Important author's note at the end! So stick around!
Anyway, here's hoping the length of this chapter makes up for the wait, and for the end.
.
Here I was, on the road again. Oh, joy! Oh, rapture!
In all honesty, I didn't think it was too bad. A little more walking than I wanted in general, but I had good boots. I had even gotten actual pants before I left, and a belt—with pouches! I'm that much closer to a fantasy game protagonist. Plus, the more complicated and long-lasting curses needed herbs and other ingredients, so it was kind of a necessity. The maid I talked to gave me a weird look when I insisted on getting the tunic back too, but I mean, it was a gift from Frederick. (Sorta.)
If it gets torn again, I'll try sewing it myself. Call me selfish, but I'd much rather keep the stuff I got from the Shepherds than just switch it out for something a stranger handed me.
Speaking of Shepherd gifts! When Robin had come by to confirm I was packed—with what little possessions I had—he had handed over what looked like a leather vest, and a new mage hat. I'd put the latter on as he told me, "This will hopefully reduce the likelihood of you getting injured without reducing your mobility. The scuffle with the wyvern was... a pretty close call."
"Trust me," I'd muttered, "I know." Glimpsing a transformed Zant that morning had nearly given me a panic attack. I swear to god, if I develop a dragon phobia because of that shit, I'm going to be SO pissed.
The vest had been put over the tunic, tied shorter now that I had pants. Maybe it was too many layers—but hey, more trouble for blades and talons to get through! "Thanks, Robin!"
He had smiled back, far more cheerful than was fair that early. "No thanks necessary! I'll talk to you on the patrol."
But for the first stretch of marching, I was pretty much left to my own thoughts. Miriel was walking with her book open, Robin and Chrom were at the head of the group, and the others were having a rousing discussion without me.
...to be more accurate, the others were having a rousing discussion around Lon'qu. Vaike was trying to get him to agree with something, but the myrmidon wasn't having it.
We had an eight-man group, which I guessed could split into four-person squads, or whatever size might be necessary. It was me, Chrom, Robin, Stahl, Sully, Vaike, Lon'qu and Virion. Zant seemed to be scouting the skies with the Pegasus Knights back in Ylisstol. Frederick was with Lissa and the Exalt. And Maribelle... needed some time with Ricken. I didn't blame her, prickly or not.
I had stopped by before leaving for patrol. Maribelle, of course, had looked at me with her usual disdain. But Ricken had surprisingly brightened, sitting straighter in his cot. I learned why when (after calling me "the lady who got hit by a wyvern") he asked how Miriel and I had done the magic shield. I was too relieved that he seemed to be feeling better to question whether sharing the information to a patient would be wise.
Eh, I'm sure Maribelle will keep him in line. And I harbored the hope that he could focus his energies on furthering his arcane studies. He's a bright kid. It would be awful if he survived that battle only to lose his spark.
I couldn't dwell on these things for long, as Vaike grappled me into his armpit to get my support in his tournament idea. (Well, it became a tournament by Sully's suggestion. Vaike just wanted to fight people.) He was lucky I didn't zap him. My punch to his ribs was about as effective as a kitten. Stahl broke up our arguing to get their conversation back on track.
"I mean, for once, Vaike isn't wrong: It would make us test our abilities, and with war on the horizon that might not be a bad idea."
"Har har! See? ...wait, what d'ya mean, "for once"—"
I didn't really agree. "We can just spar and get the same results, can't we?" This isn't really the time to be putting efforts and resources into planning some big hoolie-doolie. But Vaike was making a big deal, and Sully wanted to force Lon'qu to give her his all. I gave up and took out a book. Miriel had the right idea.
The attempt to do my own reading was interrupted later by Sully, who had steered her horse to walk closer. "So... Why'd you decide to learn dark magic?"
I blinked, glancing up from my singular dark tome. "Hm? Oh. Well... it's another kind of magic. Of course I want to learn it." It might've just been because I'm an outsider, but to me it all looked interesting, and I didn't have the Ylissean bias against dark mages.
Sully's face twisted at my answer. "But... it's dark!"
"So's the night, but we still sleep in it." This got a scoff. I shrugged, shutting my book again. Defending my decision to study dark magic was getting real old, real fast. "It's just another weapon, just like a sword or lance. I'm also reading up on light magic, if that makes you feel any better. Have to wait until I can pick Lissa's brain some more."
The princess had informed me that the vulneraries are considered "temporary fixes" because they mega-boost the body's natural abilities, and you always wanted a healer to double-check if the healing had happened smoothly. It was also a practice to dissuade people from relying too heavily on them. Some of these dangers were often overlooked in the middle of war as opposed to peace time, to try pushing soldiers farther than normal. I hadn't realized magical overdoses were possible. But I guess that makes sense, it's just fantasy medicine. The intricacies of magic and the society around it were really interesting to me.
"So yer an egghead like Miriel," Sully concluded.
"Sure? Magic's just, really cool. I don't have any back home."
"No magic?"
"Nope." Unless you are a practicing witch of some sort, but that can't ever compare to THIS magic.
"Huh... you really don't come from around here, then."
That made me snort. "I could sing you my country's national anthem to prove it."
Virion gave a half-bow on my other side. "It would be as a siren's song, bewitching the hearts of us gallant men!" I gave him a look, but he didn't back down, merely arching a brow in smug challenge. He better watch out, one of these days...
Sully rolled her eyes too. "Psh, no thanks. It's just... weird, I guess."
Now that was something I was used to hearing. "Yep! That's me, the weirdo." I wasn't annoyed at this point, just amused. The Shepherds have a lot of those running around.
"You are a refined woman with exquisite tastes!"
"Nah, she's pretty weird."
Still, as Virion and Sully argued over my head, I wondered how I was going to get others to understand I wasn't looking for "unlimited cosmic power" or anything sinister. To me, it was all just a tool.
It was what you did with the tool that really mattered. That was what I really worried about. I had used wind, fire, lightning and dark spells for the battle at the cliffs. To save others, and to kill others. Several Plegians, whether bad or simply following orders, had been injured or killed because of me. It was up to me to make sure that I only ever caused harm when I meant to, when not doing so would get others killed, and for a cause I was willing to fight for.
I wonder how often my parents had that on their minds, when they joined the army.
I sank into these thoughts for the rest of the day, everyone else focusing on possible locations and dates for a tournament when we returned to Ylisstol.
We made our way further southeast, until we stopped in a town called Landell for the night. The people were of course very welcoming for their prince and his merry band of Shepherds. But they didn't have a whole lot of room. They still accommodated us as best they could, tying up horses and setting us up in their largest barn. Miriel, Sully and I were at one corner, and the rest of the guys divided themselves between two others.
'You forgot Kellam," I told Robin, once he'd finished thanking the generous farmer. (It took me a whole day to realize it, sadly.)
He faltered, and then he swore under his breath. "I knew I was forgetting to ask someone." He grimaced. It probably didn't sound good for a tactician to forget about one of his own. Good thing I kept my voice down. He gave a rueful smile. "You've been keeping track of him?"
"It's more I try to remind myself to look out for him. I asked him to tap my shoulder every so often." Because while he might be proud of his invisibility, it sounded pretty lonely. Patting Robin's back, I beamed and gave a finger gun. "Make it up to him when we get back!"
"...what was that?"
"What? Oh. That's a finger gun, and it's this... gesture that kind of a silly, ironic thing?" He didn't look any more enlightened. "Don't worry about it, it's just me being silly."
"Right." Robin shook his head at me, amused. I grinned back, glad to be entertaining.
Then a thoughtful look came over him, like the cogs were once more a-turnin' in his noggin. Keeping his voice angled low, he asked, "Have you come up with anything new?"
"Anything new?" He probably meant with magic, but, what made him think I had anything?
"I've noticed you were using magic on the march," he explained, "testing things and writing notes. You've been keeping busy."
I blinked. Did he know about my little nighttime practices, too? When I couldn't fall asleep, I'd go mess around with magic until I got tired. Guess I shouldn't be surprised. I would've offered him my notes, but my handwriting with a quill pen is awful when sitting still, let alone marching. So instead I replied, "Sometimes I get inspired by random thoughts. But I haven't had any large "aha" moments, no."
"I see. So, a thought occurred to me. There are some staves—advanced ones—that can create barriers."
