Disclaimer: Same old, same old. You should google teetotalism.
CHAPTER TWELVE – TEETOTALISM
"Helia, I always knew you had a thing or two for me." I smirked. Helia looked at me as if I had said he was gay. Ironically, that was exactly what I was hinting at.
"Excuse me?" he asked in a incredulous tone. I motioned towards the retreating figure of Flora.
"You were eyeing my body with those undressing eyes."
Helia scowled and looked away. I cheered and amused myself at finding something to tease him about as revenge for all the past teasing I had gotten from him. I waited for him to vehemently deny my claim, but it never came. Helia did the unexpected, the unprecedented.
"You are right," he started, a wide smile stretching across his face in a disturbing manner, "I did." He paused for a dramatic effect and to watch my horrified expression.
Helia wasn't serious was he? But, he didn't stutter or divert his eyes, giveaways to show that you are lying.
"Lying."
"Try me."
Helia was…gay? Of course. Everyone fell into place. I knew that no straight guy could have such silky hair. So Helia liked me. Damn. It wasn't even April Fools.
Helia continued when I saw my speechlessness. "I've always been attracted to you but you've always been so aggressive. Now that Flora is in your body, maybe I will have a chance with your…flesh." He glanced at me with lewd eyes.
"Helia, you—you better not do anything to her! I know my body is attractive, but it is my holy, sacred, untouchable, damn body."
"And if I don't? It's hard to resist that toned body of yours."
I growled in the lowest voice I could manage and glared at him with malice, hoping that my murderous look would make up for the strength I lacked in my current body. Unfortunately, I probably came off as a hissing kitten rather than a vicious lion
Helia grinned. "Calm down. I was just kidding. I'm such a great actor aren't I?" Incredulity erupted. Helia pointed at me and burst out laughing. "I can't believe you bought that."
"Whatever."
Note to self: Never trust Helia with his unreadable face again.
"It wasn't all a lie though"
"You're gay?" Helia rolled my eyes, probably annoyed at my insistency on the fact.
"No."
"Bi?"
"No."
"…Pedophile?"
"No."
"…Animals?"
"…That's just sick and insulting. I was staring at Flora with…" Helia trailed off, trying to come up with the right word. His eyes wandered off as he thought.
"Undressing."
"Longing eyes," Helia swiftly corrected.
I stared at him, emotionless and empty eyed before breaking out in a laugh. "Don't tell me you think Flora in a guy body is attractive."
"I do." I froze. "I think she is my first love."
There were two things Helia could have meant with that response. Perhaps he meant that he had just fell in love for the first time in twenty-three years with Flora. That would explain why he never expressed explicit interest in girls.
Maybe he meant that Flora was a girl from his past, a childhood first who captured his heart in the springtime of blossoming youth.
Or maybe he was just screwing with me.
"How?"
"It's complicated." Helia ran his hand through his luscious hair, calmly explaining with a sick, dreamy, passionate fire in his eyes.
"And…you just realized she was your first love when…"
"When she told me her mother's name."
"What the—"
"Like I said, it is complicated, but I'm glad I found her."
I sighed when I witnessed Helia fly off to honeymoon planet, the destination for unfortunate individuals struck by cupid's arrow.
"Stop dude. No more about your love life. Anyways, have you guys planned on how to deal with the band's schedule yet?"
Helia snapped out of his disturbing love state. If Helia and Flora became the next Brandon and Stella when they hooked up, I was not going to look forward to the future.
"I've given Flora the new schedule already. All performances, interview, and events involving you were cancelled, and it wasn't easy. I had to inform Sky about the situation so he could help cancel. He's been extra busy with work lately, which is why he isn't here for the party."
I let out a sigh. "This event probably stained our reputation," I muttered in frustration, mussing my soft hair angrily, knowing that I held myself responsible for the "event". How should I have known that one wrong turn would screw up my life?
"Anyways, enough of that. Guess who is back?"
"Who? Your hippie of a father?"
Ever since Helia came into the world, his parents would sporadically leave and travel around the world, claiming that it was part of their job, and that traveling fueled their creative muse. Their travel addiction resulted in Saladin raising Helia up from childhood and close relationship between the two. But that wasn't who had returned.
"No, Tecna." AKA the feared debt collector.
"That woman is here to collect her annual share of debt again?" I exclaimed with scorn.
Helia nodded. "With interest."
