XI:CHOICE

While Takatori had Ban and Ginji both controlled and humiliated at the outside, Hevn remained unresponsive as she and Kagami were just patiently waiting in the inside of the room.

Or rather, Kagami was patiently waiting for the whole show to end while Hevn, supposedly unconscious, was more than willing to live up to her role as an angry victim and remained vacant while impatiently waiting for all of this to finally end.

Kagami's previous actions and plot had of course, naturally drove her wild to her wits at first. She was more than shell-shocked; her nerves were already on edge at her situation with Ban and being threatened a second after by another strong and uncompromising character is just too much for her to bear, experienced mediator she may be or not.

All in all, it would just all boil down to one thing that she was not earlier informed for the actions done were in haste and yes, it was an answer to her urgent, anguished plea.

Although she would've suggested that Kagami be a little more controlled next time, considering the slight bruise she's having near her neck.

No. No. No. She'd rather not have a next time altogether

She had just shut herself out from the rest of the outside world. Just as what she'd always do every time she meets up with her lifetime soul-mate: trouble.

Deep inside her subconscious, she could hear the faint and sweet notes of the Satie as it calms her frazzled heartbeats, promising sweet nothings, gently taking away all her problems away. But always, just as always, when the crescendo gets it tempo to the farthest, she would slip and fall way over and over the edge again, and she'd go back to once she were, back to meeting trouble more than halfway again.

This would always be her fate, unless mere imagination of notes would become a reality as she would hear her beloved song be played again. To be granted of such a lifelong request would be more than infinite grace.

She would have loved to hear Ban play the song with his violin, and have the tune be caught forever inside her. But she knew that to ask such from a man is just too much. Especially after what has just happened right now.

And she knew that even if she did hear the song again, nothing will still ever change for her.

Deep inside, she was weeping all over again. Ban's right after all. They shouldn't really be used like that. They should really be told the truth.

But there are truths which are best hidden.

It really hurt a lot to know that they're trampled and humiliated as of the moment. Heaven and the whole of the earth must have known how much she wanted to stop it all. They were, of course, her friends, even if they did not know it. And all she ever wanted was to pay them all back for whatever financial shortcomings she had with them, and stop from there. She never imagined that the job would interest them other than the money, to the point that they'd know a dangerous part of the truth. To have them tangled in her situation would be completely destroy her once again. But they are just so stubborn and determined to know everything and she was left with no choice but go with Takatori's plan of action.

The song plays again. How much more until he would finally end her suffering?

How much more will he be willing to go?

How much more can she take it?

How much more until he will have the compassion to rest until the time comes?

Now. She must end all of it now.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

He knew that he is simply an observer, and that he must do nothing more than what he is tasked to do. But seeing Hevn's present situation finally did it. He was never an observer as far as Hevn is concerned.

But now, impassive to Hevn or not, he had shattered. After such a long time, the passive observer finally had shattered. Her distress had pained him a lot. Because it is true after all. And even if he had shattered, he knew that she had all the right to really feel distressed the way she wanted it to be.

But no matter how many times she did those, he would always find himself going back to her. For no matter how scathing the words she said may have been, he knew she never really meant them. For no matter how many times she would offer him her cold shoulders, he knew that it was nothing but simply an act of protection for him. And he knew that no matter how much she'd try to push him away from her life forever, they both knew that they each have been a very important part of each other's life ever since.

But he didn't need those. He needed her back.

He just can't help it but miss the old Hevn he knew, the Hevn who easily gave her warm-hearted smile to the people around her, even to someone as notorious as him then. He had missed the old Hevn who was the only friend that he had ever made. The only person he has ever trusted completely. The only person who had understood him completely.

Thinking of that only source who had changed her would only anger him more. He wanted to kill him. Hevn would've had a happier life right now if not for him. She would've not felt all the anguish he'd seen in her now if it were not for him.

But no matter how hard he tried to destroy him, he would only end up being saved by his mercy. He had done everything already to protect her, but they never worked out. All his life he has tried to protect her, to show her that he cared for her more than what she could accept, and she kept brushing him away. He saved her, and she's angry for his attempts. He insulted her, and she growled on his persistence. He had never been good enough for her. Never. Everything he did for her was either wrong, or not enough, or would simply endanger her more.