"Oh, yeah!" I hadn't used them often when playing the game, but I at least knew of their existence. "It's probably some real fancy light magic!"
Robin chuckled at my description. "Well, they are rather expensive. Unfortunately, they only work on one person per casting, too—and they're specifically for protection against magic. Still useful, but not as all-purpose as we were hoping."
Someone out there had to have modified those, though. Was there a black market for magic items? Maybe once Gaius or Anna joined the team, we could look into the shadier options.
For now, I told the tactician, "Well, that'll still be better than nothing. Obviously we can't just shell out that kind of cash at the drop of a hat, but maybe that's something to look into, if we can't figure out how to make our own. Shields might be done a bit differently than healing staves, but..." Maybe Lissa or Maribelle would know more? Hell, or the Exalt. It wouldn't be bothering her to ask, would it?
"Good point. But, hey! It's a start!" We grinned at each other, being excited little nerds. We'd have to talk to Miriel about this later. It's too late to start brainstorming right now. Robin wrote a small note in his tome and asked, "Anything else you've been working on?"
"Not really. Still trying to perfect the "launching myself with wind" thing."
"Don't slam into anything again." Robin chuckled when I shoved him. What a turd.
"No promises!" I playfully huffed at him, crossing my arms and lifting my nose. "For your information, I stuck the landing last time."
"You mean, when you vaulted up a flight of stairs? Miriel was not happy about that, by the way—"
"I did it at the cliffs, too! And yeah, trust me, I remember her lecture." I spied her not too far from our conversation, but she was thankfully engrossed in a book. She better be careful with that lantern, or the entire barn will go up in flames. "But it's useful, and I'd say I'm getting pretty good at it, too!"
He laughed, patting my shoulder. "I know, I know. Just, be careful when you practice, all right? Maybe I'll join you one of these days."
"When your face isn't stuck in a history book or glued to a map," I shot back.
He lightly shoved me away, I blew a raspberry, and then we went to our corners of the barn. Flopping into the hay was a mistake, because it wasn't as comfy as I thought it was going to be. Sully snorted. I stuck my tongue at her too before turning my back to her. Blech, hay in my mouth. At least we had four walls and a roof, even if the place kind of smelled.
"You know, we hardly know anything about you," Chrom began, interrupting my daydreaming the next day. He had slowed down a tad to catch me in conversation. C-Rank? But we haven't even fought together, I joked internally. He elaborated, "Besides your being kidnapped from a distant country, I mean. So, tell me about yourself!"
"Uh," I eloquently replied.
I had half a mind to do to him what I'd done to Robin the first time we talked, but that would be recycling a joke—which I'd be totally fine with on other occasions. I saw the look the tactician was giving me, though, and decided against it. Instead I asked, "Like what?" Because where the hell was I supposed to start?
He frowned. "Er... well, what are your hobbies?"
Writing fanfiction about a world I thought was fiction, but I can't tell YOU that. "I'm pretty boring. I read, write, and play video games. And go to work."
"Vi-de-o games?"
"Er, it's just another name for games where I come from. The longer name." I didn't feel like explaining television screens and electrical cords and all of that. Moving on! "Anyway, this is the most I've been outside in... a long time. Since I graduated, actually."
His eyebrows rose. "You went to a college?"
"What? Oh. You guys don't have public education." Jael had been surprised too. Navigating differences between worlds was kind of a pain. "Uhh, so, basically we have school houses all over, and all kids are required to be taught from certain ages. Homeschooling is less common. College is the extra schooling you can buy after normal schooling. I did some college, but, life got in the way, so." And isn't that the story of so many people these days.
"Hmm... it sounds like your America is very prosperous."
I snorted, again. "That's exactly what Jael said. Er, a guy in Ferox." Scratching at my arm, I admitted, "There are still poor people, and homeless people, and all of that fun stuff. For all that's different, a lot stays the same. We just don't have magic and Risen where I'm from."
"I see..." Chrom was obviously interested in my country—which honestly, get in line—but he put it aside to continue his mission to Get to Know the Weirdo. "You mentioned you're a writer? What do you write?"
Oh for fuck's sake— The one thing I wanted to avoid! Time to deflect! At least I had a good poker face; no one suspects the goofy one.
"Mostly fantasy and comedy stuff. Some romance, but, eh. It's all for fun, I don't get, like, published or anything. Not yet, anyway." That was the eventual goal. Now if only I had stopped writing so many fanfics and focused on my own original work before I got here...
Chrom was smiling about something. "So, you're an aspiring writer. That's admirable. Heh, will you be writing a story about your adventures here, then?"
"Well, now I'll have to," I joked back. "You guys will need someone to write your story the right way. Who doesn't glance over your less-than-princely qualities for the sake of image!"
His stride faltered. Looking at my wide grin, he forced a laugh. "W-well, honesty is the... best policy?"
"Yep!" To a point. Otherwise that'd be cruel. I couldn't help giggling at the look on his face. Maybe I'll leave out the poster incident, at least. With a half-mocking pat on his bare shoulder, I reasurred, "Don't worry, I won't be that mean. I'll be pointing out all my blunders, too."
"Small favors, I suppose..." He sighed, relaxing again as he gave me another friendly smile. What a nice dude. "At least I can count on you to be there to write the truth."
I gave a jaunty salute. "Aye aye, captain! The truth, and lots of dumb jokes!"
His attention was brought back to Robin, and I couldn't help watching them chat. Already, they were best buds, Chrom grabbing the tactician's shoulder and laughing. How old were they? Eighteen? Man, those were the days, just hanging with my buds. Sometimes I forget Chrom's a prince, and Robin's an amnesiac. Seeing how happy they were made me that much more determined to do what I could. I didn't want that friendship to be consumed by a wyrm of despair.
What Chrom had mentioned stuck in my mind, though. Hmm... to write about our adventures...
Maybe I would start keeping a journal, to keep track of what was going on. It would be a good way to vent. I knew there would be more dark moments for me in the future. I had been itching to write anyway, ever since penning that letter to Kail. Even a barebones account would do! Taking notes on magic just wasn't the same. And I could compare what's happened to what was supposed to, and try to plan for the changes as best I could. I asked Miriel about getting a blank book, but she said I would have to commission someone back at the capital for that. A shame, but I could scribble down thoughts and important facts on spare parchment until then. In the meantime...
I decided to test out some new ideas.
I could fling myself into the air, and if I practiced I'm sure I could adjust the arc. But in Smash Brothers, Robin had been able to do a second elwind, which would change their trajectory a bit. Could I manage that here? Maybe not to do anything cool like dodge an arrow mid-jump, but it'd be nice to have a chance to redirect in case my aim was off. Plus it could double as an attack.
It was about as close to flying I was going to get without learning how to ride a flying mount. If tiny me could even handle that. So after camp was set up that evening, I decided it wouldn't be amiss to do some experiments while the others settled in.
I had several flights into bushes and skids across the dirt before I was finally happened upon by Stahl and Lon'qu. An interesting pair. I had to shove away the thought that I hadn't remembered them having support conversations in the game. Lon'qu didn't stick around, but Stahl helped get the leaves out of my hair. He was obviously concerned about the dangers of this, so he went to grab something for the small cuts I'd collected. Now that I think about it, infection is probably VERY dangerous in this place. I felt like an idiot.
I watched him go… and eyed the branches again. I had been really close that last time. Just one more try!
I stared at my feet. I had to shoot below me, and then below-and-behind me. Right? Right. Double-checking where I wanted to go, I turned sideways, glanced between my feet and the tree one final time, and took a deep breath.
"I can do this!"
Unfortunately, yet predictably, it didn't turn out so well. I launched at just the right angle... to slam my stomach into the lower branch.
"Fuck!"
The world blurred as I spun over the branch, and then the wind was knocked out of me again. I think I blacked out briefly. I eventually found myself staring up at the darkening sky. Stahl was hovering over me.
...Or I assumed it was him, because my glasses weren't on my face. Shit, where had they gone. Wait, no, that was Lon'qu muttering. He was near me? Was the world ending? No, he just thought I'd killed myself like an idiot. A reasonable assumption. My back was killing me. Probably because I landed on a root. I tried to get up before deciding that, yeah, no, the ground was perfect for now. Going back over what had happened, I closed my eyes and tried to breathe deeply. Something touched my shoulders. Wait, never mind. There was just a prickly sensation all over.
