AN: More thanks to my lovely beta for putting up with me and my insecurities, assuring me that I actually can write Kurz despite my misgivings, being my muse, and being just plain AWESOME. *luv*
And more thanks to you reviewers, too *heart*
Aruiteku Together Forever – Chapter Twelve
Kaname bolted upright. She glanced around at the strange surroundings, wondering where exactly she was for a moment before she remembered. She was on Merida Island. Sousuke had carried her back to their new home from the cliff, since she had been tired and had not wanted to walk back. She must have fallen asleep on his back, since she did not remember getting into bed.
She looked around the small room and wondered where Sousuke was. She glanced down and noticed her Bonta-kun doll in her lap. She guessed Sousuke must have dug it out of a box just for her. The gesture made her smile; he can be so sweet sometimes. Kaname placed the doll on the pillow and slowly got up from the bed. Looking around, she noticed a note on the desk. Curious, she picked it up, unfolding it to see Sousuke's familiar scrawl.
Kaname- Went to report in. Be back by lunch. Call Mao if you need anything, you can find her number on the computer. –Sousuke
She sighed and put the note down, then looked around. The room was small - all it had was a cot-style bed, some cubbies above that, the small desk with the computer, a tiny kitchen, and an even smaller bathroom. Although, she had to admit, it was better than what they could have. They were making a special exception, giving her and Sousuke this room. If they hadn't, she would be living in barracks and would have to use an open shower. This way they at least had their privacy.
Figuring a shower might make her feel a little better, Kaname walked into the bathroom. As she stood under a stream of hot water, she let her thoughts wander. She was going to need to find some way to pass the time, because there was absolutely nothing to do in this room. She hoped she would be able to get books somehow at least. The computer was likely locked down, so she would not be able to use it casually. She had no doubts in her abilities to pass by those security systems, but she did not want to abuse her welcome.
Kaname got out of the shower and dried off, missing her hair dryer. She would have to find it later as a towel was hardly enough for her long hair. She stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her, kneeling down beside the bed to pull her bag from under it. After removing some clothes, she glanced around the room as she dressed.
She glanced at Sousuke's rifle case and a thought crossed her mind. Perhaps she could learn how to fish better, and she could probably cook the meals better than Sousuke would. Knowing him, he probably would just make a campfire on the spot and cook it like that, with no preparation except maybe removing the scales. The thought made her smile and shake her head. Fish would probably get tiring after some time, but at least learning how to prepare different kinds of meals with fresh fish would give her something to do.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Kaname felt loneliness swamp over her. This was miserable, trapped in a small room with nothing to do, no one to talk to. The note said to call Mao if she needed anything. Granted, this was Sousuke, and everything he said always sounded more severe than it should, but she did not want to bother the woman if she was busy. She remembered Sousuke telling her that Mao had been promoted. That probably meant she was busy with paperwork and talking to personnel, and whatever else a lieutenant might need to take care of.
Growling, she kicked her bag, which she had left beside the bed. Going to Merida had been her idea, so she really needed to just suck it up and get over it. Fine, so she was going to be lonely, so what? She knew that when she made the decision. No sense crying over it, she had done enough of that. Kaname stood up and marched into the kitchen. She really hoped there was food – real food, not the crap Sousuke called food. When she opened the refrigerator, she was pleased to see something she could work with.
Next, she checked to make sure she even had the tools to cook with. Someone had anticipated this and stocked the kitchen with nearly all of her culinary needs. She cheered up a little and set to work making a small meal that would keep well enough. Unsure of what constituted 'lunch' to an on-duty Sousuke; she figured she could make something now so it would be ready whenever he got back. Soon enough she would learn when he would be around for meals, she guessed.
Kaname made the meal and packed up Sousuke's portion, then settled down to eat her own. If she hadn't been so hungry, or so unsure of when he would return, she would have waited for him. Clean up was quick and easy as well and she found herself at loose ends again. She could hunt through the boxes for a book, but she did not feel as though she had the patience to read at the moment.
