After dinner was finished, we stayed there in the kitchen and enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere. Mathias did most of the talking; I could never comprehend how one person could do the amount of talking for three people. And I was content with just sitting there, listening to Mathias' never ending stories of his various exploits, watching Emil resting his head on the table and idly playing with his puffin and then ultimately falling asleep.

I wouldn't have minded it, when my life had continued like this. It was nice and peaceful, I felt at ease. But unfortunately the outlook on the horizon was much darker than we could have expected then. But even with our limited knowledge of what was about to come, we were very well aware of one problem that loomed ahead.

"So what are we going to do about my little problem with the patron?" I broke the silence that had settled in after Emil fell asleep. I was understating the severity of the situation though, I didn't feel at all like this was problem was small. And I wasn't even sure if Mathias could offer any protection, if we failed to meet the patron's expectation. I wondered if Mathias had told his father about this, but I highly doubted it. It was unlikely that he would have let us stay, if he knew. He didn't seem too pleased to have us here at all.

"Don't worry about that, I have a plan."

"Really?" I couldn't really bring myself to believe that. I hadn't come up with an idea, and I had spent more time thinking about it than Mathias could ever have.

But he just nodded, grin as broad as ever.

"So what's the plan?"

"I'll tell you tomorrow!" I raised an eyebrow. This plan of his sounded more and more suspicious, but as the even huger grin indicated Mathias would refuse to tell me at all costs, he seemed to enjoy this far too much.

I yawned, realizing just now how tired I was. It had only been this morning that the patron had offered me his 'deal', and now I was sitting in the kitchen of Mathias' home and wondered what our sleeping arrangements would be. As if right on cue, Mathias stood up and carefully lifted Emil in his arms. "He can sleep in the room I prepared for Berwald and Tino for now, until we have another room ready." Berwald and Tino? And who are these people? But I figured they had to be his cousin and friend, that Mathias had been so eager to tell us about. I just shrugged.

"And you are obviously sleeping with me." I automatically opened my mouth to protest, but before I could say anything a load of images came flooding through my mind, and my mouth closed shut, cheeks burning red.

Right, never mind.

I was not really comfortable with sharing a bed with Mathias, but I supposed it didn't matter anymore. We were a kind of couple after all. And maybe sharing with Mathias wouldn't be that bad. I just hoped he didn't snore. But even then, I could still shove a pillow down his throat, if he were too loud.

Mathias, oblivious to the silent threat, carried Emil upstairs; I followed with his also sleeping puffin in hands. I then rushed forward to open the door of one of the rooms down the hall from Mathias', and watched with eagle-eye as Mathias maneuvered my sleeping brother through the threshold. But no one bumped his head and soon Emil was placed under the covers, his puffin cuddled into his arms.

I took a moment to just watch my brother sleep so peacefully, I patted his head and then left the room, Mathias following behind me. "Your brother is cute."

"Leave him alone." My words were emphasized by a punch to his shoulder, but he kept grinning and winked at me. "Don't worry; you're the only one I'm screwing." This time he dived under my punch and into his room, laughing quietly.

I sighed in exasperation, but followed him nonetheless. He had started to rummage through the drawers of his wardrobe until he found the piece of clothing he was apparently looking for. "Here, you can wear this." He tossed me the item and I hold it up and examined it. It was a large shirt, probably long enough to cover me up to my knees.

"Can't let you sleep naked, or else you wouldn't get any sleep at all." He joked and I just rolled my eyes. But then his face was suddenly sincere and he stepped over to where I stood, placing his arms on my shoulders. "But seriously, I won't touch you if you don't want to, ever." I smiled weakly, not sure what one could respond to that, but Mathias seemed happy with that and turned back to the wardrobe to dig into some more. I looked over his shoulders, not surprised at all that the interior was a complete mess. No wonder the shirt had given me was all crinkled.

I retreated into the bathroom to change and get ready for the night, I still felt self-conscious around Mathias even after all we had done today. Maybe that just added to my embarrassment.

Mathias had already changed and gotten into bed, by the time I finally finished my ritual of getting ready for bed. He lied on one side of the bed, holding the blanket up a bit, a clear invitation for me to slip in. But I suddenly felt hesitant, was it really alright for me to sleep together?

"Come on, I won't bite." Mathias patted the spot next to him and smiled encouragingly. Why was I so damn insecure? I climbed in beside him, and he immediately pulled me in his arms and snuggled into me. His breath was warm against my neck, and his arms held me in a comforting embrace. I felt safe.