"Eurgh... woman—"
"Man," I bit out.
"Are you injured? Can you move?"
Nothing was broken, but everything hurt, so I muttered, "I think I'll just stay here for a bit."
"What—Megan! What did you do?" Footsteps hurried over, and now I could see the glint of armor.
Lon'qu stood to turn. "Be care—"
Crunch!
"—ful."
Shit. I closed my eyes again, groaning softly. "That... wouldn't be my glasses, would it?"
"Erm..." Another softer crunch. After a beat, Stahl admitted, "Y-yeah. I'm sorry, I noticed just too late. The frames are a little bent... but the lenses are still intact!"
"Thank ye gods of yore," I muttered. I can fix that. Bracing, I flung myself into an upright position, growling and hissing like an injured animal. Maybe I was a bit dramatic. "...Motherfucker. Well... nothing's broken."
"Didn't I tell you to wait," Stahl scolded as he placed the glasses in my outstretched hand.
I squinted at the frames, trying to delicately bend them back into place. "You said "hold on." " And here starts another lecture. Hm, maybe I'M the problem.
"Isn't that the same thing?" He sighed, before taking them once more and kneeling beside me. There was a small tin in his hand, which had some sort of goop that he dabbed on my face. It stung, but he ignored my wince. "Lon'qu, do you have any water left in your canteen?"
"Yes." So it was tossed in the cavalier's direction, and then Lon'qu made his way back towards the rest of camp. Shouting an exasperated "thanks" after him pulled at aching muscles. I grimaced.
"Ow."
Stahl finished and put the glasses back on my face. Then he gave me this Look. "You're lucky it's just an "ow." Remember, we don't have any healers with us right now."
"Yeah... I know." Man, all of this getting hurt stuff can tire a guy out.
"Maybe you should practice something a bit less ambitious." He wet a rag with the canteen before handing it over, gesturing at his face and neck. I dabbed at the dried blood on mine—when had that gotten there?—as he continued, "Or get a sparring partner, like Robin."
That's right, he'd said something about that. Now I felt really stupid. But the way Stahl said it made it sound like he didn't think I could do it.
He must've noticed my frustration, because he sighed again and offered to help me up. Once I was on my own two feet again, his head turned and he cleared his throat. "You might want to, uh, change your shirt."
"What, why... oh goddammit."
The branch had torn my tunic, leaving my midriff exposed. Not that that means much, considering. At this point, I had to have flashed enough people in Awakening World to be reported back home.
"I only had this shirt back for two days! Ow."
Stahl watched the stars. "Where's your coat? And your vest and hat, for that matter."
"Easier to fly with less weight."
"Right." Stahl sounded somewhere between exasperated and just accepting that I was beyond help. He turned at the sound of footsteps, greeting, "Oh, Lon'qu—welcome back?"
"Lon'qu?" I turned. "Phh—blegh!" Soaring fabric had caught me off guard. I flailed, then scrambled to catch the shirt before it hit the dirt. Wait, was he giving this to me? I was getting a collection. And what a misunderstanding that would cause. The material was a bit thick for Ylissean weather, but I could deal with heat. Maybe that means it's sturdier. "Uh, thank you!"
Stahl examined the myrmidon, then the shirt. "It's… a bit large on you."
"What? Me, being shorter than Lon'qu? Crazy talk." The guy was about the same height as Frederick and Robin, who were practically giants, especially compared to me. I'd have to tie this shirt instead of bunching up the end to knot, since this fabric wasn't as easy to work with. Cultural differences, or just different seamstresses? "I can make it work. Thank you!"
Lon'qu exhaled. "You've already said that." I shrugged. He turned to leave again, and quickly backpedaled when I took a step after him. "S-stay back, woman!"
"Wait! While I have you here—can I please have some tea? Pretty please? I'll pay you for it!" He'd had some the night before and it was killing me. The aroma was tantalizing, and I wanted to cling to the familiarity of it.
"Ngh, j-just—don't move! Gods. Not now."
He actually pinched his nose before leaving much faster than he'd arrived. Frederick's contagious.
Stahl turned around to let me shimmy into the new shirt, then offered to take the ripped one. I shook my head. "I can fix it up." I folded the tunic over my arm. "Some needle and thread, and it'll be good as new!"
"That's true... You could just get a new one, though. That actually fits you."
"Nah. It works just fine." I shrugged under his questioning gaze. "I mean… all the things I have are gifts from other people, so…" Now he was making me feel awkward about it. It just felt like a waste to toss this one. At the very least, it could be used as makeshift bandages.
The cavalier's gaze shifted over my shoulder as he hummed. "I guess when you don't have much, you have to make do with what you've got."
"Yeah. I mean, I'm lucky to have clothes on my back, and some books to read," I laughed. I thought about that a lot, even before coming to Awakening World. Like I'd mentioned before, my mother worked hard when I was growing up to provide me and my brother with what she could. I guess that's why I have this sort of mentality, at least in part. It certainly saved me some trouble.
He nodded, a little distracted. Did he have something on his mind? But he shook it away and gestured at camp. "Anyway, you should probably hang it up for tonight, and get some rest."
"Psh, okay, dad." I stuck my tongue out at him. He chuckled and walked beside me as I commented, "I feel like I've got, like, twenty parents in the Shepherds." His snort had me grinning. "Or maybe it's twenty children. Hard to tell sometimes."
Stahl and I watched as Vaike tried, and failed, to walk across a dying campfire without injuring himself.
"...I can see your point."
I wasn't too happy that I had the "ache in my bones" thing again—thanks, wyvern rider—but at least it gave me fair warning for the weather.
We were lucky to reach the coastal city of Hawk's Landing just as dark clouds rolled in to unleash hell. I threw my coat over my bag to keep the books dry. Stahl, the saint he was, offered his shield like an umbrella as we clustered under some cover. Lon'qu looked about ready to leap back into the deluge when Miriel pushed into his personal space, but she cared more about her own tomes than his comfort. I sympathized with them both.
Chrom and Robin ran out to hunt down some lodgings for the evening, so they were drenched when they returned. I couldn't help laughing at the tactician trying to blow a stray hair out of his face. He got his revenge when I stepped out right as what felt like a few gallons slid off of the roof. Stahl had taken my bag, but running had undone my sloppy bun, so I had hair over my face like I was from The Grudge. It made navigating tight spaces fun.
"W-woman!" Oops, guess I'd bumped into Lon'qu.
"Sor—plegh! Ach, ptooie… S-sorry!" I tried to part the curtain and blink through the rain.
"My lady! Hold a moment!"
I jumped when Virion's fingers went to my neck, but stopped mid-smack when I realized he was just tying my hair back with a ribbon. He's being useful, not a creep. I had to spit out some hair before I could thank him.
"I'm afraid it isn't a quality ribbon for such an exquisite lady like yourself! But it will do until you can have a proper wash."
I snorted. "I haven't had a proper wash since I got here. Unless you count this. Or a river." After clearing my nose, my attention went to a floral scent I hadn't quite noticed until now. Wait a second. "Virion, do you have shampoo… Or soap?"
The man probably would have flipped his hair, if it wasn't stuck to his neck from the rain like mine. "But of course! I must ensure my appearance is at its best, even on the road." He was startled when I poked his sternum. "A-ahem! Is something the matter?"
"You're sharing your soap," I told him. "I'll give you… I don't know, a good hex or something in exchange. Or money." I'd get that eventually.
He hummed, considering. "...Or perhaps, you could ask me over dinner?"
I gave him a look. Was he really? "Virion... we all eat together, as a group."
He wasn't fazed. "With the exception of the Shepherds who go their separate ways after grabbing their rations. Like you. Always the solitary young maiden, sequestering herself and her lovely smile away to pour over tomes!"
Oh, yeah, because I get sooo much privacy with these guys. He had the smuggest look on his face, and I barely refrained from smacking him after all. What was he up to now? I felt like he was tactic-ing me, similar to conversations with Robin. Was he really going to try again to get some "tea" from me? Hadn't I already made myself clear? Maybe he was too stubborn to back off for long. I'd have to educate him if that were the case. No means no, home slice.
"Sure," I finally answered, tone steely. Squinty-eyes activated. "Dinner."
"Just the two of us," he clarified. Smart man.
