... where am I? Is this Arias, or is it a dream? One minute I was nothing, then somewhere, then here... I don't understand..."

Pale brown eyes stared, startled, into green. The spy seemed to be in shock, her expression verging on panic, her eyes filled with an almost hysterical relief. The two extremes bothered her, not because Nel wasn't an emotional person, but more because she had a tendency to moderate herself, no matter who she was with.

"No," she replied slowly, "I don't think this is a dream. You're here. You're home. Can you tell me what's going on? How did you get here? Do you know?"

The Secret Legion commander shook her head slightly, some of the panic leaving her face as Clair rocked her gently, running one hand up and down her back while the other gently wiped at the blood on her face and body. She slowly relaxed against the other woman's body, her wounds and the chaos of the day catching up to her. She didn't know why she was in Arias, but she was grateful. This was, after all, her home, the one place she wanted most to be.

"I don't know," she answered at last, "First we were deleted by Luther, than we found ourselves in a great green plain, then I was here. It doesn't make any sense."

Pale brown eyes blinked slowly. Something about what Nel had just said had jarred her quite a bit, and she found herself badly in need of some sort of clarification.

"Wait... deleted? What does that mean? You died!"

Nel shook her head slightly. She still wasn't accustomed to thinking in terms of her world, her dimension, being a video game, and knew that she'd have some trouble explaining herself. She wasn't sure herself what being deleted entailed, and tried to find the words to allow them both to make sense of what had happened.

"Not really. I could still think, but I had no body. I seemed to be floating in oblivion. There was nothing there, just my thoughts and feelings. Before it happened, the others were talking about remembering those we loved, and I thought of you. When I was in the void, it was like you were there with me, calling me home. I remembered when we met, and the day my father died, and I knew I had to get back to you. You pulled me back, reminded me that there was somewhere I had to be. You saved my life."

Clair blushed faintly, smiling. She may not have understood that, but hearing Nel say she loved her was a powerful thing, and so was being told she had saved the spy's life. She was still wondering about this 'deletion,' but would let it go for the moment, for Nel's sake. The woman was obviously exhausted and somewhat shell-shocked. She held her old friend, letting her mind wander to the memories Nel had mentioned, then went through her own, remembering the first time she had had one of her really bad nightmares. It had been the first time she had stumbled into the redhead's bedroom, crying and trembling. She didn't realize that Nel was thinking of exactly the same night.

(Flashback)

An eleven-year-old Clair jerked awake with a start, crying out softly. She could barely remember the details of the nightmare she had had, but she knew she had watched her best friend die. She wasn't completely sure what had happened, but it had been painful, agonizing, rather, to watch, to hear.

'I have to see her... she's still alive... she has to be. There's no way she's not still alive... it was just a dream, nothing more. It's like dad always says: "Dreams are only real when you're dreaming." He has to be right about this. He has to!'

She slipped out of bed and grabbed a candle by its holder from her bedside table, grateful that her father was away. He wasn't very comforting, even when he tried to be, and he wasn't who she wanted to see in any case. He might even keep her from seeing her friend, and that would be horrible. If she remembered right, the other girl's father was gone too, so she would be able to get into their rooms without waking him. Clair walked slowly and unsteadily down the castle halls, quietly opening the door of her friend's family's suite and stumbling into her room.

"Nel... Nel, wake up... are you here?"

A small form on the bed shifted, groaning softly. Sleepy green eyes focused on her, their depths murky and tired. Bright red hair, just visible in the dim light of her candle, was sticking up in all directions, and a hand rose to brush it out of a round face.

"Clair?"

Nel yawned, slightly annoyed at being awakened, even by her friend, then looked more closely as the gray-haired girl moved slowly toward the bed. Clair's hair was a mess, as were her pajamas. Her eyes were bloodshot and her face was tear streaked, immediately jerking the redhead to full consciousness.

"Clair, what's wrong? Are you okay? Did something bad happen to you?"

The pale girl swayed unsteadily, fear and relief warring inside her. She knew that if she just reached out and touched her friend, she'd either disappear or prove that she was solid, real, and alive. She couldn't bring herself to do it, though. After all, if Nel vanished, she didn't know what she'd do. Nel was her best friend, the person she was closest to in her life, and the person her young heart and spirit called home.

"Nel, I... I had the worst nightmare just now. I... could I stay with you for a little while? I don't think I can get back to sleep..."

The more compact, though stronger, girl smiled softly, taking the candle from her and setting it aside. She pulled Clair into the bed, hugging her tightly. Her daddy had always said a hug could work wonders after a nightmare, something she had found to be true over time. Even without that, holding the thin, pale girl made her feel all warm inside, like nothing bad could ever happen. She loved that feeling, and besides, her friend obviously needed her comfort.

"It's okay, Clair. I've got you. You won't have any more nightmares tonight. I'll protect you and fight off the bad night demons that are after you."

