Chapter Twelve

The drive home from Carmel Ridge can take anywhere from an hour and a half to three hours, depending on the traffic. Bobby puts a CD of assorted artists into the player and lights a cigarette.

This is the last cigarette……….Well maybe the last pack.

It was a great visit with his Mom. He takes a quick look up in the air. "Thanks."

His mood has improved since this morning and as he approaches the interstate, the words from the doctor go through his mind.

To proud to admit to yourself that, you needed help. In addition, I bet that if you think back over the past few weeks how many people have actually been there to help you, and if they gave you an opening to talk you shut down or changed the subject or you pushed them away, isn't that right?

"Wow." He says aloud. "What an idiot."

He thinks of all the people that were there to help him. Even Logan and Barek for helping to find him and the support that they gave Alex.

Captain Deakins for giving him a long leash. Bobby knew that the Captain was aware that morning that he was drinking. You don't become Captain of the MCS by being impervious.

ADA Ron Carver for letting it slide that morning, showing up at the hearing in that condition.

Even people that he has never meet before. Sheriff Coles down in Maryland.

Any of those three people could have nailed his ass to the wall.

Alex. Oh, man I don't think I could ever thank her enough.

During the drive, he only hits one half hour traffic jam and as he drives over the bridge, he makes a decision. He needs to see Nicole and tomorrow is as good as any to go. It might be a total disaster but it is something that he has to do.

Before he goes home her stops off at Wendy's for something to eat. He arrives home a little after six PM. The answering machine is blinking, three messages.

He eats before listening to the messages. As he is about to hit the "Play Messages" button his doorbell rings.

He opens the door and standing there are two very pissed off guys.

He says. "Hey." The taller of the men speaks first. "Hey, is that all you can say, where the fuck have you been?"

"Around."

Andy Reilly and Dave Fanelli just walk past him as he stands there holding the door.

He shuts the door. As he walks toward them Andy says, "Jesus Christ you could of at least returned a phone call."

"Well Andy at least we know he's alive."

"Just barely, he looks like shit."

"I'm standing right here."

"Yeah we know."

"You guys are a pain in the ass."

"Are you alright?"

"Getting there."

"I think he needs a night out."

"Definatley."

Bobby shakes his head. "No drinking."

"Well we were thinking more like." Dave holds up three tickets. "The Yankees are in town."

"I'm there, I gotta change my shirt, be right back."

"Andy you think he's bull shitting us."

"No." Shaking his head, he's "He's not making excuses for not going. He's coming around. He'll be alright."

The Next Morning

He wakes a little after 8 am from a restful nights sleep. He takes a quick shower and then a walk to the deli. One coffee for the walk home and one coffee to drink with the breakfast sandwich he bought. He sits on the outside deck and opens the paper. The phone rings.

"Hello."

A very angry Alex is on the line. "What did you get drunk again last night?"

He does not respond quickly enough. "Well? Is that why you forgot to call me?"

"No." He says very shyly.

"I'm sorry Bobby I have no right to speak to you that way."

"Yes you do."

"Ok then. Where the hell were you last night?"

He laughs. "Andy, Dave and I went to the Yankee game last night. It wasn't planned they just stopped by. I didn't get home until after midnight and I figured it would be too late to call."

She smiles. "I hope you had a good time?"

"Yeah as a matter of fact I did."

He can hear voices in the background. "Bobby I can't talk long. I'm helping Logan and Barek on their case and we're heading down to the lab. So what time tonight?"

I thought she forgot.

"Seven. Is seven alright?"

"Sounds great, I'll see you then. Bye."

"Ok bye."

He clicks off the phone and a smile crosses his face.

He leisurely drinks his coffee and finishes reading the paper.

Visit With Nicole

Within an hour, he is in his car on his way to the jail to see Nicole.

Nicole is lying on her bed reading a book. She hears someone walking toward her cell but she ignores the noise and continues to read.

"Hey, you have a visitor," says a guard.

"Is it my lawyer?"

"No but it's a cop, come on lets go, you know the routine."