"Yup. Just two friends and some plates of grub."
He seemed more amused than deterred by the reminder. "It will be as you say, milady!" Maybe he was just having fun. There wouldn't be much privacy at the inn anyway, so it would have to be at a later date. ...ha. Maybe I can figure out his game before then.
As I'd expected, the Shepherds ate together before the downstairs closed for the evening. Though the storm still raged outside, the fires in the hearth and the kitchen kept the inn rather toasty, and the jovial atmosphere lifted our spirits further. An offhand comment from the owner about pirates had Chrom worried about Fenis Island right off the coast, though. So he declared (on-the-spot, as he does) we would set sail on a detour tomorrow. Robin, after ensuring that was what the prince wanted, didn't try to convince him otherwise. He instead began planning for every contingency he could.
"I hope everyone has their sea legs," he joked.
Funnily enough, I ended up sat between Virion and Vaike for dinner. I had to choose between being squashed by Mr. Pecs or getting really acquainted with Smug Shampoo Man. It wasn't the craziest gathering I've had a meal with, but it was definitely the first where I was encouraged to have an eating contest. Too bad they only had water or ale.
Hours later, I suddenly shot up out of bed to run and get sick out the window. Maybe I was too stubborn about finishing that pint. But if I was honest, it was more caused by what I had woken up from.
So much for the few nights of peace.
Sully sat up, rubbing at her face. "Hmwha? ...Megan? Y'okay?"
I tried to spit to clear my mouth, but now it was too dry. Shit, I hate puking—it sucks before, during, and after. My arms left my stomach to grasp for the water pitcher on the stand. Soon enough, the cavalier's hand was at my back. She pushed me out of the room, to avoid disturbing Miriel.
"Let's take care of that and get you back in bed." She also waved off a concerned Robin. Did I wake him up too, or was he still reading?
I didn't really want to—go back to sleep, that is. I decided to take the pitcher out, cleaning the mess beneath our window as best I could. Sully helped with a shovel, and figured out pretty quickly that I was stalling.
"What's up? Dinner not sit right?"
I shook my head. "...it was fine. I'm good now." I was obviously quiet to avoid waking more people. But I was also a bit distracted. I don't want to see those images again. It had been... an exceptionally bad one.
Why? I had no fucking idea. I never understood it, even before coming to Awakening World. I would have a fantastic day, wouldn't even go to bed worried about anything, and suddenly I'd be subjected to my worst fears or graphic, terrible things. It would come out of nowhere, much like this one had, and suckerpunch me in the gut—though they hadn't come nearly this often, or made me get physically ill. Wonderful, they're evolving. Not that I was surprised, with the new awfulness of war in my life. Why not slap some traumatic experiences on top of my traumatic experiences? And if they weren't terrifying, they were depressing.
Still, they were way more frequent here than back home. What was causing that? Was it all kickstarted by seeing death literally in front of my face or something?
Sully leaned into my field of view, eyeing me. Guess I'd gone back to hugging myself. "Then what is it? Bad dream?"
I couldn't help a bitter laugh. "Yeah." The punch to my shoulder caught me off-guard. "Ow!"
"Aw, that didn't hurt, you nut." She grinned, reassuring, "It's just a stupid dream. That crap won't hurt you, either."
I smiled back to show I appreciated her attempt, but it hadn't helped much. All of the logic in the world wouldn't quash fear so easily. At least she hadn't asked for details. I waved her off, telling her I'd be back up in a minute. She patted my back before she left, reminding me everything was fine.
She was right. Everything was fine. For now. But, seeing flesh rent by steel or charred by fire, I knew the nightmares were the least of my concern. They just reminded me of the worries I already had. I need to be ready, for whatever may come. I leaned against the wall of the inn, sliding down to focus on not hyperventilating. Another panic attack, so soon? I needed to cut that shit out.
It took a little time, but I wrestled the anxiety back into its box. Before I went upstairs, I admired the patch of sky visible, thankful that the storm had passed rather quickly.
I just had to prepare for the next one.
It was a bit exciting, at least, to be on a ship—or was it a boat? Eh, whatever. I would've been more enthusiastic if I had gotten better sleep. As it was, it had been embarrassing to hear some of the others' concern the next morning. How many had I woken up by puking my guts out? Virion gave me a freaking handkerchief, for crying out loud.
"Maybe you didn't eat enough before drinking," Stahl commented, to which I rolled my eyes.
THAT piss water? Well, better to let them think I can't handle my alcohol than to explain the dreams. Lon'qu probably had the right idea, keeping his a secret. Though he didn't seem to drink anyway.
This did mean that Robin suggested I take a nap below deck. The worrywart. Whereas on the way to Themis I had been stubborn and refused, this time I decided to take him up on the offer. Unfortunately, it was difficult to sleep with the constant motion, and I missed seeing how the sun glistened on the waters. It was still better than being miserable on deck. By the time we arrived at the island, I felt a little more human and a bit less disconnected.
It was easier, this time around. I could let others care, instead of shutting down and avoiding everyone. It also helped that it wasn't right after a rather brutal battle. I even managed to joke as we reassembled carts, unloaded and led the horses off of the boat. The others were pleased that I was "feeling more like myself again."
Joke's on them, I thought ruefully, I am a complex and multifaceted mess at all times.
Of course, Chrom was already talking to the people at the docks, to get more details on the trouble he'd heard about yesterday. Apparently the fort here had been overrun with bandits. Surprise, surprise. I had thought about it on the boat, and I realized that Fenis Island had to be the place that Donnel was recruited at. After all, if this was the Outrealms island, someone would've said something by now. I made a mental note to investigate the gate another time, after we made sure everything here was in tiptop shape.
A plus to coming all the way out here was the delicious seafood! Stahl, Vaike and I were all too happy to take a little stroll while the leaders figured out how we were going to retake the fort.
"Just be mindful," Robin told us. "There's been some trouble around here, thanks to those bandits. And we're going to head out before too long."
I gave him a goofy salute, shouting, "Aye, aye, capitán!"
There were all sorts of saltwater fish in the market, and a few stalls that would quickly fry one up for you. Stahl was only limited by his wallet, because his stomach was surely endless. Thankfully, he offered me a bite, probably because I was eyeing his food.
"Oy!" Vaike shouted when the cavalier bought me a fillet, "Where's Teach's share?!"
"She doesn't have any money," Stahl pointed out, hand moving to my head. I leaned away with a grunt, but he seemed to have done it on automatic. I may be hella short, but that doesn't make me a kid, guys! He told my faint sulk, "We really need to see Robin about that, when we're back at the capital."
No kidding. I already had some debts to repay. I scarfed down the fish and moved down the line as the two of them argued a little more. It just added to the noise of the market, where dock workers shouted about unloading cargo and merchants hawked their products. There was a lot of shouting here, actually. I examined the people going about their daily lives, either chatting about the weather or the latest gossip, or working at their stalls or shops. They were doing fairly well for themselves for a city off the coast, I thought.
So many people, living their lives far removed from the troubles of the capital. It's kinda like back home. But with dragons and magic. We'd have to knock these bandits out fast for the innocents here.
I realized after a bit of people-watching that the sun was already on its descent, casting shadows across the city. Which was a shame. It felt like we'd just got here. But I guess we're not here on vacation. That sucks. I looked around. "Huh." I had no clue where the other two had went. Probably should've been paying better attention to that, instead of wandering to the end of the market. Then again, why hadn't they found me yet?
Someone tapped my shoulder. I turned, half expecting it to be Stahl. But a hand clamped over my mouth before I was yanked into an alcove, hat twisting to the cobblestone.
"Not a peep," a man hissed into my ear. Something pressed against my throat.
...fuck.
A few minutes unattended, and I get into some trouble. My luck really was shit.
"No money on 'er," a man griped, shoving me to the ground. "Just a potion. More's the pity."
Yes, I'm broke, I get it!
My hands were bound, and I was surrounded by bandits itching to do something with their blades. Someone flip the Days Since I Was Last Kidnapped counter back to zero. All of the self-defense tips I'd gotten back home had vanished the moment the man had me, and I was pissed at myself for it. I had magic now, too! What kind of Shepherd was I?
I wasn't alone this time, but I couldn't really say that was a good thing. There were a bunch of scared people gathered here, in what looked like the remains of a fort. Oh look, I found the bandit camp. Wonderful. There wasn't much I could do with my hands behind me, against all of these assholes. I was just another helpless victim.
