poor = i don't own Twilight!

sorry this took so long but it wasn't flowing the way i wanted and i didn't want to post something really bad so i took more time to make it good...Enjoy!

This Chapter is dedicated to my very good friend ecaniaga. she has been there to listen to me ramble about my unimportant life problems and has been a great friend though it all...

EPOV

I was really nervous about us hanging out after school. I think she was scared of this Lonnie guy. I can't ever find this guy because I would slowly rip him to shreads. I want to make him suffer.

I am really glad she's with me though and that I made plans to spend after school with her. I know I would be trying to find that pig. We need to keep someone watching Bella at all times. I need to know that she's ok. She has to be. We really need to figure out what is happening with Lauren's dad. I need Carlisle to make sure she's going to be okay. I just pulled into her driveway. I need to push this out of my head, because I don't want her to worry about nothing.

She got the key under the eaves and unlocked the door, and lead us in. Her living room and kitchen were small. I guess it's only the two of them living here so, It's not so bad. She got a glass of water for herself and walked in the living room and sat on the couch, and patted the seat beside her for me to join her. I walked over and settled myself in the couch.

"I'm going to go first before I loose my nerve. I like you. A lot. I've spend a lot of time thinking it over and I'm glad you did what you did. When you told Mike that, I wasn't sure what to feel. I wasn't sure if you were just saying that to get Mike to leave me alone or if you meant it. I still don't, but I guess that's why you're here today. I want to be with you." she concluded.

She liked me? The same way I liked her? How could she like me? I know she knows that I am not human. Why would she want to be with someone who isn't like her? I realized that she needs to know what my family and me are before she makes any real decisions. She deserves to know what she's getting herself into.

"I think you should know what I am before you decide anything. I don't want you to regret your decision when you found out later. I don't want you to waste your time with someone that could scare you." I told her.

"Okay. But I'll warn you I don't care what you are." she warned. Well, I think she ment for it to be a warning.

"You might change your mind about that." I said and then sighed. "We are vampires." I said simpily.

I heard her gasp. I couldn't look at her. Her heart rate accelerated, and her breath came in short, shallow breaths. She was afraid. I shouldn't have said anything! Why did I have to be so stupid?!

"I'm sorry. I'll go." I stood to leave but a small, warm hand grabbed my wrist. I looked at her for the first time and she didn't look afraid.

"You're not afriad." I said. I could see she wasn't.

"No." she answered quickly, honestly

"Why? You should be. I'm a monster." I told her in a frustrated tone.

I thought being around her would make this easier but it just keeps getting worse. I don't understand this girl's reasoning. How could she not be afraid of me? She's seen how strong and fast we are, yet here she sits. She's not even three feet away from me. Why?

"You're not a monster. None of you are. If you were, then I would probably be dead right now. I know I was a risk to keep alive because I could have exposed you for what you are. Though, I didn't know what you were until now, I could have told the cops in my statement about the crash. That proves not you or your family are monsters." she ranted. She seemed deeply offended that I thought of myself in this manner. Though, it's true. I am a monster. She just doesn't know it yet.

"Oh, but, I am. Bella, you know nothing of the things that I have done. I have done some truely heinous things. I would be spending 260 years in prison for the things I have done. This is just a minimum, of course." she had to understand that I am a horrible monster. I fight every second not to kill her. Kill her!

"Do you regret it?" she asks. I didn't expect her to ask me this. I expected her to scream at me to get out of her house.

"Yes. But it doesn't change anything." I answered her honestly.

"If you could take it back, would you?" she asked again.

What is with this girl. I tell her that I should be in prison and she's so calm. Does she have any survival intincts?

"Yes. But that doesn't bring those people back." I said sadly, and looked down.

I felt a small warm hand on my face. She touched me gently, like she didn't want to hurt me or something. Like she could really hurt me. Then, I realized, she could. She could hurt me worse than anyone else on the planet could. If someone broke my arm it would heal. If she ran from me, then I knew my heart and soul would break.

That is what she has become. My soul. If she were to shut me out tonight, then my soul would be shattered. I would simpily exist. I would never live again. My second chance at life would not be worth living. It would be wasted. This realized scared me. I, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, am deeply, and soulfully in love with Isabella Swan.

"If wanted to change what you have done and you regret in, then you are not a monster. It means your soul broke a little bit when, whatever was the final straw, happened. You realized that what you were doing was wrong and you had to stop. Stop before you ruin or change anyone else's lives." she told me in an intense, honest voice while looking deep into my eyes. I think she saw my soul.

I realized she was right. When I saw that beautiful, little girl run to her daddy. Little did she know that her daddy just raped some teenage girl until she was raw. I later found out that there was so much damage that she could never have children, because of her daddy. There was a big crack in my soul that I didn't know was there. Maybe now that I can see this crack, she can help me fix it.

