Danny was on the veranda surrounded by empty bottles. As soon as Rosie and Charlotte were tucked up in bed he decided he needed a drink to try and chase away some memories which weren't leaving him alone! The ring! Why had he gave her the ring? He had often dreamed, 7 years ago about how she'd react when she saw it. It was usually accompanied by a happy memory but not now. He took a gulp of his beer and frowned when he realised there had only been half a mouthful left in the bottle. He dropped it onto the table and reached for another flicked the lid off. Why was this affecting him so much? It wasn't like he loved her! Love! He thought with derision, had he ever even loved anyone?
Miranda, he thought he loved her, she had been a monumental mistake, thankfully she had gave him his daughter which he was forever thankful for. That was it!
And Alice, he had loved her and she just left, for no reason. Bye bye Danny! He exhaled loudly. What did love do for you?
"Nothing!" he muttered shaking his head.
All love did was cloud your vision and made it impossible for you to see what was right in front of your eyes, and Danny wanted nothing more to do with it! He was washing his hands of it right now! Love didn't exist! He loved his kids and that was it! He couldn't love Alice anyway, coz he refused to love her. How could you love someone you don't trust? She had hurt him so badly when she left. What had hurt more than anything was that she had just disappeared - one day there and the next gone. That morning there had been nothing to make him suspect. She had been so excited about picking up her results. Of course she had been throwing up when he woke up, she had attributed that to stress but of course looking back it had nothing to do with stress and everything to do with Charlotte. She had kissed him before she left for her assignments. He had left for the call outs and that was the last he seen her. The pain had just got bigger and bigger everyday. It felt like he was gonna die on some days, and he hadn't really taken very good care of himself. He'd had no idea how to fix himself, he'd never felt anything of that magnitude before. She he went on with his life - without her. He drained the bottle he just opened. Dropped it to the table. It rolled and fell to the floor, he disregarded it. Began focusing on telling himself to stop thinking about Alice, he had already had far too much to drink tonight and destroying his liver wouldn't do anyone any good!
As he was focusing on blocking her out he began to realise how much he missed her. Then and now. He hated that he had missed out on her life. Charlotte too. He rested his head on his crossed arms. He wished he'd been beside her when she found out about their child. To share her happiness. To feel their baby kick. Scans. See her stomach grow larger as their baby grew. Then held her hand as she brought Charlotte into the word. His hands had fisted as he thought of that statement. All this stuff with Charlotte, lost time. Lost memories. Yeah he was here now but it was too late! He wanted memories like that with Alice. He lifted his head slowly as an idea came to him. Began to smile as images quickly accompanied it.
"Yeah this could work." he whispered.
Alice walked out onto the veranda. She frowned when she saw the empty bottles on the table….and floor actually. How many were there. She looked at Danny and could tell he was drunk. "Should you be drinking? You know with your meds?"
He shrugged and smiled at her, eyes glassy.
"I'll get you some coffee."
He shook his head. "Sit with me." he asked and patted the free chair.
"I'm just about to go down to the surgery. The girls are both asleep."
"Stop." he stood up and went to her. "There is something I need to ask you."
"Go on." she replied taking a few steps back and leaning against the veranda.
"It's about us being married." he elaborated.
She shrugged. "Fine."
"Alice, we have so much history…." Before she knew his intent he leaned in and kissed her. She pulled away. Not before she responded though.
"I told you not to do that!" she snapped.
"Why? I know you enjoyed it. You wanted it as much as me." smiled cockily.
"Erm no!" she spat and walked down the stairs.
He followed her grabbed her wrist. "I haven't asked you yet."
Alice was stood facing him, glanced at the place they had shared their first kiss behind him and gulped. Took a cautious step back. Without warning what he was asking hit her, she felt rage fill her! So that was why he wanted them to be married - he can go to hell! "IF it what I think then NO!"
He ran his thumb across her knuckles. "What do you think it is I want?"
"Using me whenever you feel the need? I'm pissed that you would think I would ever consider that!" she resisted the urge to shout knowing they had two sleeping children in the house.
"It's not that." he promised. "I would never ask you to do that."
She frowned. Felt her back lower as the indignation ebbed, it left confusion in it's wake. "What then?"
He looked at her, the moonlight playing across her face. It made her eyes sparkle. "Your beautiful." he felt his breath leave him in a rush and touched her cheek gently. "Years ago. Even more so now."
Alice closed her eyes and shook her head. "Danny your drunk." opened her eyes. "I don't wanna hear this."
He leaned in. She anticipated this time and dodged. "Kiss me."
"No." and moved again.
"Kiss me!" he repeated heatedly.
She put her hands on his chest and pushed him away. "There is no reason to, the kids know this isn't real! We don't have to act like we're attracted to each other!"
"I am attracted to you."
"So this wasn't brought on by you being drunk?
"No , it was brought on by me wanting another baby with you."
Her jaw dropped and words escaped her. "….what?" she squeaked. "I really didn't hear that did I?"
He nodded. "I thought about it."
"Ok, I've lost my mind." she muttered to herself.
"Look, before when we were together, it was just…..It's never felt like that before and expanding our family, it's just... I want to do it."
"That's the point Danny. We aren't a family! We aren't even married yet and we're planning a divorce!"
He grabbed her hand. "Let's stay together then. Think of it Alice, you me Rosie Charlotte and a baby. A proper family."
"So what you saying Danny?" she challenged. "Do you love me?" she asked knowing his reply.
He froze.
"See I know your plan. I get it! You want family but you won't allow yourself to love me."
"We loved each other before and it didn't do wither of us any good!"
"We aren't the same people!" she retorted.
"Alice I'll marry you, and I want a bigger family. But I won't love you." he exhaled. "I can't."
She shrugged. "I refuse to gave kids born out of anything but love. Rosie was. Charlotte was and if I have anymore they will be too. They deserve it!"
"That all you have to say?" he asked moodily.
"There is nothing left TO say!" she corrected.
"Fine!" he spat and stomped into the house.
A/N all this is gonna come to a head soon, maybe next chapter? or maybe not
Nearly fin writing this, i actually found some time to write recently WOW lol :)
i'm also gonna try and get a chap of opposites attract up 2nite - cnt promise anything tho x