The sound of the door opening prevented her from needing to figure something out. She heard Sousuke's voice and it seemed he was talking to someone. Wondering who it could be, she stepped out of the kitchen. Sousuke was holding the door for Tessa; both of them wearing their uniforms. Kaname put on a brave smile, though it was obviously forced, and walked up to them, "Hi, Tessa. Welcome back Sousuke," she gave her boyfriend a hug and kiss.
She knew it was petty. Tessa had obviously already conceded defeat since she had given them this room together, but she felt the need to make it clear Sousuke was hers. Kaname had always been a little insecure, no matter what she acted like, and recent events had made her feel even more so. Sousuke would never betray her, but she still didn't want any girls to even try. Just in case.
Sousuke and Tessa both knew what she was doing, too. Tessa tried not to let it bother her. She really had accepted their relationship, and she knew that Kaname would be on the defensive, though it irked her that the girl would still do that in front of her. Sousuke was torn between not wanting to offend his captain and not wanting to disappoint his girlfriend. Kaname won out quickly, but he felt a little guilty since he did know how Tessa felt. He wrapped his arms around Kaname and kissed the top of her head, "I'm sorry you had to wake up alone. How are you feeling?"
"Better than yesterday, I suppose," she sighed and burrowed her face in his chest, clinging on to him. "I, ah, made you lunch, if you're hungry. I didn't know we would have guests, but I can make you something, too, Tessa," she pulled back from him and smiled at the other girl. It was her way of apologizing - Kaname had such a difficult time with actually saying the words 'I'm sorry.'
Tessa returned the smile and nodded. "That would be wonderful, Kaname-san, I have heard that your cooking is quite good. Better than Mr. Kalinin's borscht, I hope!"
Sousuke coughed at that and shook his head, trying not to shudder at the memory. "Yes, I assure you, her cooking is far superior to Kalinin's."
Seeing Sousuke's reaction, Kaname wondered if she should be insulted. Tessa was probably just trying to make a joke, but whether it was supposed to be a jab at her - a way of saying she had things she shared with Sousuke that Kaname didn't - or if she was just trying to cheer Kaname up, the reason was suspect. Not really wanting to know which it was, Kaname just walked back to the kitchen to prepare food for Tessa and to heat up Sousuke's meal.
Sousuke showed Tessa into the kitchen and motioned for her to take a seat at the small table before he took one for himself. He watched Kaname as she cooked, and as always the sight relaxed him, even though he had somewhat bad news for the girl. He hated that he had to tell her she would be spending a lot of time alone for the next couple of weeks, but he understood the reasoning. His senses had dulled from peaceful Tokyo; he needed to be worked back into proper shape - that meant sun-up to sun-down training and more. Even now, he had only come because he was to escort Tessa over; he had to report in immediately after he ate.
Kaname set the food in front of the two, poured tea for herself and Tessa, and then sat down. She set her head in her hands with her elbows propped up on the table, and looked between the two. Sousuke went at his food quickly, causing Kaname to raise an eyebrow curiously. "Where's the fire, soldier?"
He gulped his mouthful and washed it down with water before replying, "I have to return and report in for training. Clouseux is going to run me through some harsh AS training for the next couple of weeks."
"Oh. I guess then, you, ah, won't be around much?" Kaname sounded sad and she dropped her gaze to the table.
Sousuke held back a sigh, "I'm sorry, Kaname. I really need this. I've gotten soft, even my calluses have been fading. That's not a good thing."
Kaname just nodded sadly, and when Sousuke finished his food she grabbed his plate and stood up to wash it. He was going to object, but she fluttered her hand at him without turning around and spoke with a deadpan voice. "I can take care of this; you go have fun playing with your giant robots."
"Kaname-san, that's hardly fair! If Sagara-san doesn't get this training, he has a high risk of dying on even a routine mission," Tessa thought that might help, but Sousuke just shook his head at her.