I leaned into her hand and I saw her start to situate herself closer to me. I really looked into her eyes for the first time and saw determination in her eyes. I realized what she decided to do. She slowly started to lean forward, as if to caution me.

Could I handle this? The blood under the thin layer of skin, that is her lips so close to mine? Will I hurt her? No! I can't hurt her! I hurt or kill her, I will surely die.

I brought my hand up and rested it on her cheek. The skin heated up instantly. I liked the feeling that just by touching her, I could make her blush. I closed the gap between us.

The instant our lips connected, everything started to tingle. From my lips to my arms to my feet. I have never felt so alive. So whole. Complete. I felt as though, me loving her would be possibale. She must have felt it too, because she pressed her lips harder to me. As soon as she did that, her heart hate picked up and raced though her veins.

'Just a taste...' the monster in me thought. He was about to combust.

No!

I jumped back away from her. Almost as far as the room would let me.

"I'm sorry..." she whispered, so low a human wouldn't have heard it. She sounded hurt.

"No, I'm sorry. You didn't do anything. Just give me a minute." I vaguely explained.

She nodded. I waited until her heart rate was slow and even. Then, I walked back over to the couch.

"I'm sorry. Your heart rate picked up and I could feel the blood flowing faster though your veins. The monster in me almost took over for a second." I explained as calmly as I could. I didn't want to upset her again.

She nodded and then looked up at me. In her eyes, I saw hope. I had to ask her again.

"Are you sure you're ok?" she asked before I had a chance to ask her.

"Not really but, I will be after tonight. I will need to go hunting tonight after that one." I told her, though, instantly regreted it. She looked terrified. Then I realized that I didn't explain my diet yet.

"When I mean hunting, I mean, animals. My family and I have vowed not to harm humans." she relaxed a little bit. "It's not quite the same, but it helps. It should be easier to be around you tomorrow. I should have went hunning last night. I knew I was coming here. What was I thinking?" I finished and wonder out loud.

"So, is that why your eyes are gold? Because you all hunt animals and not humans?" she asked.

"Yes. That's exactly why." I praised her inteligence.

She smiled. Though, I have no idea why. I mean, she just kissed a vampire. A cold, lifeless, piece of staone.

"Okay."

"Do you still want to be with me?" I asked her.

"Of course. I told you I don't care what you are." she answered with a smile.

I smiled back. I couldn't help it. I've never been happier in my existence. I can't wait to come back tonight. I am going to keep guard over her eveynight. I don't think I should tell her this, though. She might think I'm some kind of stalker. If I tell her about what almost what hapened last night, then I'll worry her about nothing. Her heart rate increased a little bit.

Oh crap! I forgot to call Emmett! We need to set up our plan for tonight and who's going where. I will call Esme to keep watch over her while I"m gone. She shouldn't be involed with all the Lauren stuff. I got out my phone and sent a quick text to Esme, I'm not sure if Bella even saw it. I hope she didn't. That would have been rude.

"Bella, I need to go. Alice wanted to talk to me about a few things before school tomorrow. I will pick you up again, if that's okay, of course." I told her reluctantly.

"Okay. And that's just fine about picking me up. Do you mind if I asked you questions about what you are?" she asked nervously.

I arched an eyebrow at her.

"I am curious about what is truth and what is a lie." she defended.

"That's okay, I guess. We just have to make sure we are out of hearing range." I told her. She smiled.

I decided that I need to kiss her again, before I go. Plus that could burn some time before Esme gets here. I want her here before I leave.

I walked up to her and her breath hitched.

"Breathe, Bella" I reminded her.

She took a shaky breath. I lowered my head to hers. I needed to get used to the feeling of her blood being so close to me. To my mouth. I connected my lips with hers and she fit perfectly to me. Exactly like she was made to fit my figure.

This time it was easier. I think I rushed it a little the first time. If I do this at my own rate maybe I will be able to get better at this.

The feeling of her warm, full lips on mine was indescribable. Her lips molded themselves to mine, as mine did to hers. I could stand here and kiss her for hours. If she didn't need to breathe like me, then I would be kissing her longer.

'I'm here, Edward.' Esme informed me.

I broke our kiss, and touched my forehead to hers.

"Goodbye until tomorrow, love." I told her. I give her a sweet goodbye peck and left her house.

'That was really sweet, Edward. You should bring her by the house soon so we can offically meet.' Esme thought. She was so happy for me. Honestly, I was happy for me too.

ok there's chapter 12! sorry about that it took forever to get out. I knew what I wanted to happen it just wasn't flowing well...if i would have posted earlier then it would have been shorter and more choppy like...

please read and review! i love reviews!