Chapter 12: Mentor's Grief
The Hunger Games was here once again…and the Reaping was upon District 9, it felt like only yesterday Sinder and I were up on the hill…having that conversation that I had played over and over again in my head a hundred times.
I stood in the Justice Building, waiting for the arrival of Felix and the others so we could begin the Reaping; he was expected to arrive any moment now. I was dressed in a formal suit that was a deep cream/beige colour and had some crimson red patterns on it. It complimented my hair perfectly.
My oldest brother, now 19 and exempt from the games, was with me but he would have to leave the moment the others arrived 'you nervous' he asked.
I gave him a look that made it clear I was positively terrified 'I'm about to mentor two kids, probably send them to their deaths…how would you feel?'
'I see your point…I wouldn't lead with that speech though if I were you' he said clearly trying to be helpful.
'It's the truth, they may as well hear it' I replied, clearing my throat nervously.
My brother gave me a concerned look, clearly worried about the toll the games had taken on me.
Just then Felix and the mayor burst in 'right let's get this started shall we. Willow my dear lovely to see you again; gentlemen please escort her brother out now will you.'
Giving me one last look my brother allowed himself to be guided out by the peacekeepers.
The three of us moved out onto the stage, I took my seat alongside the mayor and Felix stood up front by the microphone and began his usual speech.
I tried not to turn my nose up at the crowd and look stuck up…but it was hard being raised on a stage and everything; I lowered my head, looking down at them, trying to keep a straight and emotionless face…ever since the games I didn't like to show my feelings that much…when I did I had a tendency to break down.
When Felix was done and the usual anthem was played we moved to select the tributes.
'Ladies first' Felix said smiling shuffling his hand in the right bowl and pulling out a small piece of paper 'Fay Burkwood.'
The feeling of shock that went through me caused me to gasp before I could hold it back, fortunately for me the crowd had also made a fair bit of noise at the name and so it was drowned out.
Everyone turned to look at Fay, who I could see now, she was shocked and a look of pale horror had crossed her face.
This had to be a mistake…it had to be I thought to myself the odds of two siblings getting picked in consecutive years…
Felix looked over at me, clearly expecting a reaction and gave a slight shake of his head 'up you come my dear' he said turning his head back to Fay.
Fay stepped up onto the stage and stood a few steps from me, she looked over at me, the shock clearly hadn't worn off yet for her to express anything to me.
Taking out a piece of paper from the boy's bowl Felix replied 'Sam Benton.'
The boy that a few people looked to had dark brown hair that was cut fairly short, he looked about 16 or so.
Once the two tributes were inside the Justice Building I pulled Felix aside 'there must be a mistake, no way in hell two siblings get called in consecutive years, it just doesn't happen, especially when Fay's name is only in there like…3 times or so.'
'It doesn't matter, rules are rules, unless of course someone volunteers for her but no one did' Felix replied, after a brief pause he replied 'I am sorry, really I am.'
The train roared through the countryside and I sat thinking what to do in my private quarters…Felix was no doubt speaking with the two of them now in the dining car.
Sighing I stood up straight, breathed a big sigh, left my room, headed down the hallway and into the dining car.
'Ah Willow my dear, there you are, we were just wondering where you got to' Felix said in his overly cheerful voice.
'Give me a few minutes with them will you' I said to him, moving to stand by the chair he was occupying.
'Of course, they're all yours, you are the mentor now after all' he replied and headed off into another car.
I looked at the two kids; Fay seemed so small in the large luxury chair opposite me, not at all like her usual confidant self that swelled with maturity. The boy, Sam, sat quietly, looking around at everything, clearly fascinated.
'Ok I'm going to get right to the point and ask you both some simple questions' I said to them firmly, not giving them a chance to reply I began by asking 'do you know each other at all?'
They looked at each other and then shook their heads 'well, I mean I've seen her around…and we all know about her knocking your lights out last year' Sam replied with a smile.
I glowered at him and he shut up.
Sitting back in the chair I continued 'Fay I know you and me have…history, but from here on out I'm your mentor, you will do what I say if you want to survive ok, you too Sam.'
They both nodded 'I'm not going to lie to you, you may not survive…you may die…the odds are NOT in your favour…all you can do is play to your strengths, do the best you can…and prey that luck is on your side…because luck is the only reason I won…luck and a moment of blind rage.'
There was a long silence following my speech and then I stood up 'we'll talk more later, you two should rest up.'
As I stood in my room I heard a knock at the door and I opened it to find Fay standing there 'is all that really true…what you said…do you really believe all that?'
'Of course' I said, standing aside to let her in 'there isn't a day that goes by I don't think…or dream about what happened in that arena.'
Fay was quiet, far more quiet than I was used to around her 'I can't believe I got picked.'
'I know…the feeling is horrible isn't it' I replied.
She nodded 'it's like…I had a flash forward vision of seeing myself doing everything the other tributes do…the interviews…the arena.'
'That's just the parts you see' I told her 'when we get to the Capitol…you'll realise just how much work goes into all this…so much work simply to see people die.'
It was like watching a re-run of my own events…only now I was Serilda…and I was with them from the train…from slightly earlier on.
I watched Fay's eyes light up with amazement as she saw the Capitol for the first time in her life, that look of awe on her face as we approached it by train.