She stands up and turns her back to the cell door. Nicole is hand cuffed. The guard escorts her to a private visiting room. The door opens and she is pleasantly surprise. "Sit down." Says the guard as she removes the handcuffs.

"Good morning, Bobby."

He turns to look at her. "That's debatable."

He sits across from her as she is smiling at him.

"You look good in orange."

She continues to smile as she sits back in her chair.

"Are you allowed to be here?"

"Why not? I didn't arrest you."

"That's right maybe the charges will actually stick this time."

He chuckles softy. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No, you don't have to leave."

"I've come here to tell you a few things then I'm gone and I am going to do my damnedest to forget that you ever existed."

"You could never forget me detective, if you still are a detective."

"What?"

She moves forward to catch his eye. "Have you lost you job yet Bobby?"

He lowers his head and shakes it as he sighs. As always, she knows exactly what buttons to push and being in jail has not slowed her down.

"Why would you ask that?"

"It's the middle of the morning in the middle of the week and you're dressed like you're slumming."

"I've just taken a few days off, that's all."

"Did they tell you, you had to? Well your mother will be glad to see you more than once a week."

"Yes I'm sure she would."

He laughs and gets up from the chair. "You can't help yourself can you, I mean look where you are. You are not in control of anything here. No it was my idea."

"Oh I see."

Raising his voice, "No you don't! Goddamnit, just stop it, no more fucking games Nicole!" His anger is showing, something she has rarely seen. She stiffens up.

He puts his hands on his waist as he tries to control his temper, he paces around the room, and Nicole stays quiet. She watches him closely. He calms down and resumes his seat. "Why? Please, can you please tell me why?"

"Because I could."

He bows his head down. "Can't you just talk to me? Jesus Christ, just talk to me."

"How has the past few weeks been?" He does not answer her right away. "Oh I see that badly."

He nods his head. "Yes they were pretty bad but things seem to be getting a little bit better especially in the last few days." He stands up and begins to walk around the room. "You see I realized something, something I never thought I had."

"What?"

"You'd never understand. It has to do with people." Her demeanor changes and she stops smiling and looks away.

"What? What's the matter, you look different." She does understand. He is not like her, not at all. He is not alone. There will always be someone there for him.

I should have known that she would not let him fall.

He bends down to catch her eye and she raises her head. "It may take some time Nicole but eventually the memory of you will be just a blur, I feel a big change coming in my life, but you."

He straightens up. "This is it, this is where you will be for a long, long time." He begins to walk away. "Goodbye Nicole."

Barely above a whisper, that he does not hear. "You've finally beaten me Bobby, congratulations."

The door slams and he is gone.

Later That Day

He takes a shower and not really wanting to, he shaves. Every time he takes days off from work he lets his beard grow. Splashes on some cologne, he does not wear any when he works it screws up his sense of smell.

He opens his closet door and stands there just looking. "This is ridiculous. I've seen this woman almost everyday for over five years now. Like she gives a crap what I wear. What am I so nervous about? It's only Alex."

He decides on black jeans and a blue sports shirt.

Across the bridge, Alex is doing the same thing.

"This is ridiculous. I've seen this man almost everyday for over five years now. A skirt, no he'll probably laugh, he hasn't seen me in a skirt in years. Jesus, get a hold of yourself, its just Bobby. She decides on black pants and a turquoise blouse.

She gets in the car at 6:15. Over the bridge and within half an hour she is in his neighborhood.

He answers the door.

Damn she looks great.

Does he always look and smell this good.

"Bobby are you ready?"

"Yeah. Do you mind walking?"

The air is clear and the temperature is in the high seventies.

"No, not at all, it's a beautiful night. Let's go,"

The dinner conversation consisted of everything but police work. It was a first for the both of them.

"I think I ate too much."

"Yeah. Me too."

There is a slight chill in the air as they walk home, Alex shivers. He puts his arm around her and holds her close to him. They do not speak much on the way home but it's not uncomfortable.

The walk home takes no more than ten minutes. He unlocks the door and he holds the door for her as she enters.