"It's all right, Madam Captain. I'm the one being unfair. Leaving her to have so much time alone, and just after we left Tokyo," he trailed off, watching Kaname's back as she washed the dishes. She was furiously scrubbing away, biting her lip, fighting back tears he could tell. He walked over to her kissed her cheek, though she didn't respond to him at all. "I am sorry, Kaname. I love you," he turned and left, saying a quick goodbye to Tessa before running out the door.
Tessa stood up and brought her own plate over to be cleaned, standing next to Kaname patiently. Kaname was still washing the same dish, even though it was obviously clean. Eventually, Tessa placed her hands gently on the other girl's and looked up at her. "Kaname-san, why don't you sit down? I'll take care of these and then we can talk."
Kaname wanted to object, but she had no energy. She had been trying to keep herself at least somewhat optimistic but Sousuke's news just made her miserable again. Wearily, she complied, dropping the plate and walking over to the table, not even stopping to dry her hands. Tessa yelped when she grabbed the plate in the sink, and immediately dropped it. She quickly turned the temperature of the water down and looked down at her pink hands in shock for a moment. "Kaname-san, aren't your hands burnt?"
"Huh, oh, no, they're fine," that was a blatant lie, but it was obvious the girl did not care. Tessa tentatively began washing the dishes. She would have to find something for Kaname to do immediately, or else the girl could do some serious harm to herself. She doubted that Kaname would ever purposefully hurt herself, but with things like the hot water, she could wind up damaging herself with her lack of caring.
Tessa shook her head at the situation. She had always thought of Kaname as such a strong girl, stronger than her even. She was by no means weak, she did run an assault submarine after all, but she had her moments. She did not think Kaname had those moments, although she had to admit, being turned away by the people who were supposed to be her friends had to be painful. Though not quite on the same level, the only thing Tessa could compare such pain to would be if her crew was to mutiny. That would be a very emotionally trying experience and she would find herself facing a lot of self-doubt, which must be how Kaname was feeling at the moment.
She finished the dishes and dried her hands, staring at the wall thoughtfully while she did so. She remembered something Kaname had told her when they had been captured by the group A21.
"When I came back to Japan from New York, I transferred into a local middle school. From my time in America, I got into the habit of saying exactly what I meant. I suppose it must happen a lot, but, well, my classmates didn't like it. I'm sure I deserved it sometimes, but still… I really wanted to die," her tone made it seem like she already had.
That Kaname reminded her of the Kaname that was sitting at the table now. A girl who wanted to be dead and who felt dead already, but would fight her depression and what made her feel that way the moment she was given a chance. At least, Tessa hoped Kaname had not lost all of her spirit, and that she would fight against her negative feelings.
Tessa put down the towel and took her seat again. She gave Kaname an encouraging smile, holding her cup of tea up to her mouth with both hands. The look was part of Tessa's classic charm, and it did help Kaname cheer up a little, being smiled at by such a remarkable girl. She managed a small, trembling smile in return. "Where do you want to begin, Kaname-san?"
Kaname sighed and tilted her head back to stare up at the ceiling blankly. After a few moments, she shrugged and looked over at Tessa again. "I don't know, Tessa. I really just don't know."
"All right, well, why don't you tell me about what happens when you hear the Whispers, and how often, and such, that'll give me a place to begin for helping you," Tessa put her cup down, now with a serious expression. This topic really was too serious for anymore smiles.
Kaname nodded slowly, and looked thoughtful, as though trying to figure out how to put her thoughts into words. "It used to be really common. I would wake up feeling tired, and as though I were floating, in class, especially math and science, I would come back to myself at the end to find all sorts of formulas scribbled in my notebook. If I tried to make sense of them afterwards, I always got that floating feeling again, as though I were losing myself, so I stopped. I, ah, did save them, though, if you want to take a look?"
"In a little while, let's keep working on this first," Kaname nodded and looked relieved at Tessa's words. "You said it used to be common. What happened?"