"So now, who gets up and switches the light off?" "You do:" I grumbled, even though I had been the last one up and neglected to do so in the first place. But with a light chuckle Mathias got up and quickly turned the light off. After a bit of stumbling he plopped back on the bed and snuggled into me once more.

"Good night Lukas, love you." He muttered in my neck and I responded with a vague grunt. I wondered if I would ever be able to say 'I love you'. With that thought in mind I quickly fell asleep, tugged in securely between Mathias' strong arms.


I was woken the next morning from the sun that shone through the windows and directly into my eyes. We had forgotten to draw the curtains close, but Mathias, even though his face was in full light, didn't stir at all. Talk about a clean conscience. Fortunately for me, he hadn't snored, so at least I had gotten a good night's rest. I sat up and squinted to get a look outside. It was early morning, the sun had just risen above the horizon, and the morning mists rose from the fields.

I pondered briefly if I should close the curtains and try to fall asleep again, or if I should get up in favor of breakfast. Mathias grunted something incomprehensible in his sleep, and spread his body out in the space that had been occupied by my sleeping body. He seemed to be like the kind of person who would take up as much space as possible, and only my presence had hindered him to do so. But as soon as I vacated some space, he would instantly claim it.

I shrugged to no myself and cleared the last bit of space, only to be taken over by Mathias immediately. I fought back a smile, as I watched him lying there, limbs stretched out in every possible direction, mouth now half open and slightly drooling. Dammit, he looked almost cute.

I shook that thought from my mind and advanced to the drawer. Intent on finding something that would suit my taste and fit, I began to rummage through the various drawers. I pulled out item after item, but most of them were either too big, or too big and too colorful. Finally I found a seemingly old pair of pants that was almost my size and a shirt that even not my size, had at least some decent coloring. I could have dressed of course in my clothes that lied in a pile in the bathroom, but I had worn them for like three days or something, and I hated unclean clothing.

Mathias didn't wake up through all of this and so I left without a second glance. I checked on Emil's room, but he was sound asleep, puffin in arm, and so I left him alone. The house was empty, a fact I found quite unnerving. In such a big mansion, shouldn't there be much more personnel? But I hadn't encountered a single servant, let alone Mathias' father. Well I wouldn't mind if the latter stayed that way.

I reached the ground floor and made my way to the kitchen, still no living being in sight. How could anyone stand to live in such a big silent house with no one around to talk to? No wonder Mathias had been so eager on getting us to live with him. But at least his cousin would arrive today, so it would get livelier, hopefully.

I pushed open the kitchen door without looking, eyes hung up on a painting I had missed the day before. It depicted some sort of half-human, with the torso and head of a man, and the body of a horse. The muscles and lines of the body were very detailed, the painter had put much effort in painting them. But I couldn't understand why anyone would want to look at something like this, it was far too manly.

The distraction of the painting was enough to carry me into the kitchen and close the door before I noticed that there was someone already in. I stopped dead in my tracks and gazed in silent horror on the man that had to be Mathias' father, for the familiarity was obvious. What should I do? The door had already closed behind me, so I couldn't just leave and act as if nothing happened. Maybe I should just act as if he wasn't there, but no that would be impolite.

"Good morning, you must be… Lukas I presume?" His voice was almost amicably, he didn't seem to mind that much that I had intruded on his morning coffee and I relaxed.

"Good morning, sir, yes I am Lukas." I said politely, bowing my head slightly.

I still stood frozen in the middle of the kitchen, Mathias' father leaning against a counter, sipping his coffee with inclined head and watching me with intense eyes.

"I have to confess I was curious to meet you. For Mathias to voluntarily take up his studies, you definitely had some impact on him." Hell, what did one reply to such a statement?

"Thank you, sir." Was all I could think of.

He set down his cup and approached me, and I fought the urge to step back.

"I hope you don't betray his trust in you." He stated calmly, now standing directly in front of me.

I could just nod.

He then sighed and pushed back the hair that had fallen into his eyes. His hair was as wild and unkempt as Mathias' was; only it was specked with grey here and there. "The way Mathias described you; I figure you are a reliable young man, right what Mathias needs in these unstable times." Something about his words made me squirm; there was some foreboding there, as if he had some knowledge that I had not. He looked at me, his face was serious and his eyes full of concern. He seemed to fight with himself, unsure if he should confide in me whatever it was that unsettled him, or not.

Finally he spoke up, and the serious tone of his voice was demanding all my attention.