I watched her and Sam be cheered by the endless crowd as they left the train and then I watched her leave to be cleaned up by Katrina's team.
I hardly recognized her when she reappeared for dinner later, she looked amazing, her reddish brown hair all neat and tied back in a simple yet elegant ponytail, she was dressed in silk navy blue top with silk black pants.
'How do you feel' I asked her curiously as she sat down to eat.
'Like I've just been plucked and scrubbed clean like a chicken' she muttered, rubbing her skin as if she was slightly uncomfortable.
I remembered that odd feeling all too well, the feeling of being "too clean", and the slightest bacteria might cause you to get sick because you are so sensitive now.
Everyday got worse, the Opening Ceremony passed, the training began and I did my utmost to teach them all I thought they'd need.
On Day 2 of training I began to get frustrated, though it was partially myself I was angry at to be fair, 'no' I yelled again for the third time as me and Fay trained privately, away from Sam 'you don't get it, haven't you been listening to a single thing the trainers have said?'
Fay scowled at me 'yes I heard them, but there is only so much traps and survival crap I can do, I need to learn how to use a weapon.'
'No one can learn a weapon in a few days' I argued angrily 'if you know how to use something then good, we'll try that but if not…there is never enough survival, I learned that the hard way.'
'What if I use sickles like you did' Fay suggested 'I mean it is a natural choice for our district.'
'Depends' I muttered 'can you use them?'
Fay picked up a pair from the table of smaller weapon options and tried them out a bit 'not bad' I replied after watching her for a few minutes, 'keep practising.'
I left her to practise and went to see how Sam was doing.
It was on the final night, after the interviews were done, that I was standing up on the rooftop of our building. I remembered how me and Sinder had stood up here too…how he had wished he could have jumped…sometimes I wish we could have too.
'Here you are' came Fay's voice from behind me, I turned to see her standing near the door.
'You need to get some rest, you have a big day tomorrow' I replied simply 'we all do' I added quietly.
'It could be my last' Fay replied simply 'how am I supposed to sleep knowing that.'
'It won't be' I said angrily, my teeth partially gritted 'you can win…you have to.'
Turning and walking over to her I crouched down to her level 'listen to me, I know you and I haven't got along since…Sinder died…but you are one of the bravest and most feisty girls I know in our whole district…you are twice the fighter I ever was…you stood up to peace keepers once remember.'
She gave me an awkward smirk 'yeah…this is different though.'
'No it isn't; you've trained, you've done all you can to get support…and I will do my utmost to help with sponsors' I replied 'you can win.'
That was when she uttered the words I never thought she'd ever say and I would never forget them, not as long as I'd ever live 'I'm scared.'
I pulled her close to me and held her tight 'I know, it's ok…but you have to be strong…just remember your training.'
I felt her nod 'I'm so sorry for the things I said…I want you to know that now.'
I nodded my head, accepting her apology.
I watched the screen as my two tributes stood on their pads, surrounded by a hot jungle like terrain, the clearing in front of them had the Cornucopia, clearly in sight between the few random trees that sprouted up in the clearing.
The countdown ended and I watched them run, preying they survived what was always the worst part…the bloodbath. At first everything was a mess of flying figures, I couldn't tell them apart…then it finally settled down…Sam was dead.
I couldn't breakdown…not yet, closing my eyes and breathing deep long sighs I continued to watch…I needed to know where Fay was, that she was alright…there, one of the cameras finally caught her, she was headed to the west side of the arena…towards a water source…good.
On Day 4 of the games I was interviewed about my tributes; one dead and one still alive. Very little had happened with Fay so far, on Day 2 she had jumped one of the tributes from District 4 and killed him. I wasn't sure what scared me more, the look of fury on her face as she did it or the look of horror on her face afterwards when she realised what she'd done. She had taken a knife the boy had carried and his supplies but hurled his trident into the foliage, having no use for it.
On the third day she had climbed up into the trees after gathering food and taken to sleeping there, I was impressed how well she knew how to climb.
All I wanted was to get back to helping her and monitoring her events but I first had to go through the interview with Caesar.
'So' Caesar said 'Sam sadly didn't do so well…but Fay is looking promising wouldn't you say Willow, do you think District 9 could win again?'
I was silent for a moment 'anything is possible at this point; I'm doing my utmost to ensure she survives.'
Caesar smiled 'I'm sure you are, the last report I got says that we are down to…8 tributes in the arena, is that right?'
I nodded, the Careers had been highly vicious this year and one or two others weren't bad either.
'Well I guess we'll see' Caesar replied in his excited voice.
Day 5…that was when it happened…I don't even know what happened exactly…one minute she was there…and the next…she had fallen dead. The last thing I saw was her eyes looking up into the camera; did she know they were there somehow?
People who knew who I was, turned from the monitor to look at me, I was still frozen, staring at the body on the screen, after a long moment I said 'change the screen' in a cold, angry mutter.
'We can't until they pick her up' explained one of the men at the controls.
I couldn't handle seeing it any longer, I turned and left, storming out of the room, I didn't care how childish it looked, I didn't stop moving until I was all the way back upstairs in my private quarters. Once there I grabbed everything I could reach and threw it, ripped it, smashed it, punched the wall and the hit the glass until it cracked.
Tears flowed from my eyes and I collapsed onto the floor, letting my body fall limp against the side of the bed.