"Oh, that," Kaname blushed. "Well, when Sousuke and I, ah, started getting close, that is, ah, when we fell asleep together," she shook her head and took a deep breath to steady herself. "When Sousuke held me while I slept, I woke up really refreshed for the first time. I don't know why but for some reason being with him kept the Whispers away. It seemed like the more time I spent in really close contact with him, the more they stayed away.
"Maybe it's because I had gotten so used to not dealing with them anymore, but something in science class triggered it bad. I really lost myself for awhile, twice. I don't even remember what was being discussed in class since I hadn't been paying attention."
Tessa nodded slowly, twirling her hair thoughtfully and poking the corner of her mouth with it every so often. "I can't really say why it is you would suddenly get such a strong reaction. Unless something that either was being discussed, or something you thought of was really close to wherever your specialties lay. Do you know what your specialties are, Kaname-san?"
Kaname shook her head, "Not at all. Maybe it has something with the Lambda Driver? Although I can't imagine anything in class would have been remotely close to that, and I definitely wasn't thinking about anything that should have triggered anything."
"What were you thinking about?" seeing the faint blush on Kaname's face made the question irresistible. She could guess, especially with the even darker red color spreading across her face now. Tessa giggled a little before shaking her head, "No, never mind, that's all right. You don't have to answer that question."
Feeling a little wicked now, Kaname put on her best cat-in-vat-of-cream look and purred, "Are you sure, Tessa? It might prove educational," Tessa blushed furiously, but managed to put on a thoughtful look, as though she were considering it. Finally, Kaname couldn't take it anymore, and she burst out in a fit of giggles. Tessa at first worried if the girl was having hysterics, but Kaname's mirth was contagious, and she found herself laughing as well.
After some time they stopped, both wiping tears from their eyes. Kaname smiled brightly at Tessa, "Thank you! I really needed that."
Tessa smiled back and nodded, "Yes, I think I did too. Thank you, Kaname-san."
Kaname stood and stretched, then looked around for a moment. "Why don't we sit on the bed? It's more comfortable than these chairs," Tessa had to agree, and she also stood up so she could join the other girl. In the main room, Kaname was rummaging through a few boxes, intermittently uttering curses as she took longer and longer to find what she was looking for. Finally, she let out a triumphant shout and pulled out a thick binder. She brought it over to the bed and sat down, patting the spot next to her as an indication for Tessa to sit down.
Tessa took the offered seat, and looked curiously at the binder. Kaname handed it to her, "These are those formulas I told you about. I always tore them out of my notebooks whenever it happened, and saved them. Throwing them out just didn't seem right. I guess I was just saving them for you, really. Someone who could make sense of them, and, maybe, if there's something in there that can help Sousuke…?"
"Of course, Kaname-san, if there's something in here that can help Sagara-san, and we can produce it, we will. I used to be in the R&D department, so I still have connections over there," she smiled sweetly and took the binder, settling it in her lap. She flipped it open and looked through the formulae. Occasionally she would whisper things, as though working through what was on the paper. Kaname felt envious. Tessa had been used to her Whispered traits for so long, that she could use her innate knowledge so casually, without losing herself.
She watched Tessa's face as the girl flipped through the pages. Towards the end, seeing the more recent of the formulae, her eyes widened, and she looked up at Kaname in shock. Kaname was taken aback, and she averted her gaze and laughed nervously, "Tessa? Tessa, what is it?"
"There is something in here that can help Sagara-san, but…," she trailed off, and then glanced back at the pages thoughtfully. She flipped through to the end and shook her head. Kaname was getting anxious, and she started tapping her foot. Getting the hint, Tessa looked back up at her. "It isn't finished. It isn't something I can finish, either, it has to be you."
Seeing the intense look in Tessa's eyes, she nodded immediately. "Just tell me what to do," Kaname felt her strength returning. She had knowledge that could help Sousuke! That meant the world to her, and if it would be put to work for him, she would do anything to finish those plans.