He grabs one of his many remotes and music fills the room. She walks into the living room and sits down on the couch.

As he is in the kitchen, she gets up and walks over to the stereo. As she walks she flings her shoes off and they end up in two different locations. She looks through his CD collection. She sees CDS from Sinatra, the Eagles, Chicago, Eric Clapton and many, many more, a wide variety of styles.

He walks up behind her and as she turns, he hands her a glass of wine without her asking.

Thanks." She takes a sip. "Wow this is delicious. Why does your wine always taste so good? Is it expensive?"

"No more expensive than that 4o dollar bottle of whiskey you made me throw out."

She takes another sip. "Yeah well you and whiskey equals nasty."

"So I've been told."

"I like your CD collection." She continues to look. "Bobby? They're in alphabetical order."

"Yeah I know. I have over 200 CD'S in these racks, how else am I supposed to find what I'm looking for."

"That's make sense."

Holding his wine glass in one hand, he places his arm around her. She is a little startled at first but then she moves back into him.

She can feel his breathe on her neck.

"Do you smell this good or is it me?"

She smiles. "It's you."

"Hmmmm, nice." They both laugh.

He moves her hair away as he kisses her shoulder. She can feel his tongue move up to her neck as his free hand is cupping her breast moving his thumb across her nipple.

He reaches around her, takes the glass from her hand, and places them on the table. Alex does not move, he might be a big man but he is very light on his feet and she can feel him behind her once again.

His arms find their way around her waist as he tenderly nibbles on her earlobe. With each nibble, his hands are exploring her body. His mouth is once again sucking on her neck and shoulder as his hands are caressing her breasts.

Alex raises her arms to put around his neck. He takes hold of her hand and spins her around. They are face to face. Before she can react, his hands are on her butt and he picks her up. They kiss each other deeply, their tongues darting in and out.

He moves back a few steps and then sits down on the couch with her in his lap.

"Nice move."

He smiles. "If I kept bending down like that I was going to get a crick in my neck. You're a lot shorter without your shoes on. Oh by the way one is over there." He points. "And one is over there."

She doesn't say the words but he can see it in her face.

Shut up Bobby. He laughs.

He cups her face in his hands as he kisses her gently on the lips. "I'm in love with you Alex."

She puts her arms around his neck. "I love you too."

She pulls him close and kisses him as he unbuttons her blouse. He pulls it down off her shoulders and it falls to the floor. Alex sits up, unclasps her bra, and tosses it across the room. He watches it as it lands on the table.

He leans his head forward and kisses her between her breasts. "God you're beautiful."

She straightens up as he cups each breast in his hands licking each nipple to get them wet. His hand is fondling one as he takes the other one into his mouth gently biting on her erect nipple. She arches her back and lets out a soft moan.

She pushes him back on the couch and unbuttons his shirt. Her hands caress his chest and he moves further back in the couch. As she licks her own fingers, she puts her fingers next to his mouth and he grabs them with his teeth and sucks on them. She rubs his nipple with one finger as she rubs her own with the other. He shivers and takes a deep breath.

She moves her head down, kisses his neck, and licks her way down to his chest.

She can feel his hardness underneath her and she wonders if he can feel her wetness as his hand has found its place between her legs.

Suddenly his hands are on her butt as he lifts her up off his legs, he then opens his legs and she is standing in-between. He stands up, takes her by the hand, and leads her to his bedroom.

Alex stands with her back to the bed as she grabs him by the belt and pulls him toward her. She takes off his shirt and tosses it over her head. She unbuckles his belt and slides it through the loops as she kisses his chest then flicks her tongue across his nipples. She tosses his belt over her head.

"How do you ever find your clothes in the morning?"

She laughs as she says. "Wait till you see what I do to your underwear."

He shakes his head and laughs.

She unzips his pants and places her hands on his hips as she slides them off. He steps out of them as she pulls down his boxers.

"It was getting a little tight in there."

"I can see that." A wicked smile, that he does not see, crosses her face. She remembers a conversation she had with Carolyn.