A bandit kicked an older man over. They joked about leaving him hanging in the port as a warning, as "he was so ugly and weak." Anger burned in my chest.
"Good haul, boys!" A man came swaggering up to thump another on the back, laughing. He had a belly on him, stripes of paint across his front, and easily called everyone's attention with his words. "We'll clear out and see how much these ones sell for!"
I glanced at the sky, finally dark. The Shepherds had to have noticed my absence by now, unless Kellam had rubbed off on me. I hoped they would come soon. The fish from earlier churned in my stomach as the men leered at us women.
They had to, right? They'd come in and kick some ass, and I wouldn't have to play damsel yet again.
...no, I can't wait for them.
I took a deep breath. Held it. Then exhaled.
I can't just expect things to turn out fine if I do nothing.
I couldn't do much, but I had to do what I could. Inching closer to another prisoner, I asked him, "Where are we?" His gaze darted around before he ducked his head.
"A fort," he breathed, barely audible. Thanks, I knew that, genius.
"Where? From the port," I clarified quickly.
"I-I... it's northeast?"
"Oy! Quit yappin'!"
He clammed up, unwilling to risk the bandits' wrath. I understood, but I needed more. If the town was southwest, then... dammit it, where was southwest, though? I should've paid more attention to the sun. I had to get someone else to talk. The woman behind the first guy was watching me, brows furrowed. She would do.
"Which way's southwest," I asked, leaning. The others would notice too much movement. It took me a bit to understand, but I finally noted the corner her gaze indicated. "Is it just woods that way?"
"Y-yes... though, there is a path—"
We both went silent as Swag Man came closer. He at least didn't seem to be focused on us. But we couldn't speak anymore without risking being overheard, and I didn't want their attention on me if I was going to be a dumbass and try anything.
I didn't really have anything to work with, though. At best, I knew there was a path somewhere southeast, which I would guess would lead to town if this had once been the Farfort that Chrom mentioned. I could try to break out and book it down that path, but I needed to free my hands, and that's assuming I wouldn't get caught, or axed. Though, if they wanted to sell us, they might at least avoid "damaging the merchandise." But I couldn't count on that to save me once I started fighting back. It would also leave all of these people here with the bandits, which made me uneasy. How could I dare to save my own skin and not theirs?
Closing my eyes to try envisioning the game's layout for this fort was fruitless. Adrenaline was making my heart pound in my ears. It's impossible to focus on what I remember from a fucking video game, if it's even accurate!
But I had to stay calm. I couldn't freak out here. I had to think like Robin would: Collected, logical, aiming minimal casualties. I wasn't cut out for this, but I had to try.
Okay, take stock of things—
"A'right, on yer feet! And don' try anythin' funny!"
Dammit, dammit, dammit! Were they taking us somewhere? That couldn't be good.
Okay, focus! How many of them are here? The fact that it was night and a mob of people was standing up made it difficult to see everything, but with the flickering torches I could guess there were more than eight bandits in this part of the fort. Who knows how many wait around the corners. There were some partial walls around us, with gaps south and west. A straight shot to the south path would be the best bet, but two guys with axes waited there and I wasn't confident I could dodge them both. I doubted the villagers would want to contend with them, either.
I apologized softly for bumping into a woman, but she hardly seemed to notice. She was muttering, and my planning was put on hold when I tuned in. Did she say "Donny"?
"Ma'am?" Lightly bumping her again, I asked once I had her full attention, "Did anyone get away?"
"...M-my son," she answered, casting a nervous glance at our nearby guards. "I... I just hope he's okay!"
"He is," I reassured, hoping I wasn't a liar. After all, I've learned how the game isn't always one-hundred percent accurate to this reality. But I continued, only for her ears, "I need you to keep quiet, but I know there are some warriors on their way right now."
"W-what?"
I shook my head to remind her to keep her voice down. A man was eyeing us warily. Pretending I was leaning on her for support, I tried to keep my sound and mouth movement to a minimum. Pardon the lisp, lady, but "s" is the loudest fucking sound ever.
"The Shepherds, led by Prince Chrom. I'm sure they found your kid. They were already on their way here."
Donnel's mother ducked her head, trying to dry her eyes on the shoulder of her shirt. She whispered, "How can you be so sure?"
"Because I'm one of them. We just need to stall, or..." Or something. Robin really was much better at this.
Think back to the cliff battle. It was disjointed and painful, but the memories could give me ideas for this situation. Assuming I could get out of these retraints, there were some spells I had in mind. Unfortunately, I couldn't do the arcane shield by myself, or at least not large enough to cover all of these people. And anything like the icy flames I'd used back there would tear my insides up, which I couldn't risk right now and especially not without a healer on the way. Lissa told me not to rely on vulneraries for the more serious stuff. Those were better for lesser wounds, like shallow cuts and lacerations.
...wait.
Letting some of the others get ahead, I focused on drawing magic forth. Wind magic, like what had scarred my palms, would be too noticable—same with fire and lightning. But I'm no ordinary mage. The fact that night had fallen and I was in the middle of the group was actually a boon now, keeping anyone from noticing the darkness nibbling on the rope. It was slow going without full use of my hands, seconds loudly ticking away in my head. I held onto the scraps, not wanting the falling pieces to give me away.
So now I had some agency back. Good. What was next?
The sound of pounding feet brought attention to a man charging in, swathed in leather and cotton like his fellows. Panting, he called for "Roddick," who had to be the painted-belly-man that hailed him.
"What're you hollerin' about?"
So began some quiet discussion, which I could only hope was the news of the Shepherds approach. They were on the way! The other bandits continued leading us west, then north towards the belly of the fort. Donnel's mother lagged behind, no doubt hoping for a chance to confirm her son was alive.
Okay... okay, um, I just... I have to get ready.
For what? Still a work in progress. But I didn't want to be in the back of the fort, now that I realized help was probably coming in from the southern path. I slowed down, letting even the older gentleman who'd eaten dirt earlier pass by. I had to keep as little distance between me and the Shepherds as I could.
A child cut in front of me to keep up with her mother. I nearly blew my cover when I went to gently grab her. I held my breath, but somehow no one noticed. WAY too close!
We were going further in than I had expected, which was a problem. While some of the bandits went to prep for combat, a few hung around, making sure us prisoners didn't get up to anything. Another problem. Why couldn't they just be overconfident idiots? Gotta make me work for it, huh.
One began harassing Donnel's mother behind me. "Quit your blubberin', cow!" His axe gleamed in the dim torchlight as he lifted it up, threatening her. And that was the final straw.
I tried to subtly twist my hand by my waist. Dark tendrils shot across the dirt and crept up the man's leg. His attention snapped downwards just as the shadows erupted, throwing him off of his feet. The woman screamed, falling over in her fear. Bet they heard THAT. Doubly unfortunate, my next step was a doozy: My foot caught on rubble, sending me crashing to the ground.
When I pushed myself off the ground and found a bandit staring at me, I knew the jig was up.
"Don't move!"
I rolled onto my side and slashed a spell across his torso. Then I scrambled to my feet and bolted, not waiting to see how he fared against it.
ShitshitshitSHIT!
People were turning around. I forced some to duck behind cover using a fireball and kept running. The scream and scuffle had been enough to sound the alarm unfortunately, as the fort was teeming with assholes now. I had to keep moving south to have any hopes to reunite with the Shepherds. But my beeline was interrupted by the crumbling fort I was inside. "Fucking dammit all to hell—"
Footsteps behind me proved I couldn't slow down to reassess. I had to push forward.
A man held up his bow ahead of me. My wind spell didn't cut the string, but it made him fumble. I yanked down the nearby torch and smashed it against the wall, throwing us both into darkness. I guessed and threw another wind spell.
Did it hit? No clue. But I kept running. No time to trade blows!
I took a right and had to slip past someone reaching for a weapon. Aiming for another torch, I was lucky his axe dug into stone and not my flesh. I was never more grateful for darkness than I was at that moment. Speaking of! It was more guesswork without a light, but I at least flung an explosive ball of dark magic at the ground near him, if his swear was anything to go by. Sliding along the wall until I felt wood, I grasped the doorknob... and swore. Of course it was locked.