"Tomorrow, I'll introduce you to some people. We've been working on a new Arm Slave in the ARX system. The AI in the Arbalest, Al, has been helping with the plans, as well as another Whispered girl. Her name is Sarah Miller. She was recovered two weeks before Sagara-san was given the mission to guard you. When she recovered from the mental anguish she had suffered, the first thing she said she wanted to do was develop something for the person who saved her from the Hind. That was Sagara-san. This system that you've started building will go very well in the ARX-8, and I think it will suit Sagara-san perfectly."
Kaname nodded slowly, realizing that what Tessa was telling her must be top secret. She doubted Sousuke knew about this plan. If he did, he probably would be angry, not appreciative, but if he had to be stuck as the only one to operate the Lambda Driver, she wanted him to have the best. She guessed Tessa felt the same, too. "Well, stop leaving me in suspense, Tessa! What is it?" Tessa smiled, and the two put their heads together conspiratorially. Tessa worked on showing Kaname about the Whispered state late into the night.
Sousuke leaned against the wall in the shower room, letting the warm water slide down his body and soothe his muscles. His arms felt raw, and he even had skin peeling in some places. He had not suffered such injuries from piloting an Arm Slave since he was ten and just learning. He was disgusted with himself for it; he never should have let such a thing happen.
Loud voices sounded outside and he groaned. He did not want to deal with people, particularly not when he was in such a pathetic state. Sousuke hoped they were people that knew him. He had enough problems with people on base thinking he was just a kid and had no right fighting beside them, and in the most powerful unit in all of Mithril. Him standing under the water like a new recruit, with the skin on his forearms peeling from a day of operating the Arbalest, it was such a hopeless sight.
The men entered, and he almost sighed in relief. Kurz, Yan, Wu, and a few other mixed Special Response and Primary Response that knew Sousuke was more than capable on the field walked in. They all claimed their own showerheads, laughing and joking with each other. Sousuke was not one to join them in such antics, but now he found that he could not even if he wanted to. He was in too much pain. The thought that a day of harsh maneuvering in his military uniform instead of a pilot suit would have made him at least a little tired even at his best did not provide much consolation.
Clouseux had ordered Sousuke not to change into the suit. He had seen Sousuke's arms and knew they needed some work. By the end of the day it had been perhaps too much work, and his next day would be spent on foot. He just hoped his body wasn't too weak to handle it. He growled and banged his head on the tile behind him, frustrated with his weakened state.
Kurz, who was next to him, looked concerned. "Hey buddy, what's wrong?"
Sousuke shook his head and pushed himself off the wall, twisting the knob to shut off the water. Kurz looked after him when he left to dry himself off and change. "What's wrong with Sagara?" that was Yan. He glanced at Kurz curiously. He liked Sousuke well enough, even after the incident in Hong Kong, and it worried him that the boy seemed out of it again.
"Who knows? Probably has something to do with Angel," he didn't really sound like he believed it himself. Kurz finished his shower quickly and ran to catch up with Sousuke. Not that he really had needed to hurry. Sousuke was still in the changing room, sitting on a bench half-dressed. He had put his arms through their holes in the t-shirt, but that was as far as he'd gotten with the garment. He was hanging his head, and it looked to Kurz as though he were gasping for breath and sweating.
"Sousuke, really, what's wrong?" he sounded genuinely concerned. Sousuke was moody enough, but Kurz had been fighting beside him long enough to know when to be completely serious. "Something is bothering you, man, I can tell. So tell me. We're friends, right?"
Sousuke was silent for a few moments, before he spoke in a strained voice, "Help me get this shirt on."
Kurz raised an eyebrow, but walked over to his friend to do as requested. When he got the shirt over Sousuke's head and saw the kid's arms, he let out a gasp. "Shit! What the hell happened to you?"
He shook his head and groaned as he worked the shirt on. "I'm pathetic. I can't believe I let my body get so weak. What a stupid, reckless, idiotic thing to do."
Eyeing Sousuke critically for a moment, Kurz spoke up, "Nah man. What the hell were you going to do? Find someone to give you Indian Sunburns for hours on end to keep your calluses?"