But he is persistent, and determined, and he will never be deterred from his lifetime goal. So he tried for another opening. Again.

"Hevn—" at that one word, Kagami finally silently shouted his one final attempt to get back to her. To offer her hope once again.

And of course, she saw it. She knew him enough to see it. She is the only one whom he had allowed to know him enough to see what she has seen.

She stared back at him hard. And in an instant, she just fell into a blanket of sadness, pain and guilt.

"Kagami…forgive me…"

And she fell back into her state once again. And the opening he so heartedly offered was harshly slammed right to his face once again. Just like that.

It hurt a lot to see her like this all the time she's with him. Like she dreaded the time he's near, though he knew better than to think of such. That his presence only gave her a lot of sadness, though he knew it's quite unlikely. Like he is the main source of all her pain. That he had caused all her suffering.

"Hevn, no…"

"Forgive me for not being good enough as a friend…for causing you all of this…I told you to stay away but you just wouldn't…I didn't mean to hurt you…I didn't…" And finally, after such a long time, Hevn sobbed once again.

But then again, it seems that she had closed his door since she has just opened a window. And use that window to his advantage, he most certainly will.

"I missed you, Hevn. A lot. Do you even know that?"

For a few moments, and together, maybe they could both dream that nothing of this ever happened. They could go back for a few more years ago. They could dream that nothing has changed at all, that they were still in the orphanage, playing and teasing each other with insults.

He would still have amnesia and she'd remain clueless in her dreaded situation forever. He would secretly show her his inhuman tricks and she would laugh at his mistakes. They would share their dreams like any human being, as if they ever have been one. They would eat together, sleep together, and even lie in the 'dreaded room' together during the times when Kagami would be sorely punished and Hevn would insist she go with him inside that hell, too. They would both take a parenting interest in Misaki and feed and bathe him themselves like he was their cute little brother. He would act as her bodyguard if other older bullies try to molest her for simply having the beauty that she had. She would act as his nurse if ever he got wounded or hurt.

They would go back to the times when he loved to get hurt so that he could catch her attention, and she would love to get bullied so he could make use of his strength and protect her. And maybe they wouldn't have to ever go to that time when a particular stranger just came into her life and took her away from them. When he realized what he has to do and what she has to suffer.

But such is the impossibility in a dream, and the past is nothing but memories.

Hevn was the first who pulled away from those bittersweet reveries. Or attempted to, for Kagami wasn't all too willing yet to let it go.

"You did not do it to them, Hevn. Even you know that you didn't do it! It was just him all along!"

"Kagami…"

The window was slightly closed. The plea in her voice became evident once again.

Hevn could only shut her eyes so tight it pained her eyelids, enough to possibly release blood.

She sensed the upcoming storm now. The raging, possessive storm.

Red moons. Dried bloody leaves.

"Kagami, please. I don't want you to get hurt by him."

Red moons. Dried bloody leaves.

"I never cared about him Hevn!"

"How can you say that? He was our—!"

"The hell he is! He was never that, and you know it! And don't tell me that was what drove you—!"

Red moons. Dried bloody leaves.

"Kagami, please don't make this harder for us."

Red moons. Dried bloody leaves.

"Please?"

Red moons. Dried bloody leaves.

He finally let it go. With that pained expression in his face. This wasn't like Kagami at all. He was always strong, and he always held on to that icy exterior of his no matter the cost.

Seeing him like this only pained her more. She's not worth all this. Not worth his trust. His friendship. His love.

"You shant escape me, my angel…"

"I'll do whatever I can to get you out of this, Hevn. I'm stronger. We're stronger. This will finally work out, Hevn. We promised. Please tell me you'll give this a try?"

If he had said these five years ago, she would've snatched the opportunity and accepted it with as much hope and vigor that she could muster. But things have terribly happened. And she just couldn't risk it all now. She had finally decided. She's already tired of it all.

She weakly smiled, making Kagami lighten up with hope. She silently said her apologies.

"Don't worry Hevn. Nobody else will know of this. I'll make sure Ban and Ginji or any other of your new friends won't know and get hurt. This time he couldn't hurt you anymore. We wouldn't allow him to come back this time. No more deaths, Hevn. No more deaths."

How many times did he promise those? She lost count. And look at how many people have been hurt because of her hopes, because of her defiance, because she let them give her hope.