"I haven't told Mathias yet, but he will have to know soon. I suppose you know that about 20 years ago our Kingdom was at war with the country of Lactan and that we have, since then, some kind of shaky truce with them." I nodded, I wasn't aware of it in that detail, but it had been thanks to that war, that our King had attempted to purge the country of 'everything filthy' that had led to the tragic events of my conception. He had somehow blamed the rogues and thieves and whatever else he deemed filthy, for all the misery of the war. Or maybe he had just wanted to take it out on someone that the war didn't go as planned.

"But things are about to blow off, right in our faces, the successor of the Lactanian throne has set his eyes upon our lands, and our king is far too eager to thwart their advances in a new war." This, on the other hand, was completely new to me. We lived far away from the capital on the countryside in the Western parts of our kingdom, while Lactan was situated in the east. So maybe the news hadn't reached the townsfolk yet, or else I surely would have known.

But no matter what, this was bad news, our king loved everything that was slightly military, he would parade his army at least twice a year, randomly design new uniforms that would be distributed to only half of the soldiers until the design was changed once again. His birthday and his coronation annual would be celebrated with military parades, salute cannon shooting and fireworks. Even we in our small town, far away from our crazy monarch would occasionally be swept up in the festivities.

And he would have long gone to war with the next best country, even without a reason, but thanks to his thoughtful advisors, he would always change his mind in the last minute. But now things were different, because the aggressor would be someone else, and even though crisis could be averted with careful diplomatic reasoning, the king would never let this chance go to waste.

And Mathias' father who had foreseen this as a possibility had chosen his residence for retiring, as I understood it, he retired early because he was fed up with the king's exploits, in this town, far away from any trouble. And when his informants in the capital had told him that war was becoming more and more of a likeability, he had sent for his son immediately to return. But now the Lactanians had formed a pact with the small kingdom of Orusha in the West, whose border was not far from this very town.

If it came to war and that was inevitable, we would be in immediate danger. And that was the reason he had decided to return to the capital, and try to reason with the king, even though it was probably impossible anyway. And if worst came to worst, he would send for Mathias to move to the capital, because that was still safer than here. But those were all still only possibilities, the alliance between Lactan and Orusha was instable at best, and maybe they wouldn't even join in the war, when our country could make a better offer, and then we would be safer her.

But he didn't truly believe this, and it was better to take precautions, and that was why he chose to leave.

He told me all this in a rush, and I wasn't sure if I got everything, but that didn't matter, because I did get the most important thing; we were going to war. How could it be, that no one out here knew, even though the war was so close to their border? Why hadn't word come from the capital to warn the residents to flee and pack up things? Why didn't the king care at all about his subjects?

And why did he tell me all of this and not Mathias?

"I have to go, I can't wait for Mathias to wake up and adjust. I would have taken him with me, but unfortunately my sister has sent her son here, so he would be safe from the war. And now someone has to stay here, until they arrive, so that they can move into the capital with Mathias." He looked at me, and now all the seriousness was gone, he looked more like a father who was concerned about his only son, vulnerable. "I know this is much to ask, but please take care of my son, he's sometimes much to handle, but he's a good kid and he needs someone to guide him. I would ask Berwald to do it, but they are on somewhat bad terms."

Oh, that didn't sound good at all.

His hand rested on my shoulder and he squeezed it one time, before he let go again. "Tell Mathias everything I have told you just now, I have to go now."

Without another word, he swooped past me and out of the kitchen. Just minutes ago he had been standing here in the kitchen, casually drinking his coffee, as if nothing were amiss. But then again, maybe he had only seemed to be relaxed and at ease, while inwardly he was cursing for his son to wake up and come down.

I sank on a kitchen chair and buried my face in my hands. This was just too much. I couldn't handle a war. Even if we would all move to the capital, circumstances would be dire. And hell, if it weren't for Mathias Emil and I would still live in our small house, oblivious to the impending doom.

I had never been to Orusha, even though the border was near, but I heard that they were skilled warriors and merciless brutes if it came to plundering. I could just hope that the king would stop this foolishness and that Mathias' father could convince him to not go to war and instead try to reason with Lactan. Maybe we should just flee right now, but we couldn't just go without Mathias' cousin, even if they were on bad terms. They were family after all.

And why didn't Mathias tell me that they had a strained relationship, I always assumed they were good friends, the way Mathias talks of his visitors.

This was definitely bad.

And I had to be the one to break Mathias the news.

My stomach was churning, I tried nonetheless to eat some food, I would need it, I was sure of it. But it was hard to push anything past the sickening knot in my chest.

War was looming ahead, and I was afraid.

...