Not for long! I didn't have time to fumble around in the dark for a key, if there even was one. I chanced a step back to fling another fireball. The wood cracked loudly, but remained standing.
"Get 'er!"
"Fucking—open!" Wind became a gale, which I aimed at the hinges as I had back at Ylisstol. And the door finally fell, allowing me to duck inside.
There were some chests, probably locked with my luck—and a guy, definitely hostile with my luck. But he was startled by my entrance, giving me a moment to react.
Only a moment. Fwip! Miss, thank the gods. Close quarters and lack of lighting were the only reason he hadn't stuck me with that arrow. Instead of trying to fire back, I turned back around. Who needed treasure, anyway?
Two panicked spells later, and I was running back inside, because fuck those bandits coming after me! I really hated axes.
I set the door's remains on fire as a deterrent. No one wants to burn. The bandit in there with me knew he was in a tight spot, but to his credit he cast aside his bow to pull out a knife. Goodie.
"Don't move," he shouted. How original.
"I'll set this whole goddamn room on fire!" My voice was shrill, the adrenaline causing me to shake.
He hesitated.
My gaze darted around. I need something to throw!
He came at me. Wind gouged the stone in front of him, I leapt behind a shelf, and then lightning arced to his knife and up his arm. The searing pain forced him to drop his only weapon. I unleashed a tongue of flames before pressing my back against the wall. He screamed, trying to pat it out, before deciding to make a break for it through the equally fiery entrance. I didn't care if he survived or not. I was finally alone.
The odor of burning flesh clung to the air. I leaned over a chest, trying not to gag. The rapid-fire spells, and everything leading up to them, had left me breathless and buzzing.
"Fuck... fuck. I'm... I'm not cut out for this shit!"
Whoever the fuck thought that being a hero without back-up is awesome was going to be getting a swift kick to the teeth.
Back-up. Right. I needed that. The Shepherds were coming—or here, I didn't have a clue at this point—but they didn't know that I was here in general, or this room in particular. Bolstering the flame wall and praying that no one else would brave it, I examined the room. Maybe I could bust these chests open for when they got here?
Thank god this whole place has gone to shit, I thought, after some hinge-targeting spells. Otherwise, I might've needed to get keys!
"Spread out!"
"Don't let 'em past ya!"
The bandits were upset about something. Either that's the villagers running for it, or Chrom finally got his ass over here! Please be Chrom. Or both!
There was some old useless weaponry in the chests, but in one I found a lance that looked like it might still be decent, and a sparkly staff in the other. I had no clue what the hell it did, because of course it didn't come with a label. I tried tapping the crystal at the top... swirling it around... even thumping the ground with it. But nothing happened. Add that to the list of Pick Lissa's Brain. Thinking of the thieves that might be around, I stowed the items in a corner with an "ignore me" hex and shut the chests. The hinges were broken, but maybe it would fool them?
Now, how to get the Shepherds' attention?
The fire wall was a pain to bolster, but I didn't want to risk anyone cornering me in here. It was getting unbearable though, even without a roof to trap all of the heat in here.
Wait! I stopped the futile effort to wipe away the sweat, staring at the cloudy night sky. There wasn't a roof to stop me! I could send out a lightning bolt or something to get their attention!
A hand swung over the wall above my head. I stumbled away, falling on my ass as I watched a man start to heft himself over.
No roof to stop them, either!
I nearly tripped over a few weapons I'd discarded, and the man landed with a grunt. I was staring at another axe, this one aiming for me. It caught on a wooden shelf, but pain burst in my skull. Fuck, had it knicked me? I unleashed a windy burst, throwing both of us away from each other. Panicky magic was becoming a habit.
He recovered so fast! I needed him to stay down! My palms slammed together, then ripped apart, opening a dark rift. The man screamed as it engulfed his arm, but it was overshadowed by the roar of magic colliding. The dark spell twisted with the nearby fire wall, and an explosion shook the fort.
I didn't hear my own scream at first. Hot coals peppered me like rain, and my eyes burned with hellfire.
But I couldn't hear the other guy anymore. Maybe I was alone again. I crawled, grasping blindly. Tears streamed down my face. I couldn't even swear through the pain. I found a corner and prayed I would be forgotten, clutching useless spoils to my chest.
If only Lissa had come. If only I hadn't been kidnapped again.
Would it ever get easier to face death head-on?
Hoofbeats brought meager hope, and a gruff female voice convinced me to stop my sniveling to croak, "I-in here!" My eyes still hurt, and trying to peer through my tears only made it worse. "Sul-ly!"
"Y-yer Knightliness! I heard somethin'!"
"Cut it out with the "knightly" bull—and stay here!" There was the clinking of armor, and a wooden crack. The fire had stopped popping some time ago. "What the... aw, hell."
I wanted to see her, for the comfort. Ow, fuck, my EYES. My gasp preceded loud footsteps, the sharp sound of steel plates rubbing together. Someone knelt in front of me.
"Tell 'em I found Megan," Sully shouted over her shoulder. "Alive!"
"Yes ma'am! U-uh, Sir..." And the voice faded with distance.
"Hey," she breathed. I felt a palm on my cheek. "You alright, kid? Here, this'll help."
She tipped my head back to down a bitter liquid. Whereas a healing spell was a cool tingle from head-to-toe, this was more of a lukewarm itch that started in my aches. The cavalier kept me from rubbing them until finally, I could blink the majority of the tears (possibly blood) away. Without the torch or the fire wall, I could barely see her, but her silhouette was better than nothing.
Swallowing, I tried a joking tone. "If anyone's the kid..."
"Yeah, yeah, you're old." She hoisted me up, a steadying presence before letting me stand on my own. "If anyone's a kid, it's the farmer boy we picked up. Hey, Donny!"
"Y-yes'm?" A figure appeared in the doorway, or rather, slipping on what was left of it. I had blasted it to hell and back. "Uh, the coast is clear, Miss Lady Knight!"
As Sully led me out of there, she argued, "I ain't no lady, and I ain't no miss! Lon'qu, get your arse over here! You're babysitting Donny! Megan, get on the horse." The swordsman was standing at the corner, keeping an eye out. Somewhere, Robin was shouting orders to push forward.
I took a deep breath and shook my head. Even that hurt. "I-I'm fine. We need—"
"Like hell, you are!"
"Sully, there are hostages and we need to make sure they're safe!"
Donnel stepped forward. "I-is Ma okay? Please tell me she's not...!"
I wiped my eyes one last time and smiled, ignoring the pain. "Last I saw, she was safe. Scared, but safe." The boy let out a shaky breath, then held up his lance. A brave young man. I remembered my spoils, but hesitated briefly. How did weapon ranks and proficiencies translate to reality?
Sully took the decision from me, physically. "They're safer on my horse than you flailing 'em around." Giving me a look, she groaned and swung into the saddle. "Fine, but don't you run off again! Scared us half to death!"
I muttered under my breath. It's not like it was voluntary! Okay, one more eye wipe—NOW I'm good.
As the cavalier rode off with Donnel sitting behind her, I flexed my hands, feeling them out. They stung even now. But a vulnerary isn't a cure-all, it just takes the edge off. Lon'qu and I locked gazes for a beat. "Thank you," I told him, because I'd forgotten to tell Sully.
But he'd already looked away. Still. It was something.
In moments, another horse came by to drop off Robin, who actually took the remaining strides towards me... to wrap me up in a hug. What? I was stunned, just sort of standing there, and then it was over. He gripped my shoulders, meeting my gaze.
"Are you okay?"
"I... yeah." Hug... Hug? Was this really the time for that? My chest felt strange.
"Didn't I tell you to be careful?"
"...yeah." I blinked, and pushed past him. A small part of me was thankful, but I had to focus. My eyes still stung. "How many guys have you taken out?"
"Four confirmed, for now." At least he didn't try to stop me. He moved as my shield as we both peered around the other corner. We were all on high alert. "What can you tell me?"
"The hostages were taken towards the back, but I don't know if they ran once the fighting started. There's a room—" I pointed diagonally down the "hall" of sorts. "Over there. I think that's where the leader might be. Roderick? Fuck that guy. We were there—" I pointed across. "—first. There were two guys with axes—"
"I sent Vaike and Miriel in there," Robin cut in.