"How gay." My face darkened and I diverted my stare to a bottle of wine.
"You are having fun calling everyone gay tonight aren't you? Sky told me that she told him that she would postpone the deadline if she got a position on the judge panel for the new show so—what the heck are you doing?"
I was in the middle of pouring wine into a glass before met Helia's confused glare. "Pouring a glass. I don't see what is wrong with Tecna getting a spot as a judge."
"I don't either but you know that analytical woman. Everything she does has a purpose so and Sky doesn't know what she wants. That is why he hasn't accepted her offer yet," Helia continued, still giving me uncomfortable glances. "By the way, I don't think you should drink."
I paused as I lifted glass to my lips and got a whiff of the fruity wine.
"You've never stopped me before. Hell, you invited me to drink."
"That was back when you were in your body. Now you are in Flora's body, which has never consumed a single drop of win. You'll get drunk if you drink so much all of a sudden."
I rolled my eyes at Helia. I wasn't that big of an idiot to over drink.
"Look. I'll just take a sip at first and if I still feel fine then I'll drink more."
"…Ok."
I took a quick sip of the wine and savored its bitter taste for a moment or two.
"Look, I'm totally fine. You were worrying way to muuucccch," I slurred. Why was Helia swaying so much and why where the walls closing in? I rubbed my eyes. "Stop moving so much Helia." Then swayed to my right.
"Dude. You are drunk."
"Nah!" I blasted waving my hands as I tried to get my balance. "Stop being so gay."
As fast as I regained my balance I lost it. I watched as the ground came to meet me. Luckily, I managed to regain my balance in the nick of time, but I couldn't stop myself from staggering over to Stella, gruntiing when she squealed.
"Riven! You're drunk!" she yelled.
"No! I am fairy from Wasbsadfasy! I'm Princess Fifi dammit!" I said while falling to my knees. "Shalalalala! My OH my! Looks like the boy's too shy! Ain't gonna kiss the girl!" I felt a hand grab my arm and by instinct, and looked up.
Oh look! It's a pretty black-haired lady!
And for some reason, I planted a big, fat smooch on the lady's lips before my body fell the ground with a thud.
ººº
I woke up to a massive hangover and the sound of something sizzling. As I pushed myself up from the bed while clutching my throbbing head, I noticed that I was back home. What the hell had happen?
I took a sip, fell to the ground, and now I'm in bed.
Obviously someone had brought me back here. Was it Flora?
Despite my massive headache, I managed to crawl out of bed with legs made of jello and tried to make my way to the kitchen for a glass of water. When I got there, Flora stood at the stove cooking some eggs.
"You're up early. Let me get a glass of water for you." When Flora handed me a long glass of water, I ravenously downed it all in one shot before asking for more. "You sure are sweating a lot."
"I feel awful," I mumbled and downed another glass of water before feeling my stomach churn.
I made a mad dashed for the restroom and threw the contents of my stomach, and returned feeling even more dehydrated.
While washing my hands, I caught a glance of myself in the mirror. Across from stared a miserable woman.
"I look awful too," I muttered before splashing water on my face then going back to the kitchen to try to eat something.
"You ok sweetie?" Flora looked worried.
"Fine." My response came out weaker than I had wanted it to and even I was surprised by laziness in my voice. "I just hate this defective body of yours that gets a hangover from a drop of wine."
"Oh thanks. Here are some eggs," Flora said as she set the plate of fresh food in front of me. "I'll drive you back after you eat."
"My car?"
"I drove it back last night."
Surprisingly enough, being in debt to Flora seemed normal by then. I snapped my eyes back to Flora and studied the lady, or guy, for a second like as puzzle.
What was different about Flora compared to othr women? Well, she was definitely more submissive compared to Layla and she could cook on a daily basis. She was patient and kind. Flora was a quintessential housewife.
Flora, the perfect housewife, fidgeted under my intense stare. "Is everything all right?"
"I'm just thinking that your husband would have a really good housewife." Flora blushed. I realized my slip of my mouth and quickly tried to make a save, "I mean, a good...lousy wife. Yea, the best lousy wife there is."
"I see," Flora replied with a disappointed frown as she went back to the stove. A pang of guilt ran through me as the image of her frown resonated within me.
Why did I randomly think of her as a married woman?
Summer is giving more more time to write. These chapters are coming out faster. Too bad next week I have to start classes again.
I eat reviews. Yum.