It was never their fault. All in all, it would only be her who has to be blamed by all this.

Who had tainted somebody's blood? She, even if it had been unintentional, or as what Kagami so alleged, never her fault. Who had been hunted down for years? She. Who had caused a lot of deaths because she only cared? She. Who had been the daughter of the cause? She.

To be able to kill a plant, strike right down to the roots.

It just so happened that the roots were hers.

And it will only take a few months more.

At most, two months.

And it will finally end.

'Forgive me, Kagami…but I can't…I just can't anymore…'

She weakly smiled at him again. Whatever he thinks about that, whether it was an act of approval or otherwise, she could easily guess. Especially after seeing the slight glimmer dancing in his cold eyes.

Deception. She did not know which hurts more, to die because of it or to die with it.

Guess she'll soon realize any time now.

'Forgive me, Kagami…but I can't…I just can't anymore…'

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

He was simply staring at the plum hues of his cast fire, glowing with a bloody luster. Though these kinds of fire rarely happen or exist, it suited him just fine. Especially as the hues dramatically swayed and gradually evolved into a color so sweet and divine, his lust to quench all of it only grew in each and every step.

Oh, yes, finally. Amber. How much has he lusted and longed for amber.

This kind of fire could rarely even be called a fire at all. The warmth it generated closely matches a slightly fused light bulb.

Oh, yeah. Cold fire. Cold, cold fire.

He lazily smiled his menacing grin once again.

How easy was it to get what you want, when you suffuse it with fear.

Fear with its worths, of course.

Especially fear with deaths involved.

It's really quite easy to manipulate feelings, especially guilt and fear.

The irony of it all. Her amber-eyed angel had the gall to be terrified with him when it has been written that forever will they be together.

She is only his for the taking. And it only happened that he is such a selfish man when his possessions are concerned. He had simply made himself understood.

'You can never escape me anymore, Hevn…never…'

He laughed harder inwardly. Stupid SAKURA. Did they possibly think that they could cheapen his non-existence with just one box? Did they possibly think that she will not also die if they do any injustice to him?

He is Shuukra after all. The deranged none.

The outcast.

The accursed.

And Hevn's other half that would make them finally whole.

He longed for the time when he could finally stave off his hunger for her blood as he greedily dig his talons near her heart, all the while sucking all those sweet red pools of liquid within her, as he finally get hold and grab at the thing she so selfishly kept within her when in fact they supposedly have to share it together.

Oh, yes. Share it together, indeed.

And since half of their life it was in her, it would just be about time that they settle the score. By literally giving the ball on his court.

And when that time comes, nothing can stop him to slake on his revenge on SAKURA and Babylon City.

He will make hell take vengeance on them. He promised.

Guess what. It has just started.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The door had finally slammed its way wide open.

And after that, the eerie silence.

She didn't give a damn. As far as she was concerned, she had already prepared herself to act. Hevn finally stood up so rigidly as if ready to fight.

She expected their steps to be that fast-paced…well…maybe a little slower. She expected the eerie silence again. The barely controlled breaths.

She expected her reaction, too, by bracing herself and, well, yes, deceive them once again.

But the very thing she never expected—which is actually receiving a very warm and tight hug given by Ban from behind—happened. And they only have to shock her more when it was followed with a very fond tap-massage from Ginji.

She didn't know which looked more stunned, she who has her tongue tied and eyes wide, or Kagami who looked like death had him ashen in stance.

And she couldn't control but feel very guilty once again. She could just imagine what Takatori has done to these retrievers to be able to receive such affection. She just didn't know how he could always twist things, but somehow, that has always been his forte.

"Forgive us, Hevn-san, forgive us…"

Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.

No more. No more. No more. Please.

"Let's get out of this hellhole Hevn and forget we've ever been here. We'll make it up to you…promise, promise."

It sounded more like an angry growl. A very humiliated growl.

She wasn't sure what his message was, whether he was guilty of his previous accusations, or worse, whether he was told of the whole truth by the self-deciding Takatori.

She just fervently wished for the former. For the deception.

'I'm sorry, Ban, Ginji…'

Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.

No more. No more. No more. Please.

Now. It would have to be now.

Kagami was simply observing, a private smile in his lips.

He knew.

And he just hopes that all's well that ends well.

Even if he had to sacrifice in the end.