"Hope they axed them a few questions," I muttered bitterly. Rubbing my sternum, I continued, "There might be a back exit, but I didn't see side exits, unless they just climb over the fucking wall like the guy I exploded."
He snorted. "I thought that was you. Magic?"
"Accidentally hit fire with dark."
"Please be more careful."
"I was kind of panicking—"
An arrow zipped past our heads, forcing us back behind cover. That motherfucker!
"I'll blow you up too, fucklechuck," I shouted over the wall.
Robin tapped my shoulder, pointing at me, at the corner, and then himself. Did he want me to stay, or to cover him? I leaned in, and he clarified. A diversion, huh? Okay, I got one for you. I took a step back, waiting for his signal.
Without a roof in my way, I sent a few big flashy sparks up over the wall. In a rush of wind, Robin darted forward and out of sight. Seems he's mastered elwind after all. I ran to replace him, hoping I wouldn't see an arrow between his eyes—but he was fine, having caught the archer off-guard with his sword. If only I could wield magic and blade simultaneously. Lon'qu brought up the rear, though he still looked a bit twitchy about being within twenty paces of me. At least he could tame it in combat.
This was the central hallway of the fort, or what was left of it. Looking ahead, I could see some people huddled together. But I kept myself from running over, eyeing our dim surroundings. I had knocked these torches out, huh.
"Light?"
"Would give away our positions," Robin pointed out.
"I think they know we're here. Hallway bottlenecks us, anyway." I manifested an arcane light, telling him, "Use your eagle eyes to magic-parry shit?" He snorted, but electricity crackled in his palm as he stepped forward.
I feel like I'm forgetting something... Hostages, Donnel, bandits, chests... wait.
"Did you fight any thief guys?"
"Thief guys?"
Neck prickling, I spun around. But no one came at us from behind. Paranoia, thy name is Megan. I just didn't want to risk it. I strode past Lon'qu and crouched. What I wouldn't do for some chalk, I thought, eyeing the cobblestone.
Then I really examined my bloody hands. "Oh, fucking DUH."
"Megan?"
"I'm keeping us from getting backstabbed." I waited for his okay before getting to work. The blood was a bit dry, but I managed to scrape off enough for a rudimentary rune of protection. I stood and traced a line with the toe of my boot. It was more ceremony than anything else, without something to properly mark it. Pausing, I asked, "Where are the others?"
The clatter of steel made me jump, but it was only Vaike coming out of the room I was first brought to. He grinned when he saw me. "Megan!"
"Get over here," I said in lieu of greeting, feet planted on either side of the rune. Though, I appreciate the warm welcome. His attempts to be affectionate were waylaid by Robin's arm so I had some space. Miriel followed behind. The firelight from my spell casted odd shadows over her face, making it unreadable. I asked her, "Where's Stahl and the others?"
"They are ensuring the security of the perimeter."
"Okay. Get clear, I'm throwing up a barrier!"
She stepped forward to assist, strengthening it with more runes. Bless her charcoal. The arcane matrix stretched the span of the hallway, crackling with electricity as the other had. I was surprised when Miriel released her hold, yet it remained.
"I have done my own research," she informed me.
I really should've brainstormed with her more, I thought. I shouldn't have kept to myself.
Pushing her glasses up, Miriel stood at the ready, further discomforting Lon'qu with her proximity. I don't know why I thought placing a hand on her shoulder and standing between them would help. Like a woman acting as a shield from another woman meant anything. But we had other problems. There was screaming up ahead, which couldn't be anything good.
"Vaike, Miriel, with me—Megan and Lon'qu, bring up the rear!"
I glanced at the barrier behind us. Hope that keeps any reinforcements from sneaking in. As long as there wasn't another entrance. It cut us off from our own too, but we could pull it down if need be. I was glad I didn't have to make the decisions anymore. The real tactician was here. I could handle following orders.
We pushed forward instead of hanging a right. The screaming hostages seemed the more pressing matter. Can always kick that asshole's teeth in after, if he hasn't split. Some of the villagers were pressed against the wall here. Vaike stepped into the room first, but Robin gripped his shoulder to force him still. I couldn't see over everyone. Goddammit, I hate being short!
I peeked past Miriel's robes. At least the torches were still lit in there. I had the perfect view of the three men holding prisoners as meat shields, steel at their throats. One of them was Donnel's mother. Because of course it was.
"Ain't nobody move," the center man barked. "Unless ya want us ta bleed 'em dry!"
Son of a—
"Let them go," Robin ordered. "We don't have to resort to violence."
"Do as we say, an' we won' have ta!" He held the dagger in place as he pointed with his other hand. "Put yer weapons down an' let us through!"
Damn. We might have outnumbered them, but obviously we didn't want them to do anything to the villagers. To be fair, they had to know that the moment they actually injured anyone that we'd descend on them like wolves... But no one wanted to be the cause of innocent blood being spilled. What if I had to look Donnel in the eye and tell him that his mother had died thanks to my carelessness? Maybe at another time I would've considered it better to try taking them out. But after the rollercoaster that this whole debacle had been, I didn't suggest it.
So while I didn't agree with Robin's order to stand down, I didn't argue. Lon'qu's brow furrowed, and Vaike voiced a protest, but the tactician's words were final. Weapons were tossed to the ground before the bandits relented.
"Now move over—hands in th' air—an' don't try anything funny wit' yer mage!" Gesturing for us to get out of his way, he waited, eyes glinting as steel.
This was a bad, bad situation.
I caught Donnel's mother looking at me, uncertainty clouding her expression. With the others' attention elsewhere, I was able to give her a thumbs-up in silent encouragement. We weren't going to let anything happen to them.
She closed her eyes, lips moving slowly. By the time I realized that she was counting to three, her elbow slammed backwards into her captor's gut.
"Whoa!"
In a flash, everyone was moving for their weapons. I wrenched a hand to clutch another bandit with dark magic, twisting until I heard something pop. Donnel's mother stumbled forward, letting Miriel's fireball slam into that man's chest. The third shoved his captive and tried to run away, but before we could do anything about it he was tripped and slammed face-first into the dirt. The old man that stood and kicked at him looked particularly vindictive.
The other Shepherds came around the corner of what once was the back wall, effectively ending the squabble. But we still had to deal with the leader of this merry band. I was instructed to guard the villagers as Vaike and Sully tied the bandits up, while Robin and Chrom went with a few others to scope out the last room of the fort. I checked on Donnel, and his mother on the ground—and finally asked for her name.
"Faye? That's my grandmother's name." I helped her up and gave a wide, if tired smile. "You were... amazing. I can see where your son gets his braveness." Donnel's face colored at the compliment.
"Oh... I'm nothing much," she argued, gaze on her clasped hands. They had been shaking. "You Shepherds are the real heroes."
"Not all heroes wear capes, or armor."
"Donny's as much a hero as anyone here," Sully came in, slinging an arm around his shoulders. Damn, he was almost her height already. Definitely taller than me. "Kid's got spunk! He'd make a damn good knight."
"Y-Yer Knightliness—er, I mean—"
"Well, if Sully says it, it must be true!" I laughed, slapping his back like I was trying to be Basilio. "I'm going to check on everyone else. Keep your mom safe, okay?"
"Uh, yes, ma'am!"
Eh, the awkwardness will fade with time. I hoped that, if he did join the Shepherds, he would find it a home away from home. Gods know I do.
"Good heavens! Lady Megan, are you quite all right?"
I blinked, wincing. My eyes stung, either from sweat or injury. Virion had somehow managed to keep himself looking rather clean and orderly despite the fight. I probably looked like I'd worked in a stable all day. He offered me a kerchief, which I stared at before deciding to carefully wipe my eyes.
"All right enough," I croaked. After everything, I just wanted to sleep.
I had some hands on my shoulders and my back, offering support and expressing their relief for having me back. It reminded me of Ferox. I wished I had more energy to show them all just how grateful I was. As it was, I was trying not to fall over. What a night.
Stahl offered me a spot on his horse. Which was good, because I didn't fancy walking all the way back to town. He also returned my hat. He and Vaike had found it when looking for me that afternoon. I had to tip it back so it wasn't knocked off by his proximity, but the familiarity was comforting. I was so tired I didn't bother feeling awkward about being all up in his business. I just had to stay conscious enough not to fall off the horse.
"That makes another big mistake for Vaike and I, huh..."