"Promise?"

The redhead smiled again, covering the shivering girl with her blanket and pulling her close. Young as she was, she already knew that Clair was someone she couldn't live without, just as her friend did. She would do anything for her, even jump off a cliff if she asked her to. If the other kids tried to bully the frail child, she beat them up. She would do the same to any demon of the night that tried to hurt Clair in her sleep.

"Of course I promise. Go back to sleep, Clair. I won't let anything hurt you. You're safe here. I'll protect you."

Clair smiled softly, wrapping her arms around Nel and laying her head on her chest where she could hear the other girl's heart beating. The steady sound lulled her back to sleep, and she knew then and there that she would never let anything take the redhead away from her. Nothing, not even the gods, would tear them apart. She didn't know how she'd stop them, but she didn't care. Nel was all that mattered to her right then.

"I'm sorry I woke you up," she said softly into soft cloth, suddenly remembering how grumpy her friend could get when woken up, "but I had to see you."

The redhead shook her head slightly.

"Don't worry about everything so much. It's okay. I'm glad I could make you feel better."

Clair smiled again, relieved. She hadn't known if Nel would get angry, and she was very glad she hadn't. Her friend had a temper as fiery as her hair, but she realized that anger had never been directed her way. That was good, as she wouldn't want to make Nel mad at her if she could avoid it. She sleepily cuddled against her bedmate, her smile widening as she drifted into sleep, feeling safe, warm, and loved.

(Flashback)

Both women smiled, remembering, and when their eyes met, they laughed softly, knowing they had been thinking about the same thing. Clair wrapped an arm around her warrior for a moment, then helped her out of her belt, tunic, armor, leggings, and boots. She bandaged the various wounds with a silent promise to heal them later, helped the spy into a long nightshirt, then pulled her into bed, wrapping the covers around them. She found that they automatically shifted into the position they'd found themselves in twelve years ago, and smiled. She was incredibly worried, confused, and uncertain, but she knew that right now, they both needed rest more than answers, and getting upset would do absolutely nothing for either of them.

'She's wounded, exhausted, and not long ago she was on the verge of panic. Better to wait until later to try and understand what's going on. For right now, all I want to do is hold her and keep her here as long as I can. Anything and everything else can wait.'

Nel seemed to sense her reluctance to question her and gave her a relieved smile before leaning down to kiss her gently, one hand coming up to stroke the soft skin. She knew they were both too tired for it to go anywhere, but had needed the connection to reality, and to the love that had brought her back here. She felt so close to Clair, so bonded to her, heart, mind, body, and spirit. Just as the child she had been had, she found herself thinking with complete and utter confidence that she could never live without this woman. Everything else didn't matter, at least right now, as long as she had her beloved Clair. Tonight, she would rest, safe in the Shield Legion commanders arms. Tomorrow, they could deal with everything else.

"I love you, Clair," she whispered softly, tightening her grip slightly, "and it was your love that made it possible for me to survive deletion, to remember that I exist, independent of anything that Luther could do to me. You told me your spirit would be with me, and it was. All I could thing of was that I couldn't leave you alone, so I came back. I chose not to accept deletion. Thank you so much for lending me some of your strength, and for your heart. It's a gift beyond words or measure, a treasure beyond compare."

The runologist blushed, burying her face in Nel's chest. She would never get tired of hearing Nel say she loved her, and was glad for that. It was an amazing feeling when it happened, though it didn't hold a candle to the thrill she got when the spy kissed her. She felt her beloved chuckle softly and smiled up at her, ignoring her stubbornly prominent blush.

"Thank you, Nel. I'm glad I could help somehow. I'm so happy that you came back, even if I don't understand how you did it. All I care about right now is sleeping in your arms, basking in the love you've given me. You call my heart a treasure, but yours is a miracle, holding everything I could have ever asked for in this life. I'm so grateful you would entrust me with something so precious, and I swear I'll always handle it with care."

Before the redhead could say anything, she returned the gentle kiss, effectively silencing any objections her friend might have come up with. A soft sigh came from Nel when she pulled away slightly, and her calloused hand traced the outline of her lips, shaking slightly from a combination of shock, injuries, and sheer, unadulterated reverence and adoration. Warmth spread rapidly through both of them, soothing both physical and emotional aches and pains from the contact, and Nel relaxed fully into the slightly taller woman's tight embrace, just as Clair did the same. Tomorrow was another day, and inevitably would be one fraught with emotion, confusion, and strain, but this embrace, this little world that held only the two of them, drove all thoughts of worry out of their minds. This was how things should be, and all that mattered. Everything else could just wait a little longer. With a smile and another soft, meaningful kiss, they drifted off into the land of dreams, filled with light, love, and warmth, their spirits joined, and their hearts beating in perfect unison.

(Author's Note: To be continued… this is NOT the end, just so everyone knows. I haven't finished yet, by any means.)