"What the hell is an 'Indian Sunburn' Weber?" that let Kurz know he was feeling really annoyed. They were friendly enough that Sousuke actually called him by his first name, but he always got formal whenever he was pissed. He didn't take it personally though, not this time.
"I'd show you, but I don't feel like letting you bleed on me. Some other time maybe," he grinned and winked at Sousuke, who just growled in response. "Hey man, what are you, some kind of wild dog or something? Chill."
Sousuke stood up and started walking out of the locker room. Kurz shouted after him and ran to get dressed quickly before Sousuke could get too far. He caught up with Sousuke rather quickly, and grinned. "I figured I'd give you a ride to your little home, Sousuke! Unless you really want to walk all those kilometers with the way you're feeling, and when you have to get up so early!"
"Fine," Sousuke sighed, stopped walked for a moment and looked at Kurz, then nodded. "Thank you. That would be a big help."
Happy to have gotten through even just a little, Kurz reverted to his less serious nature. "Of course it would! And on the drive over, you're going to tell me all the details of you and Angel's relationship, yes? I mean, it's practically required!"
"Kurz," Sousuke spoke warningly, but he was back to using his first name. Kurz wasn't worried.
"You can't tell me that after living with such a hot babe for – what, seven months? – that you still haven't done the deed! I won't believe it! Not even you, Sergeant Somber, could be that stupid."
Sousuke shook his head and sighed, clambering into the vehicle when they got to it, moaning as his stiff muscles rejected the movement. He hoped Kaname was over her anger enough to give him a massage when he got back. Assuming she was even awake, considering how late it was. "I'm not going to talk about my sex life with you, Kurz."
"Ooh, but you admit that you do have one?" he smirked, feeling like he was finally getting somewhere.
"As you said, not even I'm that stupid," Sousuke spat out the words, showing his distaste for being called stupid. Kurz chuckled and apologized in his usual flippant manner. The rest of the drive was in silence, Kurz not wanting to push his luck with a tired and cranky Sousuke.
When they arrived, Kurz parked outside and grinned, "Want me to open the door for you, princess?" Sousuke let out a colorful string of curses in various languages, only a handful of which Kurz could understand. "Hey man, seriously now, take care of yourself. Don't you over do it just because you feel like you have to get there quickly or something. If you injure yourself training too hard, then you're really going to feel like a fool."
Sousuke looked thoughtfully at him before nodding, "I'll keep that in mind. Thank you for the ride, Kurz," he closed the door and walked into his quarters stiffly. During the drive, his muscles all felt as though they locked up, and any amount of moving was distinctly unappreciated.
He paused in the doorway and blinked at the sight before him. He turned and motioned Kurz not to leave. The blond put the car into park and hopped out, walking over to him. He peered over Sousuke's shoulder and let out a quiet laugh at what he saw. "Isn't that just precious," on the bed were Tessa and Kaname, a binder had been dropped carelessly on the ground, and the girls were curled up on the bed snoring softly.
"Will you take the captain back, Kurz?"
"Can I wake her up?"
"Do as you like, just make it fast," he wasn't trying to be rude, he just really needed to lie down. Kurz decided to be sympathetic to his friend, and just gently shook Tessa's shoulder instead of doing something like dump water on her. Both girls stirred and blinked sleepily.
"Mr. Weber?" Tessa yawned and stood up. "Mr. Sagara, I'm so sorry!" she switched to English, her native language, since she was so tired. Sousuke just nodded respectfully to her while Kurz gently led the girl out, deciding not to take any longer than necessary.
When Kaname made a comment about him not being his usual self, Kurz just grinned and winked at her, "It's not as much fun when you're too tired to fight back." Kaname had just shaken her head and flopped back on the bed with a sigh while Tessa made some weak objections.
After they had left, Sousuke sat down on the bed with a groan. He looked down at his tired girlfriend with a pleading expression. "Is there any chance I could get a massage, Kaname?"