"Mm?" I couldn't open my eyes much, with my cheek pressed up against his armor. "No... no, it was those assholes' fault..."
"But you wouldn't have been taken if we'd been paying more attention," he argued. Then he sighed. "I could've sworn you were right next us, but then you went missing and... I'm sorry."
"Don't. I wandered..." I yawned. "Like a dumbass. They're looking for easy targets. Not yer fault. Would'a just... grabbed some girl."
"I wish it didn't happen to any girl."
"Better me than someone else."
Not that I had done much, or that the villagers hadn't kicked ass themselves. But at least I'd had the ability to fuck shit up before they could start carting people off.
Stahl had gone quiet. The others were chatting around us, but my brain couldn't process any conversation as more than just noise. I tried to hum a tune but forgot how it went in the middle, so I opted to count the horse's rhythmic strides.
"I can understand why you say that." Stahl's words vibrated through his armor, bringing my attention back to the waking world. "Your magic gave you an advantage the villagers didn't have." Why did I feel like there was a "but" coming up?
"They kicked some ass too," I mumbled. Gotta give credit where it's due.
He chuckled. "Yeah, they did, huh? But, Megan... It sounds pretty awful, but I'm not glad that it was you instead. You might have been able to handle it, but—you shouldn't have needed to. Not alone."
My glasses were starting to dig into my face, so I stuck them onto my shirt and took the opportunity to dry the tears. I didn't want it to be me, either. I could say what I wanted, but at the end of the day, I'm just one person. A fairly small person, at that, who was still getting used to this land and its dangers. Having him come out and say that reminded me of the fear, and of the relief that the Shepherds had my back. I was so very lucky to have them.
I didn't know what to say, so I remained quiet as Stahl kept talking. "You've dealt with a lot since you've come here. This isn't your first kidnapping! And you've been taking all of this—the war, the suspicions, traveling through foreign countries—you've taken it all in stride. But it can't be easy.
"I just... I don't want you to think you have to do it all alone. You're one of us, you know? You can lean on us."
I didn't want to make it obvious that I was crying, so I kept my breathing even and didn't bother wiping them away. There was a hard lump in my throat.
"...Sorry if I'm being pushy." He gave a sheepish laugh. "I just, noticed some things, is all."
What had he noticed? Maybe he knew I was holding back on certain things. My aunt had once told me that I always kept my cards close to my chest. It was more than just the world-changing information I had, though. I'm a cheerful, goofy person, but there are things that I don't share either because I'd be uncomfortable opening up or I just don't feel the need to. If Stahl picked up on that with his observational skills... I was kind of surprised he didn't have any suspicions of me too. Or, maybe he did.
...no. That was unfair to him. He had never given me reason to doubt his sincerity. Sure, he could see through some of my shit. But maybe that was a good thing.
"Thank you," I managed to tell him. It wasn't loud enough, so I cleared my throat and repeated myself.
"You're welcome. Now I don't know about you, but I'm starving. Let's see what the taverns have left over when we get back into town."
I laughed, because of course Stahl would bring up food immediately after calling me out. It was a watery laugh, but hey, still counts. I felt a lot better now.
"Sure."
Despite the exhaustion and the others' urging, I wasn't able to just fall face-first into bed and pass out like I wanted.
The creaking and groaning of the inn we were staying at kept me awake. It was stupid. But I kept thinking about the knife to my throat, or the man that had realized I wasn't restrained and went for his axe. The battle at the cliffs was on a larger scale, but on the flip side, this had felt much more personal. I had been singled out. I had been alone. The wyvern incident had been horrifying, but the rest of the Shepherds had been around for its entirety. I knew that no one was going to creep in through the window tonight, but I still couldn't help wishing it had glass panes. Because they wouldn't, but they could.
I really was too paranoid for my own good. Had I ever freaked out this much, back in my world? ...okay, yeah, I had. Guess it's in my nature.
Eventually I gave up and dragged myself downstairs. I wasn't expecting to find anyone awake at this hour, so the silhouette by the low fire startled me. But I dropped my hand once I realized it was only Lon'qu, sharpening his blade. I need to calm down before I kill someone.
He inclined his head, and I mirrored it before deciding to go stand outside and take in the salty night. The constant breeze and the tang reminded me of my grandfather's beach cottage. I hadn't really been fond of playing on the beach, but dozing in the sunlight was only outdone by walking the length of it at night. I couldn't see the sand from here, but I could faintly hear the waves crashing against the shore. I closed my eyes, and just... existed for a while.
Another night alive in Awakening World.
After observing the moon and the multitudes of stars for a while, my teeth were threatening to chatter. I ducked back inside, seeing Lon'qu was still sharpening his sword. Or was it another one? The subtle, rhythmic sound had been unnerving, but now that I was feeling more at ease it was soothing. Like ocean waves.
The smokey, dim atmosphere of the room made me linger, thinking now of summers with friends around a bonfire. Marshmallows probably weren't a thing in this period, were they? Pity. S'mores would be hella right about now.
I was before the stairs when Lon'qu made a noise. I paused, glancing back but not really thinking it was for me. Maybe his hand had slipped. But he was looking at me again, sword on hold. I blinked owlishly. "Huh?"
"Take it," he ordered. When I continued to stare at him, he inclined his head at the opposite corner. I had glanced over the cup sitting there, figuring it was leftover from earlier that night. But I realized now it had something fresh and hot in it. Where had he... ah, there was a kettle beside the fireplace.
I pointed at myself, still a bit thrown. That was mine? He grunted in affirmative, before getting back to work. Entirely befuddled, I stepped closer and peered into it. A big ol' whiff brought a surge of emotions. Tea. Glorious tea. Lon'qu's tea? He had remembered?
Tonight is just the night of tears, innit?
I murmured thanks, and took the seat marked by the cup. I couldn't help smiling at it. Pressing my hands against the sides proved it was still rather hot, so I held onto it for a time just to stare into the dying fire. The way it danced and crackled felt like seeing an old friend. Whaaat, I never played with fire as a kid, I would never. It wasn't the flames of war, but the heart of a home, that burned in that fireplace. I felt something mirror it in my chest.
Tomorrow would be the return to the mainland, and the trek back to Ylisstol. After that, the attack on the royal family would take place in the castle, and the beginning of a campaign of fear from the Mad King. The war would progress... people would die... and I would question myself over and over. Whether I was doing things right, doing the right thing, being the best person I could be for the Shepherds and the world at large.
But tonight?
Tonight, there was peace. There was warmth. And there was hope to seize a brighter future than fate had handed us.
.
IMPORTANT NOTE! This story is (mostly) being discontinued!
I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but this fanfic is being cut short. My partner for this jaunt has quit both the fic and FFN at large. Theoretically, I could go back and hardcore rework the earlier chapters to edit his contributions out and continue the story, but it would be so much work that I might as well write an entirely new one.
On the other hand, I don't mind writing extra bits, for fun. I've been writing this for years, so of course I've grown attached. With that said, its setup would be similar to my other FEA series, "Just wait for me to get a little taller, okay?" This would mean scenes ranging from fluffy to silly to dramatic, and so on. They would be loosely connected, and in this case possibly out of chronological order. Really, it depends on if I feel like writing more and if you guys want it. Feel free to suggest ideas, too!
I'm sorry to stop the adventure here—hell, I finished what I'd already written for this chapter (and then some) to make up for ending it all—but part of it was out of my hands. If I'm being honest, even if my partner hadn't left I've been feeling dissatisfied for a while now with how I executed this one.
I'm going to come at the Self-Insert Fic trope again in the future! But I'll be able to actually plan everything in more detail, and won't have to wrestle with someone's vastly differing views. (I will have a partner for SI Fic 2.0 too, but one I'm far more comfortable writing with, and it'll be a bit different than this one's paralleling stories concept.)
Let me know what you all think, and I may release some scrapped scenes and bonuses in the coming year. I truly enjoyed playing in this fic, and I'm so very thankful for all of you who left such inspiring reviews. You guys helped me keep at it for this long!
Here's to a brighter future in 2019, for all of us! And remember: Anything can change! So take Luci and Megan's advice, and challenge your fate!
-Dragon
P.S.: You can also contact me at thedragonlover on Twitter, tumblr (though that site's gone to shit even more) or AO3, or message me on either of those platforms to get my Discord!