She sits down on the bed and begins to stroke him. She leans forward to take him in her mouth. Her hands are on his butt holding him in place as her tongue swirls around him, slowly moving him in and out of her mouth. He lets out a low moan as he runs his fingers through her hair and caresses her back.

He is almost at the edge when he pulls away from her. "No not that way, not this time."

He gently pushes her down on the bed as he slowly removes her pants and then her panties. He holds them in his hands. "Go ahead do it." He tosses each item over his head and she laughs. As Alex moves back on the bed, he places his hand on her calf as he climbs onto the bed. He slowly moves his hand up her leg resting it on her thigh as he lies down on the bed holding his head up with his arm.

As he looks down at her, he can read her mind. He shakes his head. "Not yet."

His hand is fondling her breast and then he pinches her nipple sending a shiver through her.

She smiles and pulls him close to her. She glides her tongue across his bottom lip. His tongue dives into her mouth as his hand has found its way to her thigh and runs his fingers lightly across her center. He places two fingers inside her as his mouth has begun to suck on her neck. She arches her back and lets out a soft moan.

He lays kisses from her neck to her shoulder and collarbone. He slides his fingers out as his tongue has found its way to her breasts. His wet finger rubs one of her nipples as his tongue is licking the other one.

He slowly and gently positions himself on top of her. He is a big man but his touch is gentle and sensual. Every touch is driving her crazy with anticipation. He kisses her between her breasts as she runs her fingers through his hair. His tongue kisses and licks down her body.

He spreads her legs apart as he lies down between them. She grabs his hands and places them on her breasts. He touches her clit with the tip of his tongue and she trembles, she arches her back as his tongue slides into her.

He kisses and licks his way back up her body tasting every inch of her. His mouth is close to hers again and as she looks up at him, she smiles. She puts her hands on his face and kisses him. His face is so sweet and his eyes are so full of passion. "Bobby make love to me."

His mouth is on hers again as he slowly enters her. She tightens at first and then relaxes moving with him taking him in inch by inch.

She grabs hold of the sheets and pulls up on them as her body sinks into the bed.

"Come on baby, come for me."

She wraps her legs around him, not wanting this to end.

He can feel her shudder underneath him as she climaxes. A long wail of indistinct words fill the air as her orgasm claims her body.

She releases the sheets and puts her arms around him. He covers her mouth with his as he pounds into her faster and harder. He straightens up as he reaches the edge. A growl comes from him as he climaxes, he thrusts in once more empting himself within her.

He lays his head down next to hers as his breathing starts to slow down.

He pulls out and lies down next to her. She reaches over and puts her arm on his chest as her head is lying on his shoulder. He grabs her hands and kisses the top of her head.

"Holy Shit." He says between breaths.

"I couldn't have said it any better myself."

They lay in silence for a few minutes.

Alex says. "What do we do now?"

"I could go for a pizza."

"Be serious."

"I am. I'm hungry."

"Bobby."

"Don't worry about it now."

As she sits up against the backboard, he puts his hands behind his head.

As she speaks her, fingers are playing with his hair, "I've had a lot of lovers in my life but you are probably one of the best friends I have ever had. I don't want to lose that."

"How many?"

She shakes her head at the question. "How many what?"

"Lovers, 10,20, how many."

"Jesus Bobby, you're impossible

"No I'm very possible, come here."

He pulls her down and kisses her. She snuggles in next to him.

"Bobby?"

"Shh, not now."

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize, I just can't do serious right now. Ok."

"Ok."

She kisses his cheek as she gets out of the bed. Alex sees his shirt that she threw over her head and picks it up. She closes her eyes as her nose gets a whiff of his scent. She puts it on. It practically covers her entire body but she looks so cute and comfortable. He smiles at the sight. She begins to walk toward the door.

"Alex. What are you doing?"

"I'm not going to eat pizza naked it could be very dangerous."

"You defiantly have a point there."

"Is Rocco's on your speed dial?"

"No. The number is 555-1742."

"Do you want any toppings?"

He looks at the clock. "No, not at this hour, plain is fine."

TBC